Disclaimers: I do not own Fairy Tail
A/N: This is an Omake from "Romeo's Rising"
Also, please check out my other stories such as:
Fiery Hurricane of Love
Right Claw of the Dragon King
The Wild Master
and others.
FYI: This has no impact on the story.
Omake
My Life Is Not A Harem Manga
"What the hell is going on in here?", Romeo asks as he looked upon Gildarts' room that he was currently sharing with Acnologia in Crocus in the early morning on another day of the Grand Magic Games, "Where did all those come from?"
Smack dab in the middle of the considerably small hotel room laid a small mountain of books that Romeo was quite sure wasn't there last night. The boy briefly turns his attention toward the S-Class mage who was currently sitting on in his corner of the room on top of his bed with his arms cross grumbling something about his "drinking money" if Romeo heard correctly.
"Okay, I'm probably not going to get any answers from the mage who is literally a walking disaster, let's try our luck with the walking apocalypse", Romeo says as he now focuses on Acnologia, "Who is surprisingly reading the books."
Tuck away into his own little corner of the room with a miniature stack of reading material, was Acnologia, who seemed to be completely engrossed with one.
"Huh, I forget sometimes that you can read", Romeo commented.
"I'll have you know, little vermin, that I know the entire alphabet and vocabulary of over two thousand "dead" languages, a good number of them not even human", Acnologia retort from his place, his eyes never once looking up.
"Yes, yes, ten millennia-old dragon, I got it", Romeo says as he twirls his wrist, "That still doesn't explain why you're reading...", as he took a closer look, "Manga? Are you reading comic books?"
"Do you find it beneath me to read such material?", Acnologia asked.
"Well, yeah", Romeo bluntly answered, "I figure you were into more philosophical stuff like poems that illustrate the downfall of humanity and how its arrogance and vanity has led to the current situation the world now sees itself in and how we're only one conflict away from sprawling into the infinite maw of the dark abyss; along with ones that point out how our only true chance for redemption is to let it all burn down so we can start anew like a phoenix rising out of the ashes."
Gildarts and Acnologia both turn to stare at Romeo with wide-eyed expressions.
"What?", Romeo wonders as he shrugs, "I knew some of this before you even got into my head. Levy didn't have anyone else to talk to about this stuff because no one wanted to listen."
"Okay, I'm just going to pretend I didn't hear that", Gildarts started, "Anyway, Scaly here got bored during the night and since he couldn't go out without me following him, he decided to ask the innkeeper if he had anything for him to read."
"And all he had was a crap ton of manga?"
"Which belonged to his grandsons", Acnologia added in, "Apparently to keep them occupy whenever they visit."
"And how exactly did you get him to give you all of this?", Romeo question, knowing full well what the answer was going to be.
"I can be very persuasive when I want to be", was Acnologia's answer, "By the way, I hope your guild doesn't mind paying for a couple of broken tables."
Romeo massages his temples as he feels a migraine starting to happen, "And here I thought my girl problems were my only issue."
"I'm happy you said that little vermin, for a great number of these pertain to the unique situation you find yourself in", Acnologia informs the boy as he finally closes the book he was reading, "Particularly the harem genre."
"Harem?"
"Yes, a large majority revolve around the plot of a single young male such as yourself, drawing the affections of multiple young females, such as the Sky Dragon-Slayer vermin, the Ash/Smoke vermin, the Grand Summoner vermin, the Vegetable magic vermin, and the Sky God-Slayer vermin, whether he wants too or not", Acnologia explain causing Romeo to stare at him blankly for a moment.
"You mean Wendy, Lindsay, Kaja, Beth, and Chelia, right?", he finally asked.
"If you must use their real names, yes", Acnologia replied, "I have noticed during the course of reading that each girl matches a certain trope that is frequently found within the harem manga."
"I can't believe I'm hearing this", Romeo mutters as he looks toward Gildarts who was now watching things unfold with an attentive glean in his eyes, "You're enjoying this?"
Gildarts merely shrugs, "Nothing else to do, games don't start for a while."
"Anyway, as I was saying, each girl in your harem-", Acnologia continued.
"I don't have a harem!", Romeo voices before slighty shaking his head, "I just happen to have more than one girl who just so happens to have some sort of crush on me."
"Which is exactly what a harem is", Acnologia explains, "Take, for example, the Sky Dragon-Slayer vermin-"
"Wendy!", Romeo corrects.
"Whatever, she shares the traits of the cute clumsy girl, as well as the shy girl who you have had a crush on since you were younger", Acnologia says and then watches in amusement as Romeo started to blush and look away.
"I-I didn't have a crush on Wendy when I was a kid", he stutters out.
"Yeah, and I didn't genocide a whole country in one night", Acnologia scoff.
"Wow, that got dark pretty quickly", Gildarts comments.
"Moving on to the Ash/Smoke vermin-"
"Lindsay."
"Who obviously is playing the role of the childhood friend. You two have known each other since before you could even walk and now she's cashing in on all those childhood memories you two have shared together in an effort to get closer to you and become something more", Acnologia says before tapping his chin, "Though with her aggressiveness and assertiveness, she could be partially classified as the tom-boy crush."
"This is getting pretty interesting now", Gildarts states.
"Lindsay and I are friends and nothing more", Romeo tells the Dragon King.
"Keep telling yourself that, little vermin. Now to the Grand Summoner vermin."
"Are you and I going to keep doing this?", Romeo asks only to receive a blank stare in return, "Her name is Kaja."
"Who fits the cool big sis trope to a "T", despite not being your sister, obviously. She's the oldest of your suitors, at least two years older than yourself, yet that has not stopped her from making her claim. She also cares for you in way that if she didn't see you as a potential lover, it would most likely be in the younger brother sense.", Acnologia instructs, "Plus, she seem to have an air of authority about her."
"You have put in a lot thought into this and it's quite disturbing", Romeo points out as he notices that Gildarts had produced a bag of popcorn from out of nowhere and was now munching on its contents, "Oh my gods, let's just keep going because you're almost done."
"The second to last on our list is the Vegetable Mage", Acnologia says before stopping and turning his full attention to Romeo, who just told there with his arms cross, "Well?"
"You already know her name is Beth. There, happy?"
"Now she without a doubt fits the tomboy genre. From her hard-working attitude to the clothes she wears, she is straight and forward though she does have a shy side. The fact that she only started having a crush on you a few days ago but has already outshined the others in some aspect speaks volume about her", Acnologia damn near praise, "She uses farming references around you for goodness sake."
Romeo could feel his eye twitching at the statement, but decides for the best to say nothing.
"And at last, we have the Sky God-Slayer vermin or as you call her..."
"Chelia; can we please get this over with?", Romeo nearly begs.
"Ah, yes. She is quite the particular one. She is definitely a tsundere...", Acnologia started.
"A what?", Romeo interjects.
"You know, a girl who switches between affection and hostility at a moment's notice", Gildarts, of all people, explains, "Kinda like my little girl."
"First of all, the fact that you know what that means is just as disturbing as Acno here doing this harem thing. Second, Cana has almost no affection for you, it's complete hostility", Romeo calls him out.
"I like to call it "tough love", in a father-daughter sort of sense", Gildarts smiles.
"But", Acnologia goes on, "If this were a school setting, she would definitely be the school idol, pretty much the ace in everything she does, including getting capture."
"Are we done now? The rest of the guild is about to leave for the games", Romeo reminds them.
"And counting in the factor that she has the largest chest size of all the girls...", Acnologia went on before Romeo held up a hand.
"I'm going to stop you right there because now it's starting to get sick and wrong", Romeo declares, "She's fifteen for gods' sake."
"And I'm over ten thousand years old. Pretty much unless you're a dragon yourself or an immortal being, everyone is a child to me, so it doesn't matter who I look at", Acnologia explains as Romeo turns around and walks out the door.
"Leaving now!", he hollers back as he left the two powerful being alone in their room. A moment of silence passes between them before the Ace of Fairy Tail spoke up.
"Hey, what about...?"
"The Fairy Ghost vermin? It's too early to see where her feelings lie. She may only see Romeo as a member of her guild or perhaps something more, who knows? I mean, she is like a hundred years older than him", Acnologia says.
"But she looks around his age physically", Gildarts says as he moves toward the door.
"Like I said, whose knows. That is all up to a higher power", Acnologia shrugs as looks skyward at the ceiling, "Though going off all of the books I have read, the little vermin and his harem are only missing one thing."
"And what is that?", Gildarts wonders.
"A beach scene or a place where he can see them all in swimming suits. It's the one constant thing in the harem genre I have come to observe", Acnologia admits.
"Okay, but where exactly is something like that going to happen to him in the middle of the capital?", Gildarts wonders.
A/N: Where indeed? ;)
Wendy: Cute Clumsy Girl
Kaja: Older Sister type being the oldest of the five main girls
Lindsay: Definitely Childhood Friend
Beth: Tomboy with a shy side,
Chelia: Tsundere
