Chapter Thirteen
This is starting to become a familiar feeling – waking up next to Vala, and it was something Daniel could get used to, something he wanted to get used to. They hadn't changed positions at all during the night; Vala's head remained tucked underneath his chin and his arms around her. Unfortunately, what was also becoming familiar and normal for them was Vala abruptly bolting from the bed to empty whatever her stomach held. As he held back her hair for the second morning in a row, Daniel wished there was something he could do about this part to make it better.
"Make it stop, Daniel," Vala whined as she leaned back against him.
"I wish I could, sweetheart," he replied remorsefully.
"I hate you for this."
Daniel couldn't help the chuckle that escaped. "I know and I'm sorry it has to be this way."
"I don't know why the Tau'ri thinks this process is so magical," Vala said bitterly, "there's nothing magical about it. Now help me up."
Daniel slowly helped her stand and grabbed his mouthwash from the cabinet for her to use. "Here, use this."
Vala paused for a second before grabbing it. "Right, not allowed to brush teeth right afterwards."
"You don't have to use it if you don't want to," Daniel told her, "I'm just trying to help."
"I know you are, darling," she gave him a small smile, "I just can't stand feeling sick; makes me cranky and whining. Sorry I'm taking it out on you."
"Well…I am partially responsible for your predicament so if it makes you feel better, go for it."
Vala spat out the minty tasting liquid. "I don't think it does physically, just mentally."
"Whatever helps," he smiled at her, "Feel any better?"
She grimaced. "Not really."
"So you're not feeling up to eating anything?"
"Gods no," she instantly replied, "but I could use water."
"I'll get you some," he volunteered.
Vala followed him out of the master and took a seat on the couch, bringing a pillow to her chest. She burrowed herself into the arm to get comfortable. She didn't think of anything in particular, just stared off into space, so to speak. That is until a glass of water appeared in front of her face. She took it with a thankful smile.
"You could've stayed in the bedroom; I would've brought it to you," Daniel told her, taking a seat next to her and wrapping an arm around her.
Vala cautiously sipped the water. "I think I'm done sleeping," she said.
"You sure?" he asked, "Because puking you guts out seems to be a tiring activity."
"I'm fine, I promise," she assured him.
"If you say so."
She set the water on the end table and snuggled into him, causing Daniel to chuckle. She wrinkled her nose. "What?"
"You just said you're not tired, yet here you are, snuggling up against me."
"I'm not doing it because I'm tired," she denied, "I'm doing it because it's comfortable…and comforting. Is that so wrong?"
"No," he said quietly, "Whatever makes you feel better," he repeated.
o0o
They had a lazy Saturday, one where they didn't do much but laze about. Most of it was spent on the couch, talking about nothing in particular, reading (well, Daniel did while Vala dozed), and watching TV. It was nice to not do anything of importance and just be with each other, to be somewhat normal for once. It wasn't always going to be this way, especially when the baby came, so they savored it before they had to face reality again.
Speaking of reality, as he sat on his couch with Vala's head in his lap, his mind returned to what they would be facing come Monday morning. He absently stroked Vala's still flat tummy as he realized they needed to discuss one final thing. "Vala?"
She turned her head away from the TV so she could see him. "You've got your serious face on," she noted.
"We have to tell them team and Landry – soon."
She shook her head. "No, not yet. Please."
"I know you're worried, but we can't keep this a secret," he reasoned, "We're scheduled to go off-world on Tuesday."
"So?"
"So?" he asked incredulous, "So, the SGC doesn't allow their pregnant personnel through the 'gate; it's not safe."
"Relax, darling, I've been off world plenty of times within the last few weeks and I'm fine."
Daniel cringed. "I'm trying very hard not to think about that and what could've happened to you two," he closed in his eyes, trying hold back his imagination from running wild. "The thought of the two of you getting hurt out there…it's hard to swallow. Something could've happened to you and her. We could've lost her and I wouldn't have even know about her."
"Daniel…"
"Promise me," he pleaded, "promise me we'll tell them Monday? For her sake and safety?"
Vala sighed. "I don't know…" she trailed off.
"Vala, Dr. Lam can only keep it quiet for so long, a week tops," he reminded her, "It's gonna come out soon and it's better if it came from us then from Lam. Cameron deserves that."
"Well, maybe I could talk to her and see if she'll keep quiet a bit longer?"
"If you go on the mission on Tuesday, I'm not gonna be able to stop myself from worrying; we're SG-1 and we attract trouble, and the others will notice and start asking questions. Do you really want that?"
"But maybe they won't, not if I'm extra careful and I'll stay in your sights the whole time," she bargained.
"Vala, what's going on?" he gave her a piercing stare, "I know you were worried that the Ori may have done something when they conceived Adria, but I'm getting the feeling that it's more than. Wanna tell me what's going on?"
Vala bit her lip and shifted her eyes to the ceiling.
"You know you can tell me anything, right?"
Her eyes shifted back to his. "If I tell, they'll take me off SG-1."
"Okay…" he dragged out, "and that's bad why?"
"Daniel, I earned that spot. I worked hard to be accepted by the SGC and to acquire that position. It's where I'm useful, it's how I earn my keep. Without it, what else do I have to offer?"
"You're kidding, right?" he asked in disbelief but saw her face, "You're not. Vala, how could you think that? You have so much more value that that. I understand that you worked very hard for that spot and how much it means to you, but sweetheart, you have so much more to offer."
"Like what?"
He chuckled in disbelief and shook his head slightly. "Yesterday when I came to pick you up at Sam's lab, I saw how you were with that piece of technology; you worked with it so confidently and were having fun. You have an amazing knack for it. You have expertise in large assortment of technology out there. It amazed me just how well you fit in with Sam and all the other scientists, but you can also kick my ass at translating anything Goa'uld, not to mention other languages. You can also still literally kick my ass, among many others. You've helped train newbies with Cameron and Teal'c on many occasions – something that you can't do until the baby is born, by the way – and let's not forget how you've helped improve base security."
Her face scrunched. "How did I do that?"
"By sneaking off of the base one too many times," laughter was in his voice.
"That was mainly your fault," she pointed a finger at him, "I go up to the surface after you've pissed me off; it's not my fault your security is so lax."
"My pointing being, you have a lot to offer and not just on SG-1, but throughout the entire SGC."
"And you're not just saying that?"
"I've told you several times now; I wouldn't lie to you, not about this."
"How do you always know just what to say?" she questioned.
"I don't know," he confessed thoughtfully, "If you haven't forgotten, I usually always say the wrong thing. If you need help remembering, just think back to a couple days ago, hell, the last few weeks."
"But you always know what to say when it really matters."
"While I don't think that's entirely true, I'm glad you think so," he brushed back a piece of hair, "I wanna be able to always say the right thing, to say what you need to hear but also have it be true."
"You're getting sappy again."
"And I don't give a damn," he told her with a smile before he went serious, "So, are we gonna tell them Monday?"
Vala took a deep breath. "Okay," she breathed out, "we can tell the Monday."
"It's gonna be alright, you know."
"I love SG-1, Daniel," she told him quietly, "It's one of the first times I've ever felt like I was home, like I was safe. It changed my life and saved it in other ways."
"I know what you mean," he really did since it had been the same for him, "but you'll always be a member, you'll always be apart of the team. You won't lose us as a family; couldn't even if you tried."
"What will happen once I'm off?"
"Well, that's probably going to be up to you to some degree. I'm sure Landry will ask if you have any preferences where you wanna work during your pregnancy, but I think your main choices will be with either Sam in the science labs or with me."
"Can't I do both?"
Daniel smiled down at her. "I'm sure that could be arranged," he assured, "wouldn't want you getting bored."
"You know me so well!"
"I do at that," he gave her a smug look the tilted his head. "What else made you feel safe and like you were at home?"
"Hmm?"
"You said SG-1 was one of the first times you felt safe and at home; what were the other times?"
She cocked as best as she could with it in his lap and didn't answer for a full minute. "I think it started the moment I met you on Prometheus, but I didn't know what it was until you tried like hell to save me in Ver Eger. No one had ever done anything like that for me. Tomin didn't even help me when I was chained to that altar for three days and at the time, he was my husband and believed Adria was his. But you, only you tried to save me, and you didn't even like me at the time. I knew I was home, you were home, when you saved me instead of taking Adria the day she was born. I knew you were home when I lost my memories, I knew I was safe with you. You were my Daniel, you always make me feel safe. So it's you; you were the first to make me feel at home and safe for the first time since before Qetesh took me as host. You are my home."
Just like that, he was scared shitless again. The last woman who had put the same amount of faith in him, he let down, and she ended up dead. Sha're had trusted him to keep him safe and protect her from the world, the galaxy, and he had failed. He had promised more than once that Vala was safe with him, that he would never let down, but what if he didn't? What if he couldn't keep his promise? He had every intention to until she told him all that stuff, making him realize that he hadn't kept the same promise to his wife. There was more at stake this time; they had their child to consider.
No, no, he wouldn't let his fears and doubt overtake him again. He would keep her and their child safe and he would make sure he was always their home, just like she was his.
"You are my home too," he murmured, "you are my heart and I'll fight like to make sure it stays that way."
"You won't be alone in that," she told him, "I'll always fight for us, whether it's against ourselves or the universe."
"I love you," he never got tired of saying that.
"I love you too."
He would also never get tired of hearing her say that.
