Bit of a shorter one today.
Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!
DAY FOURTEEN: VALENTINE'S DAY
8am.
February 14th.
Valentine's Day.
Marinette was pacing around her room, mumbling to herself as her brain ran through every way this whole plan could go wrong. All of the ways Chloé could mock her, or Lila could twist the situation, or Adrien could reject her, or the rest of the class could laugh at her embarrassment.
"What do I do, Tikki?" she whined. "I can't do this. I can't, nope, not happening."
Tikki, looking decidedly bored, sat on top of the desk and said nothing.
"No, I have to do it," Marinette muttered, hoping if she sounded like she had some conviction, she could fool herself into actually having conviction. "I will do it. I just have to...do it. But I don't know how. It's going to go wrong again, I can feel it. Oh, Tikki, Tikki!"
"Do you want my advice, Marinette?" Tikki asked, not moving from her spot, though her eyes did soften a little.
Marinette nodded, still pacing. "Yes…"
"Just be yourself!"
Myself?" she repeated. "I can't just be myself! Myself is complete moron! Myself is clumsy and ridiculous and overthinks and just isn't right!"
Marinette stopped as she realised what she had said. She looked at the bag on her desk. It wasn't right either. The bear was too perfect, too manufactured. It was what the shops sold. It was merchandise she happened to make, not something she had created. And the letter was just...nonsense. It was vague, vapid nothing. It was just words that sounded sort of poetic but really held nothing of value.
Nothing was...right.
"This...this isn't right," she murmured.
No wonder her daydreams wouldn't play anymore; no wonder her plans had all gone wrong; no wonder even the thought of confessing had made her feel sick instead of butterflies. It wasn't right.
"Don't you love him anymore?" Tikki asked.
Marinette swallowed thickly. Love? Was that really how she'd described this sickly, dominating obsession? Love. It had once sounded normal in her mind, in her heart. But now, when she said the phrase 'I love you, Adrien' in her head, it sounded...wrong.
"No," she said.
Something snapped. Like there had been an iron band around her heart that suddenly burst. Something light and warm and comfortable flooded her chest, extinguishing the nausea rearing in her stomach.
"No?" Tikki tilted her head to one side, brow furrowed.
"No," she whispered, then again with more confidence. "No, I don't love. I...think I did. Or maybe I fooled myself into thinking I did. Love shouldn't be about change, or trying to be perfect. It should be about growth and...since I started loving him, I haven't grown. You're right; I should be myself. And if myself isn't right for him then I shouldn't change that. So no, I don't love him. Not anymore, and maybe I never did."
The warm, light feeling spread up her throat and into her head, down her arms and legs, to the tips of her toes and fingers, bubbling under her skin. She felt like she could fly; not as Ladybug but as herself.
"I'm proud of you, Marinette," Tikki said, her face crumpled around her wide smile. "That's not an easy thing to admit. But what are you going to do about that?" She pointed at the bag of gifts.
Marinette checked her phone; twenty minutes before she had to leave.
Just enough time.
First, she extracted the box of kisses. She fished out several smaller paper bags and poured an equal amount into each, tying them shut with another piece of ribbon. Then, she grabbed several large labels.
Alya, she wrote on one side with her nicest pen, and on the reverse: I love you for your bravery.
Using her previous lists and love notes, she wrote a label for each of her friends, including Adrien:
Adrien,
I love you for being a good friend.
And Luka:
Luka,
I love you (she paused at this as the weird uncomfortable sadness gnawed again at the back of her heart, and distracted herself reading through his list for the best word but couldn't narrow it down to just one) for being you.
Then she placed the bags back into the box for safe keeping and slid it into her back. Next she found a notecard and in her best handwriting wrote: Happy Valentine's Day!
She propped the notecard in between the bear's paws. Swinging her bag onto her back, Marinette grabbed the bear and hurried downstairs. She put the bear on the bakery counter as a little bit of Valentine's Day decoration. After planting a kiss on her maman's cheek, she ran out the front door into the chilly day.
Her scarf fluttered around her neck in the breeze, and the long, pink skirt she'd made for the occasion flapped around her legs like a cape. The pavement, edged with ice, glittered prettily beneath a clear sky and the sun blazed cold in the east.
A beautiful day to celebrate love.
So what if it was the love of her friends she was celebrating.
For the first time since meeting Adrien, she finally had a Valentine's Day where she felt...happy. Not nervous or scared or antsy. Happy. Happy and free.
She was smiling stupidly by the time she reached her classroom. With ten minutes to spare, she opened up her box and distributed little bags of chocolate onto her friends' desks then sat down to wait patiently for them to arrive.
Rose appeared first, wearing a bright pink headband adorned with glittery hearts. "Ooh, Marinette! This is so cute!" she enthused as soon as she spotted the little gift. "Aww, I love you too!"
Alya arrived shortly after. "These are amazing!" she sighed, digging into hers straight away. Not unusual—if she brought sweets home they would soon be scoffed by her sisters. "Ooh, is that one for Adrien?"
Marinette nodded, ignoring the suggestive smirk on Alya's face. "Mmhmm."
Rose suddenly gasped. "Ooh, here he comes!" She rushed back to her desk where she sat on the edge of her seat, bubbling with excitement. She, Alya, and Marinette watched Adrien sit down, notice the little bag, and read the label. It took him a second to work out who it was from, but when he realised it turned in his chair with a winning smile.
"Thanks, Marinette. These look great!"
"Thanks, I hope you like them," she replied easily.
No stutter! Just a missed beat of her heart then...nothing.
Alya deflated next to her. "Is that it?" she hissed, leaning closer to Marinette. "What did you write on his card?"
"I said I loved him-"
"Good."
"-for being a good friend."
"Marinette!" Alya moaned, shaking her head. "You can't reinforce the friendship stuff, or he'll never realise the love stuff! Did you get him something else? What about that teddy bear you showed me, and wasn't there a letter?"
Marinette grinned. "Nope," she said, loving the way it sounded. Nope, nada, nothing. Just friendship chocolates. No pressure, no worry.
"Why not?"
"It wasn't right," she said, shrugging.
