AN: Note that I do not own Naruto, Naruto Shippuden, or any of the characters from either Anime. This work is a fanfiction written out of my love for the series and not in any attempt to make a profit.
Proofread by: Author
This chapter is a few hours late because I just ended up taking an entire day off from writing. Very relaxing, although I don't know if it helped as much as I thought it did back then. So, apologies for that. For now, this chapter also lacks the careful critique usually left by Kyluxia, something I hope will change within a day or two.
Now then, let's see what Jiraiya and the clone have to say in this chapter. I originally hoped to reach another topic, but in the end, couldn't fit it into this chapter. We'll have to wait until next time. Enjoy.
Chapter 20: Yet to be experienced past
Confronting Jiraiya, as it turned out, wasn't as climatic as Sakura had expected. Jiraiya had simply shrugged off her demand to know what he did to their clone, telling them to just wait until it awoke and told them, or expired naturally so they would get its memories. Apparently, they had gotten into a very serious discussion that Jiraiya wasn't willing to resume without resupplying his sake first.
Sakura didn't like having her worries and concerns dismissed like that, but considering Jiraiya's state at that moment, she wasn't willing to push the issue when Jiraiya was in an obviously bad mood from his hangover.
As a result, the Haruno twins had to settle for waiting for their clone to wake up and help them summon Fezā before they could find out about whatever memories the clone had in store for them. There was always the alternative of asking Jiraiya to help supply some of the chakra for the summoning, but it would be a bit of a waste, and dispelling the clone would result in them receiving too much chakra unless they got rid of some of theirs. Considering Jiraiya was hungover, Sakura didn't trust his chakra control, and Heikō agreed it would be better to just perform the summoning themselves using the clone. Provided the clone wasn't hungover as well, which they severely hoped it wasn't.
While waiting for Naruto and the clone to wake up, Jiraiya tasked them with beginning to pack up the camp. It didn't take long for Naruto to wake up and join them. Doing as much as they could until the clone awoke, Naruto sat down to read the latest book Jiraiya had given him. It wasn't until Sakura heard Naruto shout, that she realized what it was he was reading.
"What the hell is this old man?!" Naruto demanded to know, loudly, causing Jiraiya to glare at him, cringing at the volume.
"No need to be so loud, kid," Jiraiya told him, before sighing and glancing over at Sakura, before shaking his head. "I already had this discussion with Sakura's clone yesterday. She'll explain everything as soon as she's awake, which, if I'm not mistaken, would be soon, considering how loud you were." Jiraiya informed Naruto. True to his words, Sakura and Heikō could feel their clone stirring in their tent.
Naruto, probably not thinking too much about it, immediately headed for their tent. Thankfully, Sakura acted in time to stop him by stepping in his path. "Naruto! Calm down! They're awake, just give them time to come out and explain everything." She told him, thankful that Naruto listened to her, even if he didn't look all that happy, only to suddenly blush and avoid looking at her.
Blinking in surprise, Sakura couldn't help but draw parallels to the last time Naruto behaved like that, which had been when he'd seen them naked. Looking behind herself to confirm that their clone hadn't decided to step out of the tent naked, she was relieved to see that hadn't been the case. Trying to figure out what had happened, she instead turned an inquisitive gaze towards Jiraiya, who simply sighed and shook his head at them.
Annoyed, but aware that answers weren't too far away, Sakura relented and instead waited for their clone to get dressed and leave the tent.
Not having to wait long, all three occupants of the camp turned to look at the clone as it left the tent. Seeing everyone looking at it, the clone looked like a spooked deer for a moment, before looking at its original questioningly. Sakura couldn't help but look over at Naruto. "Does this happen often to you?" She asked, getting a confused look from Naruto since he wasn't certain as to what she meant. Lifting one arm to gesture at her clone, Sakura explained. "I mean, both you and your clone looking to each other for different answers?" She inquired. Naruto shook his head.
"No, I don't think I've ever had any of my clones around long enough for it to come up," Naruto admitted.
"It's actually pretty amusing." The clone told them, drawing everyone's attention back to it before Sakura sighed and decided just to get it all over with.
"Right, well we're all waiting for you to tell us what the hell happened for you to wake us all up in the middle of the night. Naruto had the same reaction not too long ago, and all I know is that for some reason, you and Jiraiya ended up drinking." Sakura explained, deciding to omit the slightly worrying point that the clone had been naked, although it might have been Heikō's fault, just like it had been last time.
"Oh, that." The clone remarked, frowning, before sighing and sitting down on one of the nearby logs. "I suppose Naruto already has an idea then what this is all about." The clone reasoned, getting a miffed nod from Naruto before he cast an annoyed look at Jiraiya, who held his hands up, got up, and decided to leave.
Before anyone could ask him where he was going, he decided to answer them all instead. "I already had this conversation yesterday, I don't want to reawaken those memories again so soon, especially without sake or booze nearby." He explained before he left.
"Asshole." The clone voiced its opinion, surprising its original and Naruto. "So, I guess I should explain everything, do you at least know what it is that Naruto just read?" The clone asked it's original.
Shaking her head, Sakura saw the clone sigh, before it stood up and walked up to Naruto. "The book?" She asked, holding out a hand for it. Nodding, Naruto handed the book over.
Flipping through it for a few moments, until it found the right chapter and page, the clone cleared its throat before reading straight from the book.
"With the earlier explanation of puberty and the effects they may have on adolescent Shinobi, it stands to reason that there will be times where there won't be any options but to resort to the most basic of means to deal with the accumulated lust. Naturally, this is considered to be masturbation. However, sometimes, such simple methods are not enough, especially when one has accumulated a lot of stress and has little time to relieve themselves."
"As such, the much more effective method to solve these issues is to instead have sex with one of your teammates. Regardless of gender preferences or-" The clone read, only to be interrupted by Sakura.
"What?!" Sakura shrieked, causing Naruto and the clone both to wince, while Sakura stared at the clone in disbelief.
"Yes, you heard that right. There's a bit more, and admittedly, the way they mention it in this book is very poorly thought out. If you keep reading, they go into more detail and-" The clone began, only for Sakura to cut the clone off again.
"I don't care about details! The book is telling me to have sex with Naruto!" Sakura explained, scandalized, only for her outrage to disappear when she noticed Naruto's hurt expression in the corner of her field of vision. "No offense Naruto, but I'm not ready for sex, especially with a friend because a book said so!" Sakura tried to run damage control.
"Uh, yeah, I understand. I feel the same way." Naruto assured her, giving her a smile, and Sakura sincerely hoped he hadn't taken it the wrong way and was merely pretending for her sake.
"I really hope you didn't just screw this up for us. I wanted to consult Hinata first to be sure, but it actually sounds fun." Heikō commented, only to shut up as Sakura sent a wave of rage through their mindscape at her sister.
"Wow, it's really bizarre seeing yourself like this from the outside. Sorry, Naruto." The clone told him, as it shook its head in disbelief. "Right, well that's enough of that. Shut up, sit down and listen. Jiraiya explained this to us, and now we will explain it to you two. Honestly, I'd prefer him to be here and make sure we don't miss anything, but I suppose we can't go wrong if we tell you everything word for word, so here it is." The clone told them, before retelling Jiraiya's explanation, pointing out the time period the book was written in, and what the purpose of the suggestion was, and what for.
By the end of the explanation, Naruto was looking green, while Sakura was looking pale.
"That's about it. I strongly suggest you keep reading the book, we managed to finish the chapter before we got too drunk to continue, so we'll need it back later." The clone informed him, giving him the book back, before turning towards Sakura.
"Anything else we need to do before we dispel?" The clone asked, waiting for a moment as Sakura collected herself.
"Um, yeah. We need to summon Fezā." Sakura pointed out. Nodding, the clone offered Sakura a hand.
Grabbing the offered hand, Sakura pulled herself up to her feet, while Naruto hesitantly resumed reading the book. Stepping behind the original, the clone put a hand on her back before reaching out with its chakra for Sakura to direct into the summoning Technique. Forming the hand-seals for the summoning technique, Sakura summoned Fezā in a cloud of smoke.
"Oh, I was wondering if I would be summoned today. You took a bit longer than usual." Fezā said in surprise as she appeared, along with the Gochi twins. The extra chakra it had taken to summon them, resulted in the clone dispersing, and Sakura blushing as she gained the clone's memories. While nowhere near the worst-case scenario, suddenly remembering how their clone had tried to deal with the hormones on its own during its inebriation, wasn't something either Sakura or Heikō had expected.
"Oh dear, are you alright?" Fezā asked, concerned at the sight of Sakura turning completely red-faced. Curious, Naruto looked up from his book, a bit confused at the sight. In his opinion, Fezā had managed to be modestly dressed this time around, so there was nothing for Sakura to be embarrassed about.
"We're fine," Sakura assured Fezā, shaking her head, while Naruto just shrugged and went back to reading his book.
"You know, from those memories, we now know what Fukō made us drink," Heikō noted, resulting in Sakura grimacing.
"You don't look fine." The blue-eyed Gochi remarked, seeing Sakura grimace.
"We are. Just processing some of our clone's memories. It decided to see how well we handle sake." Sakura explained, not willing to disclose the rest of their clone's activities.
"Oh, our mom always told us not to drink alcohol. Is it really that bad?" Gochi questioned, making her twin sister snicker, while Sakura considered how to approach the topic in the best way. She knew Gochi was smart, but even so, she did not want to mess up. In an attempt to get some help, she looked at Fezā, who thankfully, nodded in understanding, before turning to Gochi.
"Well, alcohol in itself isn't bad." Fezā began. "However, it is considered a type of poison, as well as an acceptable, and sometimes even expected it to be present at certain events, like celebrations or ceremonies. It also acts as a disinfectant, due to how it tends to kill germs, making it something used in medicine to clean or sterilize wounds and equipment. When drinking alcoholic beverages, it is important to be aware of how much you can ingest without being affected, or poisoned yourself." Fezā explained calmly, and Gochi seemed to consider her words for a long while.
Sakura was just glad that she didn't have to explain it herself. She doubted she could have done so, sounding as professional and unbiased as Fezā had managed. She hadn't even considered pointing out the medical uses of alcohol, just saying that it was a bad thing to drink. Fezā's explanation actually had her reconsidering her view on alcohol. According to the clone's memories, she did have a decent tolerance towards alcohol apparently.
AN: Funny thing. I consider the Shadow clones to be anatomically correct down to an atomic level. I mean, they have to be to properly emulate mass and allow for all the cells within the body to function properly. This means clones can get drunk, as well as experience stomach pains as a result of having drunk expired milk, having been poisoned, or experiencing the miracle that is dreams.
I don't know whoever might have considered it besides myself, but theoretically, if sustained for long enough, a Shadow clone should be capable of sustaining itself, indefinitely. Ever heard about people saying that every ten years, the body has replaced every single cell in your body? While I'm not certain that would be the case with a clone, I believe that enough actual mass would eventually incorporate itself into a sustained clone, allowing real, actually living cells to be produced in their entirety. This would provide the clone with a way to produce its own Physical energy, as well as natural energy. Once enough cells have been created, the clone should become able to mold its own chakra, sustaining itself, as well as the parts of its biology that haven't, or can't properly be replaced with the matter they ingest.
Orochimaru really missed this interesting little possibility of technical immortality. After all, any shadow clones that are dispelled, give their memory not just to the original, but also any active clones. And an active clone can create more shadow clones. Therefore, even if the original is dead, they can live on through their clones. Possibly. It would depend if a clone that has become "real" would die upon the original doing so.
Time-traveling Kyluxia: Kyluxia here, with your post-future note! While not too much happens in this chapter, the devil is in the details. Two-thirds of our merry band have increased their mental fortitude when dealing with more, adult topics, and who doesn't love some good old-fashioned, unintended, teenage rejection? Until next time.
