A/N: This was written for the Snape Bang 2020! Big thanks to the modmins at Snape Bang for hosting this fest! This would not be a fic if I hadn't had lots of help. First of all Vino Amore gave me the plot bunny for this one, thank you, my dear! Ravenpufflove, UrsulaHood, and Silver Lioness all spent some time beta'ing this story. Thank you lovelies!
This was originally posted to AO3 and I'm just now getting around to cross-posting it here. Also, I know there is a plot hole about Severus's parents... whoops. Sorry about that.
LunaP999 created a gorgeous piece of artwork to go along with this. Find it on her Tumblr lunap999!
If you liked this (or hated it) let me know about it in a review! You can find me on Tumblr at crochetawayhpff or Facebook at Shan Crochetaway. Enjoy!
Chapter 4: Dark Eyes
1 November 1998
Regulus sat with Severus as he processed everything he had been told. It was a lot, almost too much, but Regulus promised to help as much as he could. He assured Severus that he could still be a Slytherin and he wasn't going to let McGonagall resort him. After several long moments, when Severus felt that he had composed himself as much as he possibly could, Regulus lifted his wand and sent a Patronus.
"Can you teach me that?" Severus asked as the pearly white Thestral disappeared.
"Sure, it's not something everyone can do. They say that marked Death Eaters can't produce one, but…" Regulus trailed off and let a small chuckle loose. "There are lots of terrible, not true rumors going around about the marked Death Eaters."
"How did you avoid Azkaban?" Severus asked.
Regulus chuckled again. "Dumbledore, of course. The man was manipulative to the point of being a complete narcissist, but he did provide for his own. When it benefited him at least. I'm lucky that it benefited him that I stayed out of Azkaban, even if he was dead. My brother wasn't so lucky."
Severus gave him a confused look, but Regulus shook his head. "That's a story for another time. Here comes the headmistress and Miss Granger."
Sure enough, the stairs leading to the office began grinding upward, and a moment later both witches appeared in the doorway. McGonagall still looked as stern as ever, and Granger gave Severus a small smile. Severus couldn't quite return it, but he did manage a nod.
Was it possible that Granger was his heart's desire? That didn't seem likely since he had never met her prior to today, but why else would the ritual have brought him so far into the future?
Or was living without the threat of the Dark Lord his heart's desire? That also didn't quite seem right. Prior to tonight, he had been excited to join the Dark Lord and the Death Eaters. Hearing some of what Regulus had experienced through the two wars had cooled his desire quite a bit. While he might be a little relieved that there wasn't a Dark Lord in this strange future; he didn't think that was his heart's desire.
So why had he gone forward in time?
"We'll need to inform the Ministry," Headmistress McGonagall was saying when Severus started paying attention to the conversation going on around him. "I'm not sure we've ever had a case like this happen before, but surely the Department of Mysteries has a protocol for occurrences such as this. I'll take care of that."
"Tell them to consult me if they have any questions," Regulus said imperiously. As the last of the Blacks perhaps he had more sway than most would have with the Ministry.
"I still think we ought to have Mr Snape sorted again," McGonagall said and Severus grimaced. He absolutely did not want that bloody hat in his head when he was already dealing with so much and was so confused. He started to shake his head, but Regulus stepped in again.
"Absolutely not. He's a Slytherin. We have the room to house him so we will. We can have Malfoy look after him, and I will take care of any expenses he incurs." Severus flushed at the reminder that he was essentially a penniless orphan. Even if his parents had died with any money, surely it would be long gone by now. Granger was looking at him curiously, so he ducked his head, allowing his hair to swing forward and hide most of his face from view.
"Malfoy?" Granger asked. The only Malfoy Severus knew was Lucius, so this other one must be his son.
"He needs something to occupy his time since he can't play Quidditch," Regulus replied. "It'll be good for him."
Severus's eyes darted between Granger and Regulus, trying to figure out the undercurrent that was at play. Granger looked unimpressed with Regulus's choice and Severus wondered what Malfoy did to get himself banned from playing Quidditch.
"If there's nothing else, Headmistress? I believe it's been quite a long day for everyone," Regulus glanced pointedly at the clock behind the headmistress's desk that was now pointing perilously close to one in the morning.
"Of course, yes, we should all be getting to bed. Luckily for all of us, tomorrow is Sunday and we can still attempt to have some semblance of a normal night's sleep," McGonagall said dismissively.
Regulus bid Granger and the Headmistress both goodnight before heading toward the staircase. "Come along, Severus," he said over his shoulder.
Before hurrying after his former friend, Severus gave one last look at Granger, his emotions were all over the place, but his heart felt a little lighter when she offered him a small smile.
"This is weird," Severus said as Regulus led the way to the Slytherin common room.
"You're telling me," Regulus said with a slight chuckle. "My long lost friend just showed up and is now twenty years my junior. I suspect you want to know a bit about Malfoy?"
Severus nodded. "Lucius's son, I assume?"
"Correct. Also, the youngest marked Death Eater in history. Draco even had me beat," he chuckled ruefully.
Severus winced. "Is that why he can't play Quidditch?"
"Attending Hogwarts this year is part of his sentencing," Regulus said as they exited the Entrance Hall and began their descent into the dungeons. "Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger actually should have both left Hogwarts last year. But the war interrupted everything. Granger didn't even get to attend, as a Muggle-born she was banned from doing so. Draco's Death Eater duties kept him busy enough, and his overwhelming guilt for his part in Dumbledore's death meant he failed most of his classes. As my cousin, he was placed under my care at Hogwarts while his parents serve out their sentences. Lucius's in Azkaban and Narcissa's at home. There's…." Regulus trailed off and shook his head. "Far too much to explain tonight. I'll find some good newspaper accounts on the aftermath of the war that will explain everything better than I can."
Severus swallowed hard. There was so much he missed. So much he was never going to be able to understand about this world. "Thank you," he said quietly. "You don't have to help me, but I appreciate that you are."
"Frankly, I'm so damned relieved to see you alive, that I'm more than happy to help," Regulus said, placing a warm, solid hand on Severus's shoulder. They stood in front of the blank wall that guarded the Slytherin common room. "The password is 'adder.'" The wall slid aside and both of them strode into the empty common room.
10 November 1998
Severus didn't find classes in 1998 any more difficult than they had been in the 70s, thankfully. It was easy for him to slide right back into his routine from just a few days prior. While 1998 was different from the 70s, there were some obvious benefits to moving so far forward in time. For starters, the Marauders were no longer around to make his life miserable and there didn't seem to be a modern equivalent. He was increasingly grateful to have a reprieve from looking over his shoulder in anticipation of an oncoming attack. It also meant that he had much more time to observe his fellow students and try and sort out the pecking order.
Though, with the recent war, it seemed there was no true hierarchy amongst the students. Or at least not one that Severus could figure out. It seemed that prior to the war Malfoy had been on top of the pecking order, but now, he kept his head down and avoided as many of the students as he possibly could, except the one student that Severus also found himself watching. Granger... Hermione. The only other eighth year besides Malfoy.
Severus caught Hermione looking over at him almost as often as he found his gaze wandering to her. He supposed he must be as interesting to her as she was to him.
Why had the ritual brought him forward in time? Why had it brought him to her dormitory? Was it the seventh year Gryffindor girls dormitory it was bringing him to? Or was it to Granger specifically?
There were too many unanswered questions and Severus found himself too bogged down in schoolwork to go looking for any of the answers. No matter how desperately he wanted answers and yet… there was part of him that was afraid to find them.
What would it mean if Lily wasn't his heart's desire? Just thinking about her still brought a stinging to the back of his eyes and a lump to his throat. How could Lily be dead? How could so many people he had gone to school with be dead? It seemed inconceivable, and yet, here he was in the future, living in a world where the Dark Lord didn't triumph.
Yet another thing he was having trouble reconciling. In 1977 he and Regulus had been itching to join the Death Eaters back in 1977 and now Regulus talked long and often about his work for the Order of the Phoenix in the fights against the Dark Lord. Severus had yet to drum up the courage to ask him why he had switched sides. He didn't think Regulus was necessarily wrong in his desertion of the Dark Lord. After all, it now seemed clear, that the Dark Lord was a little unhinged. A week after learning about the Horcruxes, Severus still felt vaguely ill by the severity of it all. Especially after the most recent revelations. Who on earth would ever think to make a Horcrux, let alone seven?
He could see why Regulus would have changed sides, but it begged the question: would Severus have made the same choice if fate hadn't seen fit to fling him into the future? He didn't know, and that was what was bothering him.
He wasn't stupid. As a half-blood, it had always irked him that the only way to seemingly claw back any power in the wizarding world was to follow someone obsessed with the purity of blood, but Severus had been willing to do it. If it meant he was going to have power, going to have powerful friends, he had been willing to do anything.
But then he thought about Granger. Brilliant Hermione who knew the answer in every class, but didn't flaunt it. Who went out of her way to help anyone who needed it. Who had even asked after him the first few days until he had given her a thorough brushing off. She was a Muggle-born—like Lily was—and under the Dark Lord, she would have been targeted. Merlin, she was targeted. Regulus had informed him of just that, she hadn't been allowed to attend her final year of Hogwarts due to her blood status.
So, he could admit to himself that he didn't like the Dark Lord's blood purity stance, but did that mean he would have ended up switching sides like Regulus had? Would he have become a member of the Order? The fact that he wasn't sure, made him uneasy. That unease was what led him to brushing off Granger's friendly overtures, despite the fact that he was hard pressed to keep his eyes off of her when they were in the same room.
After continuously brushing her off for the first week, Severus had thought he had scared her away for good, but then… then she had taken to sitting at his table in the library. It didn't matter which table he sat at. Inevitably, she found him and joined him. This should have infuriated him. And perhaps, had it been anyone else it would have, but she was quiet, studious, and never spoke to him. Hermione just sat with him and worked on her homework.
It didn't take long for Malfoy to figure out what was happening and begin joining them. Malfoy's adoration of Granger was painfully obvious to Severus, and yet Draco was unwilling to say anything to her about it to Hermione.
24 November 1998
It had taken most of the month for Severus's heart to stop aching as terribly as it had after he found out about Lily's death. He still found himself absolutely tearful if it was late at night and he was alone and thinking about her. How could his best friend be dead? It was so horrific, that he had trouble even processing it.
Watching Malfoy watch Granger only made matters worse. It was bad enough that Severus was confused over his connection with Hermione, but watching Malfoy watch her was… almost physically painful. He couldn't figure out if Hermione was completely oblivious to the glances or if she was ignoring them because she didn't know how to respond. He supposed it was possible that she was oblivious. She certainly wasn't exchanging looks with Malfoy. Maybe Severus only noticed it because he watched Hermione just as much as Malfoy did?
That was a disturbing thought. He'd lost his best friend to James Potter in the end, and now he found himself part of this strange trio. Hermione had never been his, but something had brought him forward in time and he had ended up in her dormitory. Not just in her dormitory, but standing right in front of her. If it was Granger who had brought him forward, he would have appeared wherever she was, right? Instead of concentrating on his potions homework, Severus chewed on the end of his quill as he pondered the mystery of his time traveling.
"What sources are you using for the essay on asphodel?" Malfoy asked him as he slid into the seat next to Severus. His eyes were on his bag, pulling out his books, though Severus could see that he kept carefully glancing at Granger who was sitting across from Severus.
"These three," Severus said, pushing the small stack over to his house mate. "I'm finished with them if you need to use them."
"Thanks, mate," Malfoy said, tossing him a solemn nod. "Did you finish your asphodel essay already, Granger?"
"Last week," she replied absentmindedly. Severus shook his head. He almost couldn't believe she was a Gryffindor. With her academic habits, she seemed more like a Ravenclaw.
That was the most conversation the three of them had ever had. Severus went back to his potions essay, proofreading it and moving a few paragraphs around. When he looked up several moments later, he found Hermione's dark eyes fixed on him. The moment he caught her gaze he darted his eyes away just as she offered him a small smile, but he missed her frown when he looked back at his essay. Taking out a fresh sheet of parchment, he began rewriting it.
28 November 1998
Hermione sat up fast, chest heaving, her breaths coming in fast pants, sweat dripping from her brow as she reassured herself that she was still in Gryffindor tower. Still in her bed, safe and sound. Not out in a strange forest watching a strange boy perform a strange ritual. This certainly wasn't her first time experiencing this dream, though this felt more real than the last. For the first time since the dreams began, Hermione was able to recognize that the boy sitting in the middle of the fairy circle was Severus. She had her suspicions since he arrived a month ago when the dreams began, but this time, she was sure it was him.
This one felt so real. She felt like she was right there, watching him prepare the ritual. Closing her eyes, she went over what she dreamed; she could smell the loam of the earth, feel the cool breeze on her skin. The moon filtered through the trees above them as Severus stepped inside the fairy circle. He was methodical as he went about preparing for the ritual. Then he sat down and began. Chanting in a language she didn't recognize, something Eastern European, but she wasn't sure which one. It was quick, as far as rituals went. He spoke the words, blew the sage, and then tossed the eye of newt over his shoulder. Then he disappeared.
That was the point Hermione always woke up. He disappeared and she assumed that was when he appeared in her dormitory.
Opening her eyes she checked the time to see that it was almost dawn. She sighed. These dreams were killing her sleep. She wished she could figure out what it meant that she kept dreaming of Severus. She wasn't even sure if the ritual she was dreaming of was real or if it was something her subconscious had created to justify his appearance. They certainly felt real, even as they left her disoriented and fuzzy-headed.
At least it was Saturday and a Hogsmeade weekend at that. She had searched for everything she could find on rituals in the Hogwarts library but hadn't found a book containing rituals in an Eastern European language. Maybe Tomes and Scrolls in Hogsmeade would have something.
She shook her head. As much as she wanted to figure out what was going on with Severus, she was equally sick of mysteries. Hermione would love nothing more than to have one normal year at school: one year where there were no mysteries to figure out. No strange dreams. Nothing but schoolwork.
Besides, why did she have to be the one to figure out the mystery? Just because he appeared in her dormitory?
Hermione twisted her lips and tried to put Severus out of her mind. It was a Hogsmeade weekend, she was caught up on her schoolwork, and it wasn't snowing. So she was determined to enjoy the day with Ginny and not worry about school work, or strange dreams, or mysterious boys who just appeared in dormitories. She could do it.
She would do it.
After breakfast Hermione and Ginny made their way down to the Entrance Hall together, bound for Hogsmeade. With neither Harry nor Ron at Hogwarts, Ginny really clung to Hermione and truth be told Hermione didn't mind. The war had left Ginny a bit fragile on her own. The disastrous year with the Carrows was nightmare-inducing all on its own, but coupled with Fred's death, Ginny was far less like herself this year. All of the Weasleys were a little less prone to laughter this year.
Hermione had been glad to come back to Hogwarts without the boys. After living with them in a tent for the better part of a year, she was ready to have some of her own space again. Even sharing a dormitory with Ginny was quite a bit different than living in a tent with two boys. At least they were better fed at Hogwarts. Hermione was sure that a lot of her frustrations and irritability with Harry and Ron last year had a lot to do with not having enough to eat. It was far easier to live with Ginny in the comfort that was Hogwarts than it had been with the boys on the run.
"You look brooding," Ginny said quietly as they exited the castle and ventured down the path toward the small village. Students streamed around them as they strolled slowly, their arms linked together. It was a gorgeous day for late November, warmer than it had been recently, and the sun was out and shining, almost no breeze. Probably one of the last truly beautiful days of the year.
"Just thinking about how different this year is to the last," Hermione said just as quietly. "It's strange, and maybe not quite good, but…" she sighed aloud, " I'm not sure of the word." She shook her head, trying to put into words all of the emotions she was feeling.
"Restful?" Ginny suggested. "This year feels restful. Like after you've had a good long cry. You're still upset, your heart and chest still hurt, but there's something cleansing about it."
Hermione thought for a moment. "Yeah, that's exactly what it's like." She squeezed Ginny's arm. "Restful. Let's keep it that way, yeah?"
"As long as no more strange boys show up in our dormitory," Ginny replied, sending Hermione a small smirk. "I see the way you watch him."
Hermione sighed. "It's not my fault. I don't want any mysteries to solve this year."
"And yet…" Ginny trailed off.
"Mind if we stop in Tomes and Scrolls?" Hermione asked. Ginny laughed, shaking her head.
"Let's start at the far end of the street, shall we?" Ginny suggested as they entered the village proper. Hermione nodded. She preferred to start at the far end too and work her way back toward the castle. Tomes and Scrolls happened to be one of the first shops when entering Hogsmeade from Hogwarts, so it meant they definitely wouldn't miss it coming back.
They spent the day, going in and out of various shops, looking for Christmas presents for their friends and family. At lunchtime, they headed to the Three Broomsticks for some stew and a couple of butterbeers. A few of the other seventh year's were also in the pub and they spent a laughter-filled hour with them. It felt good to be out of the castle. As much as Hogwarts felt like home, it was also a place where a lot of terrible things had happened.
By the time they had reached Tomes and Scrolls and Quality Quidditch Supplies, Hermione had found something for almost everyone on her list. She was feeling like she had accomplished a lot.
"You've got thirty minutes, Granger," Ginny said with a small smile as she headed into Quality Quidditch Supplies. "Don't make me drag you out of there."
Hermione offered her a salute and laughed as she pulled open the door of the small bookstore. She waved to the proprietor and headed toward the back where she knew the esoteric magic books were kept. It was a small section, but also not a shelf that Hermione was very well-versed in. She planned to look at every book on it. Hopefully, it would yield something, but if not, she could always head to Flourish and Blotts over Christmas holidays.
Dimly, she heard the shop door tinkled as she looked through her third book. It was on rituals, but none of them were in a Slavic language. She put the book back on the shelf and was going to grab the next when the sound of a boot scraping the floor caught her attention. Looking up, she found Severus standing at the end of the aisle, staring at her. When their eyes met, his widened and he let loose a choked gasp. Then he turned on his heel and fled.
Hermione shoved the book back onto the shelf and made a snap decision, hurrying after him. She had tried to get him used to her presence by sitting with him in the library, hoping that he would open up to her, but he didn't. And every time their eyes met, he looked away. She was sick of him ignoring her so thoroughly, and she wanted answers. He was the one to show up in her dormitory. He had to know something.
"Severus, wait up!" she shouted after him as he hurried out of the shop.
The moment he got to the street outside, he lifted his shoulders to his ears and shoved his hands in his pockets, hurrying back toward the castle. She caught up with him just on the outskirts of Hogsmeade. Hermione grabbed his arm, forcing him to stop and when he didn't turn to face her, she moved so she was standing between him and Hogwarts.
"What is the deal?" she asked, trying to get him to meet her eye, but he wouldn't. He looked at their feet instead.
He opened his mouth to say something, but then shook his head and closed it. He tried again, and again nothing came out.
Hermione pulled her hand off of his arm and crossed her arms over her chest as she waited for him to speak. After a long moment he mumbled, "You're not what I expected. I must have miscalculated something."
"With your ritual?" Hermione asked. "What ritual was it again?"
Severus shook his head, refusing to explain. "It doesn't concern you," he said, coldly, finally dragging his gaze up to hers.
"Actually, it does," Hermione snapped, still tired from the night's interrupted sleep. "Whatever you did affected me too."
Severus stared at her in shock, confusion swirling in his dark eyes. He shook his head like he didn't believe what she was saying. Then he brushed by her, hitting her shoulder hard and by the time Hermione got herself turned around, he was sprinting off toward the castle. She watched him go, half infuriated with herself for confronting him and half confused by his reaction.
She already knew that the ritual had gone wrong, but it seemed like maybe Severus was also struggling to figure out how and why it went wrong. Perhaps he too, felt this strange connection between them.
She rubbed her aching chest with the palm of her hand and turned to go back to Hogsmeade.
Ginny was standing outside of Tomes and Scrolls by the time Hermione made it back to Hogsmeade proper.
"There you are," she said, sounding half-exasperated and half-worried. "You weren't in the bookstore, I wasn't sure where you went."
"Sorry," Hermione said. "I ran into Severus, and well…" she trailed off, shaking her head, "it doesn't matter. I'd actually like a bit more time at Tomes and Scrolls, if that's okay? I didn't get as far as I'd like."
Ginny raised an eyebrow. "It's fine. I'm tired though, I'm going to head back up."
"Alright." Hermione gave her a little wave and headed back into the bookstore, more determined than ever to figure out the ritual Severus had performed.
It was a few hours later before she completed looking through all of the books on esoteric magics that Tomes and Scrolls had. She hadn't found a single one with any sort of Slavic in it whatsoever. Sighing, she rubbed the back of her neck and headed out of the store for the second time that day.
"Didn't find what you were looking for, dearie?" the proprietor asked.
Hermione shook her head. "Not unless you have any books on ritual magic with spells in a Slavic language."
"I'm afraid not," she said, shaking her head. "I can order something, if you have a title and author."
She smiled at the older woman. "If I find one, I'll do that," she assured her. After wishing her a goodnight, she left the bookstore to see that it was dusk. If she didn't hurry, she was going to miss dinner entirely.
"Alright, Granger?" a posh voice said behind her. She whirled around to find Malfoy holding several shopping bags and looking at her carefully. He always looked at her carefully these days, and she wasn't sure what that meant.
"Yeah," Hermione said, offering him a smile. "Heading back to the castle?"
Malfoy nodded and fell into step beside her. "Did you get all your holiday shopping complete?" He indicated the bags she was holding.
"I did," she said. "It feels good getting it done so far ahead of time. Did you?"
He nodded. "My list isn't large, just my parents really. Makes it easy, I suppose."
"No friends to buy for?" Hermione asked, thinking about Pansy Parkinson.
Draco laughed bitterly and shook his head. "Not many friends these days, Granger. People generally don't want to associate with Death Eaters."
"Former Death Eaters," Hermione replied back, bumping his shoulder with her own. "I spoke at your trial, remember? You were truly remorseful."
"I know," Malfoy said quietly, face going serious. "Thank you. I know I thanked you then, but I was still in a bit of shell-shock. I'm not sure I would be a free man had you not spoken up for me."
Hermione shrugged. "It was the right thing to do. You were a kid put in terrible circumstances as much as the rest of us were."
Malfoy nodded. "This is a bloody depressing topic," he said, giving a little laugh. "Are you looking forward to the upcoming holidays?"
Hermione smiled and allowed him to change the subject. They each spoke of their Christmas plans the rest of the way back to the castle. Once they were in the Entrance Hall, Hermione was about to bid him farewell, when he spoke up.
"I'll walk you up to the tower," he said, offering her a tentative smile that showed a dimple she hadn't realized he had.
"Alright," she agreed, charmed by his old fashioned manners. They climbed the stairs in a fairly companionable silence.
"Thank you," she said to him once they were standing in front of the Fat Lady's portrait.
"It was my pleasure," he said, so sincere that Hermione easily believed him. "Would you like to study together sometime?" he asked.
Despite the specter of Severus's dark eyes dancing in her brain, Hermione found herself agreeing to studying with Malfoy with something like genuine pleasure. "Though I do usually sit at Severus's table."
"But he never joins yours," Malfoy pointed out. She huffed a small laugh, the corner of her mouth pulling up. He was right about that. She had made all the overtures toward Severus, not the other way around.
"It's a date," Malfoy said, giving her a small smirk after she conceded the point and agreed. "Have a good night, Granger," he said warmly.
Hermione found herself smiling absently as she entered the common room to stow her purchases before dinner.
