Chapter 21

Chuck paced impatiently as he waited for Landry to return home. He kept trying to suppress the anger he felt at seeing her kissing Carter, but the rage was too much.

When she finally walked through the door, he seethed through gritted teeth, "What the fuck were you thinking?"

She turned to him, outraged by his question. He had barely spoken three words to her in the past week, and he now had the audacity to speak to her in such a manner. Glaring at him with her hand on her hip, she held up her hand, "First, I suggest you take a deep breath and remember how to talk to me. Secondly, I don't know what the hell you are talking about because you haven't exactly been an open book lately."

Chuck raked his hands through his hair, in no mood to be met with her attitude. He held up his phone to show her the picture, "Don't deflect, Landry. What the hell were you doing with Carter Baizen?"

She stepped back for a moment, shocked by the photo. How had someone taken a picture of her without her knowledge and plastered it all over the internet? Her face dropped, and Chuck's expression softened slightly when he remembered that she was completely unaccustomed to the ways of the Upper East Side. He lifted her chin in his hand so that her eyes met his, and prodded again, "Why were you with him?"

She sighed and plopped onto the chair next to her, "Is it really any of your business who I see, Chuck?"

"While you're still my wife, yes, it's my fucking business," he growled.

She stood again and shoved past him, "Oh, that's rich coming from you."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

She scoffed and raised her voice slightly, "Are you really that oblivious to your own transgressions, Chuck? Or are you just that arrogant? You feel like you get a say in who I can date, but you can freely fuck another woman while you are still married to me?"

He stood stock still, staring at her, and she was afraid he was going to lose it. For several moments he said nothing, his jaw locked tightly and his fists clenching and unclenching against his thighs. Finally, he whispered, "You were the one who encouraged me to tell Blair how I felt."

"Tell her how you feel, sure," she whispered, "Because I want you to be happy, but I didn't expect you to jump in bed with her before we are even divorced - while we are still living together. Do you have any idea what it's like to hear another woman call out your husband's name?" The last part came out so quietly that it was barely perceptible. She quickly swept away the tear from her eye before it could fall, refusing to cry for the man who didn't give her feelings a second thought.

He started to approach her and stopped, dropping his gaze to the floor, "Landry, I- I didn't -"

"You didn't know that I love you? That I love you in the way that a wife is supposed to love her husband," she questioned. "Of course not because your vision was so clouded by her. You could only ever focus on her. You belonged to someone else before we ever met, so I never stood a real chance. I didn't want to fall in love with you, but I did."

It made so much sense now. When Landry used to tell him that she loved him, he always thought it was in the same way that he loved her - a love that developed out of mutual experience and respect, a love that resulted from a partnership that was based on trust and loyalty rather than romance. Now, looking into her eyes, threatening to spill treacherous tears that she hopelessly tried to keep at bay, he understood the truth, and he felt like he had been punched in the gut. "God, Landry, I -" he stammered, unsure of how to continue.

"Chuck, you don't need to say anything. I get it. I am not lying when I say that I am happy for you and Blair, but that doesn't make it hurt any less. You will never love me the way that I love you; I've come to terms with it. But please don't get in the way of my happiness now that you've found your own," her voice pleaded, and he desperately wanted to make things right.

He grabbed her hands and pulled her to sit beside him on the couch, "Landry, I'm so sorry for the pain that I've caused you. I love you, too. So much. Even if it's not in the same way," he swallowed, "in the same way that you love me. I want you to be happy. I would do anything to put your own happiness above my own, but you don't know Carter…"

Her heart swelled in her chest when he finally said those three words that he had never spoken to her. Maybe they didn't mean the same thing as when she said them, but she knew that he was being honest and sincere, so she tried to choke back her self-pity and offer him a reassuring smile, "Chuck, I will always be in your life in whatever capacity that you will allow. You'll get married, and -" she closed her eyes, -"have babies. I want to be there for it all, but I don't want to crowd your relationship, either. We've been it for each other for so long, that it's going to be hard, and different, and uncomfortable. We'll find a new way to be friends, best friends, but you can't protect me from the world any more." She looked up at him and squeezed his hand gently before continuing, "I know that you seem to have some kind of grudge against Carter, but are you sure that you still know him? From what I gather, you've changed a lot since you were eighteen-years-old; maybe he has, too. He was the perfect gentleman last night."

"You're right," Chuck relented, "I can't tell you who you can date, but please be careful with Carter. I don't trust him."

His mind immediately flashed back to a time in his life when he felt like he was losing Blair:

What are you doing with this insect?

Having the time of my life, thank you very much.

Blair, this guy -

What? Dishonest? Bad news? He can't be any worse than you.

I'm the one trying to help you.

Help me? Is that what you were doing at your little gentleman's club while my life was going up in flames? I'd rather take Carter's help.

"I'm a pretty good judge of character," Landry broke into his thoughts. "After all, I gave you a chance even when you were acting like a chauvinistic asshole."

He grumbled, "While I might have acted like a chauvinistic asshole, Carter is a chauvinistic asshole. He took advantage of -" he stopped when he realized what he was about to say.

"Blair?" She questioned. "It's okay; you can say her name."

He nodded, "He took advantage of her when she was in a particularly dark and vulnerable time in her life, and I don't want him to do the same to you."

"Blair was a teenager then," she assured him, "I'm a grown woman perfectly capable of seeing through people's bullshit. I think he really likes me."

Chuck groaned, "He really is an insect that is determined to stay in my life no matter how many times I squash him."

Landry chuckled and laid her head against his shoulder, "We're going to be okay, Chuck."

"Yeah," he whispered, kissing the top of her head, "we're going to be okay."

XOXO

Blair lay awake next to Louis, annoyed by the low hum of his breathing, a sound that used to comfort her but now only served to irritate her. She felt horrible for deceiving him, but she knew that she couldn't tell him the truth - that she had been coerced into marrying him by his evil, manipulative mother.

She peeked over her shoulder once again to make sure that he was in a deep sleep before texting Chuck.

Blair: I miss you.

Chuck: I miss you, too.

Blair: How are things?

Chuck: I'm not sure, tbh. Did you see the GG blast?

Blair cringed because she had hoped that he wouldn't see it: Yeah, I saw it. Carter, huh?

Chuck: Of all the men in New York, she seriously had to get caught up with him.

Blair felt a little jealousy start to rise in the pit of her stomach, which she realized was ridiculous after all they had been through, after his numerous confessions of love, after his impending divorce: Why does it matter who she dates?

Chuck: Are you serious? After the shit he pulled with you?

Blair breathed a sigh of relief as she remembered the dark time in her life all those years ago: You've been gone for a long time; if you will remember, you pulled a lot of shit like that, too. He's changed.

Chuck: How can you be so sure?

Blair: Just trust me. He really helped Serena with some stuff with her dad, and he did it selflessly.

Chuck: If you say so.

Blair rolled her eyes: You are literally the most stubborn person in the world.

Chuck: You wouldn't have me any other way.

Blair grinned: I suppose not. Time to get some sleep. I love you.

Chuck: Love you, too.

XOXO

Raina sighed with a low sob, "And that's how Bart Bass killed my mother."

Serena felt slightly guilty for getting Raina drunk and prompting her to spill her deepest, darkest secrets, but now she understood Raina's motive. "But why did you go to my ex-husband?" She asked with a look of disgust.

"I knew he was writing an ex...an expo…" Raina tried again, though her drunken mind was too hazy to form the word, "a story about the Basses, so I thought he might publish the story about the fire. When he said he was going to write about Chuckles...Charles...Chuck Bass," she hiccuped, "I didn't want anything to do with it. I just want to get justice for my mom's death, not ruin someone's life."

Serena shook her head and squeezed the girl's hand, "Listen to me, Raina. It's not what you think. Bart Bass didn't kill your mother. Let's sober you up and I'll tell you the real story."

Raina nodded with another sniffle, and Serena ordered a water and sandwich for the inconsolable girl beside her.

XOXO

The next morning, Chuck awoke to a loud squeal coming from the guest room. He jumped up and pulled his pajama pants on over his boxers and ran down the hallway to check on Landry.

He exhaled when he saw her sitting in front of her laptop with an astonished expression on her face, "What the hell was that all about?"

She looked up at him with the widest grin on her face, and said, "I did it. I hacked into the Gossip Girl server. All I need is her secondary password to get to the protected area of the site. She is apparently a stickler for security because every page requires a two-step authentication. I've got one part; I just need the other, and we are in."

XOXO

"Motherfucker!" Dan cursed, slamming his laptop shut. He had tried all morning to get into his Gossip Girl account to no avail.

Millie looked up at him with wide eyes, "What's mudderfu-"

"Don't say that," he cut her off softly, "Daddy's sorry. I shouldn't have said that word. It's not a very nice word."

He was beginning to grow panicky when he couldn't access the site. Did someone know that he was Gossip Girl, or was it like the time that Georgina stole access to his account for a short while? He needed to maintain his composure while his daughter was there, but he was running out of time.

He hesitantly dialed Serena's number, "Yeah, I know it's my day, but can you please take her for today? I'll get her tomorrow; it's urgent."

Serena reluctantly agreed to pick up her daughter, simply because she didn't want Millie to be present when her father was so clearly frustrated.

When Serena arrived at the Humphrey loft, she set about collecting Millie's belongings, appalled at the condition of the apartment. She knew that Dan, despite all of his misgivings, was a good father and would never do anything to intentionally hurt Millie, but she couldn't help but feel aggravated that he had fed their daughter stale pizza the night before. Normally, he was as conscientious about her nutrition as Serena was, if not more so, but something seemed to be weighing heavily on his mind lately.

Eyeing his laptop on the table, she quickly considered the morality of "borrowing" it for a few hours to help her brother. Ultimately she decided that it was no different than stealing and left it where it was, but not before gathering the scribbled notes she saw beside the computer and stuffing them into Millie's bag. Hey, she thought, I may have newly acquired morals since becoming a mom, but I'm still no saint.

A/N: I have managed to write three chapters today. That's a major accomplishment for me. Against my better judgment, I started a new Chair story today called The Inconvenience of Fate. It's a much lighter story than this one and Yours For the Taking. It's an AU story set during Blair's freshman year of college. Please check it out if you are so inclined. :)