Gwen's body is aching as she slides across the field away from Kevin.
She's been fighting with Kevin for the past hour, and she's in her head. She can't think straight, and she's been missing all her shots she's thrown at him. She's even fumbled one of her spells that she knows inside and out.
Kevin isn't keeping a usual banter with her either, he's unusually quiet today.
He's also going easy on her and it's pissing her off. He's barely gotten close to her and has only thrown long range attacks. He's acting like she'll break and it's frustrating her to no end. It's the only time he's held back when fighting and she's growing more agitated as they continue.
She just needs one good hit and she'll feel good about today. That's all she needs. She can do this on her own. She doesn't need a teacher and she can prove it.
She shakes her head and tries to clear her mind. The last thing she wants to think about right now is Verdona. Her brain feels muddy and she thinks she feels a migraine clustering in there too. She's unsure about a lot of things right now and it reads on her face.
She rubs the sweat from her brow and hunches over herself, she's taking quick breaths, almost hyperventilating.
She can do this; she doesn't need help.
"Gwen, really we can stop, you're not focused at all." Kevin shouts at her from where he is. He's making a sour face at her, but she doesn't care right now.
"No! I'm fine, I wanna keep going." She slurs out and starts a barrage of her mana projectiles toward him.
Kevin easily dodges the blue spheres that are sent towards him. He's not even sending attacks her way anymore.
"What are you trying to prove? You're exhausted!" He shouts at her. His jaw is tight and he's trying to hold back what he really wants to say to her. She knows she's making him angry, but she doesn't care right now.
It's not fair. It's not fair. It's not fair. It's not fair. It's not fair.
She just wants to fight on an equal playing field right now. She wants to be treated like a threat.
"I said I'm fine! I'm not stopping until I hit you or you knock me down Kevin. So, fight me!" She screams at him, her voice breaks and she slams her hands to the ground.
" Terra cavo " she whispers and her mana shoots into the ground aiming for Kevin.
A sink hole appears but Kevin uses his Kineceleran speed to dodge and runs towards Gwen.
She doesn't have any time to put up a shield or dodge before Kevin's on top of her and tackles her down.
He pins her down using his Vulpimancer arms to hold Gwen's wrist to the ground. He uses his Pyronite and Petrosapien arms to bear his weight above Gwen and he boxes her body under him.
She tries to pry herself out of his grip, but she's worn down and weak. She tries to focus her mana into her hands, but they just flicker blue quickly before fizzling out. She continues to writhe for a couple more minutes before she finally sinks her weight into the ground under her.
"I told you we should stop. What's your problem today?" Kevin asks her, his voice is firm as he looks down at her.
Gwen's head is turned to the side avoiding his gaze as she stares out at the empty field.
"You're my problem... you weren't treating me as an equal today!" She states and starts trying to squirm out of his grip again.
Kevin sighs before responding to her, "I don't think I'm the problem at all. You've been in your head this whole time." Gwen's body freezes and she continues to avoid his eyes.
"Seriously, you're avoiding my questions. I can stay like this all day; I'm not even trying hard to hold you here." He tells her in a clipped tone. She's starting to get under his skin and he's not leaving until she tells him what's up.
Gwen's feels her anger bubbling over, and she just wants to shout and scream until her lungs collapse.
Gwen's silent for a while and she squeezes her eyes shut. She just wants to fade into the ground and be swallowed up. She hates that Kevin knows somethings wrong. She hates that she feels so vulnerable right now. What she loathes the most is how much she wants the reassurance from Kevin. She shouldn't need it, but she wants it.
Minutes go by, and Kevin still holds her wrists to the dirt under them. She knows he's serious when he claims he can sit here all day waiting for her, so she takes a deep breath to calm herself and come down from her adrenaline high.
"Verdona wanted to talk to me today." She mutters out quietly.
She finally looks at Kevin, and his face is scrunched up in confusion.
She averts her eyes away again and realizes she has to elaborate for him.
"She wanted to train with me today, and I don't..." she pauses trying to find the right words. "I don't want to rely on her or Max for anything right now!" she whispers out in a broken voice.
"They lied about so much, not just to me but to Ben too and I-" her voice breaks off as she looks up at Kevin, her face crumpling under the weight of her own mixed emotions. "I don't know if I want to forgive them..."
Kevin's quiet for a minute as he tries to process what Gwen's saying before he finally responds to her.
"You know, you told us the other day that we can't change the past, that we have to move forward. Doesn't that include them too?" he asks her genuinely.
Gwen scoffs at that and rolls her eyes at him, "That's different-" she starts but Kevin interrupts her.
"No, it isn't Gwen. You don't get to tell us something like that and be a hypocrite when our backs are turned." He tells her, irritation crossing his face.
Gwen's face is flushed with embarrassment and her jaw is clenched.
Kevin sighs and sits up, letting go of Gwen. "I'm not saying you have to forgive them."
Gwen slowly sits up, her body aching from over exertion. She curls her legs up and presses her forehead to her knees. She's trying to not explode her emotional baggage all over Kevin. Her shoulders are hunched as she clings to her own body, trying to appear smaller.
She feels Kevin's hand, she thinks it's one of his Vulpimancer arms, pressing down softly and smooths her hair back. It's gentle and comforting.
"I'm just saying, you should give them a chance at earning forgiveness." Kevin mutters to her.
Silence comes over the two as they sit in the open field. Gwen thinks about what Kevin has said and she knows he's right.
She should at least talk to Verdona. It's not fair of her to make everyone else ask and atone for their past mistakes and not listen to the ones asking the same of her. She knows she's wrong. She's just too stubborn to want to admit it.
She's had her fair share of secrets as well; she hid her magic from Ken. The omission of truth was lying, and she knew that.
Maybe all the Tennyson's were wrong about one thing or another.
She pulls her head up and rests on top of her knees and stares at Kevin. He's sitting on the ground with her, just acting as a comforting presence. He's giving her the space the think and process her own emotions.
"Thank you." She says quietly looking fondly at her companion.
Kevin's eyes lazily look at her, "Yeah, you're not the only one who can give good advice." He smirks at her.
"Okay okay, I get it." She stands up and smooths out her clothes and rubs the dirt off. "Sorry for taking my anger out on you..." she says seriously looking directly at him, shame covers her face. "That wasn't fair of me."
Kevin stands next to her and shrugs his shoulders, "It's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't done it before."
Kevin stretches his body, cracking his back, "I just usually take it out on Ben." He says jokingly, smiling down at Gwen.
Gwen laughs softly at this. "C'mon, let's grab some lunch. I wasted all my energy today." Gwen says and covers her mouth as she yawns.
Kevin starts walking beside her, "I think I'll see what Ben's up to after, I'm itching to fight him all of a sudden." Kevin jokes.
Gwen laughs at him again and smacks his arm light, "Is that your weird love language or something?" She continues to laugh but Kevin only slightly chuckles alongside her.
His face is burning and if his skin wasn't already red Gwen would notice. Kevin mutters out something about just enjoying a good fight and Gwen just hums in acknowledgement.
She knows she needs to talk to Verdona. She can't do it today. Tomorrow is a new day, and she can navigate it then. She looks up at Kevin from the corner of her eye and smiles. She's content for now.
