A/N: This precedes the scene in "Exchange Rate" when Kensi finds Deeks showering at the boat shed.
"Deeks?" Callen called, swearing he'd seen his teammate ducking out of the men's locker room. He'd been about to shower after working out, but his curiosity got the better of him and he changed directions. "Deeks." He said again as he caught him hurrying down the hall towards the bullpen.
Deeks jerked and then turned around with a totally forced smiled.
"Oh, hey man, what's up?" he asked. Callen came closer, eyeing his damp hair.
"Did you just shower?" Glancing down at his shirt and ruffling his hair, Deeks shrugged.
"Yeah, I um, finished working out a little bit ago." Callen held back a chuckle. It was amazing that Deeks excelled at undercover work, because he sucked at lying to the team.
"Really? I was just in the gym and I don't remember seeing anyone in there with me," he pointed out.
"I got here early," Deeks explained, his expression now stubborn. Willing to go toe-to-toe with him, Callen crossed his arms and said,
"It's six in the morning and I got here at five."
"I couldn't sleep." Narrowing his eyes, Callen nodded and pulled his trump card.
"Hm, maybe I should ask Kensi about your early morning "workout"," he threatened and Deeks laughed nervously.
"Yeah, uh no, you probably shouldn't do that," Deeks muttered. Arms still crossed, Callen waited. Scratching at his beard, Deeks sighed and finally gave in. "Fine. Yes, I was showering here."
"Ok. Why? You clearly weren't working out."
"Because our shower is a disaster zone," Deeks burst out. "There's shampoo and conditioner everywhere and little bits of mostly used soap bars. You know, just those tiny little pieces that are absolutely useless and they'll just sit there forever. And don't even get me started on the hair."
Callen blinked, a little shocked at the verbal rampage. Apparently he'd unlocked a topic he had no business being a part of.
"Well, that is certainly not what I expected," he admitted. "So I take it the book didn't work then?"
"Are you kidding me? You saw the way Kensi reacted when you gave it to her. I had to pass it off as a joke." Callen patted him on the shoulder sympathetically, not sure what else to do. This was way outside his area of expertise.
"Well, good luck with that, but you should probably find somewhere else to shower for the time being. You know Sam likes to come in early sometimes and there's no way he'll let this go if he finds out," he suggested.
"Thanks, man." He started to head towards the bullpen again and Callen added,
"And maybe you should consider talking to Kensi about this." Deeks chuckled again, this time with the suggestion that Callen was insane.
"Yeah, no, that's definitely not happening." As he wandered off, Callen swore he heard him saying something about the boat shed.
