Genres/Rating: War, Family, Friendship, Romance, Angst. (T)
Characters: Rhea, Seteth, Flayn, Raine, Dimitri.
Summary: It felt like a waking nightmare, but what hadn't felt as such for the past six years? The torture, the experimentation, the laughing voices of her captors and her aching heart as she wondered if she would ever again see the light of the sun... All of it was a nightmare, but the news her brother had brought her, on the eve of the moon's end, had been the worst of it all. Was it the sins of her past, racing to catch up to her now that she had found freedom? She didn't want to admit the possibility. Didn't want to even imagine the horrors that would have come to pass to make it possible. And yet... Yet, some part of her wondered. What had she missed, in all her years... that had made it successful for them, but had never given her even an iota of hope until now?
"That cannot be possible... That cannot be possible!"
Seteth winced as Rhea raised her voice in both fright and disbelief, and he could only watch as Flayn carefully but purposefully grasped at her shoulders to stop her from rising completely from her bed. She looked haggard, bereft of rest and energy, but still her seafoam-green eyes were wide with horror and shock as the words he had spoken sunk in like a heavily weighted stone. Flayn's hands were more than enough to stop her from getting from her bed, and she sunk back, almost in defeat against the feathered pillows that had been propping her up for this planned discussion. Neither he, nor Flayn, had expected it to go well, but time was of the essence, and by next morn the rest of their army would be marching out to meet Nemesis and his soldiers in one final battle to truly end the war.
"I killed him... with my own hands, I... I know that I killed him... How is this possible? How is it that he endures, and yet all of our attempts have failed? What sorcery did the Agarthans use to bring him from the dead?" Rhea stiffened once more, eyes narrowing with both fury and pain, and Flayn winced away from her almost automatically at the sight of her anger. Rhea, however, ignored her completely, instead turning her eyes to her brother, piercing him through as she demanded hotly, "He marches here, doesn't he? Whatever twisted remnants of that monster would drive him here, to me, even after all these centuries... How did they do it...? Even with her power, even with her blood, to be resurrected... It does not make sense. You are sure of what was told to you? You fully believe this tale?"
"There is no reason not to, Rhea. The information we were given came to us at a great cost... and the scout himself sketched Nemesis' likeness. It was as if we were glimpsing into the past through a mirror." Seteth answered her calmly, though he could see those embers in her eyes beginning to burn madly with her anger. He could almost understand it, almost feel sympathy for her, and yet in an oddly detached way... He realized that he truly did not. He was saddened that this information disturbed her so, but none of her reactions stirred him with worry for her. Rather, they made him wonder what it would mean for others, for himself and the band of students and soldiers who would raise their weapons in defiance as so many others had all that time before. "I do not believe him to be fully resurrected... We have all... Nature flows in one direction. To bring back the dead is beyond our power. Instead, I believe he is merely a puppet. A dark magic is controlling him. Powerful, and likely fuelled by many Agarthans throughout their lifetimes, but he is a puppet nonetheless. The true Nemesis was indeed killed that day, on the Tailtean Plains... Whatever we march to face is a macabre farce of the true thing."
"If he wields a blade like the Sword of the Creator, as the scout says, then he is not merely a puppet. The Agarthans have long put their hands in evil magic... but to think they managed to succeed to this degree... Damn them... We were fools to believe them defeated all those years ago. We should have hunted them down, into the very core of the earth itself, to have rid us of them." Rhea almost snarled the words as the anger flowed hot and hard through her veins and gave her an energy she had not felt in many a year. Her heart was pumping wildly in her ears, making her want to stand, to grasp her blade and take to the field herself, even though a saner part of her mind knew such a wish was folly.
Her body was all but broken. The healers had done what they could, but their magic was simply not enough. Even Flayn's had not been sufficient, though she had tried her best to restore her lost energies. What she needed was sleep, a hibernation that would last long years in order to regain all she had lost in the dark dungeons of the castle of Enbarr, but the mere idea made her wish to bear her fangs in outrage. She would not scurry and hide like some rodent fleeing the claws of a cat. She had much more pride than that, even if her body would not permit it. She sat up straighter savouring the heat that blossomed through her body even if it only masked her pain and exhaustion, "You say that tomorrow the army rides out to meet him? Then I will follow."
"No. I will not permit it."
"You will not permit it?" Rhea repeated his words with raised eyebrows and some surprise, but after a moment of silence as her reply, she became sharply aware that he meant his words with every inch of his body. He would not allow her to take to the field herself to battle against her long-time enemy, and he would do what he must to stop her, if she refused to listen to reason. The mere idea made her want to scoff, but instead she felt her heart hardening as she met that steely gaze with a fiery one of her own. Her voice was icy, projecting a calm she did not at all feel as she answered him quietly, "I do not ask permission of you, Cichol."
At that, Seteth's eyes narrowed, and he watched as Flayn turned to look at Rhea with an equal mixture of surprise and nervousness at the call of her father's real name. It seemed to ring out in the small, but opulent room, a roll of thunder on a clear, sunny day, and for a moment, Seteth almost felt himself wishing to waver. She had not addressed him with such heat and command since the days of the war, when she had been his commander, and he had been her soldier. But that was a lifetime ago, and he was no longer unwise and afraid. He repeated himself slowly, purposefully as he sensed the tension beginning to crackle, "You speak as if my permission even matters in this endeavour, Rhea. Look at yourself. Your body would not carry you out of this room, let alone to the battlefield. You have no energy to fight, even if you've the will."
Rhea ground her teeth as the words hit painfully true, and she looked down at her own body with angry eyes. Frail... Sickly... Useless. She could do nothing until she healed, and she knew it just as he did, but it did not make her like it. Human healers, even if they were blessed with her own blood, simply were not enough. And she could not draw any more from Flayn, even if she wished to. Flayn's collapse had shaken her father too much to permit it, and while she still remained at her side, giving her what little she could when she was able, all three of them knew it was simply not enough.
Still, it only led to the current problems at hand, and she gripped down tightly at the satin sheets that covered her frail form. There was much more than just Nemesis' return to discuss, after all, and while she had her remaining kin with her... She flashed a glance about her room, her eyes flickering to the tightly locked doors in errant wonder if anyone was foolish enough to put their ears to them to try and eavesdrop. She deliberately lowered her voice, wary and leashing her temper as she did so when she spoke, "Then you intend to leave Nemesis to them, is it? Armed with knowledge they never should have had. What right did you think you had, divulging such information to them?"
"They deserved to know exactly what they were up against. I stand by my decision to educate them. Nemesis was a foe that once brought nearly all of Fódlan to its knees... Though he may be changed in power now, I will not make the mistake of underestimating him." Seteth replied calmly as he once against felt the edge of her temper lashing out against him in deep, cutting strokes. Her exhaustion from the dungeons in Enbarr was no longer as present in her mind as it had been before, and she was full of righteous indignation now for the secrets she had not wanted shared. "And I am afraid that the time for secrecy is rapidly drawing to an end. Even without my aid, they had deduced your true identity during the War of Heroes... It would have not been long before they ripped the veil away from everything. We cannot continue to pretend otherwise. To not arm them with the knowledge of the Relics, and of the efforts of our kin long ago, would leave them woefully unequipped for the battle before them. I would not see them come this far only to undercut them now, at such a deadly juncture."
"They deserve to know nothing... but what's done is done. To argue further with you would be useless. You have made your decision, as foolish as it was." Rhea replied bitterly, and she shook her head slowly as she allowed herself to sink back into her bed with annoyed exhaustion. She simply was too exhausted to continue the argument, even though she sorely wished that she could. She would never understand just how much trust he could put in those who had done so much to their kind, but it was well out of her hands now. She once again turned her eyes to the door, her mind wandering, and she spoke quietly, thoughtfully, "Do they all march for the battle...? There are so few standing soldiers left. Even if the forces beyond Garreg Mach are few, and not as powerful as they once were... The risk... Do you believe they can win?"
"I have never put much stock in the idea of "belief" winning battles... but they have come this far. They have the strength to go farther, if they wish for it." Seteth answered slowly, and his brow furrowed as he watched the thoughts flickering through her eyes like chain-lightning. So quickly she went from anger to concern, as if she was simply running circles in her own mind that he couldn't follow, and it made him weary just as well as thoughtful. "They all will march, every single last one of them... They know there is no choice for them, or for Garreg Mach. They will either win, and see us all safe, or perish in the effort, as heroes. After all they have done thus far, I will admit I can't see them facing defeat."
"I want you to see to it personally, then, Seteth. Ride with them, and protect the child. She cannot be permitted to die." Rhea's voice once again found strength, and her eyes flashed as she met Seteth's surprised glance with unnerving ferocity. A new kind of strength was singing in her veins, and she was surprised by it almost as much as she knew he was. It was thick and intoxicating, and dimly, some part of her realized that it was hope. A hope unlooked for and long given up on, but hope all the same... and she held onto it with both hands, desperate and eager as she explained, "There is still a glimmer of hope, even in all this madness... If the Agarthans have managed to revive Nemesis... Then we are not without a chance ourselves... We may still be able to bring her back yet. I won't lose this chance. I can't lose this chance!"
Seteth said nothing, his eyes narrowing as that fervour, that heat, once again washed over him like an acid. He had hoped that after all that had happened in Enbarr, after her return and seeing the toll the war had taken on the siblings, would have softened her in her quest... but it was clear that this was not entirely the case. She hadn't spoken a word of Sothis since her return, at least not until now, though he could see how her thoughts had been so easily directed again. He could see Flayn uneasily eyeing Rhea as well, clearly not liking the track her words had taken, and Seteth struggled for a few moments to find a diplomatic way to answer such an order.
'There is no point in making another attempt... But to say so, now of all times... It would not be wise...' The thoughts roiled like thunderclouds, filling his chest with uneasy tension as he watched Rhea watching him with fevered eyes. It was there again, like a spectre from the past just like the one who they had marched again so many generations ago, and just as it had then, it made his blood freeze and his spine stiffen. Even without access to his true form, even with much of his natural power withered away... He could sense the madness. He could sense the wild desperation that had given her the power that had dwarfed them all, even as her elders, and had given her the reigns of leadership despite all reservations.
She had not listened to reason then. Seteth knew full well she would not listen to reason now. And he knew, every last shred of instinct he had was screeching about how futile the effort truly was. He had seen it in her eyes, had heard it in her voice and in her words, and he had come to understand the true futility of what they had tried to do all those years ago. The woman that would have been the vassal was no longer capable of fulfilling the hope that Rhea was so desperate to see done. She had grown too much from the "blank slate" she had once been, and even further... His eyes slid silently to his daughter's startled and fearful gaze, and he could see the revulsion that she had once hidden and swallowed shining clear in those sharp pupils of hers.
All those years ago, Flayn had shown reluctance when the bare details of the plan had been explained to her, and now, he was well aware that she would never permit their dreams to come to fruition if she could have a hand in it. Her allegiances had changed over the past several years, and despite himself, Seteth could not help but believe it was for the better. She loved her professor dearly, and she harboured ferocious guilt for the part she had played in hiding away any sort of secret from the siblings who had taken her in at her urging. Her willingness, her eagerness, to divulge her true lineage to them had been all the proof he needed to know now that if push came to shove... She would be amongst the many willing to raise a weapon in defence of the professor of the Blue Lions.
The futility of it all felt like the weight of the world on his shoulders, and he struggled vainly to find his words. Perhaps his brothers were not as foolish as he had once believed them to be. Forsaking the world, forsaking this insanity, almost seemed like paradise compared to the position he now found himself in. They had stood by, silent and narrow-eyed when she had first declared her intentions, and it had not been long after that they had taken their leave of them all. They had never spoken outright of their thoughts of her goals, they had known better and instead blamed the humans for their withdrawal, but even now all these years later... Seteth wondered if she still saw their leave as a betrayal, or as a natural consequence.
With difficulty, Seteth swallowed down the bile that had been rising in his throat as he continued to search vainly for speech. What could he say to her beyond cheap promises, that he could not wholly fulfil? As much as he wished to, he knew no good would come of telling her to abandon her dreams. It was over. He knew that it was over. The woman they all yearned for was long dead, and whatever wisps that had remained of her had long ago flickered out, too. The hair and eye colour of their supposed vassal may have changed, and her powers with them, but... She was not an empty cup for them to fill. She had seen to that herself, in her struggle against the Empire, her own comrades... and even if, against all hope, that they somehow succeeded...?
'I will not take part in it... I cannot... take part in it. No longer.' It almost surprised him, how clearly, how loudly, the thoughts rang out within his own head, and yet as soon as they did... Seteth had to bite the inside of his cheek to stop himself from smiling wryly. She was not the only one who had changed, it seemed. He wondered where his cowardice had gone, but he supposed it didn't matter. For once, he could feel the weight of it all on him, and for once, his spine would not buckle. He had seen those seafoam-coloured eyes spark and glint, had heard her voice whip out such authority that even he had been compelled to bow down in subservience, and he had seen the kindness of her smile when she looked out across her loved ones, and saw them all looking back at her.
He would not be the one to take her away from them... Nor would he be the one to take them away from her. He had played too much of a role in this madness to ever fully absolve himself, but at least at this line... He could stand tall, and keep what tattered remnants of his conscience clear. He would not participate any longer. He would not meddle further in the lives of the humans who had risked it all for him and his kin, even if they had done so unaware. He could not do it, and look his daughter in the eye ever again.
"I shall do as you ask, but... I will admit that I doubt she will need my aid." Seteth spoke slowly, masking himself as best he could as he watched his sister glance up to him with narrowing eyes, and a frown pinching at her pale brow. She looked so sickly, so small and frail, but underneath her pallor there was that fever, and even as he was, standing at her bedside, it reached out to burn him. He met her stare evenly, keeping strictly to the truth even as he sensed his daughter now looking to him sharply from the side, "She has protectors aplenty... but she does not need them as fiercely as they believe she does. She has grown strong, this past year. Stronger than ever, if truth be told, even if she tires of battle. If there is to be one person and one person alone that I would feel confident in... It would be her. I shall join her on the battlefield, and I shall watch over her, but I doubt I shall be needed, when all is said and done."
"The child has always been strong... but I, too have seen her growth... It's a good sign. A hopeful sign... but I still will not permit a mistake to happen now." Rhea replied with a slow, painful shake of her head. Her eyes had once again narrowed, casting suspicious glances in every corner of her room, and she folded her arms against her stomach as she muttered, more to herself than to anyone else, "Ensure she returns to Garreg Mach, no matter the circumstances. I will not see her throw her life away at Nemesis' blade, if he proves to be too much for them all. Carry her here yourself if you must. She cannot fall on the battlefield. She cannot die to that monster's sword. I do not care how you do it, or what you must do to see it done. You must return with the child intact, Seteth."
"Again, Rhea, I believe your concern to be unnecessary. She is strong... and she is well protected. She will not need me, at the end of all this, I can assure you." Seteth replied diplomatically, and he reached absently for his daughter's wrist as he felt her growing tension and saw the way her lips pursed as if she was fighting off a reply she obviously knew better than to say. Thankfully, Flayn went with him silently, stepping up neatly from the bed and sliding behind his shoulder to hide her face as he continued almost conversationally, "But you must rest, in the interim... You are still not well, and it will do you no good to work yourself into a fever. We shall excuse ourselves for the time being. Please, sleep, Rhea... When we return, you shall see us victorious."
Seteth allowed for no reply, and he and his daughter turned hastily for the doors. He was still clutching at her wrist, though she did not fight him and seemed almost as eager as he was to escape her chambers. Rhea watched them closely as they fled, disliking the tension they had left her with, but even as weak as her body was, her senses remained as sharp as ever as the door closed on their retreating forms. Even through the wood, even though their voices were hushed, she could hear Flayn hotly speaking to her father, and her hands gripped into fists as Flayn's words rang like the bells of the monastery in her temples.
"The professor is not a thing!"
Horsebow Moon
Garreg Mach (Gardens)
Morning
It felt so strange that the sun was shining so brightly in the sky, that the birds were chittering away happily in their trees, as the weight of the world hung like a stone about her shoulders. The monastery felt deathly still, and she supposed that the emptying of the troops could be to blame, but she knew better. For the better part of an hour the soldiers had been preparing and readying themselves to march, and most had already begun to take their leave to the frontlines of what was hoped to be the last battlefield of this godforsaken war. There was so much tension and fear in the ranks, but to a man, everyone stood tall as they collected their weapons and rations and hurried to their posts, and for that, Raine felt a stab of pride somewhere deep in her stomach.
They all were afraid, in one way or another, for what was to come, but all of them had stood as one and sworn to march when they had been called upon. There was so few of them remaining, almost as few as there had been when it had all begun, but still they were ready despite it all. Every single soldier could have turned away, could have chosen to go home and she would not have begrudged them of it, but it was as if none of them had considered it an option. They all knew they were marching to war against a legend, against written history, but their response to this truth was to hold tighter to their weapons and promise themselves to the monastery's defence, to the end of the war... To challenge the King of Liberation, and see him buried once more.
A small, rueful smile played on her lips as she closed her eyes and tilted her head back, and she relished the feeling of the warm sun on her skin in the early morning hour. She was so proud of the few men and women who had remained, who were to march alongside her, and yet a part of her wished that they had refused the call when it had sounded. She had seen too many die already, had buried too many comrades and foes alike, and yet this war continued on into some twisted fantasy that even she could only now stare at it, dumbfounded with horror and wonder at the truth of it all.
Idealisms and politics and lies had created so many rivers of blood that it was enough to drown anyone who so much as looked aside at it, and now history itself was rising from the grave to throttle the few who had survived until now. It almost seemed humorous, in a dark and twisted way, and Raine wondered errantly what Edelgard would have thought of it had she had known where her enemies would have eventually turned their blades to when she was dead and buried. She likely would have laughed, likely would have heralded it as being due justice to the false gods that had given the thief and murderer his crown in the first place, and Raine mused idly that she probably wouldn't have been wrong to laugh.
Still, such thoughts of humour were not truly in her own taste. It didn't matter that her brother saw the irony and pointed it out flatly, as she simply was not like him. The twisting of history had done its work on the humans of this century, and from the reports of the past fortnight, they all were seeing just how deeply in horror the world was responding to it. In every direction people were fleeing the king and his men that they had once worshipped as a hero, and now, in Garreg Mach, the descendants of his men were preparing to cross blades with the ancestors who had given them their power, and their weapons.
It seemed like a philosophical question for an exam, if the power of the new blood could overcome the weakness of the old, but all were aware it was not truly so simple. Whatever had been done to raise the dead from their graves had been dark and unspeakable, and even the most bloodthirsty of them were showing hesitation and confusion now. What glory was there to be gained from returning corpses to the ground? What wrongs could they right, with history now being proven to be a lie, and their powers and weapons being things wrenched from a long-dead people they had never known, but were continuously wronging just by living as they had been told to do? It sent everyone spinning in unending circles, and even Raine was aware she was not immune from such questions and wonderings.
Her fingers errantly reached out across her waist, caressing the long cracked and worn hilt of the blade she wore on her hip, and almost immediately she felt the blade warming in response to her contact. She did not need to unsheathe it any longer for the Sword of the Creator to answer to her, and a part of her ached in regret as she now understood why that was. Not only in her soul did she carry the remnants of Sothis, but she wore them on herself, too, and as she always did, she felt a strange mixture of comfort and disgust as she lightly followed the cracks in the bone down towards the empty spot where a Crest Stone should have been embedded.
It was not as if she was at peace with herself, or with the knowledge she had been given, but she did admit that things made much more sense now than they had several moons ago. Her connection with the blade, the ease with which she wielded it, and how natural it had felt in her hand... Of course it had always felt as if it was a part of her. It did not matter that the soul had long since departed the body, or that the "heart" was no longer there in it to give it power... She held the soul, or at least, she had once held it within herself, and the body had answered that call like a cry from a long-lost friend.
At the very least, with this knowledge, Raine could feel a sense of calm and truth in the sentiment Sothis had shared with her so long ago... That even if they were to never see one another again, that they would never truly be separated. It was all that was left of her, the little blunt-speaking goddess who had given her everything when she deserved none of it, and though it was paltry, Raine could at least promise she would do what she could with these gifts. She could give her vengeance, and ensure that never again could the man who did this horror to her, to her kin, do more to others. He would never hold her in his hands, would never use her to hurt the people she wished no ill upon, and Raine had already sworn that she would see to it personally that Nemesis would find his second grave deep in the cold earth.
A long, tired breath escaped her, and Raine felt herself slumping slightly against the tree that she had been leaning on. It wouldn't be long before she, too, would be called away, and though she was not afraid of the summons... She was not entirely looking forward to it. The march to the plains would be a short one, but the battle ahead was likely to be the worst any of them had ever experienced. There simply wasn't enough information about those they stood against, as so much of it had been twisted and warped by time, and by the Church. False Relics, corpses, a straggling few Agarthan remnants... It almost seemed comical, in a dark and bitter sort of way. Yet, Raine took in another breath to steel her nerves. There was no point in thinking too deeply about it yet. The battle was on the horizon, not yet in front of her, and she needed to save her strength for that moment.
Quiet footsteps to her immediate right snapped her from her reverie, and Raine turned her head in the direction of the sound before feeling her chest tighten with instinctive dismay at the sight of the owner of said footsteps. Leaning heavily on the wall, and still dressed so lightly was the Archbishop, and she looked as haggard and worn as she had when they had freed her from the dungeons in Enbarr. The shadows of the hall did little to aid in her already pale complexion, and the hint of dark circles around her eyes only seemed blacker without the sun on her face. She looked unsteady on her feet, gripping the columns for balance, but her eyes were fiery, as if she had summoned some hidden reserve of energy to slip out and away from her private chambers to seek her out.
Raine felt the unease deep in her gut as Rhea likewise paused upon being noticed, and she froze where she was, watching her with those same fevered eyes that made the younger woman so much more uncomfortable. It was a greed-filled stare, hungry and wanting, and instinctively, Raine stiffened her spine and wrapped her arms protectively over her chest. All those warnings and whispers came roaring back to the forefront of her mind, and she could feel them like claws scraping across her flesh now, but she fought viciously to keep an of it from coming to her face. She donned her mask as casually as she could manage, forcing her body back into a relaxed posture before she spoke calmly, conversationally, "Rhea... I don't believe you should be up and about just yet. If the healers reports are to be believed, you're still not well... Nor do you look as if you should be far from your bed, or the infirmary."
"That does not matter. There is something I wish to speak to you about. You, and you alone." Rhea's reply was rushed, almost pleading, and she cast a hasty and searching glance about herself as if she expected someone to spot her and sweep her away in a moment's notice. She likely was not wrong, as she felt as if her feet might not hold her, but she refused to give way to her weakness. She had snuck away from her guards and healers, slipping free of her bindings to search out the child before her, and she had no intention of wasting even a second of the time she had. It was almost amusing, the idea that her time was limited, but she felt no humour as she moved forward hesitantly to close the distance between them, "I have been told of what is happening... Of who you intend to fight. I wished to warn you."
"I think I've been sufficiently warned." Raine answered slowly, but she watched, quietly curious, as Rhea continued to slowly, tentatively keep coming forward. She did not leave the shadows of the hallway, likely not wanting to give way to open ground where she had nothing to cling to, but Raine didn't much mind the thought. What was more pressing was that look on her face, the raw, pale expression that cut away every ounce of professional serenity that filled her memories of the woman, and Raine was sharply aware that for the first time since she had met her... She could see how fragile the Archbishop of the Church of Seiros truly was. Every warrior's sense she had told her with full confidence that she could simply reach out, and with a single hand, shove this woman easily to the ground and meet minimal resistance for trying. It was a jarring thought, considering all she had seen of her in combat both in a woman's form and as the Immaculate One, but Raine trusted her instincts all the same, and it allowed her to be blunt and calm as she continued, "I'm not afraid of what's to come, or who I'm facing... and I've been also sufficiently informed."
Rhea felt her spine stiffen at the casual dismissal, and her eyes narrowed as she looked sharply to the woman leaning casually, calmly, underneath her chosen tree. Her body language and expression told no lie even if it was deceptively calm, but the thought seemed ludicrous to entertain. The words made her grimace, taking her back many, many years where blood had covered her hands, her face, her everything after so long of fighting, and to hear this young whelp tell her so calmly she was not afraid of what had hounded her for all of her own past... She shook her head slowly, her hand tightening its grip on the stone column she was likewise leaning against as she reprimanded her sharply, "If you feel no fear, then you have not been sufficiently informed, my child. Nemesis is a monster."
"Was."
"I beg your pardon?"
"Nemesis was a monster." The correction came firmly, but still somehow casually, and Raine didn't bother to lift her eyes from the sky that she had chosen to examine once Rhea had started to speak. She didn't wish to look this fragile creature in the eye, to see her fevered gaze and feel her hunger on her skin, and so she chose not to look, preferring to keep the shield firmly in place to keep both her composure and her comfort intact. The words however could not be ignored, and Raine continued as she felt Rhea's stare now burning holes into her body in shock and confusion, "Whatever comes for us now isn't Nemesis, or the Ten Elites. They've long since departed this world. We're fighting corpses, not men and women... Nothing more, and nothing less. And corpses don't frighten me. Warin summed things up rather easily in the first council... If it can bleed, it can die. Nemesis already bled, and already died. If he faced defeat before, then he can be defeated again. It's simple fact. I won't lose to a corpse. And I won't be afraid of one, either."
Such confidence. Such arrogance. It took Rhea aback, and she floundered momentarily for a response... It was something she would have expected from her brother, who had never once minced his words where she was concerned, but Raine had always played a much more conservative hand in their conversations. She had never failed to be polite and casual, keeping her firmly at an arm's length while still allowing her in, but this was different than that. This was a woman in full confidence with no walls now between them, and Rhea hated that her words stumbled out past her lips as those cool like-coloured eyes bored holes into her own, "But... If he is more than just some puppet...?"
"Then I will do him a mercy, and put him back in the ground where he belongs. No soul should be bound to a walking corpse... Even a villain like Nemesis. The afterlife had a place for his soul, if you believe in such things, and should you believe him to be alive again, then he isn't receiving his due punishment right now as he is, is he? Putting him back in the ground is just a matter of course, regardless of what he is now." Raine's answer came calmly again, and she was aware, distantly, that her words were prickling the temper of the much older woman who was regarding her in silence. She couldn't tell entirely if it was rage that held her tongue or something else, but it didn't much matter. When she had learned of what was coming, she had already made up her mind. Nothing could change it now. "He can return to his endless world of punishment, if his soul has returned in some warped capacity of what it once was... and if it hasn't, then at least I can put his corpse to the ground, and ensure it's never again made into a weapon of war, or a puppet to be controlled."
"You... You speak as if you have... empathy for the creature..." Rhea felt the word sting like bile and vinegar on her tongue, and she almost spat out the sentence as she instinctively drew away from the quiet, solemn child who had not moved an inch from where she was standing. She looked like a statue against the light breeze and in the warm sunlight, still and calm and removed from the world, and Rhea felt herself deeply unnerved by the dispassionate show. It was not like what she had been told the child had become, and she had seen her raw emotions before already, but now she seemed to have regressed, and the words she spoke made her shudder with loathing. It was impossible. It was unforgivable... How could she speak so calmly, so placidly, about the monster who had brought down her kindred, and allowed for that accursed sword to hang from her belt? It simply did not make any sense.
"It isn't so simple. I want this to end, Rhea. I'm tired of fighting battles that do not concern me. Of fighting wars that I never should have participated in. This is one more battle that I've been drawn into, and one more battle I will fight and win, in order for it all to simply be over." Raine countered with a slight edge of her own, and her eyes flickered from the roaming clouds in the air to the woman who was glaring at her as if she was some sort of refuse found in a ditch. She understood the loathing, the inability to understand, but she felt no shame in her words, or in her emotions... and she was frankly tired of disguising them, when she had been the one to seek her out, and start this inane conversation in the first place. "But I am allowed to have my own opinions on the matter, even then. I have no sympathy for the man that Nemesis once was, or for the vast crimes he committed. I wish to see him ended as much as you. But I still am permitted to believe that the state he is in now in a regrettable one."
"R-Regrettable?!"
"Puppets are unfortunate creatures. Lacking a will of their own, being forced into action against their wishes, and being used by those who could not care less for them in any capacity. They may dream of power, of choice, of freedom, but they never truly had any of those things from their very conception... What Nemesis is now is a puppet. What Edelgard was... was a puppet." Raine's voice remained flat, but that edge sharpened and turned cold, and her hand was drawn against her will to the hilt that was pressing almost comfortingly into her hip. It was faintly warm, answering her temper, and she almost appreciated its connection to her, but she held her hand as she turned her gaze fully to Rhea and told her in a quiet, chilly voice, "Their circumstances were regrettable, even if cutting them down is the only choice left to us. Edelgard had many chances to change her path, many chances to cut her own strings without so much bloodshed, but her arrogance blinded her, and in the end, consumed her. I cut her down without hesitation, and I would do it again if needed to, but I still think her situation was a pitiable one, even if it was mostly of her own doing. The same can be said of whatever it is that Nemesis has been turned into... and again, I will cut him down, just as I did to Edelgard, with no hesitation. I will always choose to fight to protect my loved ones, no matter the foe I face. But I can still find the situation my foes are in to be regrettable, even as I bring my blade down."
The words were physical blows, each one striking somewhere deep and precious and unprotected, and Rhea's hand tightened viciously on the column she had been leaning on without thought. For a moment she thought she felt her nails extending, forming claws to dig into stone as bile rose in her throat, but when she looked to her hand, it remained small and pale and fragile as ever on the end of her wrist. She looked back to the child, wondering, but any courage she had felt before was swept away by the returning gaze that had never left her since she had finished speaking.
The stare was like a winter's wind on her skin, freezing her solid and questioning in words unspoken if she would dare to reply. It was close, too close, to the actual truth, and it almost seemed as if bait had been laid out between them, and as if she was waiting to see her reaction. Rhea's spine stiffened, and a soft whisper in the back of her mind warned her to take caution. She was back six years ago, seeing Warin staring at her with utter and open contempt, and those damned eyes of his, so much like his mother's, were cutting like blades. Even though her colour had changed, even though she now looked more like them than her own family, there was no doubt that Raine's gaze was exactly the same as her brother's.
How did she manage to summon such heat, such ferocity, without ever twitching a muscle in her face? Warin's scowl had been so pronounced that his entire body radiated with his animosity, and yet Raine merely needed nothing but her eyes to communicate her emotions. She looked so disarming, leaning underneath the leaves of an old tree as if she had always been there, and yet... Rhea felt a shiver of fear tingle along the back of her neck. She was being surveyed like a rabbit wandering outside of its den, unsuspecting of the wolf that was hiding in the shadows, awaiting the right moment to pounce. And Rhea knew, deep in her unconscious and with every feral instinct that she still possessed that this wolf would break her spine with one swift movement if she dared to even breathe.
The pressure was unbelievable, and Rhea almost wanted to scoff at herself for how she wavered underneath it. It had been so long, too long, since she had felt her knees tremble, and felt the urge to turn tail and flee. This was a child she faced, a child she had helped birth and clean at her most vulnerable, and yet... yet... She feared her. From the very depths of her soul, she feared this child and what she knew, and what she was demanding still more of her. She had thought her brother the more dangerous of the two, because he was open in his defiance and his hate, but now Rhea realized with a painful twist in her stomach that she had vastly miscalculated.
Raine was the one who held the blade that had once cut down against her own all those lifetimes ago, and now she was the one showing a kindness, an understanding, for the monster who had wielded it before her. She could see no shadows of that man in her eyes or her expression, and she did not expect to, but she still felt that same wave of dread that had frightened her into complete and utter submission when she had been nothing but a child herself. Every last ounce of her dragon blood was screeching inside of her head, warning her to tread lightly, if at all, and she felt a sudden and inexplicable plume of guilt making itself known deep in her stomach.
'Do you find yourself pitiable, then? Do you believe your place to be amongst them, in the ground, because you, too, are a puppet?'
The words would not escape her lips even though they rang through her head like thunder, and she could only stare, silent and unbelieving as it cleaved through all of her thoughts in a flash. It was not something she had ever considered, had ever once imagined, and yet now it was all she could see in this unmoveable woman who had weathered all the storms that had been thrown so cruelly her way. She was battered and exhausted, it showed in every line of her face and in the slump of her shoulders... but still she was standing. Still she was armed, and still she was ready to once again move, puppet or no, because she knew it was the only thing she could do.
"You must do this for me, Rhea. Bring her back. You owe me this much...! I don't care what it takes! Bring my baby back, and don't you ever permit her to die again!"
The command was a roar in her ears, long since lost to time but now deafening, and Rhea winced away from it automatically in both surprise and with a numb sort of horror. That long-forgotten voice, speaking so heatedly, so ferociously, from a mouth that had only ever spoken so gently to her. That fire in those eyes had burnt her like magic then, and even in her mind's eye, it scalded her now... and a sudden feeling of emptiness shook away all her plots, all her plans, and left her reeling in disbelieving silence. It had been a command she had obeyed, even though she had not wished to. She could not in good faith ignore it, not when the truth had been thrown so cruelly in her face then... What had changed? When had it changed? The questions swirled uncertainly, making her chest tight as she struggled to find the answers, and found them sorely lacking.
Rhea turned, unable to face that gaze that was so familiar and yet so alien, and she wrapped an arm tightly about herself to disguise the trembling that had set up in her limbs. She would not take the bait that had been thrown her way, but she did not have to. Raine had struck her all the same without needing her to react, and bile was sour and bitter on her tongue and burning in her throat as she struggled to breathe. She could only shake her head, curling in on herself as she forced her legs to move, to take her away from this place and from that child, and her voice was weak, shaken and fragile as she murmured distractedly, "Then I shall... wish you luck... and pray for your success until you return..."
Raine watched her go in silence, feeling that icy claw around her ribs even as the white-garbed woman disappeared into the shadow of the halls, and then completely into the monastery. The disquiet was stifling, making her lungs tight as she wondered what that long silence, what those flickering emotions in her widening eyes had meant. So much had passed over her face in such a short amount of time that Raine hadn't been able to even begin to guess at what was stirring in Rhea's mind, but she supposed it was for the best that she hadn't had a chance to probe her further. It would only be a distraction for the battle ahead, and she did not need such things to cloud her mind when she needed her sword to be the only thing she could focus on.
Rolling her shoulders carefully, Raine allowed a quiet sigh to escape before her eyes flickered skywards to judge the sun's height. No doubt she would be called soon to leave with her own squadron of men, and the thought only made her stomach feel heavier in silent anxiety. She mused that at least the closer she came to the fields that the closer the end of this entire mess came, and that would need to be sufficient enough motivation to lift her feet. She had spoken truly enough about just wanting for all of it to be over, for the book to close so she could find some sort of ending, but it was still out of her reach. Tantalizingly close, brushing teasingly at her fingertips... but now within view. That would have to be enough.
More footsteps brought her back to the present, and for a moment she stiffened in indignance for the second interruption only to feel all the tension melt away at the sight of the new intruder. Dimitri had appeared from behind the corner, likely ready to fetch her now that the preparations had all been dealt with, but as she took a look at his face, she realized at once that was not the case whatsoever. His eye was narrowed into a dangerous slit, and his jaw was taut, as if he had been exerting quite an amount of pressure in keeping his mouth tightly shut. He moved with slow but sure purpose as he came closer, and a sinking feeling in her gut warned her that her conversation with the archbishop had very likely been overheard.
He proved it as he closed the distance in several long strides, but his silence unnerved her as she wondered just how much it was that he had heard. They had not been speaking loudly, but if he had come early enough to fetch her and found her occupied, he wouldn't have ever dreamed of interrupting. Of course, considering her conversation partner, he likely wouldn't have left, either, even if basic courtesy would have demanded it. It would be against his core principles to ever leave her alone with Rhea, no matter how well he knew she could fend off anyone who came for her if she was sufficiently riled. It was simply not his way, and from that intense look on his face, she knew he had been there from the very beginning, and had heard every single word that had passed between them. She swallowed loudly, hating him for his protectiveness even as she loved him for it, and she began tiredly as he marched up to her, "Dimitri, I know what you're going to say, but-"
Whatever else she had planned to say was abruptly silenced as Dimitri yanked her none too gently from the tree, and she started in surprise as she landed safely against his chest. He had yet to don his armour, leaving her pressed as close to him as he possibly could manage, and his arms were unbreakable bands of steel as they encircled her entirely. He held her tightly, almost enough that breathing was difficult, but any ideas of scolding or explanation vanished from her head as he buried his face in her hair and squeezed down. His muscles were so tense that he was trembling, and his breathing was harsh in her ear even as he held on tightly, and for a moment, Raine felt a sharp pain in her eyes at the sheer amount of strength he was displaying as he held himself back from crushing her to him without thought or care.
It was the one thing he practised so fervently, his restraint in how he touched her, but not once in all their time together had she ever felt him shake from the effort. Usually he preferred to be gentle, sometimes almost too soft for fear of doing her harm, and even when he allowed himself to indulge in his lusts, he was always still leashing himself in some form to ensure no permanent damage was ever done to her body. He was simply too strong to ever be free with himself, and even at his best, he could still litter her body with bruises and bite-marks that took weeks to fade away whenever he approached that hard-drawn line in the sand. Now, though, it seemed like he was battling some inner demon as he held her, and as his arms crossed behind her back to keep her more firmly trapped, the shaking in his arms only increased to prove how hard he was fighting for control.
Worry took the place of annoyance and exasperation, and Raine struggled only a little to free an arm as Dimitri clutched her as close as he could manage without squeezing the very breath from her lungs. His face remained buried in her neck, his breath rough on her skin and in her hair, and slowly, hesitantly, her hand reached to brush gently against his ponytail. His only reaction was a low grinding of his teeth, and the sound made her stomach drop somewhere to her feet and possibly lower as she began again, now much more concerned than she had been before, "Dimitri...? What's wrong? What is it?"
"Don't forget your promise."
If he had sunk Areadbhar into her stomach, Raine mused she couldn't have been more shocked as those harshly muttered words reverberated deep in her chest like the distant roll of a far off thunderstorm. It took her a solid minute to find her footing again, even in those strong and trembling arms, and she rewound the conversation she had had in her mind to hear her own words echoing back at her in bitter coldness. She had revealed too much to Rhea, had spoken of things she had been keeping tightly to her chest, but he had heard it all, and his reaction was not one she should have felt surprise over. Of course the first and only thing he could think of was to remind her of her promise, of their promise, and once again her eyes burnt as she bit her lip and allowed the guilt to flow strong and heady through her body.
She did not deserve the life she had, and her heart still did not beat no matter how much pain was inflicted upon her mind or spirit. Raine did not believe in gods, and she knew what awaited her when death came again to claim her, but none of that mattered to him. She knew it didn't, and she ached all over with pain at the thought of what he had taken away from the words he had overheard. It made her reach for him, digging her fingers into his hair and tunic to return the pressure he was exerting on her, even though she knew she never would be capable. Her throat felt tight and her extremities were cold as she whispered raggedly into his shoulder, "Dimitri, that's not... I don't intend to... I'm sorry..."
"Don't forget your promise." Dimitri repeated the words in a low, warning growl, and he fought with himself to not tighten his arms against every single base instinct that he had. He wanted to clutch her close as much as he wanted to shake her for the lunacy he had heard her spouting, but he knew he could not do either of those things. He would only hurt her if he did, and that was the last thing he wished for, regardless of how enraged he felt. He had suspected she had been harbouring doubts, had been hesitant and wondering, but... He shook his head, pulling back only enough so she could see his face, and he stared down at her, grinding his teeth against his emotions as he gritted out with great effort, "You cannot die. I won't permit it, damn you. You swore to me that you would live. Keep your promise, no matter what it costs... Don't put me in a position where I'll take away your freedom to ensure your survival. I won't be able to stop myself. You know that I won't. Please, Raine... Uphold your oath. There will be no point in my surviving this far, in continuing to live, if you aren't there to live beside me."
It hurt. Every single inch of her was shrieking in pain as she took in his tortured expression and allowed it to be seared into her mind's eye. Even in Grondor, when he had been watching her fade, he hadn't looked so anguished. There had been too much fear and guilt then for his pain to be paramount, but now that's all there was as he stared down at her in utter desperation. That low note in his voice, the way it broke as he spoke of taking away her choice in the matter if it meant that she lived... She could feel the very fibres of her being shaking with the pain, and instinctively she pulled him back to bury her face in his chest. The tears were sharp pinpricks, leaving a trail of acid down her cheeks, and she bit down hard on her lower lip to stifle a sob that had abruptly built up somewhere deep in her chest.
The man she had always relied on, the man she knew best for his unfaltering strength and willpower was trembling in terror over the thought of losing her, and it broke her in a way she hadn't known she could break at the realization of it. She had never once doubted that he loved her. Such a question had never risen in her thoughts. But this desperation, this brutal show of emotion was overwhelming to face. He didn't need to drop to his knees to make his plea any more clearer, though she knew he would if she allowed him to think she was hesitating.
Letting out a long, pained exhale, Raine pulled back just enough to be able to see his expression, and was not at all surprised by the gritted teeth and the tortured scowl. She squirmed for a moment to free her arms before lifting them so her hands could clasp his face and hold it tightly. Her fingertips brushed lovingly against the ragged fabric of his eyepatch, tracing the edges tenderly before she spoke in a voice made tight with tears, "Dimitri... I won't forget my promise. What I said to Rhea, it was all my true feelings, but I swear... I never once considered forgetting what we promised. I want this to end so I can find a new future. That's all. I don't intend to give up on my life... It's not my life to sacrifice anymore."
Dimitri felt his jaw flex at her last sentence, but he ground his teeth to resist telling her that such a statement was delusion. Her life was her own to live, and to sacrifice, at her own discretion... but still, she would give in to those who loved her, those who needed her, over her own needs and wants. He turned his head slightly, pressing his lips to the heel of her hand, but his own didn't dare to remove themselves from her waist to hold her close. He took in a haggard breath, forcing down the horror, the revulsion, but still the anger remained when he spoke tightly, "When we return... Rhea will answer for all her crimes against your family. And when she does, you and your brother can mete out any punishment you deem necessary... Then, after... You will never need to deal with this again. You'll have your peace, and your freedom, however it is you wish. I'll use all of my power I command to see it done. I swear to you."
"It's just one more fight... One last battle, and then we can put this war entirely behind us. That's what's most important now." Raine ran her fingers tenderly through his bangs, feeling that trembling from the hands that were clasping her so tightly it almost was painful. Still, she admitted she didn't care as she watched the way he was staring at her with such raw desperation... He wanted to make good on his promises, so much so that she wasn't sure if he was reassuring her, or himself with his words. It mattered little either way, as it brought her comfort, and she stood on tiptoe, touching her nose to his before continuing softly, intimately, "We'll make it through this together. All of us will. And when it's over, I want you to come to my quarters and spend the entire day and night with me in my bed to celebrate the end of this madness. It's the least we're owed before we have to get to work in rebuilding and creating peace, don't you agree?"
"Agreed." Dimitri's answer was a low sigh, and he leaned down before she could fully return to her feet to capture her lips with his own. Her soft murmur of surprise quickly melted into one of pleasure, and the hands that had been cupping his face were quick to curl about his shoulders to anchor herself to him. His body relaxed against his will, savouring the way she pressed so intimately into him and wishing that he could allow this sensation to last forever. Part of him throbbed, feeling the weight of the ring in his pocket more than ever, but he quickly shut it away. It was not the time, or the place, for that conversation yet. Not when they were so raw, and there was still those final hurdles to clear. It just was not right.
Pulling away from her took more self-restraint than he wished for, and from her unhappy frown, he knew she wasn't at all inclined to stop, either. Duty, however, was beckoning, and he reached to stroke her cheek, allowing his want to show clearly as he apologized softly, "I'd give you so much more, my beloved, but... time is against us. We need to arm ourselves and march with our men. That's why I came to fetch you in the first place. But we will have time later... Time that I will make up to you, in whatever fashion you wish. For now, though, duty calls."
"That's fine... We'll manage. We always do." Raine gave him a slow nuzzle before she, too, allowed herself to pull back and away. He seemed so reluctant to let her go, and that softly sad way he looked at her made her face warm. She wasn't sure how she did it, how she could make this behemoth of a man melt into the most eager-to-please puppy, but a part of her selfishly enjoyed this strange power she wielded. He truly was hers to do with what she wished, and she wanted nothing more to wipe that frown from his face and see him smile, calm, kind, and carefree as he had so many times when they had been teacher and student a lifetime ago.
Now, however... They were no more barred from one another in such a matter, and she had seen that smile more and more frequently since they had begun sharing a bed. It was still rare, still something she was most the capable of drawing out of him, but she didn't begrudge his friends for their own love for him. Still, he was hers, at the end of it all, and that knowledge brought her a sense of peace she hadn't ever truly known. Already the stress and tension from speaking to Rhea had melted away, leaving her warm and content and relaxed in the face of what to come. She was settled with him, with what would follow, because she was his.
Raine curled her arm through his, tugging him lightly along, and she offered him a small smile when he blinked at her in surprise as he followed after her clumsily. He continued at her pace, always obedient and expectant, and she hugged his arm a little closer as the warmth of his presence fuelled her as the sun did to the tree she had found repose under earlier that morning. She looked up to his boyishly puzzled face, warm and secure as she tightened her hold on his arm before she chuckled softly, "Come on then, Your Highness. Let's go to the armoury and fit ourselves for what's to come... but you're the one who's going to give the speech to the soldiers before we head out."
"Ah... Y-Yes, of course..."
AN:
I regret wishing for winter. So much. I forgot that Canada's winters are less a slap in the face and more a punch to the solar plexus. My entire body has been feeling like a bruise lately! But it is what it is. It's not like I can move south, after all. And as much as I complain, I do actually love my home, and I don't feel like leaving. I would like to see my fiance, (it's been a full year since we've been together, THANKS COVID) but that's sadly beyond my control. So stay safe, inside, mask up, and get your vaccine if you can! I wanna see my damn fiance!
The upcoming battle isn't going to last more than a chapter, and the big build-up that I've been working towards, the confrontation of the Eisner siblings and Rhea, is rapidly approaching. I can safely tell you that there will be parts of Silver Snow that you will recognize, however it is also not going to be a rehash of Silver Snow's ending. Mostly because I want to finish this fic as I started it, a journey between two siblings who each have their own reasons and wants and needs, and having them finally be met (maybe) at the end of all of they've been through. Will that be a satisfactory conclusion for my readers? I'm not quite sure. But I am settled in my decision on how I want this all to end, so there is that.
There will, also, of course, be a chapter or two that is solely dedicated to the "cleaning up" afterwards of that confrontation, with an epilogue to follow, to neatly tie things up in a bow. I'm aware that it may seem like everything is dragging on, but, well, I want to give this story an ending I think is fitting for it all. There's a lot left I want to cover despite the length it already has gotten to, and unless I cover it, I'll feel as if I've intentionally left it out. While I have contemplated making a little compilation of fics, or moments, that didn't make it into the overall story, I don't want to relegate the "important" moments to such a thing. Either way, you tell me what you'd like to see, and maybe we can come to a compromise.
As always, thank you all for reading this far and sticking with me. Leave a review should you feel the need, and take care of yourselves and your loved ones. Happy reading, and I hope to see you all again next chapter!
Mood: Pleasant.
Listening To: "You Found Me" - The Fray
~ Sky