Ten Years Earlier
It was the looks that drove Sean insane. He hadn't been back to school in a week. After the crash, he stayed home to recover. He wasn't physically injured, which he thought was unfair. He, Olivia, and Abby left the car unscathed. The only person affected by the accident was Nikita (and the other driver, but his sister was the only one who mattered). That shouldn't have been right. He wasn't the only one who thought so. Their friends were as upset and grieving. They probably shouldn't have returned so soon. They survived the crash that killed someone they loved. That wasn't something to get over in a week. Especially when everyone knew about it.
News spread fast in a highschool; rumors spread faster. Whispers followed Sean, Olivia, and Abby down the halls. Sympathetic glances chased after them once they turned their backs. Sean couldn't take it. Why couldn't everyone leave him alone. Why couldn't his friends and teammates just talk to him like they normally did. He already lost his sister; he didn't need to lose his sanity as well. But anger ate at him like a parasite. It wasn't fair. It wasn't right. Everything should just stop- let him breathe, let him scream. He couldn't take it anymore. But the stares were holding him in place. His anger simmered.
Ms. Bennet was the one to catch his lividity. She pulled Sean aside and attempted to talk to him. The second she said how sorry she was with actual empathy in her voice instead of that awkward sympathy, he broke down. Tears fell heavy from his hazel eyes. He had only allowed himself to cry once since the accident; he had forced it all down since, not wanting to feel hurt anymore. Locking himself in his room and hiding from his family had been a great strategy. But with his teacher, his vulnerability was exposed. It all came flooding out of him. The grief was too powerful not to express.
Speaking softly, Ms. Bennet knew all the right words to say to ease his heart. She helped Sean settle and breathe for the first time in a week. He still had to struggle to fully process and mourn his big sister's death. However, his teacher had given him the tools to do so. He was even able to apply the grieving tactics when his dad died a couple months later. It happened over the summer, so at least the stares of his fellow students didn't bore into him. And his mom and other sisters were around more, so they could all mourn together. He was able to accept the death around him. It was painful, but he managed it with the help he had received.
Present
Alex and Sean had a fairly productive day in Russia. Their mission wasn't necessarily successful. Yet they were able to walk away with something. Although Katya wasn't in her room and neither Semak nor Ari would divulge where she was, Alex was able to reach out to her with a press conference; she really appreciated the journalists that were following her around. They also couldn't get at the black box. However, Sean managed to swipe Ari's harddrive. He currently had it connected to a laptop Birkhoff had given him, letting the program the nerd created to decrypt the information. They'd have vital intel soon enough. Things didn't go as they had planned, but it wasn't all a loss.
The two decided to relax on the couch for the time being. There wasn't anything they could do until all the pieces fell into place. Alex had suggested they watch a movie, but Sean wanted to talk. He had promised childhood stories when they rescued her mother, yet then was a much better time. Besides, he kind of wanted to see her smile and laugh. It had been a difficult couple of days. They deserved some time to themselves- pretend they weren't in a war with multiple black ops groups. Settling on the sofa close to him, she had no problem with that idea. He beamed at her. She smiled back.
Unfortunately, Nikita called before he could begin. Alex answered the phone, immediately. It was late their time; if she was calling, it must've been important. Sean sighed, but there was nothing he could do to stop the women. A joke was on the tip of his tongue about how similar the two were. They'd drop everything for their friends. Some of it could be blamed on their crusade; something could've been wrong. Except, it was just who they were- stupid bleeding hearts. That tease died before he could utter it, however. Grave and distant, his sister informed the others of what had occurred. His heart instantly dropped and shattered. The information rang empty in his ears, "Ms. Bennet's dead."
"What happened?" Was that even his voice that responded. Sean could barely hear himself. He couldn't hear the women talking around him either. Nikita wasn't saying anything, though. It was all Alex, demanding to know everything. Was there an attack on the safehouse. Was there an accident. No way Carla had been out in the field with the team. If she died, something tragic must've occurred. But the rogue was floundering under the young woman's questions. She wasn't prepared for the bombardment. She was still trying to process everything herself. It was too soon, too sudden, and too hurtful for her to truly think.
"She was working with Percy. It was self-defense," In clipped tones, Nikita relayed everything that happened from murdered Division agents, to saving Ryan. Alex listened with rapt attention, asking things here and there for more details. Sean, on the other hand, remained silent. Despite the fact that he was already sitting, he felt like he needed to get off his feet. His head was swimming, and his heart stopped beating. He thought after losing his father and sister as a teenager and all his years in the Navy taught him how to handle death; he shouldn't have been as affected as he was. But no one could've been prepared to lose someone. Especially when they were supposed to be innocent.
Carla Bennet's betrayal was more shocking than her death. She had protected and cared for the Pierces when they were kids. How could she have turned on them to Percy. How could she have been loyal to a place that had hurt Nikita so much. Sean's thoughts shifted to his mother for a second, yet he quickly shook it away. His mind couldn't become muddled. He had to process the news and help the team move forward. That was easier said than done. When his sister finished talking, he still couldn't speak. Alex had to wonder for him, "Are you okay?"
"Nerd's pretty shaken up. And Fletch's gonna debrief with us in a sec. But we're good," Usually, Nikita could skillfully deflect any personal questions. But her attempt to make things lighter fell flat. The nicknames and her refusal to answer for herself only proved how not okay she was- how could she have been when she watched someone she loved die, after she had tried to turn against her friends. Whereas, Sean was willing to let his sister get away with not talking, Alex was going to push forward. The rogue made her discuss her mother and Semak when she hadn't wanted to- turnabout was fair play
"Sean wants to talk to you," However, Alex knew Nikita was too stubborn to open up to her over the phone. Fortunately, she had a brother. Sean was terrible at talking too; she could see it in the way he was fighting back his emotions. The siblings could bully their thoughts and feelings out of each other, though. Taking the call off speaker, the young woman handed the cell to the Seal. He gave her a look that somehow mixed annoyance and gratitude. She shrugged it off like it was nothing. They were all about helping her, of course she'd help them in return.
Left alone, the siblings didn't say anything for a while. Where was there to even start. Their former teacher was dead, and that was painful. Yet, she had intended to hurt them. Her death saved the lives of the people they loved. Though, they did love her too. Or at least the memory of her. Ms. Bennet definitely wasn't acting like herself since they had brought her to the safehouse. The things she said and did would've never come from their teacher. Sean sighed, the thoughts confusing him and breaking his heart. He really couldn't talk about it. And he doubted Nikita could either, "Did Michael make you call?"
"He handed me the phone," Good to know that continued to be predictable. She might've had the idea and intention to call her brother, but her inability to let all her emotions out held her back. A gentle nudge from her boyfriend was needed to get her to take the final steps. Well, not really with how eloquently the siblings' conversation was going. Sean and Nikita fell back into another lull. They could've just agreed with one another that it was too complicated to discuss while it was still so fresh. But it was probably just their stubbornness and insecurities keeping their mouths shut. Strong feelings had gotten them into serious trouble before. Although they were talking to their sibling, how could they be certain it wouldn't happen again.
"Are we that bad at talking?" Eventually, Sean chuckled. It was ridiculous. What was so difficult about expressing what they were thinking. Sure, forming the right words was hard. And miscommunication was bound to occur. But at least it'd be out there. No harm could come from them grieving and mourning their former teacher's death. It was natural to be upset when she had meant so much to them. The two had also lost so much already. One more blow was destroying their drive to continue in their fight. It wasn't ruined completely- not by any means. Yet, the fear of more pain was nearly crippling.
"We're avoiding it now," Nikita found herself chuckling as well. Despite the silence, her brother was easier to talk to than Michael. He might've also experienced devastating loss, but he wasn't able to quite understand how she felt about Ms. Bennet. She couldn't help thinking that the woman she brought to the safehouse wasn't really her former teacher. That person was lost years ago, twisted by fear and a maddening need for revenge. The rogue figured she might've turned out the same, had it not been for her team. She was incredibly lucky to have them in her life. She wished Carla had had the same support, or that she had accepted it when it was offered to her, "We lost her a long time ago."
"Yeah. Can't believe she worked with Percy too," There he went, back to thinking about his mother. He couldn't stop the urge to; the parallels were beyond present. Both Madeline and Carla had made deals with the bastard. Their motivations were different, as were the circumstances, but they both turned on Sean and Nikita. The women even defended themselves the same, thinking Division had started as something good and that they had to save somebody. At least Sean found it easier to forgive his mother. It was continuously a sore subject, but he understood her need to protect her daughter. Carla was only acting of her own self interests. Madeline had tried to be selfless in her own way.
Nikita, however, didn't agree with that. She was hidden away by Madeline, and shoved aside by Carla. And once she had confronted them about it, they claimed some aspect of Division was good for her; she had survived and saved others, after all. She couldn't see how her brother saw forgiveness in those actions. It made her wonder how her sisters would handle everything. No doubt the twins would've been more level headed than their flaring tempers. They had always been rational while the other two were up to some stupid antics. Nikita would've done anything to know what they would've thought and what they might say to comfort her, "What have you told Jill and Sandy about all this?"
"Nothing. Just that this has all been Seal stuff," Sean was being honest. He couldn't involve Jill and Sandy into that mess of a war. They would've been in danger. Besides, they didn't need to know about their mother's corruption or their father's affair. They deserved to continue thinking the best of their parents- someone had to. And as much as he would love for them to know Nikita was alive, it was safer if they didn't. Their sister brought more enemies with her than he could count. She hated that her brother was in danger enough as it was. Her innocent sisters had to remain as far away as possible.
"They've always been better at talking," Softly, Nikita replied. Jill and Sandy had to be kept safe no matter what. But, God, did she miss them terribly. She missed being able to rant with them about their parents and brother. She missed watching movies and gossiping as a girls' night in. And she missed their early morning runs, where they tried to race one another but ended up just calling it quits and getting breakfast or coffee. There were many reasons why she needed her war with Division to end; her sisters were definitely one of them. She couldn't wait to go home to them. And she couldn't wait to bring her team home with her.
"Soon, right? A big ol' Pierce family dinner," On the same page, Sean put a lot of hope in his sentiment. Although they kept thinking the end would be soon with all of their victories, it had to be true that time. They didn't have to suffer all that pain for nothing. Instead of being hopeful with him, however, Nikita grew silent. Something about a family dinner made her shut down. He figured it had to do with their mother. But surely she could survive a night with her if he and the twins were around. He didn't get the opportunity to ask her what she was thinking, though. She ended the call before questions could arise.
"I gotta go. I, uh… don't die," It was an awkward way to hang up. Nikita sounded rushed, as if she was being pulled away somewhere. That could've been true; Ryan had to tell her, Michael, and Birkhoff about his time in Division. Yet Sean was certain it had to do with some insecurity of hers. She was hiding things from him. She might've tried to deny it, but he knew it was true. His sister didn't trust him with something, and it honestly pissed him off. They had crashed back into one another's life- they couldn't keep pushing each other away. That wasn't going to bring them all home.
"Yeah. Don't die. Again."