All rights to Kiera Cass. This book is designed to make story edits that largely follow the original plot. So even in the edited parts it is often largely Cass's writing.

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Author's note:

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(edit)

CHAPTER 36

I YELLED "Rebels Run!" and that was all the permission the guests needed to evoke utter chaos, but this wasn't a time for things to be orderly. In order, the rebels can pick off people much easier. I could hear bullet shots. Terrified screams. Bodies hitting the wall. Bodies hitting the floor. Feet slamming against the ground begging for an exit that may not exist.

Don't panic at the guns America, stay calm, stay focused.

Kriss's chair was shattered, and she was panicking. I pulled Maxon to the ground with us so he was out of sight as Aspen crouched on the ground in front of us. Maxon and I immediately sent Kriss with him.

We looked over and saw rebels had blocked the back door where the king and queen had tried to escape out of. The King was holding the Queen's hand and as one rebel guard aimed the gun at Queen Amberly. The King quickly pulled her behind him, and the rebel re-aimed. He was hit directly in the chest. The rebel was then shot six times by four different guards, but the damage was done. The king was still, blood pouring out of him, there was no way he would survive. I have seen a lot of dead people, but it wasn't until I saw the blood pooling on the ground, dripping off the platform, that I realized just how much blood a person has.

I grabbed Maxon's hand as we saw the queen get pulled away screaming. Two guards carried the King's body somewhere, probably the infirmary. He's the king, you don't admit he's dead that easily.

A stray weapon slid within reach and I handed it to Maxon, he looked at me and I replied simply, "You hunt, I've never held a gun." He leaned around the table and shot twice. From the sound, he hit one.

We saw Aspen, and he crouched down to our level. "We need to get you two out of here." Aspen looked above the table and shot once, clearly hitting his mark. "Come on." Aspen checked the hallway and Maxon turned around to protect our backs. I glanced to the room, horrified by the ease it would take for one to mistake this as a graveyard.

Maxon fired at a rebel who looked at us, and Aspen encouraged, "Now." We ran down the hallway knowing stealth was the name of the game.

"I'm out." Maxon huffed, the echoes of the useless clicks supporting the testament. This was by far the worst rebel attack I had been in. Even when the guard was shot dead not ten feet in front of me, wasn't nearly as terrifying. Not nearly as deadly. About forty people had died in that attack, and already more than that had died in this one. The rebel alarm finally went off, a little late, but for those who weren't in the action hopefully it would help.

We rounded two more corners, running deep into a dead end. Aspen went to hit the button. I turned around and to my horror saw a rebel aiming his weapon. I grabbed the extra weapon on Aspen's holster and fired. I missed, but it was enough to make the rebel miss too. He was shooting to kill, and no one died. Aspen turned and in one quick shot, the rebel had a bullet in his head. Maxon and I were then pushed into the safe room, it locking from the outside.

Maxon fell over immediately. No one was dead, but Maxon was shot in the leg. I grabbed underneath his arms and pulled him further into the room.

"You were shot, but you'll be okay My Maxon." I comforted.

"I can barely feel it." He stated, shocked.

"That's the adrenaline. You'll feel it soon enough. Trust me." I ran back and searched the room, there was medical supplies thank god. And a decent amount. I took rubbing alcohol, gauze, a wrap, piece of cloth, a pair of scissors, and a chair.

I raised Maxon's leg onto the chair, then used the remaining space to keep the supplies.

"America what are you doing?" Maxon asked, grunting as the pain started to set in.

"I helped raise sixty kids, remember?" I organized the supplies so it would be easy to grab without fumbling. "I learned some first aid along the way. I have never had to treat a gunshot wound, but we have gotten some bad gashes, the goal is the same: minimise blood loss and prevent infection." He nodded and I talked him through what I was doing. "Okay Maxon I am going to cut down your pant leg to get to the wound." I cut with the scissors doing my best to keep my hand steady enough that I didn't hit the wound. As I cut deeper... my hand turned red. Some part of me I recognised the red was Maxon's blood on my hand. I can't cry. I need to do this. I can't cry. I peeled the cut pant leg away managing not to touch the wound more than necessary.

"Okay I need to pour rubbing alcohol on it to clean it now. This is going to hurt a lot." I unscrewed the cap, his blood smearing across the white bottle. As I poured the liquid I wasn't ready for the sound of his screams. It was worse than the sound he made while he was being canned. By his sounds I thought I was killing him, but I wasn't, I was saving him.

I took the cloth and tied hard above the wound to limit the amount of blood flow then grabbed the gauze and wrap. "I'm going to wrap it now Maxon." I put the gauze over the wound. Wrap toward the heart, I repeated to myself from the library's first aid book. I finished wrapping and collapsed to the ground.

Maxon was breathing hard. "That feels better thank you."

I can't cry. I can't cry. I can't cry. I silently got up, went to the sink and watched his blood wash off my hands down the drain. Soon enough it wasn't just the sink water and blood rushing down, my own tears had joined.

I tried to be quiet, but there were no other sounds to listen to. "My love. Come here." Maxon called. I didn't move, I couldn't take it. He couldn't die, I can't do it. "Don't make me come after you." He joked.

I exhaled and willed myself to move, kneeling by his side. "My America please look at me." I obliged. "This wound isn't fatal. You've done an excellent job patching me up, I will fine."

"What if you're not?" I choked.

"I will be." He promised and opened his arm. I layed down, my ear pressed to his chest. My heart rate syncing with his. As long I hear his heartbeat it would be okay. He wrapped his arm around me and held me tight. "You told me you would panic again. And I am almost certain you're going to panic now, but I need you not to shut me out okay? I'm not dead, I'm right here, just stay with me."

I nodded and laid there, crying slowly, listening to his heart beat. It was steady and strong. After maybe twenty minutes he spoke up, "I get it now. Why you fainted when you heard your father was dead. I wasn't even that close to mine but…."

I grabbed his hand. "Maxon he was your father. You're allowed to be upset."

"He would be mad at me for it. He would bark at me 'grow up boy you have a country to run now'" We both laughed a little.

"He was a pretty bad parent, but for all his faults he did love you, and he did want you to be a good leader. Though I'm not sure in the end that matters." I admitted.

"He was a terrible parent. I don't think I would have believed you that he loved me if I didn't hear it myself. That moment keeps echoing through my head. I had been waiting to hear that my whole life because even though I tried so hard not to care, I wanted to make him proud." Tears were streaming down Maxon's face. "And in that one moment it felt like I was finally enough. That I somehow had finally earned his love."

"You always had his love Maxon. He was just awful at expressing it."

"How do you know that?" His voice was a mix of puzzled and hopeful.

"We talked more than you knew. And every once and a while he would admit he loved you, or be bewildered by me seeking comfort in my father, wondering where he failed. Even when he was threatening me it would slip in."

Maxon's voice filled with confusion. "But he hated you."

"As a selected." I corrected. "According to him he respected me as an advisor, was okay with the idea of me being your lover, but was repulsed at the thought of me being a princess. I guess you can say we were frenemies of sorts."

"I had no idea."

"You weren't supposed to. The number one rule of those conversations was that it stayed between the two of us, I told you more than I should have over time but never close to everything." I thought for a second. "I was so frank with him, I still don't get why he put up with it. I guess the frienemies thing. I could swear he almost liked that someone would stand up to him."

Silence took over before Maxon commented. "You know I talked to your father too."

"You never told me what that was all about. Is the time finally right?".

Maxon turned his head so he was looking up at the ceiling. "Well you see My America I had a massive crush on you. I couldn't talk to my father about it, because he's my father, and I couldn't talk to my best friend about it because she was kind of the one I liked." I laughed a little. "So when her father came into town I was desperate enough to look for answers in him. I casually asked him what he thought of me, the idea of his daughter being a princess to test the waters before I jumped into what I really wanted to know. I gathered up all my strength and said 'sir, I really like your daughter, but I don't know if she feels the same way about me. She's my best friend, and I am worried if I do the wrong thing that will be gone forever. How do I know that the right thing is?'

"He turned back to me and looked me in the eye responding, 'I don't know how my daughter feels about you -I don't think she knows how she feels about you-, but I do know if you care about her you will make the choices that will make her the happiest, not you the happiest. As long as you make those choices, you've done the right thing.'

"And I always have. He was right, that always felt right, because whether I wanted it to or not, my happiness has become completely dependent on yours."

I kissed him, "Why couldn't you tell me that?"

Maxon turned to look me in the eye, "Two reasons, the first one being I didn't want to scare you off with telling you I liked you too soon. And two I REALLY didn't want to scare you off with what happened next." He piqued my interest and continued his story, "I then went so far to ask you father if I wanted to marry you would he approve. He told me he would support whatever made you happiest. Telling you that before we were together in any capacity would have been disastrous."

I laughed, "Good call. I probably would have panicked and locked myself in a room for a week." He laughed with me and we fell silent. I was so scared of my feelings for Maxon, and now? I was far more afraid of what they meant then the love itself, but Maxon was going to be with me so it's okay. And my father would have been okay with all of this right? Because I'm happy.

A while later Maxon broke the silence. "I don't suppose with my father gone your position on being queen has changed?" Queen, not princess. That's what it was now, the king was gone. Maxon was the King.

"I wish My Maxon."

We were silent for even longer then Maxon began to laugh, it was out of nowhere, "Maxon are you okay?" I frantically asked sitting up. Was he getting delirious? Had he lost too much blood?

He tightened my grip on me, letting me know everything was okay, and I leaned back down. "Everything's fine, maybe better than fine...I was just thinking. You don't want to be a queen like Illea has its queens."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Think of Cleopatra, she wasn't just a pretty face. Or more modern, the Italian monarchy, their queen is a part of running the country. You're right. Queen as someone who is out of the loop, and hosts fancy parties, and is only the face of change not the driver of it, isn't you. But why does that have to be what a queen is?

"America what you did today. Evacuating the room, staying calm, fighting back, that's what a queen should do. You would still have to have some diplomatic presence….but I see no reason why as queen you couldn't truly run the country with me."

I was stunned. He just wanted to change the job. "But who would throw the parties, and choose castles decorations and…"

"We'd get a team of people to do it. You would have some involvement, and would of course have to attend the events, but the rest of the time. You can be by my side through policy changes, war planning, diplomatic relations. WE can run the country. Truly together."

"Are we allowed to do that? Just change what it means to be queen?" awe shinned in my voice.

"Who's going to stop us?!" He laughed, and I joined him. "So will you marry me? Will you be my queen and run the country with me?"

"Absolutely." I kissed him.

"Really?" His voice sounded almost boyish.

"Maxon Schreave you have solved all our issues. I love you. I want to marry you and be with you with all my soul. You just made it possible for my conscience to get in line too. So yes, yes, a million times ye-"

He cut me off pulling me into another kiss. "I am the luckiest man alive to know I get to spend every day for the next many, many, years declaring my love for you to the world. I love you with all I am, America Schreave." I shuddered at the sound of it. I was going to be Maxon's for the whole world to see.

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Thank god they figured it out because I was not sure what to do about them. Funny story though I actually had to stop writing before this chapter because I didn't know how to get myself out of hole I dug. - me on 1/25/21 reading comments on chapter 15 like: lmao my readers are way smarter than me. But it also don't feel like a solution that would be so obvious to them because of the harsh patriarchy they live in.

Note: some of you are probably mad about how I changed the King's death. And that's okay. No it's not a redeemability moment (I swear you guys redeem people way too easily lol). The king is a bad person, bad people are just complicated in the real world. And he doesn't hate his family, most of the time people abuse people it's not out of hate, especially when they've been abused themselves (which seems highly likely in the King's case especially if you've read the queen). That doesn't make abuse okay, and that is a big part of why he is not redeemable. I just don't like black and white characters. I don't want to spoil anything so I will explain why I made that change from a writer's stand point at the bottom of the next chapter.

Thanks for reading. As always please comment! I love to hear your thoughts!