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Once again, here's your reminder to read the warnings.
And sorry for always rambling about my crap in the author's notes, so feel free to skip the rest of this note. I'm just pretty upset today 'cuz I've finally heard back about my biopsy from my doctor, and essentially they still can't tell if the abnormal cells in my throat are cancerous or not. They're gonna see if there's any of my sample left, but if there isn't, or if the sample comes back either bad or inconclusive (yet again), I'm gonna have to get half of my thyroid removed. I'll probably be told to have the surgery no matter what the results are, though, because even if the cells aren't dangerous now, they might be later. So, it's very likely I'll need to get the surgery, and I'm just kinda freaking out about it. And idk, it's just getting less and less likely that I won't have to get it.
But, onto the story:
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Remus cradled Janus close to his chest, holding him like one would hold an unconscious damsel. If that damsel happened to be an imaginary, half-snake man who just passed out after having a panic attack, that is.
"Remus, I saw you pick something up from the table. What was it?" Logan asked seriously.
"... Pill bottle…," he replied slowly. "How… how do we know if he took any?"
Logan's face momentarily shifted to an expression of deep concern, no trace of the blankness he had been trying to maintain, but the logical side quickly schooled his features. He couldn't let himself be distracted by his own emotions right now.
"When we get back to the living room, we'll try to wake him up. Hopefully, he just fell asleep after exhausting himself," Logan answered.
"... But what if he did take them?"
"... Then we'll try to treat him as best we can until he recovers."
XXX
When Logan and Remus returned, the latter carrying an unconscious Janus, Virgil sprang forward from where he had been standing with the others.
"Is he okay?!" he demanded.
"We aren't entirely sure," Logan responded slowly as Remus laid Janus down on the couch. "We had to break his door, and he had a panic attack. And we… we found a pill bottle, but we don't know if he's taken any."
"... Oh my God…"
It wasn't until that quiet gasp that Logan and Remus realized that Roman had brought Thomas along with him when he returned to the mindscape.
"What-What should we do?" Thomas questioned.
"We should try waking him up. If we can do so, we can attempt to ask him if he's taken anything," Logan told them. "If… If we can't, then we'll have to figure it out from there."
Thomas nodded seriously, and Virgil was already at the sleeping snake's side, beginning to shake him awake. It was a bit rougher than was perhaps necessary, but thankfully, Janus bolted up, wide awake.
"What's- oh fuck," Janus sputtered out as he awoke.
"WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, JAN?!" Virgil shouted. "DON'T- You better not pull this again… fucking…"
At hearing this, they saw Janus's face crumple, and Virgil immediately realized that he had likely sounded pretty harsh. Yelling at Janus in this situation probably wasn't the best move, but he had done it without thinking. Trying to backtrack, Virgil kept talking.
"No, Jan, I'm not mad at you," he said. "I'm extremely fucking worried. Did you take anything? Logan said you had a bottle of pills."
Janus just stared at him, and started breathing heavily again. Patton came over and put a hand on Virgil's shoulder.
"Virgil, maybe back up a bit and give Janus some space, okay?"
And Virgil wanted to argue, wanted to pull Janus close and make sure he was okay, but he knew from experience that overwhelming someone on the brink of another panic attack was a bad idea. So, instead, he took a few steps away from the couch, allowing Janus to sit up and curl into a ball on the couch cushions.
"I-I-I," Janus stuttered out. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry!"
The others, aside from Remus (who had seen this before), were all shocked at what they were seeing. They hadn't ever seen Janus like this. Even during other emotionally-charged moments, Janus hadn't ever looked so scared and small.
"Janus, buddy, you don't need to apologize," Thomas told him. "We're not mad at you. We're really not. But we need to know if you took anything."
Janus wasn't looking at them. Instead, he was pressing his face into his bent knees, his arms pulling them close to his chest.
"I-I… No. No, I…," Janus stumbled. "I… I took a few y-yesterday, but I didn't…"
Once again, Virgil felt his heart plummet. Janus had taken something.
Logan stepped forward.
"Janus, how many did you take?"
The other man took in a few shaky breaths before answering.
"O-Only three… I-I stopped after that…"
"Is that the truth? It's okay if it isn't, but if that was a lie, you need to tell us. Did you really only take three of them?"
Janus nodded.
Virgil felt the need to ask Janus what color the sky was, but he wasn't sure if Janus would be able to respond to that question, or how the other man would react to it. He didn't want to make Janus feel like he was accusing him. Even still, as he looked at Janus curled up like that, he had just about convinced himself to ask anyway. But before he could, Logan must have seen something to convince him Janus was telling the truth because the logical side seemed to accept the answer.
"Alright… Alright."
Virgil took a deep breath in.
Okay, at least it wasn't that many. Janus wasn't in the middle of an overdose.
He was telling the truth, right? Virgil hoped to everything that he was.
"I-I'm sorry…"
Suddenly, Remus was by Janus's side, pulling him into a tight hug. Janus flinched at first, but then he relaxed into the familiar touch.
"It's okay, Janny… It's gonna be okay… We aren't mad, and we don't hate you," Remus whispered to him. "We've just all been really worried… We love you, Jan, okay? It's gonna be alright…"
Janus let out a sob.
"I'm sorry!"
"I know… I know…"
"I-I didn't! I was- I-I…"
He cut himself off with another sob and a harsh, hiccuping breath. Remus began rubbing slow circles on the other man's back.
"It's okay… You don't have to explain anything right now. We can talk later," Remus comforted. "Just rest for now, okay? We'll be here when you wake up."
And Remus continued to comfort him until he finally drifted back to sleep once again.
XXX
