1. I Pulled Off Your Wings, Then I Laughed
Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of its characters. I also do not own any game characters or lyrics that I may also put in here. Thank you.
Chapter Thirty-Seven: I Pulled Off Your Wings, Then I Laughed
Kenji sauntered into the kitchen as he waited for Karen. They were supposed to hit up an
arcade and just mosey around with kids their age – try and be normal. Sometimes, he thought
they were just trying hard to remember that they were once ignorant teens by acting silly and immature along with their own generation. It seemed strained with other kids, but with Karen, goofy humor and lopsided grins came as natural as breathing.
But now and again, he was still a teen guy with raging hormones and he responded in like to every good-looking woman – like Valon. He tried to put the moves on the tall woman, but it
was kind of hard to do with his best friend's family hovering around them. He thought he saw Yusuke wink at him and nod his head at the native beauty in that encouraging way males
indicate to one another to make a move. He smoothed a hand through his hair, puffed out his chest, and then –
"_Good game, little boy," she congratulated with a flirty smile._
His ego deflated, as if he was a little red balloon and she popped him with a needle. It's kind of hard trying to flirt with a woman when she regarded you as a 'little boy'. He was ready to say he wasn't a boy and felt the annoyance of wanting to show her up with a
sarcastic remark of some sort. He respected women greatly. He was honestly chivalrous and always held the door open or provided that strong shoulder for any tears.
So it startled him that he would turn a cold shoulder toward her and she responded silently, as if instinctively, by imitating his coldness, too. They had a strained silence with one
another when they were both invited for lunch with the Urameshis. Then, it was as if they were trying to show each other up by playing the 'she's my best friend' act. She would
whisper in Karen's ear and they would giggle. He would text a playful message to Karen and
she would snort, which was much more enlightening then just a mere giggle. Best friends snort with one another and friends just giggle.
_Oh well_, _herloss_, he thought glumly. He guessed Pocahontas just wasn't in to him. It was a pity, as he could have played the role of John Smith, despite his mixed heritage. If
his mother were alive, she probably would have been ecstatic that he found a beautiful Indian woman, like her – until the princess turned out to be a cocky and snooty girl, just like all the rest of those popular girls at school.
He wondered if he'd ever get a girlfriend. Why the hell was he into older women anyways? He supposed it had something to do with his intelligence and the fact that he had little
experience, so seeking out one with experience always pulled him in. But ever since that date with one of Keiko's friends, he had steered clear of such women.
It wasn't actually a date. She just invited him over and he had felt like that awkward teen trying to be a man as he hovered around in her living room. She made him lemonade (which
tasted bad) and he nervously gulped it down to combat his growing nerves. Then, in mid-drink, she tackled him. His lemonade went flying in the air and she was dragging him upstairs into
the bedroom. In his hormone driven mind, he had been surprised he had snagged such a well- developed woman. He got as far as her beautiful breasts where he stared at them with a
mixture of wonder and lust before a door opened up downstairs. She had a husband!
Kenji's heart went in to overdrive as he squeaked down at the busty woman in a tone of
accusation. How could she have done this to him? He was about to be that bastard that was
caught in the act of having sex with another man's woman! He was almost the participant of an affair – that wedge that caused a majority of divorces. She was cheating with him and he was about to get his ass kicked!
He was lucky enough to toss his own ass out the window with his pants halfway on and shirt thrown on backwards. He fled with all the purpose of another guy fleeing the scene before that bedroom door went flying open.
So he was still, disappointingly, a virgin. It was lame. It was embarrassing.
At that thought, he wondered if Karen was still a virgin. She had that odd relationship with Hiei. He didn't know what was going on between those two. She went off with the demon for
nearly six months, which would have frightened the shit out of him, and probably just about
everyone else. Then she showed up, looking very pretty, and the demon was nowhere in sight.
He rarely saw the two of them together and if it wasn't for her disappearance with the
intimidating guy at the temple, he would have thought they were done with whatever it was they had with each other.
Things happened between now and then, and he hadn't been able to see much of Karen. He surely didn't see much of Hiei as the demon was hardly around after the temple incident. He had
asked and Karen calmly said that the demon had business in Demon World. Kenji never asked what was going on between them, but he assumed they were still together as Karen had that smitten look in her eyes whenever she said that guy's name.
But – he shook his head – she was probably still a virgin. They were both awkward young
adults. She still acted the same around him, but surely, that would change if she wasn't like him, a lame virgin. Only, she was really- really- beautiful and Hiei was a cold bastard, but definitely male. Kenji frowned. She would tell him if she wasn't a virgin, wouldn't she? Best friends usually told one another such things… if they were of the same gender, but as they
weren't, such topics were shyly avoided. If she wasn't anymore, then he was even lamer because he had lost a kindred virgin friend.
_Oh, the agony_, he hung his head.
Shaking himself from his thoughts, he dug around in the fruit bowl sitting on the counter. He found the perfect apple, rinsed it off, and bit brutally into the red flesh. Kenji leaned
against the counter and munched away with brooding eyes. When he had nibbled all the way to the core, there was still no Karen. He checked his watch and discovered he had waited for
nearly half an hour already, which was unusual, as she never took long to get ready.
Kenji tossed his core into the trash and slouched off toward his friend's room. He was
halfway up the stairs when he heard muffled words. He paused and glanced up curiously. It sounded as if there was an argument coming from one of the rooms. Silently, Kenji crept up the steps until he was high enough to hear the words more clearly.
"Can't we just talk?" Karen's strained voice slid beneath the doorway of her room. Kenji saw the flicker of shadows. "Normally," she asked. "All we've been doing is fighting –"
"And that's my fault," answered rough voice. It was Hiei's, and Kenji furrowed his brows. "It's this damn house, which is something I'm going to fix."
"What do you mean?"
Hiei's voice was smooth, but with a hint of mockery. It was always cold when he spoke, or so Kenji thought. Kenji wondered how anyone could stay the in the same room with that demon. He was a scary asshole! If he were alone with the demon and the man mumbled 'happy', Kenji would have died of fright. That's how terrifying Hiei was to him.
"Obviously, we won't be living here," Hiei explained coolly. "It'll be even more annoying when that brat is here."
There was brief silence, but then, Karen said, "I can't leave –"
"You actually want to stay here," asked Hiei blandly and Kenji could imagine the demon
sweeping his hand outward in indication to the house, "with all the bickering those two have been doing?"
"What, like we haven't bickered just as much?" she huffed in annoyance. Kenji was slightly in awe that his friend could act in such a way with the dark demon.
"Take responsibility for that," he snapped angrily. "Tell me who you were talking to and this time, I expect the truth!"
"I told you it was Kenji!" Kenji paled.
"You're really starting to piss me off, Karen," muttered Hiei so lowly that Kenji had to
strain his ears to hear the venomous words. "Do you actually think he could ever achieve that type of masculine voice, what with his pathetic vocal cords? He squawks compared to that
other man's tone."
_Hey_! Kenji thought in indignation.
It was silent again, this time longer. When he heard soft footsteps, he almost whisked back downstairs, until he heard Hiei give a derisive laughter.
"Running away again," he said darkly and it sounded menacing. "It's all you've been doing – you just keep running and lying."
"I'm not running," mumbled Karen and he heard things shifting, as if the smaller woman were digging around in her closet. "Kenji's waiting."
Hiei gave a harsh grunt, as if deeply annoyed.
"Don't act like that Hiei," pleaded Karen at the noise. "I know I've been going off a lot, but everyone just keeps wanting to go out – I'm just trying to –"
"You're using that as an excuse, an escape route to keep from telling me the truth." The
bedsprings creaked and a large shadow passed beneath the doorway. He heard Karen gasp. "Why do you keep lying to me? I've given you chances to come clean and yet you still continue to feed me these lies! You're hiding something."
"No I'm not."
"We're going to get this settled before I go back to work," threatened Hiei with a lilt of a growl.
Kenji waited for his friend's response, but it never came forth. Instead, there was the sound of something falling, a soft thud, and then, very quietly, a low, low moan.
"Hiei, no," whispered Karen. "I-I've been up here too long." "He can wait," he answered huskily.
There was the moan again, faint and sensual. Kenji's face heated up as he recognized that it had come from his friend. _Great_, he mouthed to himself. Now he had that little noise to
keep playing in his head for a while. He tiptoed back down the stairs and made his way to the living room couch with the greatest respect of a friend knowing when to disappear. He knew
they were going to be a few minutes, but he couldn't leave. It would be rude and he felt that Karen wanted to get away, as Hiei had suggested moodily.
That was the most he had ever heard the heartless demon say, but it answered his thoughts
from earlier. The two were in a serious relationship, enough that they were quarreling like any other couple and it sounded like it had been a constant squabble for some time. He could
hear the distress in his friend's voice, as she tiredly argued. There was a dangerous tone in Hiei's voice, one akin to something like jealousy.
But whatever it was, it apparently wasn't enough to thwart the passion between them. They
were lovers and it seemed odd to picture Hiei as anything but what he was – cruel. Evidently, he was different around Karen, and Kenji had a sneak peek into that from the hushed argument. Karen didn't seem afraid of Hiei, even if he was dangerous.
Kenji briefly remembered the fear of Kurama's voice as he ushered for everyone to flee inside his plant. There were startled yells of Hiei using his dragon, but he never saw anything. He heard a thunderous roar mixed with the wail of some tortured beast. The temple was trembling violently and it sounded like an intense thunderstorm beyond the plant's walls. He did,
however, see the brutal way Hiei had twisted Cain's clone's head until it snapped with ease. There was even a satisfied, sadistic smirk upon the tall demon's face after he glanced down at his dead opponent. As far as he could remember, Hiei had been the only one to defeat the clones. It hadn't been a pretty sight to witness such an event from his position across the room. Kenji had even hurried to look away in slight fear of the demon.
To Kenji, Hiei was a bastard through and through. To Karen, he was something else that he couldn't understand. He had to respect her decision for wanting to be with him. Still, he couldn't help shooting a wary glance at the much taller man. Kenji was just glad that Hiei was on their side.
Sighing, he leaned his head back and closed his eyes. As Karen's best friend, he was going to pretend to not have heard anything. She would have done the same for him if he had a
girlfriend. If she had problems, he would wait for her to tell him unless he felt that she needed comfort. Until then, he would soothe whatever was stressing her with his goofy self.
She needed it.
And later, he might ask why she mentioned him in that argument. If she was going to use him as a cover for something, he wanted to know. It would be nice to get a heads up with such
things in case Hiei decided to lead him down an alley and throttle him around to demand answers that his friend wasn't giving him.
For now, a lazy and fun-filled day was called for to cheer up his friend.
I was at a loss for what to do these days. My life was becoming chaotic in a mixture of good and bad that I was struggling to keep from diving headlong over this cliff. This precipice
was both crumbling and rebuilding in a constant war against itself.
My reunion with Hiei had been both confusing and erotic, but my relationship with him had
been that way since the beginning. My mind was reeling from what could have occurred against that tree in the forest. Every time I saw a tree, I was reminded of his bandaged hand beneath my skirt (and my panties that he had yet to give back, damn it). _That poor tree_, I thought.
It would have suffered through unwanted sex against it's innocent trunk and with no say in the matter.
We hadn't had any more intense encounters since that night three days ago. All we had time for were rash kisses because of the crowded house and my busy schedule of people wanting to spend time with me. There were only four of us, but the house seemed crowded these days as
Keiko and Yusuke were always present in whatever room I happened to be cleaning, brooding, or trying desperately to find some privacy.
Yusuke was also keeping me busy. It seemed like I was always rushing off on some errand with him to buy something for Keiko. He was grouchier these days to the point that I was beginning to suspect that he was purposely keeping me from having any alone time with Hiei. I think
Yusuke was extremely nervous with his child on the way and to combat such nerves, he was
unconsciously honing in on his instinctive parental authority. I wasn't his child, but I was the closest he could find to boss around and reprimand.
Aside from being slightly grumpy in the mornings, Keiko was still calm and loving. She had told me plenty of times that she was ready for a baby, which explained her blissful
happiness. While Yusuke was hounding me to take up more responsibilities, Keiko was
continuously assuring me that she was entirely capable of handling things. If anything, she wanted to keep busy. She refused to be coddled.
It was tug and pull between them. Yusuke was telling me to help. Keiko was telling me to go away. They were discreetly arguing over little things. Yusuke wanted Keiko to quit her job.
Keiko refused to do so, as accounting was not a danger to her health. Yusuke was trying to
run me ragged and Keiko was arguing to loosen the reigns. Back and forth, back and forth – it was making me dizzy.
Then there was Hiei.
Amidst every kiss in empty rooms, he would remember to ask about the phone call. At first, I thought it was jealousy as he heard the male voice, but there was an underlying tone to the question. But as for what, I didn't know. He only asked that one question and somehow, luck would intervene with another's presence, like Kenji's (I hope he didn't hear anything)
arrival the other day. I knew good fortune wouldn't always be kind to me, but it was
welcomed. It allowed me further time to figure out what to say when he hounded me with the
harsh questions again. I didn't like to lie to him, but I had to.
I was also trying to figure out what to do in keeping myself from caving in to my hormones.
He wanted unprotected sex and for the life of me, I couldn't scold myself against the idea. I had counted the time for the birth control to kick in and I had less than two weeks to go. It would all be smooth sailing from that point – if I could fight the temptation against his
smoldering eyes.
But the problem was getting him to listen. I wanted to give him everything, but he just
needed to wait a little longer. I knew he wouldn't use protection. I heard the authority in his voice when he denied my request for protection. The first time could be all it takes for a baby. I was reminded of the older girls at the orphanage that had run off with their
growing stomachs.
I was thinking too much since coming back from the temple because my responsibilities were
becoming more than I could handle. It was affecting my relationship with Hiei. He only had to look at me and know that something was wrong. I didn't want to hurt him with what he may find to be betrayal. He gave me plenty of warnings throughout our relationship that any dishonesty was not tolerated and yet, dishonesty was the card I had to keep holding up.
His demon instincts were going to kick in soon. I had seen a glimmer of it in his eyes when he approached me the first night. My refusal to answer him honestly and the long wait of
refusing to sleep with him were going to end his patience. It was bound to snap. It was something I knew that would always be present in our relationship. All the warnings of a
human threatening demon instincts had been made and I had to accept any times they happened – even Yukina couldn't control herself when such times happened and it had caused her to bite
Kuwabara. Hiei's quick kisses in darkened hallways and empty rooms were much harsher now…
The crunch of gravel pierced through my thoughts and I peeked out my window. Yusuke was
backing up the car. Tonight, he and Keiko were going to spend time together, hopefully to settle their petty arguments. Without their presence, the house was buzzing with peace and
quiet. My eyes closed at the light atmosphere as I stood there basking in the moonlight from the window.
With a much-needed sigh, my hands went to the zipper of my skirt. I had spent the majority of the day with Atsuko, but now I was going to throw on my comfy clothes and sleep like the
dead. All of this thinking and worrying was ripping my head apart. I was slowly growing more stressed with each passing day and drowning in my own dilemmas.
The zipper was halfway down when I realized that I was alone, truly alone, for the first time with Hiei.
No, I had known he was here, but why should it bother me that we were alone? We had been
alone for an hour the other day before Kenji arrived. All we had done was argue, but then he backhanded my purse to the side with his haunting eyes. I had felt somewhat embarrassed to
making out with him while Kenji hovered down below, afraid that he might hear the moans Hiei seemed desperate to elicit with sharp bites and roaming hands.
Only, tonight felt different, almost alive with some sort of energy. It was skimming along the twittering peace, as if this strange force were seeking its next meal. I had been
shivering when Yusuke and Keiko bid goodbye, reminded me to clean the kitchen (Yusuke), and said they'd be in late as they were seeing this live band downtown in Tokyo. But I hadn't
been shivering from the cold…
That peaceful humming in the air stretched taut like cutting wire. My mouth felt dry, but my body, my very _skin_, was flushing with an astounding amount of heat. There was the sound of heavy footsteps and my heart thrummed chaotically at the growing heat of the person
approaching my room. The doorknob twisted loudly and I hurried to zip my skirt back up.
Hiei pushed open the door and his eyes zeroed in on my fumbling fingers. "You knew the moment they left, I was coming in here," he closed the door behind him, "so why the hell are you
zipping that back up?"
I was surprised that the first words out of his mouth hadn't been laced with his suspicious questions regarding the phone call. He was immediately asking for my skirt off in a voice
that was husky and deep, deeper than normal and almost on the verge of a hidden growl. His tone was coated darkly and sent a soft jolt of pleasure throughout my body. _Dear god_, I thought wildly. _What is he doing to me with his voice?_
"Because we can't," I answered softly, wincing when his jaw hardened. It was a lie, a
strained lie. Zipping my skirt, I unconsciously crept behind my desk chair to use it as a makeshift barrier against him.
"_Why_?" His voice was icy and the one word dripped with anger.
Because it had worked a few times already, I blurted, "I'm not ready –"
He had a lot of self-control, but my words were yet again, another lie, as all it took was
his presence for my body to come alive. I should have said something else. I should just talk to him, except all we ever did was fight. My sentence had died abruptly when his jaw muscles tightened, very, very slowly. I saw his chest expand as he inhaled deeply and my thighs
instinctively pressed against one another as the same electricity spread from my stomach and down…
He exhaled.
I exhaled.
"_I don't want you to be frightened, Karen, but he's going to be a little unstable," whispered Kurama._
I trembled slightly at the eerie warning, for Hiei's eyes had darkened through a series of crimson colors from bloody red to blackish maroon. My thighs pressed together tightly, as I remembered his words from that first night. He said he could smell me. I hadn't understood
what he meant by that at the time, but I knew now – he could smell me again. I was horrified at what I smelled like to him and self-consciously trying to hide it with tightly pressed
legs.
But he responded darkly to it when he closed the door behind him. There was a soft 'click' from the lock sliding into place. It reverberated in the dim light of my room.
"Hiei?" I whispered in an attempt to soothe the primitive way he was stalking towards me. His footsteps didn't falter. "Hiei…?"
_Jet's serious voice rumbled like thunder. "Demons have instincts too strong for a human to understand."_
The aura rolling off of him was animalistic, one of a male animal needing to brand the closest female as his and his alone. I was the fighting mate that kept pushing off his
advances, as I protectively guarded my virginity no matter how eagerly my body responded to him. It was too late to salvage myself now with soft touches or heated kisses. I had lost
that chance. He was a fully-grown demon and I, the silly human girl that had shunned away all warnings. This was an ancient ritual and my innocence would be claimed by this alpha male.
When he neared me, my neck craned back to meet the savage look in his eyes. Without any shoes on or the heels that I had taken to wearing lately, I had forgotten how tall he was.
Amazingly, he seemed even taller than before and it emphasized his powerful build. I always overlooked his strength, how easily he could hurt me. I was practically staring straight up
at him as he towered over me. I felt small and helpless, completely defenseless against him – but I didn't fear him. I feared his instincts.
I backed up against the desk as he swept aside the desk chair with a flick of his hand. The power behind that hand sent the chair flying against one of my dressers where it shattered into pieces. Knocking against my desk with a gasp, I brushed up against the lamp behind me.
It wobbled dangerously and I had just enough sense to reach for it. My hands jerked to right the lamp, but I pulled too hard. The already stretched cord yanked from the socket down below and the light flickered off. The entire room was nearly pitch black as moonlight added a hint of luminosity through the cracks of the blinds.
His arm wrapped around me and jerked me up against his body, plastering me completely against
him from breast to hip. The lamp clattered upon the desktop with a sharp ringing and equally loud thud of wood. He lifted me up enough to carry me towards the bed with just that one
powerful arm, as if I weighed nothing.
I didn't fight him. I knew not to this time, as it would be futile. I simply prepared myself mentally to not hate him for the savagery of him taking my innocence. I couldn't hate him.
It was my own fault.
I went strutting around in these clothes, parading beneath his nose, as if tempting a bull
with the flash of a red cape. He never said anything about my outfits, but his eyes followed me continuously since his arrival. I hesitantly accepted that as a silent approval that he
liked my new attire.
Yet I kept saying no, no, and no. I was his mate. Hiei had said I was _his_ mate. He had said that when I was ready, he wasn't stopping. He knew I was ready, but I stopped him anyways. He had given me fair warning – and I had to accept him now, as it was my responsibility to this demon that had chosen me.
Caged against him with that one arm, I could barely breathe. My breaths came out in strained gasps against his neck. Hiei didn't kiss me. We weren't even looking at each other, but I was aware of his strong hand as he reached down to grab the back of my left knee. His hand yanked up, bringing my knee up to his hip. The bandages rasped along my skin like that first night. Nails raked along my outer thigh and toward my hip in a barely restrained way – it was almost painful, but had me trembling against him while I stared over his shoulder with wide eyes.
Long fingers curled around the band of my underwear at my hip and he pulled violently with a low growl. The fabric burned briefly like quickly placed scratches as the once pretty silk
panties ripped away.
That was the only piece of clothing he removed because it was all this dominant demon needed to remove. He kept his knee between my legs as we fell back against the bed to keep me from closing up, but I wasn't going to stop him. Hiei's hands jerked my skirt to my waist and his other knee joined the one between thighs. Harshly he nudged them apart wide enough for the
width of his hips, leaving me breathless in fear and shame. I watched his face, wishing he'd look at me, but he was only focused on my body.
Those burning hands slipped under my thighs and pulled them up. A heated blush splashed
against my cheeks when I felt him touching me down in a place I had never been touched before since infancy. My eyes widened at the moistness there and I was mortified at what he was
thinking. I was unprepared for the lean finger that pressed a tad inside me, almost as if he was checking me. I whimpered in fear and brief pleasure because it was such a sensitive area. But it didn't last long, only a slight second. Then he was guiding himself –
And it all happened very fast. Everything had been a blur from the moment he hauled me up. I was breathless at the rashness of this intimate act. I didn't know what to do. He never told me. He never said a word. He was roughly leading me in a game that I had no preparation for –
There was immense pressure between my legs and it was blazing with intense heat. But it moved too quickly for me to dwell on it. A second was all it took for him to enter me completely
and I couldn't help the pained scream that tore from my throat.
That was the only scream I allowed to escape my lips. I refused to acknowledge the pain with any more wounded screams. Tears clouded my vision at the intensity of his thrusts, but I
desperately held them back by clutching at the sheets on either side of me. His hands left my thighs and braced against the mattress near my ribs where they pushed deeply into the bed.
I waited for the pain to abide, that agonizing pressure and searing heat, but it didn't let up. There was a flicker of pleasure, a little light, at the end of each plunge. That was it.
It kept retreating at the quick rhythm. The small stabs of pleasure was all that kept me from screaming too loudly.
This was painful. The too full sensation was unbearable, sweeping me along without mercy.
Despite my refusal to keep from screaming, I couldn't help it. My cries were increasing in
volume, surging up to answer every raspy growl and the low groans above me. I tried to tough it out and wait for him to finish, but my trembling hands were reaching up to clutch at his
shirt.
"_Please_," I begged breathlessly, hoping he could hear me. "_Please, you have to slow down_!"
My words and cries must have broken through because there was a moment of hesitancy. It was brief, as things had gone too far for him to stop. But he was guilty. The raging instincts
had died and he gave a strained, low grunt, as if to apologize. I knew he was guilty from the way he tried to change the pace to something more gentle. He moved slower and his hands were under my bottom, correctly lifting me up against him. It was a last minute attempt and just
enough to chase away the pain at the end.
My head started spinning and I wrapped my arms around him, giving my first pleasured moans.
Those last few thrusts had me arching against him and his mouth swallowed up my blissful cries. But it was short lived as my body was too far gone and too new in this sacred act,
that the brief moment of what should have been intense pleasure ended before I could cling to it. All I got were the blurred beams of a far off light, which he tried to prolong with his
feverish lips.
As the fleeting carnality left, my energy felt whisked away. A wave of fatigue settled over me and my eyelids fluttered. Instinctively, I knew it was the connection. It was draining my energy.
I was still holding him when he gave a harsh cry against my shoulder. It was such an
erogenous sound and filled with the release of intense pleasure, that I was stunned by it. He was always in control of his emotions, keeping to himself, but that wild abandonment was
there in his husky voice and released so fiercely against my shoulder that it made me shiver. My cheeks colored as he hissed my name into my ear in such way that it made me dizzy. Rough, burning hands went to my hips, holding me there as he ground against me with barely
restrained grunts. Instinctively, I held him to me tightly as something hot, liquid hot, surged inside of me and I arched fiercely at the intensity of it.
He collapsed on top of me, as if weighed down by great fatigue. The darkened room was filled with our harsh breathing and I stared up drowsily at the ceiling. I should have protested his heavy weight, but I just cradled him lazily. Strangely exhausted, my eyes closed to the soft kisses against my neck.
I fell asleep as his lips meant mine shakily.
…
…
…
When I awakened, my internal clock told me I had slept several hours. At first, I simply remained there with a bleary gaze up at the shadowy ceiling. It took me a few moments to
realize that there was a warm body half-sprawled on top of me. More aware, I turned my head
and came face-to-face with Hiei's resting face. His hot breath ghosted across my lips, mixing intimately with my own breath, as our faces were mere centimeters apart.
Then, I felt the aches, especially between my legs. It was throbbing immensely. The memories of how such soreness came to be made my face flush with embarrassment. Dimly, I could hear
the sounds from last night inside my head. There was the sound of bed springs creaking, rustled clothing, rough growls, and my echoing cries, all just mixing repeatedly, like flickering radio stations.
We had rough, raw sex.
_Rough sex indeed_, I grimaced. We didn't even get fully undressed, as I was entirely covered save my underwear, which was lying in tatters somewhere. I doubt I could even walk in single line without stifled moans. It was a good thing I didn't drive, because if I was pulled over and tested to walk along the yellow paint, I would fail miserably. It would be embarrassing
to blurt out to the officer of why I was wobbling dangerously without the accompanying intoxication levels that should warrant such behavior.
I never expected us to be passionate with sex. I highly doubt there was going to be amusing, throaty laughter or intense snuggling where I said 'that was really good' and he answered,
mockingly, 'of course it was, little fool', as if I could ever doubt his experienced ways. I knew the first time would be painful from the hushed stories I heard around school or from
any older girls at the orphanage before they lit out on their own. I just didn't think it was going to be _that_ painful.
I wasn't going to die. I knew that at some point during the first thrust. But I realized if I hadn't have been ready down there it would have been an entirely different story. My wetness had attracted him in the first place since he could smell it. It was still somewhat
embarrassing that just his presence, voice, and sexual appeal could cause such a response to my body.
But it was done with. I had sex with him and it wasn't at all that big of a deal. There was a slight disappointment inside my chest because I had wished for the first time to be… I don't know – magical and beautiful. Instead, there was just that hint of pleasure near the end
amidst all the discomfort of his sheer size. Yet, I think the next time it would be
different. With a little practice, I might get the full color spectrum instead of a few scattered rays.
For now, the _next_ time was going to have to wait until this soreness let up. From how he
had reacted near the end, I knew he would wait. He wasn't cruel. I didn't hate him. I didn't regret what happened between us. I did regret my naïve ways, as they had pushed him too far.
Just because it had been painful, none of that changed my feelings for him. I still loved
him. There were risks to being involved with a demon and sacrifices that I would always make
– this was just one of them that should have been unnecessary if I hadn't kept pushing him away with lies that I wasn't ready.
Giving a tiny sigh, I wiggled slightly to the side to ease away from him. His arm was thrown over my waist and a long leg was still settled between mine. A bit of his body rested along my left side and I fathomed that he must have shifted enough to keep from smothering me. I
tried to be discreet, as I didn't want to wake him, but his muscles coiled and a sleepy grunt puffed against my neck.
Shyly, I kept my head turned away as he lazily pushed himself up. He hovered there for a
moment and I could feel the heat of his eyes, but things were awkward. The intimacy between us should have chased away my embarrassment, but it was there and heating up my face.
Allowing him to enter my body, letting him get so close, where no one else had been before, made me feel extremely exposed and insecure. I think I would always be that shy girl around him because he rarely told me what he was thinking. Brief hesitancy was a constant for me in our relationship.
When he removed his leg and lifted his arm, I rolled over with a slight frown. My body was
stiff and the soreness made it a bit of a struggle to push myself up. It felt like the first day with Genkai where she had immediately put me through the task of running up and down
those blasted stairs. Actually, I think the after effects of Genkai's hardcore training were more painful than this as I had had to soak in a bath full of ice to alleviate my muscles.
This soreness was greatly different from Genkai's killer exercise aches, as I was definitely swollen down _there_, but it was tolerable.
Yet, the aches were strong enough to make a soft whimper slip from my mouth. Embarrassingly, I gritted my teeth to keep such noises from surging forth again. I focused on sliding my legs off the bed and setting my feet onto the floor. Then, I just sat there and stared at the
ground. There was no way I was going to humiliate myself by attempting to walk in front of him. I just needed time to let the stiffness settle before wobbling toward the bathroom
across the hall.
The first ray of sunlight began peeping through the blinds and lit up several spots upon the floor. And to my horror, one beam landed on my tattered white panties. If I was close enough,
I would kick them away from the light. It was as if the sun were trying to illuminate the
clues of our deed. I really liked those panties, too. My panties were taking a beating lately and were down two. If this kept up, I was going to have to go shopping again.
Ignoring the torn fabric, I glanced at my lap and once again, blushed. I had never reddened
this much in my entire life. Usually, the blushes were fleeting, as they never lasted long. I was always able to beat away my reddened cheeks and keep the flush at bay. But the reason for my colored cheeks now was how bunched up my skirt was, that my naked flesh was almost
completely exposed. I fumbled to push my skirt down. I didn't feel like looking at _that_ or showing it to the world, not with how it was throbbing.
My skirt was ripped up one side and red strings were swaying in the soft glow of light at my thigh. I traced the tear until it stopped near the thick band around my waist. It was such a cute skirt, but it was now going to have to end up in the trash.
The bed shifted beneath me and I glanced sideways without lifting my head up. Hiei was
settling next to me, leaving just enough space to keep from touching me. I would have met his eyes, but I probably looked a mess. My hair was most likely matted with dry sweat and
scattered in tangles. I didn't feel presentable enough to meet his observant eyes.
A warm hand touched my lower back and I tensed lightly at the tentative pressure. I didn't mean to react that way. It had to be the heat of his hand, but even as told myself that, I kept remembering the pain of being stretched to the point that I screamed my lungs out.
Immediately, he retracted his hand, as if he were burned by my t-shirt. I chased away those memories with a brutal mental slap and concentrated on never flinching from him again.
It was extremely awkward for the next few minutes where we simply sat in silence and watched the light pouring in through the cracks of the shades. I had never watched the sunrise before with him, but this was a strange circumstance to be doing so now. We couldn't even see the
sun. It was just light dancing onto the floor (and on my panties) and a red hue brightening the white, horizontal blinds.
Knowing I needed to assure him I was fine, I opened my mouth to speak until the bed trembled. It was the vibration of a phone somewhere behind us. My phone was on my desk and was set with a cheery jingle, so it must be his cell. I waited for him to grab up the device, but he
didn't move.
Turning to him, I stared at the side of his face. He was staring straight ahead with an
unreadable expression, but with how stiffly he was sitting, I knew he was guilt-ridden for
his actions. Rigidly, I turned to search for his phone and found the slim object just behind me.
"It's probably important," I whispered while holding out the phone.
My voice was a little hoarse and I cleared my throat quietly before saying his name. He
didn't even appear to hear me. Scooting towards him, I reached for his hand. Turning his palm up, I pressed the phone there while saying, firmly, "Hiei, answer your phone."
He glanced at me for the first time and my face heated up, as I remembered his harsh groans and my echoing screams again. Bashfully lowering my eyes, I stood up on shaky legs when he lifted the phone to his ear. I thought he would ignore me once he answered the phone, but I
could feel his intense gaze. I ignored the twinges of pain between my legs and forced myself to walk across the room to give him some privacy.
Having slept so long, all throughout the night (did I even move?), my legs were quivering with fatigue and aches. There was wetness at the corner of my eyes, as I wanted to cry. It was from the fluttering of various emotions and pain zipping along my body. I remembered
crying after my first day of training from all the soreness of my muscles and Jet had sat
with me while awkwardly patting my head, which only made it worse because my head throbbed, too. I'd probably have a good cry later during the handful of warm baths to soothe the lower half my body. This time there wasn't anybody to give me that awkward pat on the head. I was going to have to tough this out alone because it was entirely too private to share with
anyone. Whom was I going to seek comfort from anyways when everyone kept warning me and regarded Hiei with accusing eyes?
I hated being clumsy, especially now. Four steps across the room and I went teetering to the side. I barely even brushed past the bed, but a muscular arm wrapped around my waist. Meeting Hiei's eyes cautiously, I was mortified at what he might be thinking. He was still holding
the phone to his ear, but he was staring down at me with those impassive eyes. Carefully, he
led me back to the bed and lowered me down until I was sitting at the edge of the mattress.
"What do you need," he asked slowly as he lowered the phone and completely ignored the person speaking on the other end.
Fingering the hem of my shirt, I stuttered out nervously, "… a c-change of clothes. I wanted to take a bath."
He nodded and headed across the room, but paused midway. When he turned around, he gave me an odd look. Amazingly, I knew what it was he was silently asking. He wanted to know what
exactly it was he needed to get.
"Just grab anything in the first three drawers." I pointed at the dresser.
He returned to his task without another word. Silently, I watched him shift the phone back to his ear and tilt his head to hold it with his shoulder. Before he opened the drawers, there
was the sound of metal teeth clashing together quietly. I almost cleared my throat. He was zipping up his pants.
I guess he doesn't need to talk on the phone because Hiei never said a word to the caller. He just listened while searching through the drawers. At one point, he made an unusual, low
grunt when he pulled open my underwear drawer. He seemed to be slightly stunned, because he rubbed a hand over his face. It was embarrassing to have him looking through my underwear, but they were decent pieces. I didn't have anything strange in there besides lace and silk.
It's not as if I had thongs slinking around in there, as that would have added to my humiliation.
Clothes in hand, he reached up and ended the phone call. Slipping his phone in his pocket, he walked over to my door and unlocked it. I was going to ask where he was going, but he was
already striding across the hall. A few seconds later, I heard running water coming from the bathroom.
He came back moments later sans my clothes. I noticed that his footsteps were measured, as if he were trying not to approach me too quickly. When he neared, he was reaching for me, but
strangely enough, jerked back just before touching me. He seemed to be contemplating whether to pick me up and kept his hands held out loosely toward me. Deciding for him, I lifted my
arms up toward him in a silent sign for him to carry me. Almost cautiously, he slipped an arm around my waist and his other beneath my knees. I was surprised at how gently he lifted me
up, but I wound my arms around his neck with complete trust.
He carried me to the bathroom and I worried that Yusuke or Keiko might come barreling from their room, but their door remained firmly shut. The house was silent save for the water
pouring in the bathroom. Briefly, I wondered when the other couple had arrived home and if
they noticed anything unusual – but I suppose not. Otherwise, I doubt we would have slept so soundly.
Inside the bathroom, I saw the water filling up the tub. My eyes widened at the fact that he had started a bath for me. After he lowered me onto the seat of the toilet, he leaned over
and checked the temperature of the water with his hand. I was still in a daze at what he had done.
Streaming water splashed against the liquid surface filling the tub. It was loud in the
bathroom, like a thunderous roar. Once it was high enough, he deftly twisted the faucets and remained sitting on his heels.
Silence.
More silence.
Then, he broke it with his smooth voice. "I'll be back in a few hours."
Because everything was awkward and had been awkward since I awakened, I merely mumbled, "okay."
He stared up at me and appeared ready to say something, but then thought better of it. He
stood up and headed out of the bathroom. The door closed quietly behind me and I eyed the door numbly. In the silence of the bathroom, I heard a shower starting down below.
Leaning forward, I massaged my temples at the strained situation.
He messed everything up.
Throughout the entire morning meetings, his mind had only been on one person. The scenes of last night kept playing repeatedly inside his head. The pleasure had been intense, mind
blowing, but it was half lived because of the pained screams that kept echoing inside his head.
He had never lost control before, not like how he had last night. The only time Hiei had was at the temple when his mark was altered, but he had been able to reign in his instincts. This time, it all snapped without warning. It happened out of nowhere.
He had been pissed for days at her denial to give him his answers. He had been aggravated at her dishonesty and every lie she uttered. He had been sexual frustrated as she moved around him with all the grace of an exquisite goddess. Hiei had nearly gone insane when they were
interrupted the first night and he was ready to incinerate the guard that approached them. Fuck, he had been sexually frustrated for over a year and all for the one woman that kept pushing him away.
When he smelled her arousal, all sense of control left him. His body had grown tight with
need. He couldn't stand it anymore when there was an aroused, very aroused, female standing there before him in a tiny skirt. Yet, despite the need to have her, he knew he had to stop, but his mind and body wouldn't let him.
He had waited too long. He had waited for over a year for her and now that she was radiating such a startling amount of sexual appeal, he had to fight every day to keep from pushing her against the nearest wall. Only, it wasn't the sexual frustration that had finally pushed him overboard. He had forced himself from giving into his sexual needs in respect to her naivety.
Her dishonesty had been slowly leading him away from his disciplined ways. Hiei didn't
understand why she was suddenly lying to him, but she had done so since his arrival. Karen
was stubbornly guarding her secrets and it aggravated him, as she had never acted distrustful of him. If there was anything she had hidden, she would admit to it – but this time she was
cleverly distracting him with her lovely body and taking advantage of the multitude of people that kept, unknowingly, butting in.
At first, there was a flare of jealousy when he first heard the deep voice booming from her phone. With how she was dressed, this new sexiness she was radiating, he briefly imagined
that she was messing around with another man. He was almost suspicious in her change of wardrobe and pondered if she was even the same woman – but she was. He found that out
immediately when she had clumsily corrected herself when he teased her for yelling the wrong name.
Despite the sexy display of skin, his innocent mate was still clumsy and awkward. It chased away his brief doubts of any affairs. He highly doubted Karen had it in her to go messing
around with anyone else, as he had burned the warning of his mark into her head.
Hiei had caught the last of her conversation, but it hadn't revealed much. He knew she had been to Spirit World to confirm the completion of her training, but Hiei had feeling that that was a carefully worked lie. Unfortunately, he was under oath to keep from using his
jagan on any allies. He hardly was one for orders, but he had a bargain to fulfill until his work with Mukuro was done. When his mate mentioned that she had signed the necessary
documents, he had lifted a brow. The news had matched the story fed to him in Spirit World.
Yet, there was something else in her eyes. She was hiding something. He knew it. How many hours of the day had he spent just watching her? He was aware of every flicker of emotion that flashed across those beautiful eyes. His mate was up to something and knowing her, it couldn't be good.
In truth, he had gone up to her room to tempt her out of her clothes. She had pushed him away for too long and his needs for that beautiful woman were maddening. Hiei had never wanted a
woman more than he wanted Karen. He had never desired a woman before – he had simply had his choice among the women in both worlds.
She was different from before and it was both good and bad. She walked differently, moving with slow, sure steps that had her hips moving just the right way. That body was altered,
too. She had been beautiful when he left her and when he came back, she was sexy beautiful – something that shouldn't be possible. Once slim legs were now toned to perfection and he
didn't know how that could have come to be when she had only been training her mind. His
mate's hair was longer, near her lower back, and just hinting for his eyes to zero in on her luscious backside. Even that soft voice was attractive and he wondered how he could have ever thought it just pleasant. It was sultry and low, but entirely innocent. He wanted his name to roll off that sweet tongue of hers.
And she was unconscious to the intense sexuality that she was giving off – she didn't know
that she was driving him wild with those hips, voice, and every tiny trait on her figure. The once clumsy girl was a grown woman with a killer body.
She also had such a beautiful feminine scent. If he had thought, she smelled delicious
before, it was nothing compared to her steaming arousal. Her natural perfume was heady and
sweet. He couldn't pinpoint such aroma, only that it was uniquely hers and filled his entire body with fire.
For the last month, Hiei had worked to exercise his self-control. He had hardened himself again and convinced himself to be the cold-hearted demon he once was. He didn't need
softness. He didn't need any more weaknesses besides what he had in his obsession with his mate. He had told himself that when he went back to Human World that any gentleness he
displayed with that woman was going to end – there would be no more of it.
She was simply a beautiful woman and the only reason he was obsessed with her was because of her beauty. That would all end once he fucked her. She needed to learn that she was _his_
mate, that when he wanted her, there was no denying him. He had been too soft with her and allowed her the freedom to keep shoving him away. He shouldn't have given her that control over him because she executed it to a tee.
However, all that discipline he had forced back into his deadened heart shattered when she
walked into that office. His self-discipline kept shattering, too, with each day that passed.
It wasn't just her body. It was the honesty in her eyes and words when she greeted him so
sincerely. He didn't understand how she could easily claw at his defenses. It happened every time.
Dimly, he could remember the fear in her eyes when the chair shattered in her room. She
wanted him, but his demon rage frightened her desire. He was blinded with rage that she was lying again, but he also responded dangerously to her scent. Then, all his frustrations fled away as soon as he sheathed himself inside that tight body.
She had to be tighter than demon women were – she was tighter than any woman he had been with and he couldn't stand it. Those little inner muscles just wrapped around him deliciously.
Demons were made to breed and his size was enthralled with her moist heat and tightness.
The astounding amount of pleasure was spiraling through him unlike anything he felt before, but when her pained voice cried up at him, he automatically heeded her demand. If she had
told him to stop, he would have, but all she said was to slow down. It began hitting him. The screams that had not been there in his enraged, lust-filled mind were thundering in his head. He was too far into the pleasure to stop, but if she had told him once he was aware, he would have – but why hadn't she?
She was inexperienced. She had never been touched by a man and he had taken her with such
brutal force, that he hurt her with his body. It wasn't supposed to be like that. He wanted her, but he hadn't wanted her first time to be violent. She trusted him not to hurt her and he had done so by taking her virginity without mercy.
Hiei was supposed to guide her, as he had done since the beginning. Yet, he hadn't even
removed all her clothes and taken the time to soothe her embarrassment at being naked beneath
him. She may dress in tight, sexy outfits, but she was still his awkward and self-conscious mate. He could remember now the terror in her wide, blue eyes as he touched her intimately for the first time. It hadn't even lasted long. His hormone driven body had just roughly
checked to see if she was ready enough for him and being so responsive, she was.
She hadn't known what to do or what to expect, and he had ruined it with her. He didn't take the time to let her get used to him. He didn't allow any time for her to adjust at all.
She was so small compared to him in both size and weight. He had to be very careful with her the first time, he knew that, but all he did was tear into her.
For the first time, in a long time, she had flinched away from him. He couldn't explain the torture that went exploding inside him at that one reaction. She bravely tried to be strong.
She hadn't cried. But the way she moved and her whispered cry sent hot guilt flooding into his cold heart.
He had hurt again. Why was he always hurting that little woman? Why didn't she tell him to stop? She was the only one that seemed able to calm him down. All she had done was plea for him to slow down when she should have said stop. She hadn't even put up a fight. Throughout the constant pain, she let him take her without a single protest, save for her lie in the
beginning. He should have just turned away…
Why did he care anyways? Hiei got what he wanted after a year of waiting. He had warned her that he wouldn't stop once she was ready. She was his and now that he had her, he couldn't let her go. She was beautiful and mating with her had been unlike anything he could have
imagined. It had been so intense that the connection between them had even drained his
energy, as if he had used his dragon multiple times. He had literally been drained and unable to move once he shifted enough of his weight off of her to allow her to breathe.
One of the guards was talking and when Hiei looked up tiredly, all he saw was that woman laughing beneath him when they were buried within the pile of leaves long ago.
He's a damn liar! _A few hours later_, I thought angrily. It was nearing midnight and there was no sign of him anywhere.
Since Hiei left (to Spirit World, I later found out), I spent my day moving about to loosen my muscles. The bath this morning helped and lounging in the t-shirt and shorts Hiei had
chosen (embarrassing enough, he had even picked out my panties and bra), I was able to move about.
Yusuke had left for Spirit World later, too. I found out that he and Keiko had arrived home
sometime around two in the morning. They were actually quite chipper this morning compared to the bickering arguments between them this past week.
Keiko had tried to get me to go grocery shopping with but her I refused. I was able to keep from wobbling in her presence, but doing so in public would take greater effort. I didn't
feel like going anywhere that didn't have a chair or sturdy surface nearby. So, I waited for a few hours and he remained away in his meetings.
Not one for sitting around, I tended to the mess in my room. I had bled last night, but not a lot. A majority of it ended up on the back of my skirt, as it hadn't been bunched up with the front. There was blood on my bedspreads and I was ashamed at the sight of it. I ended up
washing everything. I threw away my ruined clothes. I did away with the pieces of wood on my floor. Remarkably, I found the same chair in the storage room, as my chair had been an extra dining room chair. Hopefully, Yusuke or Keiko won't notice it missing.
When I was all done, I took another bath – this time filled with bubbles. Alone in the house, I bowed my head and cried.
There were many emotions running wild inside my head. For some reason, I was ashamed at what had happened. I was stunned that we had sex. I had sex with Hiei, a demon that had acted cold towards me in the beginning. I would never have imagined I'd end up with him. I had only been
that girl he was annoyingly bound to with no way out. Now we had done something together that kept making me blush every five seconds. There were feelings of slight happiness because he
had wanted me. I was hurting in a place that rarely saw the light of day. I felt alone, entirely alone. I wanted someone to just hold me, but they would ask questions. I was
confused at everything.
And I was scared that Hiei wouldn't want me anymore.
I don't know where that fear came from – it may have been a mixture of his actions last night and the awkwardness of this morning. He had only said two sentences to me. My expectations of sex were sixty percent pain, thirty-five percent humiliation, and five percent pleasure. But what was he expecting? He wanted me enough that his instincts took over when I pushed him
away. Yet, he only removed my panties, as if my body wasn't appealing. I tried to tell myself that it was his instincts, but there was a wave of embarrassment for my figure now. There was also a fear to refrain from pushing him over the edge again. I didn't want the second time to be like that or any other time, but I was now kind of wary of sex in general.
It was all confusing.
But now I was annoyed that he was still gone.
Despite what I felt and what had happened, I wanted him here with me. Instead, he was gone. Usually, I never questioned or fume when he overruns his meeting times. I didn't bother him with anything, really. I calmly accepted that he was a busy demon and had more important
things to attend to than me, like saving the world. I knew he was extremely busy in Demon World training up the increase of demons for the expansion of the border patrol. Not only that, but he was also working with the more experience members of the patrol and creating safe spots for incoming priestesses.
His overwhelming schedule was also, what made me feel guilty for sneaking around behind his back. He was doing so many things to keep me from visiting the temples and I was doing
everything I could to visit said temples.
I was kind of hoping that now that we had sex, it might change his attitude. I had wanted to wait until my birth control kicked in, but now that it was done with, it changed things. I
didn't even want to think about birth control and all the what ifs anymore. I was tired of fighting. I was tired of thinking. If he wants sex, then I wasn't going to protest anymore. I'll just go along with it and handle whatever happens.
"_Don't wait up. Getting dragged into extra meetings happens." Yusuke shrugged and handed me his dirty plate. "I once stayed overnight – actually, I just fell asleep in one of the rooms. I told Keiko that I had these situations on my lands, but really I went to asleep and no one woke me up." Frowning, he hurriedly demanded, "don't tell her that. I mean it."_
I stared at the kitchen clock. I glared at the time. It was five after midnight. It was the next day and he wasn't here. I knew in my gut that he was avoiding me. I'm a wreck of a mess and his absence is making me mad. I have all this stuff on my plate. All I want is to forget all the arguments and responsibilities, and just be with him as we were in Shirakawa-go.
I know he's guilty, but why is he purposely avoiding me? It's not as if I stopped him. If he's guilty, then he should be sitting here with me in that awkward silence again.
Crossing my arms, I glanced over at the dinner I had saved him. It was now cold… again. I had always saved his meals for him when he went to any unexpected meetings during the few days he had been here (when are they going to fix those communicators?). If he was going to be more
than a few hours late, then the least he could have done was called. "He never calls me," I grumbled to myself.
I never call him either, except for that one time at the movie theaters. At that thought, I turned to my cellphone on the kitchen counter. Easing myself out of the chair, as sitting so long had stiffened me again, I grabbed my phone. I wonder if he had the same number.
Shrugging, I pressed the little phone beside his name. It rang quietly.
It didn't ring long, only twice before the dial tone was lifted on the other end. I thought
maybe he quit the call and a voicemail was going to pick up. His end was entirely silent, but I had a feeling he was listening.
"Are you ever going to come home," I asked quietly. When he didn't answer, I scowled at the
ticking clock. The minute hand was inching toward the six. I never nagged him, but I couldn't help saying rather coldly, "Yusuke came home _hours_ ago and said your meetings were done
with. I realize that those can change, but you know I always have your meals waiting for you. The least you can do is call me if your meetings are longer than 'a few hours'." I was trying hard not to yell into the phone. I didn't want to wake the others up. "It's not that hard to make a three second call, say you're late, and then hang up." He wasn't responding. "Fine," I glared at his untouched dinner that I had made. "I'm not waiting up for you any longer, you
goddamn liar!"
Just before I ended the call, his dark voice came through, "I'll be there in half an hour."
Remembering what he had said earlier, I said, rather angrily, "you better not be late again." I hung up.
I waited a good ten minutes before heating up his meal… again (he better not complain about the overheated taste). Setting it out on the table, I sat down and rested my head on my
folded arms. A few minutes later, I heard a car pulling into the driveway. Since there was no more truck or bike, Hiei had bought a car. I didn't really know anything about cars, but it
was nice and sleek. The blue, two-door vehicle was kind of sporty.
Glancing at the clock, I timed his arrival. He was eight minutes early. Satisfied, I rested
my chin on my crossed arms and stared at the far wall. The front door opened and closed. Keys were rattling softly along with steady footsteps. The kitchen door slid open, but I didn't
glance over at him. The chair perpendicular to me was pulled back and he seated himself quietly.
Silence.
More silence.
"I bet you haven't eaten all day, have you," I muttered.
In his presence for the first time since he left me this morning, I was feeling nervous now.
Peeking over at him, I saw him staring down at his food. I didn't know what to do. He wouldn't talk to me. Maybe I should just go mourn in my room –
"… Come here."
At the request, I stared at him. He held a hand out toward me. Breathless, I placed my hand
in his and he pulled gently. I tried not to wince when I stood up, but it was noticeable. His red eyes flashed. He was hardly holding my hand, as if I were going to break at the slightest pressure. Today had been the first time for such gentleness and I was both trying to commit
the acts to memory and keep from doing anything stupid. He pulled me toward him and unconsciously, I settled across his lap.
Unused to such affection, I was unsure of how to act. His bandaged arm was around my waist to keep me from falling and his other hand was rubbing at my outer thigh. There was nothing
sensual about his touch. It was almost as if he were lightly massaging me. The heat of his palm was actually very soothing and my tired body relaxed.
Sitting in this position, I was slightly taller than he was. I gazed down at him with my
hands neatly clasped in my lap. While I stared at his face, I felt like tracing his jawline. I lifted my hand, but then automatically lowered it. As if reading my thoughts, Hiei grabbed my hand and pressed my palm against his cheek. At the contact, my eyes watered. I blinked
away the wetness and leaned forward to kiss his other cheek. "Eat," I whispered into his ear.
Without releasing me, he leaned forward and reached for his chopsticks. I rested against him comfortably, feeling at peace for the first time this week.
A/N: Thanks to **akasoeki** for beta-ing! Oh and I got the title from the song Change (In The House of Flies) by the Deftones from the Queen of the Damned Soundtrack. The way I
interpreted it fit this chapter. I don't know if anyone will see eye to eye on it with me, but I thought it dealt with trapping innocence, or something fascinating. Anyways, my beta
and I thought this was a good enough chapter to scrape through the rating system, because you know how that goes. Love you and see you next week!
I have a deviant art page. Check it out if you want. Link in profile.