To my guest reviewer: Happy you liked the previous chapter. It was a rather tame one compared to the others, but a necessary one for getting important info out there. I'm also glad so many are actually reading the little author's notes. I like to whet the appetite a bit with those tiny previews of the next chapters.
The clacking sounds of bamboo swords repeatedly striking against each other were what greeted Loren as he walked down the thankfully shoveled path towards Gray's front door this morning. He heard a few grunts and excited yelps now and then, all from a single female voice. One could be forgiven if they'd assume it was a lone woman simply being fully engaged in her workout. But Loren knew from recent visits that the woman making those sounds was not alone, her workout not just for her benefit. He was still surprised at what he knew he was about to see, though upon further consideration, he realized he ought not to be. This wouldn't be the first workout he'd seen Gray take part in that defied even his expectations, regardless of how aware he was about the underestimated skills of the visually impaired.
Seeing as his charge was very likely in the back yard, he decided to forgo the front door, and trudged his way through the foot high snow to the arbor. He let himself inside, catching Lyon's eye and nodding a greeting, before joining him on the deck to watch the impressive display of swordsmanship taking place before them.
Gray was attacking, swinging his shinai with focused precision and speed. Just as when he'd sparred with Natsu, purely attacking against his defense, Gray stayed on offense, perfecting his form against Erza's flawless blocks. Occasionally, Erza would send an attack his way, pleased and impressed by his instinctual reaction to protect his body from the risk of unseen danger.
Gray was getting better at anticipating Erza's random strikes, improving his reaction speed every time he managed to block her. He'd quickly follow up with a retaliatory strike of his own, fully aware that he'd never get through Erza'a defense, knowing it didn't matter. Proficiency comes with experience. The future would always be there. He had only now. For now, perfect the form, and attack.
What Erza and Lyon saw as a remarkable feat of determination to better himself, Loren saw beneath Gray's facade. Yes, he showed confidence and strength in his stance and movements, but there was also a desperation there. A dread. A demand.
This was a coping mechanism.
Before he could suggest a halt to the spar, Gray suddenly stepped away, turning his shinai upside down in his hand so the "point" faced down, holding it aloft before him. Their agreed upon signal, to allow him to call for a stop. Erza immediately stepped back, coming down from her own combat high. Though tame compared to her usual spars, nonetheless, this had been a rigorous workout, one she'd enjoyed immensely. But she understood his need for a break. This had been their longest round today.
"Are you alright?" she asked.
He dropped his arm down, leaning on his shinai, nodding as he tried to slow his breathing. He waited for her to move, knowing she'd lead him to the deck without prompting, the sound of her feet crunching the thick blanket of snow his only guide. She understood what he wanted, and turned in the appropriate direction. No doubt, he'd lost track of his orientation during the spar, but she wouldn't go out of her way to point him towards the house, just trust him to use the appropriate skills needed to move along with her. She smiled as he used his shinai as a substitute mobility tool, probing for obstacles as he would with his regular white cane. His earlier reluctant use of any such tool had long since become resigned acceptance.
They followed the often used path made through the snow, the rest of the back yard surprisingly still covered in white. Loren filed this observation away, remembering how almost every yard he'd seen on the way here showed evidence of recent snow-based activities. From snowmen, snow forts, and snow angels, to tracks and paths made throughout by people excitedly running and sledding up and down the many hills in this neighborhood. Most of the pristine whiteness had been marred by all the various activities, but Gray's yard remained mostly untouched. For a house occupied by a pair of ice mages, Loren found this perplexing.
"Your technique was very solid today," Lyon praised as he exchanged Gray's shinai for his water bottle.
"Thanks. Loren, you're early," Gray gestured before taking a drink.
While Lyon and Erza were slightly amazed and dumbfounded, Loren was amused.
"How did you know I was here?" he asked with a slight chuckle in his voice.
"Aftershave," was all he needed to say.
"Ha! Very good. And how did you know I was early? You're not even wearing your tactile watch," he asked, though he already had an idea what he'd answer. Gray always took his watch off when he sparred. It just wasn't smart to wear something that could snag or break from an errant block or strike. It's possible he was just aware of the passage of time, but blind people often had trouble with their internal clocks if they couldn't perceive light. It was also difficult to keep track of time while concentrating on such an intense physical activity.
He capped his water, placing it under his arm, then replied, "I'm still standing in shadow."
That was a brilliant deduction. He was scheduled for a mid morning appointment. It was barely eight o'clock yet. The majority of the yard was bathed in shadows at this time. Still, the ice mages' abilities to differentiate the temperatures within the light versus the shadows, especially through the chilled winter air, as very impressive.
"He makes a good point, though," said Erza, "Why the early visit?"
"I'd had some cancellations due to the weather, along with rumors of more snow on the way later this evening. I had hoped to be able to meet with you now, so I'd be able to return home before then. That is if you won't be inconvenienced."
"Got nothing better to do."
"Why don't we go inside and get started then," offered Lyon, "Natsu and Lucy are coming over soon with breakfast, if you'd care to join us."
"I've already eaten, thank you. I was actually going to ask Gray to join me for a short walk. Just our usual route. Navigating through fallen snow has its own set of unique challenges that I would like to cover, given this opportunity. He may need a coat, though. It may take longer than we're used to in order to get to the café and back. Perhaps we can bring coffee back for everyone?"
"That's a wonderful idea," Erza said, pulling out some jewels, "You can finally get out of the house for a while, Gray. You know what I like. Don't forget the cinnamon."
Before she could offer the jewels, Loren stalled her with a raised hand.
"There's no need. I offered, so it's my treat. I won't take no for an answer. Now, shall we be off?"
Lyon was quick to fetch Gray's coat off the peg by the back door, placing it in his hand as he said, "They'll be here around nine, but don't be in a rush. Try to enjoy your time out of the house."
Huh. Another declaration of a need to get out and about. He'd never figured Gray to be such a homebody. Yet another thing to file away for a more private conversation. He looked towards Gray, noticing a pensive look that he tried to hide. He looked back towards the other two, watching as they shared a look. Yes. That was definitely a mixture of hope and nervous anticipation he saw. They were using this as an opportunity to get him out of the house today. He was fully aware of what's been going on with his charge the last few weeks, and was not surprised to find that he'd become a recluse lately. Before anyone could back down, Gray sighed, reached for the sunglasses he'd left on the table, and turned towards the arbor.
"Let's not forget your cane," Loren reminded.
Instead of going inside to retrieve it, he snatched the shinai out of Lyon's hand, before leaving in an irritated huff.
Loren once again eyed his friends, seeing them each give their own sighs of relief. Huh. He nodded his farewell and quickly joined Gray down the path.
It was a quiet stroll towards the café, the calm silence interrupted whenever Loren pointed out any new obstacle that the snow would likely cause. Gray had already known of the sound muffling effects that a heavy snowfall possessed, but did gain a new appreciation for the muted environment. The few things he did learn would be helpful, though. Such as preventing his cane from sticking in the snow, and finding new sound references to use as landmarks. Nothing really echoed right now. He'd be cutting a few fingers off his gloves when he got home, as well. He couldn't feel textures with them on. He also needed to get used to planning for more travel time for whenever he decided to leave the house.
Speaking of which, "I take it you've not left your house much recently," Loren said.
Slipping the shinai under his arm, he answered, "I admit to having hoped the snow would have kept us indoors today."
"So it is the snow that's bothering you. You aren't even trying to hide the fact."
"You'd dig it out eventually... besides... I trust you... and it's nice feeling that with someone again."
"You don't trust your friends?" he asked, concerned.
"I do... At least, I try to. I want to, but... Just too much crap keeps happening, and it's hard to... I don't know. It's just... I have no problem with them keeping me company, but I wouldn't have left the house with anyone else but you. Something in me is still mad at my friends, and I can't let that feeling go."
"Well, this is going to be small comfort, but your feelings are normal. Your friends did betray you in a way, even if they meant it for good. An act of betrayal can leave a deep wound, which takes time to heal."
"Yeah. The scars you can't see always do."
"... That they do. But what about the snow? I can only imagine your discomfort with it must be a recent development. Can you tell me why you suddenly dislike it?"
"I have no freakin clue! I grew up in Isvan. My village was settled in a damned tundra! Our winters lasted over half the year... I love snow. But for some reason, I just can't make myself care about it today. The night it started falling, I couldn't give a crap about it, one way or the other. Everyone's been trying to get me to come out and enjoy it all week, and I don't want to disappoint them with my lack of enthusiasm."
"Do you think it could be possible that the source of your apathy may lay in the fact that it was snowing when your parents died?"
Holy crap, did that came out of no where, and Gray was so startled, he'd have fallen if Loren hadn't noticed him about to miss the curb his shinai hadn't caught.
"How... ?"
"You just said your winters lasted half the year. I had a fifty/fifty chance of guessing correctly. When I considered everything else that's been bothering you, my chances of being right increased."
"But why hadn't it bothered me before? I've been an ice mage for years. I thrive in the winter."
"You did... until you lost your powers."
This conversation was steering into the forbidden zone very quickly, but oddly, Gray wasn't as bothered by it as he usually would be.
"If I may, I'd like for you to try to think objectively about this before you answer: If you hadn't been orphaned, would you have ever considered learning magic, becoming a mage, and joining a guild?"
An answer of yes was almost automatic, but he did as he was asked and gave it some thought. Truth be told, he wasn't sure where his path might have led, had his parents lived. Neither of them were mages in life. Hell, the only reason his father had learned Ice Devil Slayer magic, which was rather convenient for Gray, actually, was because END (also rather conveniently his best frenemy) was a fire demon. Which he'd only learned so he could avenge the deaths of his wife and son. Gray was practically the same. The only reason he'd learned magic in the first place was to kill the demon that had taken everything from him. So would he have ever become a mage if his parents hadn't been killed?
"No... I'm not sure I would have..."
"Your sparring match against Erza, I noticed you were particularly focused and determined today. You had more fire and passion in that workout than I'd seen previously. But also a bit of anger? Sadness?"
So he'd been taking advantage of a new form of stress relief. What else could he do? Knit? Do a jigsaw puzzle? Jog? His options were kind of limited here.
First the questions regarding his snow avoidance, then about his parents and his magic, now his choice of decompression techniques. Where was he going with all these random things? Were they so random?
"Bottom line it, please?"
"You're scared."
"No shit."
"Not of what's already happened, but of what may come. Your parents were killed, so you learned magic to avenge them. But the demon that killed them was defeated. Why did you continue to perfect your magic? Was it because of your master, Ur? That's fair, but is that the only reason? Your friends have told me on many occasions that you're very protective of them. And of your guild. Is it because you fear losing them as well? You've lost your magic, along with your sight and voice. You're now affected by the cold just like an ordinary man. The cold, which had been your ally for years, and that you could control, now holds sway over you. You feel powerless right now. So all you want to do now is train, get stronger, develop what skills you still have. To prevent the loss you so fear."
This was heavy. And depressing. It was kind of fueling his anger, as well. But he was right. It made sense. He couldn't fault his assessment. However...
"... You're an asshole. You know that?... So should I stop?"
"That depends. Are you the squirrel or the nut?"
"*Tsk* I thought I was both."
"Precisely. That's true for all of us, though some may lean more to one side than the other. Man is a very dynamic being. We exist in a perpetual duality, always walking the line between right or wrong, good or evil, love or hate. In answer to your question, I see no harm in continuing to improve your skills. Even if you're motivated by fear, a great deal of that fear comes from love as well. If you didn't love your friends, you wouldn't fear losing them. However, I would first ask you to consider this: Fear is the opposite of faith. So in order to combat fear, you must have faith."
"I already believe in God."
"Good. Hold firmly to that. It will certainly help you. But I'm talking about something a little closer to the mundane. For example, when I was child, I was afraid to swim. I didn't want to learn. My father took me into the water one day, and made me learn. He told me that no matter what, he would keep me safe. I may had been afraid of the water, but I'd always trusted my father, and knew he would never let me come to harm. I had faith in him, and that faith was stronger than my fear. So, I learned how to swim.
"For a while now, you've been struggling with fear, justifiably so. The way to combat that fear is through faith. Faith in your friends, faith in yourself, faith in God, whatever you can believe in that is stronger than your fears. So what I want you to do is focus on that. When you train, don't do so because you may lose your friends if you don't. Train because you won't lose them if you do. When you feel fear, trust that you're not alone, that your friends will help you face those fears.
"You have every reason to harbor fears and doubts. No one with any decency could ever hold them against you. But if you recall, you have every reason to have faith as well. You survived a horrendous experience, not just because your friends came and rescued you in time, but because you held out long enough for them to do so. You even ended up saving them in the end. God forbid you find yourself in similar danger again, but you've already seen what you can do, and what your friends are willing to do to save you. Continue to have faith in God, in your friends, and in yourself. You are stronger than your fears."
Loren was awfully talkative today. He certainly didn't hold back. But... Gray appreciated the honesty. Maybe this was why it was so much easier to talk to someone who hadn't known him for years, who wasn't one of his closest friends. Everyone else would have been gentle, sympathetic, bending over backwards to not risk hurting his feelings. Loren wasn't politically correct, nor did he hold back in bringing up subjects that his friends wouldn't dare. He told it so straight faced and with such candor, he couldn't even dredge up the anger that he'd usually feel at all these reminders of his past. He understood what Gray needed to hear, and told him point blank. It was... refreshing.
"You're still an asshole... but thank you."
"Always happy to help. And wouldn't you know it, we're already here."
They'd arrived at a small neighborhood market place close to Gray's house. There were several shops around the plaza, which featured a wide open space that was a popular gathering place for kids to run around while their parents shopped. He could hear the sound of children playing throughout the plaza. His head perked up. Was that...? A smile grew on his face, the first one Loren had seen all morning.
He brought his fingers to his mouth and whistled, fully aware that the noise would be muffled by the snow, but knowing it would reach his target all the same. She'd gotten quite familiar to it's pitch and resonance ever since he'd started using it to gain her attention in the guild.
"Gray-ni!"
Asuka broke away from her parents and friends, struggling through the knee high (to her) snow as quickly as she could, reaching her big brother with such excitement, the kind as expected from seeing a long lost friend. She wasn't too far off. Except for that brief moment in the guild two weeks ago, she hadn't seen him, memories intact, in almost a month. Seeing his rare smile, she smiled back, reassured by his happy mood, and crashed into his knees, hugging with all her might. She was quickly followed by her parents, along with some of her friends, who approached with caution, as they knew who he was, but was too shy to get too close. Who wouldn't be in awe of one of the champions of the Grand Magic Games, and a hero of the Alvarez War?
"Where have you been?! It's been too many days! Are you feeling better? When are you coming back to the guild? Did you come out here to play? It snowed! Come play with us! We're making snowmen!"
Without giving him time to answer, she grabbed his hand, trying to pull him towards her friends, but found her feet slipping along the ice as he held her in place. She turned back to see him silently chuckling at her exuberance, before he reclaimed his hand to answer her.
"Sprite, I want you to meet my friend, Loren. Loren, this is Asuka," he introduced as he spelled their names.
"Loren? Hey, my friend's mom has that name!"
Loren chuckled, and his grin widened when he saw the smirk on Gray's face. "I told you so," it seemed to say. He kneeled down so he was eye to eye with Asuka, and greeted her warmly.
"It's a pleasure to meet you, Asuka-chan. Your big brother has told me much about you. And who are your little friends?"
Finally realizing that Gray was trying to encourage her to show some proper courtesies, she smiled and blushed as she introduced her friends, who all bashfully waved or gave their own quiet greetings. While this was going on, Alzack approached Gray, clearing his throat to get his attention.
"You look well. Asuka's been asking about you a lot. We're glad we could run into you, Bisca and I. After what happened, we were concerned that you'd still be upset."
"Yes," Bisca continued, "I wanted to apologize again for slapping you before. I know you'd never do anything to harm Asuka. I think, for just a moment, I may have scared her more than you did. I'm sorry."
He knew they only understood a small number of gestures, so his options were limited in his response. He just settled for, "It's fine. Shit happens. We're good," before focusing back on the kids when he heard Asuka introducing him to them. Okay. So he may have taught the parents a few words outside of Asuka's vocabulary. Purely for educational purposes, just so they'd know if she ever picked up a few naughty words on her own. They laughed, and were relieved. Though she'd apologized before, this time, he hadn't brushed her off.
"Now can we go play?" asked Asuka.
Before Gray could disappoint her, Loren stepped in, saying, "Actually, we came here on a coffee run, but if Gray would give me a list of what to purchase, I could go in while he played for a bit." Not one word of that was in retaliation for the name jokes. Not one. This was all purely for his benefit. A chance to socialize and use his creative talents. Gray mentally called BS right away.
Gray, who still wasn't really feeling it today, had little choice but to comply as Asuka excitedly started shouting her joy. So he quickly gestured the beverage list, not even caring if Loren got it all, as he wasn't going to repeat it, and resigned himself to Asuka's renewed pulling on his hand, dragging him towards a collection of just-started snowmen in the making.
Her parents were amused, and were about to follow, when Bisca decided that coffee sounded good. She offered to help Loren with the drinks, so Alzack stayed to watch the kids with the other parents while she and Loren waited in the long line into the café. This was certainly a day for warm beverages.
Alzack couldn't believe how some of the moms were trying to gain Gray's attention as he approached, and had to laugh at the crestfallen looks they wore when they finally noticed what he was using the shinai for. These were all happily married women! That didn't stop a few bolder ones from trying to sound flirtatious as they introduced themselves. Alzack saw Gray's growing discomfort and, suddenly reminded of his phobias, quickly interrupted the pack of cougars, running interference. Anything for a guild mate.
Gray visibly relaxed, and with Asuka's help, learned the layout of what was before him. He started visualizing what each child was trying to accomplish and, taking off his coat, started helping with Asuka's snow monster. Gotta love the kid's imagination.
He ignored some of the kids' disappointed observations that he wasn't going to use magic. He knew that Fairy Tail wizards were very popular in their hometown, but hadn't realized he himself was such a fan favorite with the kids. Asuka, knowing fully well that he couldn't use magic, quickly came to his defense, telling them that Fairy Tail wizards didn't need to use such powerful spells for little things like this, and that anything worth having was worth working for.
Alzack heard it all, and was very proud of his little fairy. The kids weren't the only ones he heard, though.
Having accepted their loss, the moms went back to their usual conversations, none of them too shy about adding a few words here and there about little Asuka-chan's "handsome and well-built big brother." Alzack wondered if maybe, having seen Gray use Gesture Speak, they assumed he was deaf as well as blind, and was therefore free to say whatever they thought they could get away with in his presence. He was proven delightfully correct when Asuka yelled out for all the parents to hear, "Mrs. Leslie, my Gray-ni wants me to tell you that little kids have big ears, and to stop saying what you're thinking! Daddy? Are my ears big?"
Alzack couldn't keep his laughter in as he assured, "No, sweetie! Your ears are the perfect size, and they work just fine! Just like your Gray-ni's!" he finished, looking smugly at the cougars, just making sure they got the hint. Judging by the blushes on some of the moms, and the giggling coming from others, they got the message. He couldn't wait to tell his wife about this.
Across town, Natsu, Lucy, and Happy had just picked up breakfast from LaCroix's, Lucy once again lamenting that they couldn't have all met there as a team. If only Gray wasn't such a shut-in lately. They had hoped that his recent breakthrough would have made him more open to socializing again, but they had to take what they could get. At least he welcomed them to stay with him now. Though when one thought about it, wasn't that more of a step back than progress?
In order to give Lyon a break, the team had decided that one of the them would always be available to spend the night with Gray, whether he was awake or not. For the most part, it helped. He still had trouble sleeping, but was managing a few short naps throughout the day to supplement the little sleep he got at night. And he always had company during those waking hours. It was just a shame how much he still needed it.
"If you want him out here so badly, let's just drag him out. He'll get over it. Tell him to take one for the team," said Natsu.
"Not a good idea. Erza and I have been talking, and we've both been getting the impression lately that he's been doing a lot of things just for us, out of a sense of obligation."
"Of course he does. We all have obligations to each other."
"Not that kind of obligation. We think he does things he really doesn't want to do, not because he sees the need for those things, but just to make us happy. He's not doing them for himself, and we think we've just been adding to his burden. He needs to get better for his own sake, not just for ours."
"I know!" cried Happy, "You can challenge him to come to the restaurant!"
"Great idea, Happy! He'd totally step up to a challenge to defend his own ego!"
"You guys," Lucy once more lamented.
Looking ahead as they continued on towards Gray's neighborhood, Lucy caught a brief glance of a familiar face, though she couldn't remember where she'd seen it before. The person turned a corner before she could get a better look, so she just shrugged and continued on her way. He probably just had one of those faces.
A few blocks down the road, she started getting a little suspicious. There weren't many, but for some reason, several faces kept standing out to her. It wasn't that they were all that familiar, but there was something about those faces that seemed wrong to her. Yes, some were indeed familiar, but they all had a certain look in common with each other. They were beyond stoic. They all stared straight ahead, as if on a mission, allowing for no distraction.
Starting to feel creeped out, she turned her eyes towards the park, hoping the sight of laughing, smiling children playing in the snow would make her feel better. Instead, a sense of dread overcame her, when she saw another person, this one with the same strange look on his face, standing amongst the children.
Now that she had a chance to get a really good look at one of these people, she now noticed another strange thing about them all: as far as she could recall, none of them were dressed for cold-weather. The person she watched now wore a simple pair of slacks and a light sweater. No hat, no gloves, no scarf. Looking down, she was surprised once more, to see that the man wore no shoes.
"Natsu, something's wrong."
"What do you mean?"
"That guy over there, in the park, isn't wearing shoes, or anything to keep him warm."
A look of intense concentration came upon Natsu's face as he eyed the strange man up and down. He quickly came to a conclusion.
"You're right," he said, his voice sounding low and determined. Then, changing his tone, he brightened up and said, "The poor guy's probably down on his luck! You got any more jewels? Let's get him some food, and maybe a pair of boots. I think maybe a size twelve. What do you think, Happy?"
"Better get him some thirteens, so he has room to grow," Happy advised.
"What? That guy ain't getting any bigger—"
"That's not what I meant! Look at him. I think he's up to something. And I think he's not alone!" cried Lucy
As she turned back to face the park, her eyes widened at what happened next.
The man in the park took in a great, deep breath, put his hands to his mouth as if he was holding a brass horn, and blew. Fearing the worst, Lucy cringed, bringing her hands over her eyes, only to lower them when she saw, not the fearsome attack she had been expecting, but a huge number of bubbles flowing through the man's hands, rising and drifting in all directions.
All the children in the park stopped what they were doing, and looked up in amazement at the multitude of bubbles floating overhead. They were enthralled by the sudden appearance of what had to be millions upon millions of delicate, iridescent spheres. They ooh'ed and ahh'ed at the sight, as the bubbles flew throughout the park, floating higher and higher, spreading every which way.
Lucy sighed, wondering how she could have let herself get so scared over nothing.
"See? Nothing to worry about. It's just bubbles. Come on, I'm starving, and this cold weather is making my nose all stuffy. Let's get this food to Gray's already!"
"Aye!"
"Yeah, let's go."
As they turned to leave, some of the bubbles started coming down. One of them floated towards Lucy. She smiled, holding up her hand, about to let the bubble alight onto her palm.
Natsu, trying to clear his sinuses, breathed in deeply, feeling the sting of the cold, when his nose twitched, and his eyes widened.
"Lucy, don't—"
*pop*
*BTOOOM!!!*
...
...
Next chapter: A surprise assault against Magnolia. What good is a blind man in a fight?