Chapter 40: Sleeping Titan
Eren feels like he is floating. It´s different from flying with the 3DM gear. You are always attached to something, even when you let yourself fall. There is always one point that holds you. The same in the forest. When he jumps from branch to branch, he has always a goal. Never does he let go of it. Now he is weightless nothing bonds him to the ground. No one is holding him and Eren would call it freedom but he is missing something. He isn't sure what but he feels empty as if he would lose something when he stays like that but he can´t remember. What would he lose staying here in the floating nothingness?
What is there, outside of this place, anyway? He had been alone most of his life, had never needed anyone. His forest is his home, he kills the titans that come to close and he spends his days sunbathing and jumping around the trees. What else would he need.
…
Sometimes he has to make graves, sometime there are forever-sleeping people. People with sharp blades and green cloaks. Small ones that fight against the big ones. Why are they doing that. They are small and weak and get eaten and break.
Why do small ones break so easily? Eren doesn't want to dig out more graves. He has made so many already. Why does no one stop them from coming?
Eren wears one of the cloaks, his wings, the beautiful wings that would carry hi up into the sky. With the birds only to share the endless nothingness. Is he flying now? Does that mean he is free now. Why does it feel so cold?
…
Suddenly Eren opens his eyes. He is alone. Why is he alone? Where is everyone? Have they left him, why would they? Levi would never leave him. He promised, Levi is his family. He took him inside the wall, he came with him as he started military training. Levi is always with him.
Not now. Why not, where is he? Levi promised he would never again be alone. Where is his family? Where are Mikasa and Armin? Where are his friends form the 104th?
Eren feels small. Like a child, alone in the dark nights, wondering what he is and why he is different then everybody else. Is he alone again because he is different? Did Levi decide that he doesn't want him anymore?
…
Eren rolls himself into a small ball, silent tears find their way out but he doesn't care. Normally Eren hates tears. He doesn't like how they make him feel. Laughing feels better, brighter like the sun. Tears are like dark rain clouds taking over the forest and make everything black.
"EREN"
Slowly Eren opens his eyes. Did someone call him? No here is no one, he can´t see a single soul.
"Eren, please wake up. Don't leave me alone."
That´s the same voice. The same voice is calling him.
"Please Eren. I need you. You are all that is left of my family. Don't leave me."
That is Levi´s voice but it sounds sad, like the one night he told him about Isabel and Furlan. About their death. Is he dying?
"Eren."
The voice is getting smaller, not calling out loud anymore, just a whisper. He can´t leave. Eren needs to go back, return to Levi. He needs to go back and leave his empty place. He doesn't need to float or fly. He needs Levi and his friends. His little human is calling him.
Eren opens his mouth and calls out. "LEVI." Something cracks, the sky isn't in one colour anymore, yellow lines criss-cross the whole horizon. He needs this sky to disappear. He needs to go back to Levi. "Levi, help me!" Eren calls out. The sky shatters, pieces of broken glass break and fall from the sky all around him. There is a light. A light that can only be Levi. Like a hand offering him to take it and Eren reaches out to it and hold on tight.
Eren opens his eyes and sees nothing. Everything is dark, but warm and slowly he realizes that his body is pressed against another body that is shaking and holding on to him.
"…Levi?" He wasn't sure but who else would it be and Eren is right. He is pulled back and watery grey eyes look at him.
"You are back." Eren has no time to answer as he is pulled into another hug. Accepting his fact Eren lifts one of his arms and uses what he has left on strength to hug Levi back.
"I´m home again." Eren whispers and feels how Levi´s arm tighten around him.
"Shitty brat, never do that again." Eren smiles.
"Yes, my little human, never again." Levi didn't protest in the name or the word little.