-Chapter 41-

-Shelby pov-

I'm sitting with my fiancés in the living room. The girls are actually sleeping in right now. It's amazing to just sit here and drink coffee. But something is bothering me.

You know that feeling when you use the bathroom and then walk out? Like you know you flushed but something says you didn't. It's the feeling I've forgotten something. But what could I have forgotten?

I get up with my coffee and walk to the kitchen. Huh, we haven't changed the calendar since July. Have we really been doing that good of a job? Why do I doubt...oh no...NO!

"NOOO!" I run into the living room and see my fiancés startled "WE FORGOT SUGARS BIRTHDAY!"

"No we didn't" Judy shakes her head "It's on the thirty first"

"It was in July" Mairbel spits out her water and the others look at me shocked "Yeah! We forgot!"

"Ehh it was nothing" We all jump and I turn to see sugar looking unfazed "We have had a weird year"

I look at the ladies then back to Sugar "Sugar you turned eighteen!" I put a hand on her shoulder "Didn't you wanna do anything? Like anything at all?"

"No" she shrugs and smiles "I think it was a good day that day"

"Nope" Madison walks over and pushes Sugar toward the stairs "Up you go! We are planning a day for you! Wake up the girls! Today you go out to the mall and then come back for a birthday!"

"I'm honestly fine" Sugar stops the pushing and I can see the sincerity in her eyes "I didn't wanna make a big deal out of it"

"Are you absolutely sure?" She nods with a smile "Can we at least do something for you? To help us? Please!"

"Alright" Sugar shakes her head and chuckles "Let me get the others up"

"Thank you" I wait till she's gone to talk again "Mari you are on cake and we will get the moms back here"

"How did we forget?" I look over at a sad looking Madison "We have been doing so good"

"I don't know" I sigh and pull her into me "But we will make it up to her"

Judy gets up holding Cass "We will make it up to her" She gives a genuine smile toward us "Sugar is a simple girl! We get a simple cake, get simple decorations, and gifts she'd like and we are fine! How many months late are we?"

"Almost four" Judys smile drops with her jaw "Yeah"

"Well" Judy hands me Cass "We best get to work dumbass"

"I" I sigh and nod "I deserved that"

"Enough name calling and finger pointing!" Maribel smacks Judy on the head and looks at me "Let's just give her a birthday she'd enjoy"

"Alright" Judy looks at me "I'm sorry"

"It's ok" I hand her Cass and walk to the kitchen "We need to get ready"

We have to make it up to her.

-Time skip-Sugar pov-

"So they forgot and are doing it now?" I look at Pamela and nod "Is that why we've been stuck up here with the girls?"

"Yep" I take the Rachel from Rachel as she holds it out "It's almost been four months now"

"I think it's more that they remembered Santana" I grip the toy in my hand tightly "You aren't fine with it are you?"

"How could I be?" I scoff and put the toy down "My own family forgot my birthday"

"We all didn't" Sam holds up a card they gave me "We all signed it and everything!"

"Yeah" I sigh "But my moms and grandmas didn't remember...makes me remember they aren't really my relatives"

"Think about the park" I look at Sam who smiles "If they didn't care they wouldn't have done that for us! They wouldn't have done that for you!"

My head gets turned toward the girls "They all signed too" I get control of my head and look at Pam "They love you so much! I love you so much sugar"

"I guess you're right" I stand up and walk toward the bathroom "I gotta go bathroom real quick"

-small time skip-Shelby pov-

"Is everything ready?" They nod and I walk into the house "I'll get them!"

"OPEN UP!" I run up the stairs to see Pamela banging in the bathroom door "OPEN IT THE FUCK UP SUGAR!"

"What's going on?" Pamela looks at me and I can see fear in her eyes "Pamela what's going on?"

"She said she had to go to the bathroom" Pam kicks the door "OPEN UP!"

"Move" She steps aside and I step to the opposite wall "I'm coming in by force sugar! It's too late to open and unlock the door!"

I charge and bounce back. I look up to see the door dented down. I get up and ram it again. I feel my body run cold at the sight.

"Oh god" Pamela let's put a strangled sob "Oh god!"

"Pamela go get Judy" I turn and see her frozen "GO GET JUDY!"

She takes off and I walk in to the bathroom. I look at the red water in front of me. I quickly grab the first aid and grab out the bandages. This is our fault.

We caused this to happen. We killed our precious Sugar. We are monsters.

-Pamela pov-

As soon as I get through the back down confetti poppers go off. I look and see everything sugar would've wanted. They went all out. They did try to make up for it.

"Pamela?" Maribel walks up to me confused "Wheres Shelby and sugar?"

"I need Judy" I get confused looks and I point to the house "Judy is needed upstairs...everyone else stay out here..please"

"Alright" Judy gets out of her seat and walks past me "I'm coming in!"

Judys footsteps disappear soon "Pam?" I pull out my phone and start dialing "What's going on?"

"Grandmas take the pregnant moms please" I see worry and confusion flash "Please just do it and then go get the little ones..don't let them and especially Fran see"

"I'll go" Mary walks past me quickly "Get them out the side!"

Everyone starts moving and I put the phone to my ear. I hearing talking and struggle to talk myself. I give the details and get a time. That's when I hear the screams from the house.

She's been found.

-Time skip-Shelby pov-

It's been 2 hours since we found her. 2 hours since I saw Sugar. 2 hours since I've seen anything besides blood. So much blood.

I get pulled into Judy and shiver. Guilt is eating at me. She left a quick letter for us. I had a few different parts in it.

'I'm writing this quickly. The pills or bleeding will do the work. There's too much going on in my head anymore. There's too much going on no matter what.

I miss the days when it was just a little of us. Now there's so many people in the house. I don't know my place anymore. But the past few months I've started thinking it's not here.

Maybe heaven has a open door. I don't wanna keep anyone down anymore. I don't wanna feel useless anymore. I don't wanna feel unloved anymore.

Shelby you've been amazing to me. You and Judy took me in the most. Now you don't spend time with me. You had to set a day to spend time with me.

Sometimes I wonder what would've been different...what if I hadn't been adopted. Maybe this would've ended soon..who knows. You've been like a mother to me Shelby. I guess I should've expected everything to happen as it did.

I don't blame you though. I blame me. I'm always the issue everywhere. I'm starting to feel faint now. Tell the girls I love them.

There's a box under my pillow. Give it to them. It's my last gift. I love you all.'

It was three engagement rings. Jasmine, Pamela, and Fran have been wearing them since it opened. We had to tell everyone after Sam wondered in. She's been talking with Emma.

She doesn't blame me but I do. We adopted her as our own and did this. Have we really gotten to filled? Is there really too many of us?

"Shelby?" I look up to see James looking somber "I've got a update"

"Sure" I lean into Judy more "Give us the news"

"She's becoming stable" James sighs "The cut on her right was deep..she's severed too many nerves for us to repair"

"So I cost my daughter a arm" I stand up and shake my head "GREAT! What else is there? She lose anything else? What else did I cost her? I almost killed her James! What else did she lose?! WHAT ELSE DID I LOSE?!"

"Nothing" I look over and see sugar in a wheelchair with a nurse behind her "I'm stable and the blood transfusion worked"

"Sugar" I run over but stop before I hug her "I..don't deserve to see you or be your mother"

"I should've spo~"

"I should've remembered" I fall to my knees and feel my tears fall "You were almost dead...we are lucky you aren't in a coma! I'm lucky I didn't lose a daughter"

"Just a extra hand" I look up and see sugar with a watery smile "You think a pirate hook would be cool mom? You think they wouldn't bully me in school if I had one?"

I crawl on my knees to her and wipe her eyes "Im so sorry" She puts her hand on mine "We won't forget about you again"

"Be lucky she talked the hospital out of calling child care" I turn toward James who has a watery smile too "I don't wanna see this family apart"

"She needs to stay for observation right?" He nods and I look at her "Why don't you take your girls to your room? I think they wanna talk with you"

"Ok" She doesn't let go of my hand "You all will be here and visit after right?"

"Absolutely" I give her a forehead kiss "We still need to talk about that pirate hook"

She laughs and I stand up. She walks away with her girls and I feel a arm wrap around me. I subconsciously rub my wrist while my mom holds me. This brings back too many memories for both of us.

None of them are good.

-Sugar pov-

It takes a minute but we reach my room "Nice white walls" I smile at Pamelas attempted joke "Are you serious about that hook hand? I don't think that will cause much pleasure for us"

"Maybe" I shrug and wheel to my bed "I'm just glad that nurse is gone"

"Don't do this again" I turn and look at Fran who's head is down "Please...I can't lose you Sugar..I can't lose you"

"We can't get married all together if you're not here" I look at Jasmine who's eyes are pink and puffy "Don't leave us"

"I'm not gonna leave you girls" I hold my arms out and they all come to me "I love you all"

"We love you too" Pamela shows the ring "It's a yes by the way"

"Good news to hear" I look at the other two "Is it yes from the peanut gallery?"

They nod and we share a big hug again. The whole time I was out I only saw one thing. I saw my family together smiling. I heard so much laughter.

I saw me with four beautiful wives. We all had grown up and we had kids. They looked so much like us. I fought to get back for that.

I have a reason to live right now. It's because of these girls and that dream. I can't lose them again. I can't lose the family again.

I have a reason to fight and keep being here. I'm never giving that up. No matter what.