The team all arrived at Logan International Airport, more specifically the International Terminal. The team had gotten a lead on Moreau. The team managed to track John Robert Keller, Moreau's mover, to this airport.
Nate, Sophie, and Kaira walked into the main lobby. "It's taken us four months to get even this close to one of Damien Moreau's guys. Now we have a chance to hit him and get closer to Moreau. Hardison, take us through it." Nate said.
Hardison was at the desk checking passports, looking at his phone. "Flight manifest for Global Transit airlines 485 out of Baghead shows John Douglas Keller in Business class. Now Keller - he moves antiquities for our primary target, Damien Moreau. It shows he has no checked luggage, just probably a carry-on. Y-you know what, guys? I-I don't get this. I-It'd be a lot easier to intercept him out in the terminal." Hardison said.
Kaira saw Eliot, dressed as a pilot, rounding the corner.
"No, if this guy is as strapped as I think he is, he's gonna have a gang of security waiting outside the airport for him, one bodyguard on the plane, you want to get close to him, you do it in here." Eliot said.
"Sounds like a plan, babe." Kaira whispered.
"Parker?" Nate got Parker's attention.
Parker was a luggage transport worker.
"While Eliot distracts the bodyguard, I'll lift Keller's wallet and phone and do a briefcase switch." Parker said. "Hardison intercepted an e-mail." Nate said.
"And decrypted it. These guys use - use a variant of Larry Duberman's algorithm. I-It's not as easy as baking a cake." Hardison explained.
"Moving on, yes. So Keller has something valuable on this flight, probably Iraqi antiquities. Now, if we get him from all sides, one of us can grab the goods, and then I'll put our hooks into him." Nate said.
Kaira saw Keller walking past Eliot and towards Hardison.
"There he is." Nate said.
"I've got him." Eliot said.
Kaira and Eliot saw another guy coming towards Keller.
"That's the bodyguard. I'm going in." Eliot said, starting to follow.
"Parker, he's got a black briefcase, silver hardware." Eliot reported.
"Silver hardware?" Parker questioned.
He looked through the bags and saw she didn't have one.
"All right, I'm on it." Parker left.
Kaira then saw a little girl approaching Eliot and speaking in Arabic, asking for help.
"Nate? Sweetheart?" Eliot said.
"I got him." Kaira said.
Eliot talked to the little girl, saying she was meeting her family. Eliot grabbed her hand and walked her over towards security.
"Keller hasn't changed bags or talked to anyone." Kaira reported.
"So whatever he's smuggling is probably in cargo and probably under a different name." Nate said.
The young girl was being escorted by a female security guard.
"All right. I'm out." Eliot said.
Hardison sent a woman through and Keller was next.
"Sorry for the delay, sir. We, uh - we've had a yellow alert issued." Hardison told Keller.
"Oh, no trouble at all." Keller said, his British accent present.
"Mr. Keller, what are your reasons for visiting Boston?" Hardison asked Keller.
"Business, I'm afraid. Just a quick dinner meeting. Then I'm off home to London." Keller said.
"Okay. Can't see much of Boston in three hours, can you?" Hardison joked with Keller.
"No, more's the pity." Keller said.
"Anything to declare?" Hardison asked.
"No, nothing at all. No time for shopping, really - not even duty-free." Keller said.
Just then an alarm started blaring and security came to the gate. They approached the little girl, who was caught smuggling in something.
"Uh, guys, we have a problem. Uh, they're arresting the wrong smuggler." Nate said.
Hardison was forced to let Keller through. Kaira watched as some guy tried talking to a guard, saying she had refugee status and he needed to talk to her. Then Keller talked to his bodyguard, revealing he had 10 girls total smuggle in stuff on flights, but the girl was an acceptable loss.
"That son of a bitch is using children as mules." Kaira muttered, not happy.
The security took the girl past them.
"Okay, Hardison, Eliot, I want you to tail Keller -Discreetly. No contact. Surveillance only. Parker, if you get an opening, I want you to lift, uh, Keller's cellphone and clone it. Nothing else." Nate ordered.
"Kaira and I need access to that girl." Sophie told Nate.
"No, no, it's too risky." Nate said.
"What? Hardison has TSA badges." Sophie questioned.
"For this gate only, Soph." Kaira said.
"They just played us. No, I'm going in." Sophie said, adamant.
"No, you're not. No, no. No, w-we can't have access to one of those holding areas. It's deep security." Nate explained.
"Then we talk to the family." Kaira suggested.
"Let's get this little girl home." Nate said.
Nate left to go meet them and Kaira had Sophie follow them, though it was obvious that Sophie wanted to grift her way in. They sat down on some chairs in the lobby and got their story from a guy named Ibrahim, the same one trying to get the security guard to let him talk to the girl.
"So, you're an immigration advocate?" Sophie asked the guy.
"I have spent the past six years trying to reunite wartorn families. I meet people off the plane and hope the smugglers and drug dealers haven't gotten to them first." Ibrahim said.
"But she's innocent. Well, there must be something you can do." Sophie said.
"I can file paperwork. That is all I can do. She's sitting alone in a holding cell, and I don't know what to tell her family." Ibrahim said, knowing his hands were tied as much he as wanted to help.
"She could be kept in the system for months without being processed." Nate said.
"The laws haven't caught up to this kind of crime." Kaira pointed out.
"I deal with a lot of children seeking asylum. These tactics are not uncommon. A man with a gun forces a statue or a necklace into a kid's bag and says, "take this onto the plane or I'll kill you." Ibrahim explained.
"And it usually works. The TSA is looking for guns and weapons, not statuary." Nate said.
"But the artifacts more than pay for drugs and weapons. It's-" Ibrahim explained when Sophie cut him off.
"Art for blood." Sophie said.
"Well, we will do our best to exonerate A-yan, all right? Now, you just, uh, keep - keep filing the paperwork, cross your T's, dot your I's, and we'll be in touch." Nate said.
Kaira smiled as the guy thanked them and left.
The team met back up that night at the bar once their tasks were done. Hardison put the information in his briefing and the team sat at the table Eliot was standing beside Kaira, who was sitting, Sophie sitting beside her, then Nate, Parker, and Hardison stood at the end.
"If I just take Keller out, is there another way to Moreau?" Eliot asked.
"Not a fast one. Moreau got his start smuggling antiquities from war zones." Hardison said.
"Statute of limitations is way past on those crimes." Eliot said.
"No, no, that doesn't matter. The more experienced a criminal becomes, the more sophisticated he gets at covering his tracks. You go back to his first crimes, and that's where you see the rough edges. It's sort of like-" Nate explained.
"Archaeology. Archaeology of crime. The further back you go in a criminal's career, the more primitive his methods, the more mistakes you can find as a way in - a lot more mistakes." Sophie pointed out.
"Since Moreau started with antiquities, these companies and these bank accounts are the closest ties to his real life. And since he's moved up, Keller started running that part of the business. And it's a cash cow. The valuables from the looted Iraqi museum or an archaeological dig - they fetch millions on the black market in the west." Hardison explained.
"Yeah, but unlike a stolen Monet or the Rosalind Diamond, these pieces aren't registered or insured, so they're impossible to track. Man, I should've got into that years ago." Parker said.
Sophie chuckled.
"I mean before we went straight, of course." Parker said.
"So, Keller steals a statue from a dig in Iraq, and he mules it through customs using a little kid and he sells it to rich Americans for 5 million bucks." Eliot realized.
"That 5 million funds terrorist training camps, weapons sales." Nate explained.
"The one thing that's got me stumped is that little girl's arrest didn't break Keller's stride at all. I mean, he's already off on a flight to London. Apparently, he's a-a regular at Claridge's Auction House." Hardison explained.
"Because you don't just sell on the black market. The real payoff, the big money, is when you move it through legitimate auction houses. You fake up the papers, you scrub off the blood and dirt, and you clean it up so that all the pretty people can show it off in their bloody houses." Sophie seemed upset as she tossed her pencil down and left.
Nate eventually followed her down to the bar, where Sophie was sitting, drinking. She heard the door shut.
"Oh, I'm sorry. Are you the only one that's allowed to brood down here, or is it an open bar?" Sophie said as Nate grabbed a glass for himself and went behind the bar.
"I know what you're thinking, but it's not the same thing." Nate tried to comfort Sophie.
"Oh, no. Of course it's not. I stole from one rich man to sell to another rich man." Sophie said.
"No one got hurt." Nate said.
"That I know of. How do I know that innocent children weren't used to shift my merchandise?" Sophie questioned.
"You want to talk about collateral damage, we'd be here all day." Nate pointed out.
Sophie chuckled.
"Yeah." Sophie said.
"Tread lightly? I mean, who treads lightly?" Nate asked out loud.
"Well, certainly not us." Sophie said.
"Listen, Sophie, this guy Keller is one of Moreau's top lieutenants. Now, if we get emotionally overinvested in this or any case, we get sloppy. We get sloppy, we lose Keller, we lose Moreau, we lose the whole operation." Nate pointed out.
"And the Italian sends you back to prison or worse. And with all that at stake, you're prepared to give me a lecture on being overinvested? Listen, I know I grifted from filthy-rich wankers who hardly ever missed the money, and half the time they love the thrill of being taken for a ride. But this - this whole Moreau business has got me thinking. Keller steals from the rich too. And a little girl ends up in detainment for it." Sophie said, trying to calm herself down.
Nate took a deep breath.
"Do you want to go to London?" Nate asked Sophie.
Sophie smiled at Nate.
"Let's go steal an auction." Sophie said.
Nate and Sophie clunked glasses and finished drinking.
It took some time, but they managed to get a flight to London. It was about mid-day when they made it to the auction house. Nate and Sophie walked around as Parker was ready in her cover, Eliot and Kaira were ready, and Hardison was ready.
"I love Claridge's Auction House." Sophie inhaled, looking at the ornate auction room.
"Even the air feels more expensive." Sophie said.
"So this is where Keller moves most of his goods. And his calendar says that he should be arriving here just about now. Hardison, you in there computers next?" Nate said.
Hardison just sat down at the desk.
"Accessing. Okay, a-apparently their computer system is also an antique. Possibly steam-powered, which would be cool." Hardison said, obviously not happy with how slow the computer was running.
"Hardison, this is an extremely old house. They believe in tradition. The computer records are gonna be bare bones. The real contracts are gonna be paper files." Sophie said.
Hardison looked around the office at the filing cabinets. "So that's not just for decoration?" Hardison questioned.
"Just count to K, Hardison. I need a record of everything he's sold here." Nate said.
"Or we could just ask the man himself." Sophie said, seeing Keller walking in.
"Parker, you're up." Nate cued.
Parker walked up to Keller.
"Your coat, sir?" Parker put on a British accent as Keller took off his coat and handed it to Parker.
Parker tossed the coat to another worker and looked through the wallet. Nate and Sophie watched as Keller sat down.
"What do you got, Parker?" Nate asked.
"Nothing unusual. But he does have an auction card from Claridge's." Parker said.
"Does it have an item number on it?" Nate asked.
"857204." Parker said.
"If the number starts with an 8, then it's a bid card. He's not selling today. He's buying something. Why?" Sophie questioned.
Nate started walking.
"I'm not sure why. But if this is his hub, I'm gonna give him one more item to move through it. Parker, return the wallet. Keep the bid card. Find the vault. It should be filled with antiquities waiting to be processed. I need something to establish my credentials with Keller. Eliot, Kiddo, did they bring backup?" Nate said.
Kaira and Eliot were in the parking garage, acting like mechanics fixing a broken car. Kaira leaned against the car, and Eliot was crouched down wiping his hands.
"Keller showed up with just his bodyguard. Driver's waiting. They won't be long." Eliot reported.
"Okay, keep an eye on the front door." Nate ordered.
"Rodger that, Nathan." Kaira said before getting back into cover.
Parker made it down to the vault and made it to the door.
"1905-style Strong Room. Walls two feet thick. Cast-iron. Way ahead of its time. But probably taken out with an acetylene burner during the Postwar crime waves." Parker started turning the dial.
"Retrofitted hinges and alarms in the 1980s - the Thatcher security boom. But English damp... won't allow for heat sensors to work. I almost feel bad for you." Parker said, ending her rant.
She spun the wheel having gotten the combination.
"I looked up the number on the bid card. And get this - Keller bought a ring." Sophie reported, meeting Nate in the back of the room.
"Ah. A Mason ring or an engagement ring?" Nate asked.
"A signet ring belonging to George, the Prince Regent. Doesn't make any sense. I mean, considering the priceless antiquities that Keller handles on a daily basis, this little trinket isn't worth very much." Sophie said.
"Well, maybe he's buying it for a client." Nate suggested.
"But there'd be no need to shift something like this on the black market when it's right here in the open. No, he wants this for himself. I just have to figure out why." Sophie said, thinking.
Kaira was also thinking, though she kept silent.
"Parker, what do you got for me?" Nate asked over comms.
Parker made it into the room and was looking at all the items in a crate, specifically a vase.
"Ohh! This place is great! I recognize over half of this stuff." Parker looked at a figurine.
"Oh. Hello. Last time I saw you was at the Louvre. Well, actually, you were in the back seat of my car, but before that you were at the Louvre." Parker said.
"Parker, focus!" Nate brought her in line.
"Okay." Parker started looking at the items in the crate.
"We've got Napoleonic silver... ooh, some great Russian icons, 17th century, and... a statue, gold guy, uh, loincloth, pharaoh beard, and very rectangular feet." Parker said, holding the statue.
"Falcon head, dog head, or human head?" Nate asked.
"Bird head. And I think he's smirking at me." Parker said. Kaira got a tad excited.
"Statue of Ra." Kaira blurted out, though quietly.
"Sorry." Kaira whispered though she could hear Nate chuckling.
"Okay, perfect. Bring it to me." Nate said.
"You mean something. You're not worth anything, so you mean something." Sophie said to herself.
"Hardison, did you find those files yet?" Sophie asked.
Hardison had just pulled out a file. "Yes - now, look, when we get a moment, y'all are gonna have to explain this English filing system. Now, as far as Keller goes, there's a big file and a small file. Big file is all sales - antiquities, mostly from Iraq and Afghanistan, all with fake provenance." Hardison said, looking through the file before putting it down.
"What's in the small file?" Sophie asked.
"Small one is land purchases - old manor houses up for auction, all within the last two years, all in Scotland. Ha! Places like, uh... Lock Glengorra... And Loch McGr-r-r... I'm not even gonna try to pronounce it, man. It's just a bunch of random G's and N's." Hardison said.
"Scotland? Thanks, Hardison. You can get out of there." Sophie said as she walked.
"Okay, I'm gonna go in. You want to play a little Nick and Nora?" Nate suggested.
"Umh-Unnh. No. I'm gonna stay on the outside for a bit." Sophie said as Parker gave Nate the statue.
"There's something about this Keller guy that's vexing me." Sophie said, continuing to follow Nate.
"Hey, listen, Sophie, you never intentionally put an innocent person in danger." Nate said as he walked out.
Sophie had sat down with the other people waiting for the auction.
"Just don't let him put you in danger. Good hunting." Sophie said.
Nate ended up waiting for Keller outside the restroom sitting on some benches. When Keller left, he was talking about a Spanish deal and for his bodyguard to call his guy in San Lorenzo.
"Ah, Mr. Keller. Yes, I believe you dropped this." Nate said, handing Keller the bid card.
"Thank you, Mister, uh..." Keller said, not getting Nate's name.
"Jensen - Tom Jensen." Nate introduced himself, his American accent clear.
"Oh, an American. Are you with Claridge's?" Keller asked.
"In a way. I've - I have participated in some of their New York auctions, yeah." Nate said.
"Participated how?" Keller asked.
"I'm a broker of merchandise - antiques, mostly - for private collectors. I like to let them know when something, you know, of interest, uh, becomes discovered. Uh, yes." Nate said, looking at the Ra statue.
"Smuggling is a crime, Mr. Tom Jensen." Keller pointed out.
"No, I find the goods. I don't - I don't move them. No, I-I heard that, uh, that was your specialty, actually." Nate said. Keller noticed the statue.
"Interesting." Keller said.
"Oh, yeah. Oh, this? Yeah." Nate picked up the statue.
"Statue of Ra?" Keller questioned.
"Yes, yeah." Nate said, handing the status to Keller.
"You buy that on the Portobello Road?" Keller asked.
Nate chuckled.
"No. I have an archaeologist on payroll. That came from a dig in Egypt. Yeah, we have four crates of really high-end, amazing antiquities, yeah, and - yeah, in fact, I have to find a way to get them back to my, uh, buyer in America, and I heard that you are the right person for that kind of job." Nate said.
Keller smelled the statue.
"How does it smell?" Nate asked.
Sophie stood up, not liking the sound of the situation.
"He smelled it? Oh." Sophie said.
"No, that's not from Egypt. And, uh... see this here?" Keller fliped the statue over and showed the base to his bodyguard.
"No, I'd say this is from the Bellingham collection which is slated for auction in two weeks, which either means you are a con artist or a cop." Keller said, signaling his bodyguard to go after Nate, which he did.
"Oh, I'm just trying to make a deal here." Nate said as he got pushed in the stomach and went down on the bench.
Eliot and Kaira looked at each other and stood up and got ready to leave.
"Nate, we're on our way." Kaira said.
"Eliot, Kaira, stay where you are." Sophie said.
"What?" Eliot asked, stopping Kaira.
"What?" Nate asked as he got punched in the stomach again.
"I said, who are you working for?" Keller asked.
"Eliot, Kaira, you go in now, you'll blow the con." Sophie said, leaving.
"Sophie, the con's already blown." Eliot said.
"Yeah, the old one is. Not my con. The ring, Scottish manors... I know Mr. Keller's heart's desire." Sophie said, continuing to leave.
She walked in to the area Nate was at as he was getting punched in the stomach, then held by his throat.
"I beg your pardon, but your manhandling my employee. Kindly call off your dog, Mr. Keller." Sophie said, a more regal accent in her voice.
"Ennis, that's enough." Keller called of his bodyguard as he looked at Sophie and the bodyguard let Nate go.
"You know my name. I can't say I've had the same pleasure." Keller said, intrigued.
"Charlotte Prentice, 18th Duchess of Hanover." Sophie introduced herself.
Keller's demeanor changed as he grabbed Sophie's hand.
"Your Grace." He said as he kissed Sophie's hand.
Keller let go.
"What happened? He try the Egypt story? This statue comes from a private collection. I meet a great deal of people in my travels who wish to have such collections liquidated, quickly and quietly. The buyer I have lined up for this particular piece is in America, and I have no one I can trust to traverse customs." Sophie sold the pitch.
"If your story checks out - though, on principle, I would never doubt someone of your standing - I will do you the courtesy of not hunting down and killing you man here." Keller said, seemingly showing Sophie some respect.
"Well, thank you." Nate muttered.
"But, uh, I'm not taking on any outside clients right now." Keller said.
"I'll double your commission." Sophie offered.
"I'm afraid the answer's still no, your grace. Now, if you'll pardon me?" Keller said, going to leave.
"Perhaps I can provide you with something else, something worth more than money?" Sophie offered, causing Keller to stop.
"I'm afraid there's really no price." Keller said.
"A knighthood perhaps." Sophie offered.
"A knighthood?" Keller chuckled.
"With all due respect, your Grace, her Majesty hands out 2,600 of those a year. Any pop star can have a knighthood." Keller said, declining.
He went to walk away again.
"I see. Your aims are a little higher. One of the lost Baronies, them?" Sophie suggested.
"Sophie." Nate whispered.
"You see what I'm running here?" Sophie asked Nate.
"I do, but are you sure this is a good idea?" Nate asked. Keller walked back.
"One of the lost Baronies? Not possible." Keller said, not believing Sophie.
"There are about 10 people in the world who can secure an interview with the Earl Marshal, and I happen to be closely related to three of them. If you help me with my little venture, then I'll help you claim a lost Barony... my Lord." Sophie said.
"How?" Keller asked.
"Meet me at Porter's tomorrow. Afternoon tea." Sophie said.
"I look forward to it. And, uh... let's leave our pets at home, shall we?" Keller said, leaving.
"Certainly." Sophie said quietly.
Nate just shook his head.
The rest of the team was mostly confused as they all met Kaira and Eliot outside.
"Who's the Duchess of Hanover?" Eliot asked Sophie.
"And what's a lost Barony?" Hardison asked.
"Can I keep the statue?" Parker asked.
"We have a lot of work to do - about 200 years' worth, actually." Sophie said as they kept walking.
"All right, guys, let's go steal a royal title." Nate said.
They went back to their hotel room. Everyone was at the table, minus Nate, as he was getting a drink.
"The royal cover story is easy to check, hard to fake." Nate pointed out to Sophie.
"I spent seven years establishing this persona. Trust me, Nate. It's rock solid." Sophie said.
"How'd you know he'd go for it?" Eliot asked Sophie.
"Keller's been buying up small but specific pieces of Scottish land. Well, that's one way to obtain a minor Barony. He's also a royal fetishist. I mean, there was no reason for him to overbid on the Prince Regent ring. It had to be emotional. Plus, when I introduced myself, he addressed me as "your Grace" rather than the more common "My lady", and he gave a little bow and kissed my hand." Sophie said, liking that part.
"And what was the Earl Marshal part about?" Parker asked.
"Oh, he controls the succession of titles in the peerage. So this is key - there are 86 unclaimed baronies in Great Britain." Sophie explained.
"It's just a title that no one holds." Nate continued explaining.
"And does it come with a castle?" Parker asked.
"Sometimes." Sophie said.
"Ooh!" Parker got excited.
"So, this is Keller's heart's desire, I take it?" Nate questioned.
"Oh, yeah. Checked into it, man. He's applied for an audience with the Earl Marshal six times in the past two years." Hardison turned his laptop around.
"Denied." Hardison said.
"Good guess." Nate said.
"It's not really a guess when it's that good, is it?" Sophie said, proud of herself.
"The name of this con is called "The Mummy's Tiara"." Nate explained.
"Come on, man. That can't be real." Hardison said.
"Am I gonna have to steal a corpse again?" Parker asked.
"Oh, it's real, all right, and almost impossible to pull off in a country that has an actual monarchy. So, The Mummy's Tiara involves using a forced relic to purchase a royal title." Sophie explained.
"A forged relic. That means we need a forger. I know a couple guys in the states." Hardison said.
"I think I got a contact in London." Kaira added.
"No, Hardison and Kaira. Unh-unh." Sophie got up and grabbed the statue and sat it down in the middle of the table as Sophie sat down.
"Hardison, you're gonna do it." Sophie looked at Hardison.
"I'm a hacker. I hack. I don't forge." Hardison said.
"You're not making a forgery. You're gonna create a work of art. Smell it. That's how he knew that Nate was lying." Sophie said.
She placed the statue in front of Hardison.
"Go on." Sophie said.
Hardison picked it up and smelled it.
"Oh, yeah - it smells like a statue. And gold." Hardison kept smelling it before he caught on.
"And?" Sophie said.
Hardison took another whiff.
"Okay. and - and some cinnamon. There's a little cinnamon on there." Hardison said.
"And cardamom. Those are the spices that statue was packed with as it lay in its tomb for thousands of years. But those spices were only used in Libyan tombs, not Egyptian ones. Eliot, feel the base." Sophie said.
Hardison had passed the statue to Eliot and he smelled it and had Kaira smell it, showing Sophie was right. Eliot felt the bottom of the base.
"It's rough. It's been sanded." Eliot pointed out.
"Markings from the acidic cleanser used in the British museum in the 1800s. And that's how he knew it wasn't a recent find." Sophie said.
Kaira also felt the base of the statue.
"Can I taste it?" Parker asked.
"You should. Go on." Sophie said.
Parker quickly licked the statue.
"Tastes like cold." Parker said.
"Sophie grabbed the statue and placed it in the center.
"Yeah, so, as you know, Parker, most metals heat up when they're held - platinum, for example - but gold, no. Gold stays cool and impassive as a god. So, if we're gonna fool an expert of Keller's caliber, then we're gonna have to overwhelm his senses with something too real to be fake. Hardison, get busy." Sophie tore a piece of paper and handed it to Hardison.
"There's your shopping list. Don't skimp on supplies." Sophie said, handing Hardison the list.
"Use Eliot, Kaira, and Parker. We're gonna go finish the deal with Keller and get him to transport our secret stash of treasures back to the states." Nate said.
"What secret treasure stash?" Kaira asked, realizing that part wasn't mentioned before.
"I'm sorry - does that say goat marrow?" Hardison looked at the list, puzzled.
"Let's go." Nate ordered, starting the job.
The rest of the day consisted of Hardison, Parker, Eliot, and Kaira going shopping for some of the ingredients on the list and Kaira helping Hardison get set up.
The next day, more shopping was done, and Kaira was with Hardison to help him out since she felt bad about all the work he had to do. Parker and Eliot were out shopping and Nate and Sophie left to go to Porter's to meet with Keller. Nate and Sophie walked in, spying Keller at his seat.
"I'm about to revisit the topic of Sophie being overinvested. Now, you want to - you want to run a passion-based game on a man who bankrolls terrorists?" Nate said, not liking the plan.
"Exactly. End of the day, Nate, you always go here, whereas I go here." Sophie pointed to her head, then placed her hand on her chest.
"But to a mark who's always in his head... the heart con's the only one that works." Sophie explained.
"Heart con is dangerous. If it flames out on you, it's like igniting jet fuel." Nate said.
"Yeah? Tell that to the little girl who's sitting in an immigration holding cell." Sophie said, walking to Keller.
"Good luck." Nate muttered as he went the other way to get a seat close to Sophie.
Keller met with Sophie just before she got to the table.
"Your Grace. Allow me." Keller helped Sophie get situated, then sat down himself.
Nate was a few yards away. They ordered tea and got to talking.
"That's quite a claim you made yesterday. Can you back it up?" Keller asked.
"There are 86 lost, or dormant, baronies. The Queen doesn't approve of titles lying fallow. Having said that, it's almost impossible to claim one without the proper documentation." Sophie pointed out.
"I've done some research in that area myself. It's proven less than fruitful." Keller said.
"Birth certificates, church records, even whole family trees are submitted for consideration. But if you were to meet the Earl Marshal with the private journal of a royal ancestor, even the Queen herself couldn't refuse you." Sophie said. Keller was confused.
"A private journal? Belonging to?" Keller questioned.
"The mistress of King George the 3rd." Sophie said.
"That's a myth. Isn't it?" Keller questioned.
Sophie took a sip of her tea.
"As you know, George's reign ended in abject failure - loss of the colonies, an incurable illness, a dim-witted som poised to take the throne. The one thing he succeeded at was protecting his mistress, Catherine. In a moment of clarity in the last throes of his disease, he sent a pregnant Cathernine to America with a trunkful of treasure. And Catherine... kept a diary." Sophie told the story, taking another sip of tea.
"That has never been proved." Keller pointed out, not buying it.
"Of course. Some say she became a commoner in Massachusetts. Some say she died at sea. Some say she never left London at all. No one knows. But a man who has her book could claim a direct descent to Catherine..." Sophie explained.
"And the King of England." Keller realized.
"Now... that's got to be worth a barony and a small fortune." Sophie said, taking a bite of a sandwich.
Meanwhile, back at the hotel, Eliot and Kaira had arrived with a box of stuff for Hardison, who was on his laptop with a bowl, wipes, and a yellow substance in a bottle. Eliot sat the box on the table.
"I got your turpentine. I got your walnut oil, by the way." Eliot said, putting those items on the table.
"And a bucket of... soot." Eliot handed the box to Hardison.
"It's everywhere." Kaira chuckled as she saw the soot on Eliot's hands.
Hardison seemed pleased.
"Way to get your hands dirty." Hardison said. Eliot grabbed a yellow rag.
"Yeah, thank you." Eliot said, wiping his hands.
"Hey, put that down, man. That's my paper." Hardison said.
"It's a rag." Eliot pointed out.
"No, that's what printers used to make paper back in the 1700s." Hardison handed Eliot the wipes.
"Use a moist towelette, please, and thank you." Hardison said.
Eliot grabbed one. Kaira noticed a smell, and so did Eliot, who smelled his hand. Kaira grabbed it and smelled it to.
"What's that smell?" Eliot asked.
"Uh, y-you don't want to know how they wet the paper back in the day." Hardison said.
Kaira immediately knew what he meant and about threw up.
"Oh, hell no." Kaira groaned, grabbing a wipe.
"Did you -" Eliot said, also grabbing a wipe, not happy.
"Do not ask me, man." Hardison warned.
Eliot grabbed a few more wipes and left.
"Damn it, Hardison!" Eliot growled, and Kaira went to follow him, disgusted.
"Why you so sensitive? You touch worse." Hardison pointed out.
"I'm going out for Babaa Ghanoush!" Eliot yelled, leaving.
"And I'll join after I get a shower. Cause I feel really disgusting all of a sudden!" Kaira said, slamming the door behind them.
She did indeed do that.
Back at the tea place, Keller was pouring some milk in his cup.
"Do you have the book?" Keller asked.
"The book's coming up for auction at Claridge's as part of a small lot of 18th-century volumes. Even the auctioneer himself doesn't know its true value. I was just gonna pick it up as a family heirloom, but I'd be happy to share it with you, along with a personal letter of introduction to the Earl Marshal." Sophie said.
Nate was still listening in.
"If I help you move your goods to America. What's in the freight?" Keller accepted the deal.
"Oh. Let's just say bits and bobs - statuary from Egypt, paintings from France. There's a demand for these things in America. But my operation is small and relies on relationships. I just don't have the infrastructure to move so much so quickly." Sophie said.
"Well... I do." Keller said.
"So, it's a deal, then?" Sophie questioned.
"Almost. There's someone who wants to see you... Duchess." Keller said.
An older woman in pink revealed herself behind a wall.
"Oh?" Sophie questioned, trying not to break cover.
Nate didn't like this. "Okay, who is it? Sophie, listen, if it gets too hot, just leave." Nate said.
Keller stood up as the woman approached.
"Her Ladyship, the Countess of Kensington." Keller introduced her.
Sophie stood up and looked tense as the woman walked closer.
"All right, Sophie, listen, if your cover's blown, it's okay. Just find a way out." Nate said.
The woman was now in front of Sophie, who looked surprised to see her.
"Sophie?" Nate said, not liking the quiet.
"Charlotte!" The Countess said, extending her hands out to give a hug.
"Auntie!" Sophie exclaimed nervously, hugging the woman.
The women started chuckling and laughing.
"Charlotte?" Nate whispered to himself.
"There. Well. Family reunion." Keller said.
The women sat down and started talking about their pasts.
Back at the hotel, Hardison was printing out sheets of "paper" and Kaira, Eliot, and Parker arrived back. Parker and Eliot were arguing as they entered.
"I think the technical term is cotton swell." Parker argued.
"Maybe it's you putting them in too far. That's your problem." Eliot argued.
Parker looked at the paper on the clothesline that Hardison had set up.
"Um... I don't know how soon we're doing this auction scam, but are you planning on printing out the entire diary, page by page?" Parker questioned Hardison.
"Better hope she had a short and boring life." Kaira said.
"Do you know what I've achieved here? Do you? I made ink from boysenberries, okay? I-I-I-I've tanned hide for the covers." Hardison said.
"Forgot to tell you - don't go in the jacuzzi. It's not safe." Eliot said to Parker and Kaira.
"There goes my hot tub, wine, and book idea." Kaira whispered.
"I made glue for the binding from animal parts I do not care to discuss. I-I-I've made content for the filler pages using an algorithm from digitized colonial-era novels and diaries. I-I-I-It's Shakespeare in the house, people, Shakespeare." Hardison started ranting.
"Yeah, it sounds like a lot of work." Parker said.
"It is. In a single day, I've gone from apprentice to journeyman to master." Hardison said.
"He's losing it." Eliot said as Parker said, "Okay."
"Well, Yeah, so I'm gonna go steal some stuff." Parker said.
"Okay, but come back, caused I-I've fused computer technology with - with - with this stuff." Hardison pointed to all the stuff on the table.
"All right, man. Let us know how that goes." Eliot said, walking away.
"With - with - mm-hmm. I've hacked history! I've hacked history, people." Hardison said.
Eliot and Parker left.
"I'll stay." Kaira said.
"Really?" Hardison questioned.
"Yeah. Wouldn't want to miss the great Alec Hardison hacking history." Kaira teased lovingly as she got ready to help Hardison.
Back at the tea place, Sophie, the Countess, and Keller were all laughing as Sophie and the Countess were telling stories of "Charlotte's" past.
"So, there I was - remember this?" Sophie started laughing.
"I had the weed clippers in one hand, I had the prize petunias in the other." Sophie said.
"And the dear girl looked at me right in the eye and said..." The Countess said.
"Auntie, at least you still have the blue ribbon!" Sophie and the Countess said at the same time.
They chuckled at the story. Then Keller's phone rang.
"Pardon me a moment." Keller said, getting his phone out and seeing who was calling it.
"It will give us a chance to catch up." The Countess said, excusing Keller.
He left to take the call, and it was Moreau. Sophie exhaled and looked at the Countess.
"So, my dear Charlotte, where have you been all these years?" The Countess asked Sophie.
"Oh, you know, traveling. I always wanted to see the world. How have you been, Auntie?" Sophie said.
"Oh, well enough in spite of my pains, what, with our dear William gone these eight years come April." The Countess said.
Sophie lowered her head in sadness.
"Oh, don't look so sad, girl. It'll pucker your looks." The Countess said, kind of rudely.
"I miss him, that's all." Sophie said.
"Yes, well... he never blamed you for running off like you did. But the drink helped to console him." The Countess said.
"I loved him, Auntie - very much." Sophie said.
"And he loved you. dear - fiercely. One has to love fiercely in order to die of a broken heart. Don't you agree?" The Countess said.
Sophie looked at Nate, and he took a drink and tossed his menu on the table, seemingly not knowing what to make of this. Just then, Keller returned and Sophie stood up.
"I am so sorry, your Grace. That, uh, was my employer. There's been an incident in Boston that's made him more cautious about our next shipment." Keller said.
"Oh. Well, I'd best go take care of some details." Sophie said.
"Instead of next week, We'll be taking it out tomorrow. That's not gonna be a problem, is it?" Keller said.
Sophie wasn't pleased. but they had to deal with it.
They said goodbye and left to fill the team in. Kaira and Hardison worked double-time overnight in order to get ready to get the book in the auction the next day.
The next day, the team got ready. Hardison and Kaira kept working on the diary, Sophie and Nate went to the auction, Eliot was waiting to be told what to do, and Parker got ready. Nate and Sophie were in the auction room.
"Sophie." Nate said.
"You have something you want to ask me." Sophie said.
"I, uh - yeah." Nate sat down. "How real is this, uh - this Duchess persona?" Nate asked quietly.
"Where are we exactly on your side of things?" Sophie asked, going to sit down and ignoring the question.
"Yeah, I mean, uh, you know, Keller is shipping his antiquities out of London in the morning, we have to finish forging a 200-year old book that has to hold up to expert scrutiny, and take over an auction that's gonna start in five minutes and deliver to Keller a treasure trove of antiquities that we don't actually have." Nate pointed out.
"Piece of cake." Sophie got up and turned back to Nate.
"Plus, we're one step closer to Damien Moreau." Sophie said before leaving.
"Okay, Hardison, Kiddo, I need that book... now." Nate said.
Back at the hotel room, Hardison was gluing together pages and Kaira was helping to hold the pages as Hardison glued them together.
"Hey, man, Sophie said flawless. now you're saying fast. You two need to have a conversation and figure it out." Hardison said.
"Uh, fast. Go with fast." Nate said.
"Sure thing Nathan. But the glue that's on this binding takes two weeks to dry naturally. A hairdryer is too hot and powerful, it'll curl the pages and melt the spine. Found a manicure dryer, which will work." Kaira said.
"So you're just gonna have to wait. And as stunning as my work is - stunning, I say - it's still a rush job. It'll pass the first inspection, but it won't hold together for very long." Hardison explained.
Nate groaned and looked at his watch, realizing they were cutting it close.
"Okay, Eliot, what's your status?" Nate asked.
Eliot was outside the auction hall, walking up to where Keller's transport guys were.
"I'm meeting with Keller's transport guys right now." Eliot reported, walking.
"Hey, guys. How are you?" Eliot stopped walking and the group of men standing by the vehicle turned towards Eliot.
"I, uh - I'm under orders to inspect your facility before we can move the - the things." Eliot said.
"I see where you're coming from, and I respect your work." The lead guy said, his English accent apparent.
"Thank you." Eliot said.
"But we've only got two jobs today. One is to accompany you to your lady's storage bin and empty it of its contents. The second is to take it back with us. We won't be needing your accompaniment on that second leg." The lead guy said.
"Okay." Eliot chuckled to brush it off. "I got to - I got to call it in. Uh..." Eliot started dialing his phone and turned and took a couple of steps and put the phone to his ear. "Nate, these guys want me to take them straight to Sophie's secret stash. What the hell am I supposed to do with them?" Eliot reported, obviously not happy.
"Okay, stall. Stall. Um, yeah, uh, London city tour. You're good at that." Nate said, standing up.
"You want me to stall them? They're former British Paratroopers!" Eliot exclaimed.
Nate walked by Sophie sitting in the front.
"How - how do you..." Nate questioned.
"Haircuts, all right? It's very distinctive haircuts." Eliot said.
"As soon as I am done helping Hardison, I'll give you an assist, okay babe?" Kaira said, not liking the situation her husband was in.
"Alright." Eliot said.
He put his phone away and turned back and got ready to stall.
Nate was leaving through the back when Keller arrived. Sophie was sitting.
"Your Grace." Keller said.
Sophie waved him over and he sat next to Sophie.
"I've checked into the book collection." Keller said.
"You checked them?" Sophie questioned Keller, getting nervous.
"Asked around. Personal diaries from the Colonial Era. They have no idea what's in there... what that diary is worth." Keller said, getting excited as Sophie was relieved.
"They just think it's just the rambling fantasies of a lovesick girl." Sophie chuckled.
Nate walked outside.
"Parker!" Nate called and didn't find Parker. "Parker!" Nate whispered.
"What?!" Parker shot up from behind Nate.
Nate turned to look at Parker.
"Hey, is Sophie a princess?" Parker asked.
"Parker, just - did you take care of the auctioneer?" Nate asked the thief.
"Yeah. Sophie told me to find out his deepest wishes and give it to him." Parker explained.
"Yeah, yeah." Nate said.
"But I thought that would take way too long, so..." Parker said.
Turns out she used chloroform to knock him out.
"What?" Parker questioned, getting a look from Nate.
"He's gonna wake up in like three hours." Parker said. She put on glasses.
"Come on." Nate said.
They went back to the auction house. Parker got to selling some items and wasn't doing a good job, which Nate scolded her for and Eliot tried to stall by doing the London city tour.
Hardison arrived with the book and met Nate in the staircase.
"Okay. You're here, finally." Nate said.
Hardison was out of breath.
"Whew! Finally? FInally? You are looking at the Leonardo Da Vinci of forgery, my friend. It's all packed." Hardison said, catching his breath and handing the box to Nate.
"All right. The box has to pass, too." Nate pointed out.
"Yeah." Hardison said, assuring Nate it did.
"Okay, and you can track Keller's money back to Moreau's account, right?" Nate asked.
"Okay, but remember, Keller has got to go big or go home. I can follow the bid back to the shell companies, but it has to be big enough - 250,000 at least." Hardison explained.
"Okay, quarter of a million. Let's go." Nate said.
Hardison was much slower than Nate getting up the steps. Nate added the box to the stack of Colonial Era diaries.
"We're up, Parker." Nate whispered.
Parker got the bidding on the books. She asked for a starting bid, which Hardison gave, still catching his breath as he sat down. Nate came to the back of the room.
"Okay, Sophie, we've got to get Keller to bid at least 250,000 pounds. Anything over that, and Hardison can trace the money back to the source, and we can find Moreau." Nate said.
He went to sit down as Sophie got Keller to bid 200,000 pounds. Nate also buttered up a guy he sat behind, getting him to raise the bid so Keller would raise. He bet 260,000 pounds, but the guy Nate was buttering up raised it to 280,000 pounds. Sophie flirted with Keller and had him raise it up to 300,000 pounds. Parker ended the auction for the books, and Keller had it.
Meanwhile, at the storage house, Kaira got a taxi and got close to the locker as Eliot arrived with the goons. Eliot was joking with them as he pretended he couldn't find the keys.
Keller accepted the book as real, and Hardison may have yelled in relief. Keller transferred the money and Hardison started tracing it. The guy handed Keller the box and he walked away with Sophie in tow.
"This is the first day of your new life as a Baron. Shall we go and see the Earl Marshal?" Sophie suggested.
"Oh, I'll be seeing him, thanks, as soon as I bloody well please." Keller said, causing Sophie to stop walking.
"Uh, you'll need my letter of introduction." Sophie said.
Keller turned to face Sophie.
"I had a chat with the Countess yesterday. She told me all about your little royal scandal. Apparently, having you with me would ruin my chances of advancement. I'll take the book, thanks, that's all I need." Keller said.
"What about our deal?" Sophie questioned, not happy this happened.
"Oh, right." Keller said.
He dialed his phone and the lead goon answered.
"Hello?" The lead guy said.
"Ennis. Are you still at the storage unit?" Keller asked.
Kaira was luckily behind the group, knowing this was going to get worse. Eliot saw her but kept silent.
"Mm-Hmm." Ennis, as the lead goons name was, confirmed.
"Clear it out. And their man - shoot him. Throw him in the Thames." Keller ordered, hanging up.
Sophie did not like this as Keller left.
Eliot pulled out the key, but Ennis pulled out a gun and aimed it at Eliot. Kaira was sneaking up, quietly taking her belt off.
"Oh." Eliot said, seeing the gun.
"It really hurts me to have to do this to you. I've quite enjoyed your company this afternoon." Ennis said. "Listen-" Eliot tried to explain.
"But I'm gonna need you to open up the storage unit now." Ennis ordered.
"Listen, let me explain something to you. This thing - there's nothing in here, okay? My boss is - is running a con on your boss, man. I don't need this. I didn't sign up for this, okay? This - this thing is empty. Ain't that right, sweetheart?" " Eliot explained, trying to stall.
"I don't care if it's empty." Ennis said, before realizing Kaira was behind them.
"Oh, hello." Kaira put of a British accent as she pulled the belt of the far back guys neck, choking him out as Eliot took out the other guy, using the belt he pulled off of him, then used the belt to snack it in Ennis's face, then Kaira grabbed the gun, disarmed it, and punched him, knocking him out.
"I've quite enjoyed your company today..." Eliot mocked Ennis. "As well." Eliot muttered as he turned to Kaira, holding her belt in her hand.
"Kaira, if I wanted you to take your belt off, I would've just asked." Eliot smiled as he grabbed the belt and started threading it through her jean belt loops.
"I know. It's more fun if I take it off." Kaira teased as Eliot sinched the belt to the right amount.
Kaira finished putting the belt on and tied the goons up with their belts and left with Eliot.
The team got word that Keller had been detained for smuggling Russian Icons. See, Parker grabbed them when she was in the vault, and Hardison and Kaira used the icons as part of the box. And they also discovered the book was a forgery. And the storage unit was indeed not empty.
Once the heat died down, they went back to the airport and the little girl that was detained was now free and walking with Ibrahim towards Nate, Sophie, and Kaira. Eliot, Parker, and Hardison were a bit to the side, separated.
"I don't know how you did it, but thank you. Thank you very much." Ibrahim said as the trio stood up.
"You've touched so many lives without even knowing it." Ibrahim continued, grateful.
"Well, it's what we do." Nate said.
The little girl saw Eliot and her face lit up. Kaira chuckled as Eliot got down and spoke to her in Arabic.
She thanked Eliot, he high five her. Ibrahim joined her.
"Thank you so much." He said, shaking Eliot's hand.
He left with the girl in tow.
"The storage locker was not empty." Nate pointed out.
"No." Sophie said as they started walking to the group.
"In fact, it was filled with stolen artworks, antiquities." Nate said.
"Yeah, I read it in the newspaper." Kaira added.
"Your own personal stash?" Nate asked.
"That storage locker was filled with some of the very first things I ever stole." Sophie revealed.
"You got a lot of buried secrets in London, don't you?" Nate questioned as Hardison, Eliot, and Parker joined them.
"Archaeology of crime." Sophie said.
"Well, at least I know your real name." Nate pointed out.
"Unh-unh, no. That's not my real name. Charlotte was my stage name." Sophie said as the team stood in a circle.
"Hmm. Any news on Keller's auction payment?" Nate asked Hardison.
"Oh, yeah. In my trace, I peeled back 10 layers of security off an airborne wi-fi connection - airborne." Hardison revealed.
"You might be the greatest of all time, man." Eliot mocked slightly.
"Did you find anything, Hardison?" Kaira asked.
"Yeah, I found 10 shell companies, one of which is actually a promising lead. It's called Slap Shot Investments run by Mark Vector." Hardison said.
Kaira recognized the name, and Eliot did too.
"Mark Vector, the hockey player? The Enforcer?" Eliot questioned.
"Great. Let's get him." Parker said.
"That's the problem. He struck a deal with the Feds. He's protected." Hardison revealed.
Nate got a smile on his face.
"What are you - what - what's the smile? What are you smiling at? What - what is that?" Hardison questioned.
"Nathan, no. I know that look." Kaira warned, knowing what it meant.
"Oh. Oh, no. No, no, no." Sophie said, also not liking that look.
"Oh, yeah. Let's go steal a Federal Witness." Nate said, leaving.
This was going to get interesting.