Trigger warning: homophobia and self-harm.
Neville's POV:
Blaise and Neville sat at a table with his grandmother.
"I wanted to tell you but I was afraid you'd be mad or hate me or... ask me about my sexuality." Neville says.
"Why would asking you about your sexuality to be a problem?" His grandmother asks.
"Well... I don't exactly know what it is... I mean, I've only ever had feelings for him." Neville says.
"You've always been a late bloomer, Neville. You never know... Maybe this is just a phase."
"But it's not! I like him, I really do!" Neville says.
His grandmother sighs, "How long has this been going on?"
"Since after the war. We had been talking before this. I began to have feelings for him before that... But then we had the same patronus and-"
"Really? Are you sure you didn't see it wrong?" His grandmother asks with an eyebrow raised.
"Yes, grandmum. I know what I saw. He saw it too!" Neville gestures to Blaise. "We really like each other... He... He loves me!"
"I honestly just think you two went through some traumatic events and now because you endured it together you both think you have feelings for each other."
"No, grandmum. Really! He's had feelings for me for a long time and-"
"But you haven't?" His grandmother asks.
"No, but-"
"Let's get you home." His grandmother says, grabbing his arm and pulling him away from Blaise.
She apparates him home and puts a finger in his face. She only does that to scold him.
"You never are to see that wretched boy again! He is poisoning your mind!" His grandmother shouts.
"No! You don't understand! He taught me how to fly! He makes me happy!" He shouts.
"Don't raise your voice at me! My word is final! I am so dissappointed. You know what I've told you about this! You're letting this aftermath of the war turn you to bad things. What's next, alcohol?!" As his grandmother lectures his, he feels tears well up in his eyes. "Just go to your room." She says, waving him away.
He walks off without another word. He locks himself in his bedroom and lets the tears flow out. He cries and cries with his blanket over his head. He holds it tight to himself, worrying if this will be one of the only things he'll have left of Blaise.
He quickly grabs a quill and parchment. He dips his quill in ink and begins to write shakily.
"To Blaise, I worry that this will be the last time we talk. My grandmother says I can't see you anymore. It hurts so much. You've treated me so well and I care about you so much, but this could be goodbye. I'm sorry. I want to fix it but I can't. I don't want to let you go but I have no choice. Please, if I don't ever see or talk to you again, please move on. For me. I am begging you. Don't be alone forever because of me. I thank you for everything you've done and I'll miss you incredibly. I'm so so sorry. Goodbye - Neville."
His hand shakes as he gives it to his owl and it flies away. He lays back down on his bed and cries more. He didn't understand why it hurt so much. Why did it feel like he was going to die?
He wishes he had some chocolate, or perhaps a treacle tart, to make him forget it all. But he didn't want to leave his room and come face to face with his grandmother. Not now, not ever again.
Draco's POV:
He sat in the second floor bathroom once more. He stared at the dark mark on his arm that now had bright red cuts all over it.
He wanted it to fade, or even dissappear entirely, but it never did. Even if slicing up his arm didn't take it away, it sure made me feel better.
It seemed to take it all away. The stress, the panic attacks, the sadness. He always hated pain being given to him, physically or mentally, but when he does it to himself... it's different. It almost feels... relaxing? No, not relaxing. Perhaps... relieving? Yeah, that was the word.
Today was no exception. He found a new way to do it this time and he planned to try it. He grabbed his wand, pointing it to his dark mark and said, "Parvus ignis."
A small flame hit his arm and he screamed. He jerks it away and examines the injury. He takes a deep breath and feels his stress go away with every sting. It was bloody painful, but it was amazing.
He lights his wand again with the spell and a small flame appears. He brings it to his arm, but before he can reach it someone shouts.
"Draco, what in the hell?!" He looks over to see Harry. He points his wand at him as the flame goes out.
"Petrificus totalus!" Harry shouts at him. He falls to the ground and his wand drops from his hand with a clang. Harry runs over to him, grabs his arm and gives it a look. "Blimey! What are doing to yourself?!" Harry shouts at him.
Harry pockets Draco's wand and takes out his own. He points it at Draco and says, "Finite Incantatem."
Draco stand to his feet and gives Harry a scowl. "Are you serious?! Do you ever keep your nose out of anything?!"
"What have you been doing to yourself?!" Harry shouts.
"You really think it's any of your business?! News flash, Potter, you don't need to know everything. Not everyone is your friend who will tell you their life story."
"Can't you see I'm worried about you?!" Harry asks.
"Aww, I'm so touched." Draco says sarcastically.
Harry huffs, "I take one look at your arm, Draco, one look! All I can see is burns and cuts and bruises. It can't be from your father! They healed you and he's gone. So what have you been doing to yourself?!"
"Get out of my business." Draco says, walking away from him. Harry grabs onto his shirt and pulls him back. "Let go! I'm not a child!" Draco shouts.
Harry pulls Draco around to face him. Their chests are nearly touching. "Draco... Please talk to me. That's all I ask."
Draco's tough demeanor nearly washes away, but he holds onto it like it was the only thing keeping him from falling to his death. "No. You're always in my way, always in my business. Get out of it and get out of my life!" Draco shouts.
Before he can walk away, Harry grabs onto his hand and holds onto it tight.
"I'm not leaving until you talk to me." Harry says. "Why are you doing this? You're hurting yourself! I thought you didn't want to be harmed anymore..."
Draco finally decides to talk to him, but doesn't once look at Harry.
"It makes everything go away... All the scary thoughts, all the stress and sadness. I guess it's just a way of distracting myself from any emotional pain, you know. I know it's probably counterintuitive... But it kind of feels nice. It's easier to harm myself but it's harder for others to harm me. Maybe this all sounds stupid... But it makes sense to me." Draco says.
"How long have you been doing this?" Harry asks him.
"I don't know... Not long ago. But I did once hit myself to stop myself from crying after father hit me... I didn't do it again though until this week. It's been making everything shockingly easier." Draco says. "Now will you let go of my bloody hand?"
"Right..." Harry lets go, "Sorry... We have to get you to Madame Pomfrey, she can-"
Draco turns around and gives him a 'are-you-serious?!' look. "No! Absolutely not! I'll just be sent to Saint Mungo's and treated like a crazy person. If you take me there or try to I will hex you into oblivion." Draco threatens.
"Fine... But can I at least help you out with this?" Harry asks him.
Draco gives him a scowl, "You don't understand it. How can you help?"
"I'll do anything. I just wanna be here to support you. Anything you need, I want to get it to you." Harry says.
"Then leave me alone."
"Really?!"
"Yes, really. Go away." Draco demands. "But first give me back my wand."
"No. You're misusing it. I don't think I will." Harry says.
"It's my wand, give it back!" Draco demands.
"Nope." Harry says. Draco runs after him and Harry runs away. They run all around the bathroom and he notices Harry try to escape from the exit.
He gains enough adrenaline to catch up to him and tackle him to the floor. Draco is laying on his back and gets up on his knees. He pins Harry's hands to the ground.
"I want my wand." Draco demands, "I'm not reaching down to get it, so you better get it for me."
"I uh... I'm ki-kinda pinned down right now..." Harry says awkwardly. "So it's either let me go or get it yourself." He grunts. "Also I am physically uncomfortable and getting cramps. Please let me up."
Draco sits up and releases Harry. They both sit beside each other and Harry takes Draco's wand from his pocket.
"Before I give this back to you... I want us to have an actual conversation about this." Harry says, "No fighting, no screaming. Just talking."
"About what exactly?" Draco asks.
"What thoughts make you do this?" Harry asks him.
"Various things... Mostly the war and moments with my father." Draco replies.
"Uh... Anything else?" Harry mutters.
"Not that I know of..." Draco sighs and debates telling him the truth. I mean, what has he got to lose? It's not like it matters if Harry hates him or thinks he's weird. "Well... Maybe I'm just... I dunno, lonely?"
"How come?"
"I mean... Even though I've seperated myself from everyone... I don't really think they'd care anyways. I mean, let's face it, no one cared about me until they heard about the situation with my father."
"That's not true." Harry says. "Blaise cared for you and still cares for you!"
"He has a boyfriend to pay attention to and I'd probably just be a burden. I'd definitely be a third wheel with them as well." says Draco.
"I've been a third wheel with Ron and Hermione for seven years." Harry chuckles, "It's not fun, but even if they are preoccupied with each other, they still care for me and love me."
"I dunno... Even if Blaise did care, he's the only one that would. But I can't just parade around him all the time for emotional support. That would be invasive." Draco says, "But I don't know who else to talk to about it all and how to make the thoughts stop. So I just hide away."
"You... could talk to me? You know... I've been having thoughts about the war too. I can't seem to sleep sometimes. Maybe we can talk about that together? You won't have to be alone."
Draco scoffs, "You're only doing that for pity."
"I'm doing it to help you. I... I care about you. It may sound stupid and absolutely not true, but I'm not lying! I care about you a lot. Even if I thought you were a prat all year I kept thinking about that boggart incident... And uh..." Harry pauses for a while, "It just bothered me and made me worry about you. And that look you had at your house... I didn't wanna believe it but all I could see was fear. I really wish I could've helped you earlier. It's terrible to be forced into things and have a whole life planned out for you that you don't want. You know, we have a lot more in common than you'd like to admit."
Draco looks at him, his tough act completely dissolved. "I suppose you're right." He sighs once more and says, "What about your family, Potter? What are they like?"
"Well... I live with my Aunt, my Uncle, and my cousin. They're all dreadful. My Aunt called me and my mother a freak for having magic and they would lock me in a cupboard under the stairs without food for weeks..."
"They're muggles, right?" Draco asks and Harry nods. Draco scoffs and turns up his nose, "Muggles are disgusting creatures. Especially those repulsive relatives of yours."
Harry chuckles, "You speak the truth, Malfoy. Although... Hermione's parents are pretty nice and my cousin actually apologized to me before the war. But my Aunt and Uncle... yeah they're repulsive."
Draco chuckles as well. "Seriously though, that's terrible. I ought to hex them."
"No. I did that to my Aunt Marge... Blew her up into a balloon... Could've gotten into loads of trouble for that. I don't recommend it." Harry says.
Draco laughs so hard his chest hurts, "You blew her up into a balloon?" Harry nods while trying to hold back a smile. "Bravo, Harry Potter!"
Harry frees his smile and leans on the wall behind him. Draco finds himself staring at him and Harry gives him a look of confusion.
He always found Harry's wild hair incredibly charming and his bright green eyes mesmerizing. But it seemed different now. He couldn't put his finger on it. Harry looks down at something, but Draco doesn't stop to think about what he's looking at until he feels a hand grab his own.
Harry was holding his hand... His hand. Not because they were fighting and he was pushing him away but because he reached for his hand... His hand!
He can feel his heartbeat go from normal to crazy within seconds. When Harry enlances their hands and tightens his grip, it seems to go even crazier. He can't speak nor can he move.
Harry's face gets closer to his. "I... I wanna kiss you... Is that weird?" He whispers.
Draco didn't think his heartbeat could get wilder than this. He locks eyes with Harry and looks down at his lips. They look so soft. What would it feel like to kiss them?
"Uh..." Draco responds.
Harry begins to pull away but Draco stops him and delicately connects their lips. Their lips move in perfect sync with each other. He feels like he's in heaven.
They deepen the kiss and Draco reaches up into Harry's hair and runs his fingers though it. It is soft, so incredibly soft.
Harry detaches their lips and kisses his cheek, then his jawline. The hair on Draco's arm stands up as Harry's lips reach his neck. Draco closes his eyes and allows the moment to take over him.
But it only made the sound of someone shouting, "Woah!" Even more jarring. He nearly jumped out of his skin and Harry jumps away from him.
There in the doorway is Ron, staring at them both in shock.
"I'll leave you to it then..." Ron says awkwardly, walking away at once.
Harry and Draco look at each other with wide-eyes. What just happened?
"I uh... I better go now." Harry says quietly, standing up and leaving the lavatory without another word.
Draco sits there in silence, his mind too occupied with what just happened to realize that Harry took his wand with him.
A/N: I didn't randomly make up the words "parvus" and "ignis". They are both latin. Parvus means small or tiny. Ignis means flame. In short: Parvus Ignis is a spell I made up that makes your wand act like a lighter.