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Thanking all the reviewers from the bottom of our hearts
CHAPTER 48
Nunca sera lo mismo otra vez
Daya reached his former house, took out the spare keys from the fixed spot and opens the door.
Is it possible for a house to have its own aroma? Each person have their own odor, but a house…
A house which is deserted from three days has a homey smell. Smell of a freshly cut grass, the woods of a rainy forest . Small of a milk coffee with lots of cream. All giving the message of serenity, harmony, soothe and welcome
Daya moves inside, feels like a house hugging him with all his hands, asking him why had you left me?
Is it possible for the house to have a soul which brightens at someone's arrival. Is it possible for a silent house to give you a deep toning message
Does the science supports this all, may be not but our heart supports it.
Daya looks around the house and then move towards the lounge area
SORRY…He utters to no one in particular, may be to the house
He wiped his eyes softly and sat down for a second then stood up with
Nahi…kaam per lag jata hun…warna me to hun hi sentimental fool
He move to Abhijeet's room and looked around. All the windows are closed. The curtains are drawn
He murmurs: Abhi ne apney room ki saari khirkiyan band kar rakhi hain…pardey lagaye huey hain…per us ko to ye sab pasand hi nahi…wo to humesha khirki khuli rakhta hai…AC chalata hai to khirki band kar k pardey khuley rakhta hai subha uthtey hi khirki kholta hai…
He looks at the bed and found a mess there
Abhi kia raat ko sota bhi nahi tha yahan per
Few empty water bottles scattered on the floor and the laptop on the bed along with its charger. Few books, we can say the reference books for this virus which Dr Salunkhe has referred are scattered on the bed
Bister per itni saari cheezein…to ye sota kahan tha…kia raat raat bhar jaagta…(his tone turned teary) kiun Abhi…me mar gaya tha kia
Koi Na Sune Sisakti Aahon Ko
Koi Na Dharey Tarapti Bahon Ko
He kicks the bed in anger and then sat down on the floor with the laptop on his lap and turned it on
Pata nahi kis naam se case file save kiya ho ga is ne...ye to case ka naam bhi deta hai..is case ka kia naam diya ho ga...virus?
He goes to the search panel and type the word virus, but nothing cames up. Then he type ACP sir's name, few other cases came up but not this one
He made a face with: is naam se bhi nahi hai…ab kia karun? Aik kaam karta hun…sarey folders or drives check karta jata hun
He is going through the folders when suddenly a folder named Final Letter attracts his attention
Ye…ye case to nahi hai kahin?
He opens a folder find one simple word document save there with the heading of RESIGNATION
Kia Abhi sach mein resignation le ke ghoomta tha…matlab ACP sir kehtey they k wo har waqt resignation taiyyar le ke ghoomta hai…ye us ka draft hai kia
He opens the file and started reading it. His expression changes rapidly
First his expression turned to shock then to anger and ultimately the defeated devastated expression came up on his face
Abhi ne pehle hi soch liya tha us ko Resignation dena hai
He felt suffocation inside
Ye...ye to us din ka hai jis din Rohit..mujhey pata tha...k aik begunah ki jaan lena Abhi per effect karey ga...per itna zada...me kiun samjh nahi paya..
I'm Sorry I Failed You
Oh I Burned Every Good Thing That You Ever Gave
tears rolled down from his eyes
kia abhi tab se ander hi ander ghutt raha hai...or mein kehta ja raha hun...Abhi mujh se baat kiun nahi kar raha...baat kiun nahi kar raha...me ne bhi to nahi samjha...Baki team ka to chalo abhi ne un ke sath jese behave kiya unho ne bhi wese hi...per me...
And I Blamed You
I'm Sorry I Failed You
Suddenly he felt an madden anger for himself
Wese to me bahut kehta tha na...dost nahi hun bhai hun tumhara...or pata nahi kya kya...,ye...aise hotey hain bhai..aise hotey hain dost...
I Never Earned Anything, Not A Thing You Ever Gae
And I Never Thanked You
Instead
I Failed You
He closed his eyes for a second to compose himself and then was about to stood up with: mujhey Abhijeet se baat karni ho gi is barey mein
But then again sat with: nahi...pehle case details Rajat ko bhejni hongi warna agar kuch garbar hui to...Abhi per hi pressure aye ga...
And after few more failed attempts finally he got the case file. After reading it thoroughly and necessary editing he send it to Rajat from Abhijeet's official mail id and called Rajat to inform him
He made some necessary changes in it because they were Abhijeet's personal opinion and a bit of emotion is blinking through it. Daya can't let it be taken to DIG's desk and headquarters archive. But he can keep it here in Abhijeet's personal possession so he closed the original document with doing any editing in it.
He then attached the pen drive to the laptop copy the Resignation letter there. He then shut down the laptop, got up and moved out from the house, locked it properly, put the keys in his pocket and move towards the hospital on his bike
...
Here doctor Manjula entered inside Abhijeet's room and found Abhijeet silently playing with the methi paratha in the paper plate
She cleared her throat intentionally and Abhijeet looked up and frowned a bit
She said in fresh tone: hi..Me Dr Manjula...
Abhijeet kept aside the paper plate and nodded
She continued: Actually jo doctor aap ka treatment kar rahey hain...unho ne mujhe aap se baat karney ka kaha
Baat karney k liye (he murmured not looking at her face) kahiye...
Dr Manjula said trying to study his face
Aap ko pata hai...aap 2.5 din se behosh they?
Haan suna...
Per aap ko...goli pait mein lagi thi...wo bhi kisi vital organ per nahi..aise hi muscle k beech mein kahin...per goli nikaal di gai...bilkul clean and clear surgery hui hai...aap ko char panch...ya Zada se zada saat ghanton mein hosh aa jana chahiye tha
Haan...
Per aap ko lagbhag 60 ghantey lagey hosh mein aney mein...
Abhijeet didn't say or react anything so dr Manjula asked
Poochein ge nahi kiun?
He continued looking at the doctor then said
Per aap ye sab kiun keh rahi hain?
She finally declared: me aik psychiatrist hun...
A small smirk grew on Abhijeet's lips
Aap ki zarurat shayad thorey din baad parti...
G...?
Abhi tak pura pagal hua nahi hun...
Dr Manjula said in calm tone
Per...aap ka dil to kar raha hai na ke sab chor chaar agar ja sakta to acha hota..ye sab or nahi saha ja raha hai...me thak chuka hun...kiun me wapis is dunya mein a gaya..kia aik or mouqa nahi mil sakta muje kahin or janey ka...ya zindagi agar Tham jati to kitni achi hoti...
Abhijeet averted his gaze from Dr Manjula who continued in a bold tone
Ya phir ye dil kar raha hai k me bhi ACP sir ki tarha agar sab se mukti paa leta to acha hota...
Abhijeet said in bit stubborn tone Me ACP sir ki tarha nahi hun..
Doctor too asked immediately To aap ko mukti nahi chahiye?
Abhijeet didn't reply to that
Now she come to to the actual point and asked as
Per aap ko ye nahi lag raha hai ke aap k aisa sochney se aap ke dost per kia asar ho ga?
Abhijeet turned his face to her but didn't look at her directly nor his eyes showed any emotion
Dr Manjula corrected herself as: oh...sorry sorry...unho ne kaha tha mujh se wo aap ke dost nahi (she looked in Abhijeet's eyes then said) bhai jese hain.. but jese hain after all...sagey to..
Abhijeet looked up, his eyes although not the old fiery one but containing anger
He said: aap mera ilaaj karne aii hain..Muje pagal sabit karney aii hain..mujh tak hi rakhiye...please..
Dr Manjula smiled a bit then continued: aap ko aisa kiun lagta hai k psychiatrist sirf pagalon ka hi ilaaj kartey hain?...matlab agar aap kabhi cardiologist ke pass jaein to is ka kia matlab hai...aap ka heart already kharab ho chuka hai?
Abhijeet didn't reply
Now dr Manjula turned a bit serious and said
Dekhiye Mr. Abhijeet...me aap ko aik dam clear way mein aik baat samjhati hun...mere 35 years k career mein aap ki case history ki tarha ka history muje bahut kam mila hai ye sach hai...Zada tar log aap se...aap ne jitna kuch dekha hai..jitna kuch jhel ke aap aagey barhey hain...us se bohat kam...us ke aik fraction of incidents se hi un logon k mental balance mein problem ho jata hai..per aap ko nahi hua..aap ne apna wajood khoya or phir se naye sirey se apni zindagi ko shuru kiya...apney rishtey khoye per phir se naye sirey se rishtey banaye or nibhae bhi...Mujhe pata chala hai ke koi bhi aap se unjustified behave karey to aap un sab ko maaf kar dete hain...kiun?
Abhijeet didn't reply
Dr Manjula continued: kiun k aap ko lagta hai..aap utney important nahi hain ..per aap ka self esteem itna low kiun hai? Aap ne to wo saari qabliyat hai...jis se insaan confidence ke sath chal sakta hai...aap ke pass achi job hai.. log respect kartey hain aap ki?apney colleagues ki nazar mein aap aik ideal senior hain...ideal mentor hain..apney senior ke liye aik ideal student they...yahan tak ke aap ke dushman criminals ke liye bhi senior inspector Abhijeet respected hain...jo DCP chitrole team ke sath hamesha garbar kartey rehtey hain...wohi DCP bhi aap ki tareef kartey hain..
She gave a stern look and continued
aap k bachpan ka dost aaj bhi aap ke sath hai...logon ki dosti to kab ki choot jati hai...log to school life friends ka chehra tak theek se yaad nahi rakh paatey...haan shayad aap ke pass kuch purani yaadein nahi hain…per kia sirf is wajah se aap ka self esteem itna low hai…ya aap ko lagta hai ke aap ko jo kuch mila hai wo udhari mein mila hai…or aap ko bas udhaar chukaatey jana hai
Abhijeet tightened his fists, Dr Manjula noticed it well but carried on
ACP sir agar aap per shak karein to aap ko ghussa nahi aata…per agar kisi or per karein to aap unhein samjhaney bethtey hain…koi aap ke memory loss ko le k sawal karey to us ko maafi bhi nahi mangni parti hai…app khud isey maaf kar dete hain…per agar kisi or ki kamzori per koi bhi sawal uthey to aap us ke liye protest kartey hain…aap apna pyar chor saktey hain..apney aik wadey ke liye…per koi or aap ke liye apna pyar chorey to aap khud ko us baat ke liye guilty maantey rehtey hain…kiun?kia baqi sab ko khushiyon per haq hai aap ko nahi hai?
Abhijeet burst out with: haan…nahi hai...kiun ke me aik khooni hun…aap nahi jaanti
Dr Manjula cut him with: haan me jaanti hun..per khooni to aap ab baney hain na…Rohit ke case mein…is se pehle..
Abhijeet controlled his raged breaths and said
Nahi...…khooni sirf wo nahi hota jo trigger dabata hai….agar aap kisi ko suicide ke liye force karein to wo bhi khuni hota hai…agar aap kisi ko is rah per la ke khara kar dein k wo zindagi se thak jaye or har roz apni maut ki dua karey or akhir mein tak kar haar jaye…to bhi aap khooni hain…agar aap kisi ko roz itna mental torture karein ke wo maut ki kagar per pohanch jaye to ye bhi aik khoon hai...agar aap kisi ko itna intezaar karwaein k wo aap se mayoos ho kar door chala jaye to ye bhi aik khoon hi hai..or me khooni hun…or ye mera koi pehla khoon nahi hai
He looked at the other side
Dr Manjula said: aap to kisi se pyar kartey they…suna hai aap bachhon se bhi lagao rakhtey hain…to zaroor aap ne shadi bachon…in sab ko le kar kabhi na kahi to socha hi ho ga
Abhijeet didn't reply but his frowned said that he is not getting the connection between the two.
Dr Manjula continued: aap aik pal ko ye sochiye ke aap ka aik beta hota hai…or bara ho kar wo Army mein jata hai…whan kisi operation ke beech us ki kidnapping ho jati hai…or aap ko ye pata nahi hota ke wo kahan hai…zinda bhi hai ya nahi..aap ki biwi is gham ko bardasht nahi kar pati or us ki maut ho jati hai…phir kuch saal baad aap ka beta wapis aata hai…sab baat pata chalney per aap se kehta hai ke…papa maa mar gai meri wajah se…me us ka qatil hun…aap ko kia lagta hai k aap is baat ko easily admit kar lein ge k haan…sach mein mera beta qatil hai…ya aap us ko kheench k aik lagaein ge or kahein ge k tu apne aap ko guilty kabhi mat samjhna…teri maa bhi ye kabhi nahi samjhey gi…aap ko or aap ki biwi ko us per garv ho ga ya aap log usey katil samjhein ge
Abhijeet looked at Dr Manjula once but then again turned to the other side
Is waqt aap ko shayad ye sochna acha nahi lag raha…per kabhi sochiye ga zarur…
She stood up from sofa and kept an envelope on the table beside the bed and said
Is mein mera jo conclusion hai ya jo jo me ne socha tha…wo sarey points likh diye hain…kiun ke muje lagta hai ke patient ko khud bhi pata hona chahiye ke us ke sath problem kia hai? Hai bhi ya nahi…me apna final diagnosis to Dr Mishra ko bata hi dun gi per aap bhi is ko dekh lije ga..or aik baat batati hun
She move back towards the sofa and sat there then said
Aap agar us din goli nahi chalatey na...phir aap aaj jitna guilty hain us se bohat zada guilty feel kartey...haan ye sahi hai k aik bacha anaat ho gaya...aik maa ne apna bacha kho diya...lekin agar aap us din goli na chalatey to teen scenarios ho saktey they
Abhijeet again frowned a bit still looking to the other side
Dr Manjula got his frown so continued
Aik...Rohit wahan se bhag nikalta or us k zariye virus hazaar logon ko lagta phir un hazaar se or hazzar or hazzar...or ye ke epidemic ban ke reh jata...or jitney din mein antidote aata utney dino mein desh ki na sahi..Mumbai ki one fourth population mar chuki hoti...wese aap ko bata dun k jo antidote aap logon ne raid mein use kiya tha us ke liye indian medical board ap logon ka bohat thankful hai..matlab aap samjh hi rahey hain ke kitna bhayanak virus tha..now dusra scenario...aap ki jagah..Senior Inspector Daya ...wo goli chalatey or...
Nahi...( Instantaneously a voice came up of Abhijeet's throat) nahi...
He shook his head and closed his eyes tightly, his mind racing as
Agar Daya goli chala deta to...Daya... Daya mar jata...wo bohat emotional hai..wo logically nahi soch sakta...wo itney barey bojh ke sath nahi jee pata...Daya ko nahi chalna hai kabhi...aise moqey nahi aney hain us ki zindagi mein...nahi...kabhi nahi
Dr Manjula tried to listen what his lips are moving for but failed. So she continued
Or teesra scenario..pata hai kia hota..shayad Rohit apney ghar pohanch jata...aap log us ghar tak pohanchtey...lekin jab tak aap log jatey tab tak virus sab ko lag chuka hota...or Rohit apney bete ke samney tarp tarp ke mar jata...us ke baad farz kije k kisi bhi tarha vaccine bana k at urgent basis..ap log Rohit ke bete ko bacha lete..per phir us ke bachey ke dil mein bhi wohi ghussa wohi Dard reh jata k mera baap bequsur tha phir aisa kiun hua muje bhi is baat ka badla lena hai..
She paused looking at him, then said in ultimate voice
or aap to jaantey hain k badley ka ye cycle aik optical illusion ki tarha ghoomta hi rehta hai...me ye nahi keh rahi ke aap ne jo kiya wo sahi kiya ya ghalat kiya...per me ye keh rahi hun ke aap ne jo kiya us ke alawa aap ke pass koi option nahi tha...aap dekhiye na...senior inspector Daya ne wahan pe sarey victims ko antidote dene ko kaha..
she shrugs
haan ab bhaley hi research mein ye nikla ke antidote ka koi side effects nahi hain per agar us ka koi side effect hota...ye nikal ke aata ke aaj nahi 5 6 saal baad wo log mar jaein ge…to kia sach mein ye Mr. Daya ki hi ghalti hoti? Kia itney sarey logon ki maut ke zimmedar...itney sarey logon ke khoon ke zimmedar nahi hotey(she focused on Abhijeet's face and stressed on her each word)kia wo aik khooni hotey?
Abhijeet looked at Dr Manjula with wide eyes, irritation & fury clearly visible on his face for a instant but then all the energy sapped out of his body and he slumped on his bed tiredly
Dr Manjula stood up and sighed with: aap sochiye ga in baton ko...me chalti hun...ap ko shayad aaj sham tak discharge mil jaye...per checkup ke liye ana ho ga or...agar Mr. Daya se baat karney ke baad mujhey laga to counseling k liye bhi...apne liye na sahi..apney jis bhai ka soch k itna ghussa aa raha hai aap ko...un ke liye to aap ko ye sab adjust karna hi ho ga..bye..Have a good day
And she moves out.
Abhijeet closed his eyes jadedly, a lone tear slips from his right eye on his cheek, but he didn't even realize it
readers
R and R
Next chap will come up after number of review in this chapter reaching 40 atleast
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: AdityaRajatFan & Krittz