Author's Note - This chapter is rated MA.
Chapter Fifty-One - Unwanted News
The court completed proceedings without calling Loki or Cami in for questioning. After two days of deliberations, the judges announced their decisions in a closed forum to a select few representatives.
No one had asked Loki what he thought might happen, but he could see the unspoken question in their eyes. Friends crowded his rooms, feeling a need to be near and supportive. It both annoyed and endeared him that they cared so much, like a big group hug that slowly suffocated him.
When Frigga arrived with the news, she had Rosner and Nick Fury with her. She looked ill as the crowd gathered and fell quiet. "It is the decision of the court that Jahla will spend five hundred years in the dungeons of Asgard." The queen met Loki's gaze, trembling as she forced out the words. "The double is to be executed in the morning."
Loki deflated. All thought and emotion drained from his being. He dropped into the closest chair when his legs suddenly couldn't hold him.
"Nooo!" Cami screamed, moving to Frigga. "You saw him with Edie. They can't kill him."
"The future is not set," the seer explained. "One small change can have tremendous consequences."
Tony asked, his tone biting, "That's it? It doesn't matter that Loki gets punished too?"
Rosner responded to Stark, attempting to be dignified. "The judges felt they shouldn't be influenced by public opinion or details that did not pertain to the actual crimes. Loki was never on trial. It is an unfortunate consequence that his double's passing will result in his own death."
This caused an even angrier reaction from the group.
"King Odin, Jorn and Thor are meeting with the court right now," Rosner told them. "It is doubtful they will be able to sway the vote."
"It's already late," Bruce argued. "They won't allow Loki any time to put his affairs in order?"
Frigga appeared unable to speak with tears streaming down her cheeks and Cami bawling in her embrace.
Rosner said, "The court demands swift justice."
"It gets worse," Nick called out above all the mutterings. "It is the will of the court that S.H.I.E.L.D. provide the executioner."
"What?!" Clint asked. "Why?"
"Ogalfus convinced them that if we employ assassins, we must not mind executing people."
Loki's chest hurt. Volatile emotion churned inside, urging him to either vomit, break something or run away. He pushed up from the chair, whispering to the tearful Mitzi and Diani in passing, "I need to lie down." He walked into the bedroom and locked the door behind him.
He ignored all of the group's subsequent pleadings at his door. Within the hour, the suite quieted and mostly emptied out. Loki knew them all well enough to understand this was a demonstration of their respect, not abandonment.
He conjured the worst of thoughts in the solitude of his fear, rage and self-loathing, coming to the logical realization that by not taking his own life, he was responsible for all of Bad Loki's crimes and never should have allowed anyone to convince him otherwise. He had been offered friendship and acceptance, allowed to do good works and felt a sense of pride in his contributions. Was it not a fitting punishment to then take all that away, so he could experience an inkling of the loss and betrayal felt by his own victims?
If allowed to live, the Bad Loki would continue to poison him and put others at risk. Loki couldn't allow more people to suffer, especially those dear to him. So, he ground himself in the reality that he was going to die. Then he washed his face, straightened his attire and decided to stop hiding from the world.
He didn't know who awaited him when he exited the bedroom. He was surprised and strangely relieved to see Nick Fury alone in the sitting room, drinking in the corner chair with a nearly empty bottle of whiskey beside him.
"The group in the dining room would really like to see you, but there are a couple decisions to be made first."
"Such as?"
"Queen Farbauti has requested that your body be released to her after the execution. Apparently, the Asgardian tradition of burning the dead is offensive to her people. She wants to put you in her family vault."
Loki knew of the massive chambers beneath the capital where the Frost Giants put their frozen dead on display. It was a strange idea to him, but so was the practice of burying the dead, which some realms favored. He asked, "How did you get the responsibility of asking me this?"
Since Loki had yet to sit, Nick chose to stand. "I'm a neutral third party and don't easily blubber."
Loki took the glass out of Fury's hand and stole a drink, letting the alcohol pool on his tongue before swallowing. "I don't really care what happens to my body."
"Then I suggest you let Farbauti have it. She's promised that anyone who wants to can visit you there."
Loki picked up the bottle to pour a refill. "I thought you weren't going to get sentimental, Nick."
The director flashed him a stern, don't-be-a-smartass look. "What's your answer?"
"Let her freeze me." Loki took another drink. "What else?"
"I'm having a bit of trouble finding someone willing to kill you."
Loki openly laughed, his tone sounding more cheerful than he'd expected. "This is serious," he joked. "I'm surprised Agent Coulson didn't volunteer."
The significance and intensity of Fury's glare tempered Loki's amusement. "Phil Coulson requested that I release him and his team to return to Earth. They departed about an hour ago."
"Oh," Loki said, averting his gaze. He didn't know what to make of that news. "Did you ask Hill?"
"I did. She's not interested."
"I could do it," he offered, surprising himself with the sudden idea and distinct rightness of it. "You'll have to reinstate me to active duty."
The director considered him. "That would solve the problem. Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am. Now may I be excused, Sir?"
"Yeah. You want anything?"
"No," he said, then immediately recanted. "Actually, if I could get something to help keep me awake. I don't want to sleep away my last hours."
Nick promised, "I'll have Dr. Lloyd come by."
"And some type of recording device," Loki added. "I want to leave a message for the baby."
With a nod, Fury departed.
Clint and Natasha glanced up at him as Loki stepped into the dining room. Cami sat in the chair across from them. Her head rested on her arm and the tabletop. Realizing she was asleep, Loki took the seat at the head of the table, which put him between Clint and Cami.
"She cried pretty hard," Natasha whispered. "Wore herself out."
Loki put down the glass and bottle, leaning over to caress the side of Cami's face.
She stirred and sat up, wincing as she rubbed at her brow and temples, which were probably aching from the dehydration excessive crying could cause. She accepted the glass of water Natasha set in front of her.
Clint nursed his own dark amber beverage. He said to Loki, "You seem calm."
There were things he could say, but Loki assumed none of them would be well-received. He gave a noncommittal shrug.
Natasha's eyes softened with visible sympathy. "Frigga showed me Edie's picture. She's adorable."
Loki smiled, pulling the image to the forefront of his memory. He tried not to show that sorrow was creeping in as he thought about all the things he would miss out on.
"I saw Edie with Cami in one of my visions," Clint admitted, shifting his shoulders like they were sore and stiff. "All the signs were there that something had happened to you. I just didn't recognize."
"Don't blame yourself. Not every vision comes true, Clint," Loki said. "I thought Frigga would have explained that."
"I didn't exactly seek her insights." He snatched up the bottle to fill his glass. "Kinda pointless when I planned to give up the power."
"This is no one's fault but my own," Loki said. "I was angry that Odin sent me to serve the Frost Giants. I looked for an excuse, something to revolt over. I invited Jahla into my life."
A knock sounded on the suite door.
"Dr. Lloyd, I assume," Loki told them and went to answer it.
"No more alcohol," the doctor ordered when he gave Loki the pills. "Your system is unbalanced enough right now."
Loki made light of his concern. "Not much is required of me tomorrow. I barely have to be functional."
The doctor handed him the digital voice recorder that Fury had sent, offered his true regrets at the situation and wished Loki all the happiness he could have wherever his spirit ventured after death.
"Where will you end up?" Clint inquired when Lloyd departed and Loki returned to the table. "Is that a question we're allowed to ask?"
"I cannot tell what I do not know. There are exceptions to every rule, and I am my own peculiarity."
"Are you scared?" Cami asked.
His gut reaction was to tell her no, but it would be a lie. Instead of answering, he borrowed her water to help down the pills.
Cami allowed his non response. She told him, "I'm scared."
Loki pushed back his chair to gather her into his lap and embrace. He held her as tight as he dared, pressing tender kisses onto her forehead and cheeks.
"I knew I wouldn't get to keep you," she said, looking mournful.
Cami had been constantly separated from people she cared about, which instilled in her a longing for stability and a deep fear of being alone. It was distressing to Loki that he wouldn't be the one to change all that for her.
"You will have Edie," he said, smiling, though his heart ached. "You will show her how to be kind, helpful and brave. Teach her to dance."
Those last words reminded him of Cami's coveted tango, another broken promise.
Clint inquired, "When Edie asks about you, what do you want us to tell her?"
"The truth—in a way she can understand."
There wasn't much left to say. So, Loki finally addressed the issue he had been avoiding for so long, directing his words to Clint and Natasha. "I'm sorry for everything I put you two through. I know I didn't deserve the second chance or trust you gave me."
Clint downed his drink. Then he stared at the empty glass, his features fighting to maintain a semblance of control. "I wanted to kill you," he admitted, pausing to swallow hard. "I figured you'd step out of line at some point and I'd be justified to do it, but—"
"I wasn't what you expected," Loki offered.
"Not at all."
Cami stared off in a weary daze, her breathing shallow.
"Perhaps you should try to go back to sleep," Loki suggested.
She sat up, taking in a deep breath while wiping and rubbing her eyes. She stole another gulp of her water before rising from his lap. Then she gripped his hand and requested, "Come with me?"
There was particular meaning in the inflection of her voice and the way her eyes settled on him, almost pleading. He guessed that she wanted more than comfort.
Cami tried to pull him toward the doorway, but he didn't budge because they weren't supposed to be alone. Clint must have remembered that too, because he was avoiding their gazes.
"We'll be nearby," Natasha assured Loki and Cami. "If you don't want any interruptions, you should keep the screaming to a minimum."
Cami laughed. "I can't make any promises."
If Loki had felt much bolder, he would have suggested Clint and Natasha join them—even if only to see their reactions to the offer. Though, truly, that was a crass tactic of a presumptuous Loki from a time before his heart was masked with hate and his soul ripped asunder.
"Maybe you should give us a code word, just in case," Clint suggested.
"Oh, I don't know. Maybe 'stop!' or 'help!' or some combination of the two," Cami joked, tugging Loki along by the hand.
Once in the bedroom, the playfulness fell away. Cami admitted, "I really suck at goodbyes."
"I don't particularly like them. So, let's not say it."
This was their last night together and best opportunity to express the trust and devotion they'd forged in only a couple hectic months. Loki planned to give her anything she wanted from this encounter for there would be no other chance to surrender to their yearnings.
Loki cast off his coat and shirt before leaning in to kiss her. The scent and taste of the alcohol he'd consumed mixed with the heat and moisture of her mouth to tweak his senses and spark his sexual appetite. He lifted Cami to sit on the wide footboard of the bed, crouching down to remove her shoes and socks.
When he stood, she reached for his waistband, pulling him close then going after his zipper. He hoped to not rush things, but she yanked down his pants, and with her firm grip on his cock, the concept of a slow seduction flitted away.
Cami kissed at his scarred abdomen and hooked her free hand around the back of his thigh for stability as she stroked and kneaded the sensitive flesh. Then suddenly she stood, shifting him back then turning them. With his pants around his ankles, Loki lost his balance, forced to sit heavily on the footboard, which apparently was part of her plan. She tugged off his shoes, socks and pants before parting his legs and kneeling down. Her hands rested on his knees then glided up the insides of his thighs. She took his erection in hand again, continuing the enticing motions while licking at his scrotum.
Next she pressed her tongue to the base of his penis, gliding along the underside of the hardening shaft and over the top of the head. Then she reversed course, coating the tense flesh in hot saliva. A low hum of pleasure escaped him with each pass.
He gripped the heavy wooden frame by the fingers and heels to keep from toppling. "The bed," he said, his voice low and husky with desire. "Let's lie down."
She released him so he could scoot onto the mattress and across the covers. He settled among the pillows as she climbed up, still mostly clothed, and crawled to him. Settling on her stomach between his legs, Cami propped on her elbows to put her hands and mouth to work on every inch of his length.
He whispered her name, wanting to express his utter lust for her as all fear, doubt and reason melted from his mind. There was no denying it, he was hers, fully willing and helpless to her intentions. She was his brat, princess, lover and mother to his unborn child—an absolute goddess in his mind—yet she was the one servicing him.
Her dizzying technique pushed him beyond any awareness of their surroundings. Nothing could possibly exist but his pounding heart, labored breaths and the building gratification in his groin. He touched her head, caressing her hair with a feral growl. This sound only spurred Cami on. She picked up the pace of her bobbing, her demanding tongue pushing his tip against the slick roof of her mouth.
Loki couldn't resist the urge to raise and move his hips, quickening the pace and driving him recklessly toward release. He intended to warn her, but his muscles clenched, and he shook and moaned through the powerful orgasm.
Cami kept him in her mouth until he stilled, then proceeded to swallow and lick up the remnants of his seed with a sultry casualness that made him wish they'd gotten around to sharing their kinky lists. He guessed there might be a few surprises on hers.
"You are remarkable, my dearest," he insisted, expecting her to smile, but she just looked sad.
Though he was panting, Loki didn't lounge. He was relaxed, but not tired, which was good considering it was now his turn to bestow affection and stimulation.
Loki followed as Cami rolled off the bed, stopping her from shedding the garments. "Let me," he requested, distracting her with a drawn-out tongue tangle. After that, he placed Cami on the bed and took his time undressing her. He lavished kisses and caresses all over her body, waiting until she was fully nude to spread her legs and tantalize her inner thighs.
"You're such a tease," she said with a giggle.
He decided that was her way of telling him to speed things up a bit. Of course, the abundant juices leaking from her confirmed the theory. Cami jumped when he pressed his mouth to her sex. He kissed and caressed her outer labia before slipping his tongue in deeper to lick the full length of her slit. Her scent was thick in his nostrils and taste delectable.
Wrapping his arms around her thighs, he pulled her closer and buried his mouth within her folds. Skillfully using jaw, lip and tongue action, Loki had her writhing and humming before he'd even ventured another third of an inch higher to her clitoris. Then, as he crested that fateful hill, Cami tensed and began to buck. He kept at it, circling and flicking at the angry-red bud while she screamed his praises.
Only when she went limp beneath him, panting and softly whining from the overload, did he set her loose and crawl up to join her on the pillows.
"Oh," she purred with appreciation, "you are so my god."
She rolled to face him, reaching out to smooth his hair and caress the side of his face. He caught her hand, placing soft kisses on her palm.
"The three of us," Cami said, tears starting in her eyes as she looked down at her stomach, "will never be any closer than this."
He embraced her, letting her cry against his chest so she wouldn't see his own struggle. He wished he could soothe away her fears and pain.
When she'd calmed, Cami coaxed him erect again and guided him into her womb. Their last lovemaking was mindful and cooperative. Slow, gentle motions grew more urgent, but never frenzied. They savored the intimacy and sensations, clinging to each moment of shared bliss until the final chaotic jolt of pleasure.