Once she entered her room she thought the freak out would begin, but she just felt indifferent. She knew Cordelia was going to be angry, that she would get in trouble, but she just didn't care, which was wildly out of character. Maybe it was because she knew that no matter what punishment Cordelia threw her way it wouldn't phase her, her chaotic upbringing numbing her out to anything that wasn't violent.
Maybe this is why foster kids have behavioral problems.
She sat on the floor with a sigh, beginning to sort her clothes into piles, needing to do something besides stew. It made sense, she had far too many by her standards, and half of them were either too big or too small, and a quarter of the remaining weren't even hers, it was only fair that she returned them to their rightful owners.
Since Misty was practically a walking hurricane, her room had grown into a state of disarray, most of her clothes landing on the floor rather than in the closet, much like her roommate's. But since Misty wasn't there, nor were any of her things, everything just seemed off balance, and Elliott hated it.
Downstairs, Cordelia probed Madison's cheekbone, drawing her hand back quickly when the girl hissed, "Sorry," She said quietly, "It looks like it's just bruised."
"Great," Madison said mockingly, "So I just get to walk around with a black eye for two weeks."
"You're lucky she didn't break your face." Queenie shot back, "If I was her I would've."
"Well, she gave you your chance and you blew it." Madison sneered.
"How about round two?" Queenie said, standing up.
"Girls!" Cordelia barked, stopping both of them in their tracks, "Queenie, will you please go help Zoe while I take care of this?"
Queenie let out a grumble, but still followed the request. "Jeez, what is it with you and girls with anger issues?" Madison mumbled, Cordelia letting out a snicker against her better judgement.
"You're one of them, you know." Cordelia teased, pressing an ice pack to the girl's face.
"I know, that's why I get to say it." Madison shot back, "It's not my fault I'm everyone's punching bag."
"You don't have to instigate." Cordelia fired back, "It wasn't right, but Elliott wouldn't have hit you if you didn't push her."
"Please, I could tell she was heading for a breakdown this morning." Madison sneered, standing up, "All I did was give her someone to project it on."
"Madison, she was fine earlier." Cordelia said, "She just wasn't feeling well."
"Whatever you need to tell yourself." Madison muttered, making sure to quickly leave the room in search of her friends as Cordelia rolled her eyes. She would be lying if she said Elliott hadn't been a little temperamental lately, but it wasn't without cause, all the girls were on edge, even herself. Still, the supreme knew the starlet was only trying to get under her skin, something she was damn good at.
When Cordelia pushed open Elliott's door and spotted her sorting on the floor her breath hitched, the scene feeling far too familiar for her comfort. "What are you doing?" Cordelia asked quickly, Elliott not even bothering to raise her head.
"I have too many clothes." She mumbled, shaking her head before throwing a shirt into one of the piles.
"What?" Cordelia asked, still unable to shake the memories of Elliott leaving from her mind.
"I have too many clothes." Elliott said a little louder.
"For what?" Cordelia asked, hesitantly taking a step further into the room.
"I don't know… existing?" Elliott said sarcastically, glancing up and pointing to a pile near Cordelia's feet, "Those are yours."
Cordelia glanced down at the pile briefly, before refocusing on the task at hand, "We need to talk, come sit down."
"I can multitask." Elliott said offhandedly, picking up a pair of pants and tossing them towards her closet.
"I want you to focus." Cordelia tried again, moving to sit on the bed.
"It's not like I don't already know what you are going to say." Elliott said pointedly.
Cordelia let out a defeated sigh, she didn't understand why Elliott was being so difficult, but if Cordelia didn't budge they'd be there all night, "You can't hit people."
"Mhmm." Elliott hummed in a halfhearted attempt to prove she was listening.
"More importantly you can't use other people to hit people." Cordelia continued, trying not to let Elliott's blatant disregard set her off.
"Please, Queenie's been dying to deck her for weeks." Elliott said sarcastically, Cordelia pinching the bridge of her nose in an attempt to ease her frustration.
"That might be, but it isn't up to you to make that choice." Cordelia managed to squeak out in the most even tone she could muster, "Madison is supposed to be your friend."
Elliott shook her head, "She isn't my friend."
"Elle," Cordelia said in disbelief, "You spend more time with her than anyone else."
"Yea, I'm not saying I don't love her. I'm just saying she doesn't exactly fit into the friend category" Elliott said, glancing up, "I don't know what she is."
Cordelia shook her head, "Regardless, you made a poor choice."
Cordelia could feel the energy in the room spike, Elliott snapping her head up, "A choice you don't agree with."
"A choice the law doesn't agree with." Cordelia argued, trying her best to reason with the girl.
Elliott let out a breathy laugh, "I'm sure if you introduced Madison to a judge they would understand."
"Elle…" Cordelia grumbled, launching into a lecture right as Elliott's hand came in contact with something velvet. The young witch glanced down momentarily, only to see Misty's shawl tangled up in her sweater, Cordelia's words quickly fading to the background. It was one of Misty's favorites, the same one she wrapped Elliott up in when the temperature dropped that night at the street fair, after she noticed Elliott's skin breaking out in goosebumps despite her protests that she was fine.
"Are you even listening to me?" Cordelia said, causing Elliott to break out of her trance and throw an annoyed look in her mother's direction, her pounding headache returning full force. One look at Elliott's face and the woman knew she hadn't heard a damn word, letting out a frustrated sigh and motioning to the bed, "Sit."
Elliott rolled her eyes as she stood, walking over to the bed and making sure to push herself into the corner on the opposite end of her mother, pulling her knees to her chest as Cordelia started to talk again, "What the hell is going on with you?"
"Nothing." Elliott murmured, trying her best to focus as the tears welled in her eyes before finally deciding to rest her elbows on her knees and drop her head into her hands so the woman couldn't see her face. She knew she was being difficult, and she wasn't trying to be, but in that moment all she wanted was for it all to be over and Cordelia to be as far away as possible.
"Obviously it isn't nothing, Elliott." Cordelia said, her frustration finally getting the best of her. Elliott didn't seem to have any remorse for what she did, it seemed like she didn't care at all. Elliott didn't say anything, so Cordelia tried again, "Elle, look at me."
It took a moment for the girl to react, trying to clear her cloudy eyes, knowing if Cordelia saw them it would just lead to more questions and a longer conversation, but she finally lifted her head, looking Cordelia square in the eye, the woman looking at her like she was waiting for some sort of answer Elliott couldn't give, "I can't hit people. I got it."
"Can you cut the attitude?" Cordelia snapped, Elliott glaring in return.
"Sorry," Elliott said condescendingly, "I need to go to sleep so I was hoping to speed this along."
"You just got up." Cordelia said pointedly, Elliott rubbing her temples.
"I have a headache." Elliott shot back.
"You took medicine." Cordelia responded.
"That doesn't mean it's helping." Elliott said, obviously annoyed at the rapid fire. Cordelia said something but Elliott couldn't quite hear, her voice sounding far away, "What?"
Cordelia stared at her curiously for a moment, seemingly trying to decide if something was actually going on or Elliott was just being difficult, "I said we need to take you to see the doctor."
"Why?" Elliott grumbled, already hating the direction this was taking.
"Because," Cordelia responded, "Your concussion is supposed to be getting better, not worse."
Elliott sighed, "It's not the concussion."
"Elliott, this isn't normal behavior for you." Cordelia said, trying to find a cause for the chaos, "You've had a headache two days in a row."
"They're stress headaches." Elliott mumbled, feeling her heartbeat pick up and her breath quicken.
Cordelia could feel the shift in energy, not that she needed to with the way Elliott was fidgeting, "You're on break, you shouldn't be getting stress headaches."
"You would think, wouldn't you?" Elliott said sarcastically, dropping her head back into her hands. This wasn't good, none of this was good. She could feel herself getting worked up, something was setting her off, but she couldn't figure out what. Her energy dropped dramatically right as she dug her hands into her hair and started tugging on the roots, digging her nails into her scalp as she desperately tried to ground herself.
"Hey, don't do that." Cordelia said carefully, reaching for Elliott's hands, "You're going to hurt yourself."
Right as Cordelia's hands made contact with Elliott's the girl jerked back, snapping her head up and growling, "Don't touch me."
Cordelia pulled back as if she was burned, the shock on her features evident. Something was definitely wrong, but Elliott wasn't talking, so she tried to deescalate, pulling her hands back with her palms up in surrender. "Elliott," She said carefully, "What is going on with you?"
Elliott could hear every syllable pounding in her eardrum, the oversensitivity making her want to lose it, her words biting, "Nothing is going on with me. I just really don't need the lecture."
"Obviously you do." Cordelia bit back, instantly regretting it the moment Elliott's brows ticked up, like Cordelia had just given her exactly what she had been looking for all along.
Elliott let out a sinister laugh, "I don't need to be parented right now. I made it fifteen years on my own, thank you."
Cordelia clenched her jaw, the muscles clenching and releasing as she tried to formulate a response. Cordelia didn't see this side of Elliott often, but when she did it was always brutal. Elliott really knew exactly where to twist the knife. "Do you remember what you were doing during that time, Elliott?" She finally spit out, watching Elliott's eyes go hard, "You did what you had to do to survive and I understand that, but don't kid yourself into thinking that it was by any means a good decision."
Elliot huffed, "Well it seemed to work out just fine, didn't it?"
"Considering where we are right now?" Cordelia asked, "No, not really."
Elliott rolled her eyes and stood, refocusing on cleaning her room while Cordelia tried to calm herself down, knowing the argument was only a distraction from the real issue. She took a deep breath before continuing, "Look, it's my job to correct past behavior and make sure you can be a functioning person in this world. I'm going to-"
Elliott's head snapped back as she cut her off, her blood boiling, "I'm sorry, you're going to be the one to teach me how to be a functioning person?"
"Yes, Elliott, I am. You can't just go around hitting people." Cordelia practically yelled, trying but failing to ignore the obvious dig, "That's now how we handle things."
"That's not how you handle things." Elliott seethed, "Just because it's not how you would handle it doesn't mean it's wrong."
"Using your abilities to hurt someone else is always wrong." Cordelia yelled, her anger finally getting the best of her as she stood.
"It was an accident!" Elliott yelled back, "It happens! I'm sorry!"
"That wasn't an accident." Cordelia spit out, "You know how to control it, don't give me that."
"Oh, like you've never lost control of your powers." Elliott spit back, "You can't always control yours but somehow I'm supposed to keep mine in check?"
"You can't afford not to." Cordelia responded without thinking.
"And why is that?" Elliott asked bitterly, knowing the answer. She was baiting the supreme and she knew it, but it was better to get it out of the way instead of tiptoeing around it.
Cordelia realized what she had said, what she had inadvertently given away and immediately locked up, "Elliott, I do not have time for this."
Elliott's eyebrows ticked up again in what Cordelia quickly realized was a telltale sign that she was going to push things farther than she should, her shoulders squaring as her face set, "Then don't make the time."
Elliott didn't even give her mother the time to react before she brushed past her and headed for the stairs, leaving Cordelia to trail behind her.
"Elliott, stop." Cordelia said, reaching for the girl, "I didn't mean…."
"So, let me get this straight." Elliott said, stopping in her tracks and looking Cordelia in the eye, "You don't have time for me and you obviously don't have time for Misty, so who do you have time for?"
Cordelia didn't respond, the shellshock ripping all the words from her mouth. Elliott only hummed in response before turning on her heel and walking out the front door, not at all surprised when Cordelia didn't follow. She knew it was only a matter of time before the shock wore off, so she headed for the nearest bus stop and ran to catch the first one she saw, disregarding the weird looks she got, until she sat down and realized in her haste that she had left in only her socks.
Back at the house, Cordelia sat down in her office and dropped her head in her hands. She did think about going after her daughter, but she also knew Elliott well enough to know it was useless. She was furious with the way Elliott had acted, but she also knew it wasn't completely unwarranted. Cordelia never should have said she didn't have time for her, but she froze, not wanting her daughter to know the truth, and it was the only thing she could think of to halt the conversation in its tracks.
A larger part of Cordelia couldn't help but think Elliott was looking for a fight from the beginning, a careful bait and switch to rile the both of them up, but why? The easiest answer was Misty. The jabs were obvious, the last one being the real knockout, but Elliott didn't seem as inclined to fix it as she did in the past, not to mention her attitude had been persistent for days.
Maybe it really was nothing like Elliott said it was, maybe she was just settling into her role as the stereotypical always-angry teen, although Cordelia was seriously hoping that wasn't the case. It had to be something else, Cordelia knew it in her gut. Elliott's energy was all over the place and had been for days, even when she was dealing with the concussion it was more stable than that. But once again, Elliott didn't seem to keen on talking, and everything Cordelia did just seemed to make her dig in further.
Meanwhile, Elliott had managed to exit the bus at the first stop she recognized, heading over to a park she hadn't visited since she was a child and sitting on the abandoned swings, dragging her feet in the overgrown grass, if she could even call it that. The joint of the swing let out a groan as she slowly swung back and forth, the reality of what she did closing in and forcing tears from her eyes. She didn't know why she did it, she just knew she was angry and needed someone to take it out on. She thought hitting Madison would help, that it would bring about some sort of relief, but all it did was make her knuckles swell and throb, the feeling only making her feel more like a wounded animal. She didn't mean to take it out on Cordelia, she just wanted everything to stop. She tried to warn her, bad things always happened on this day, they always had.
"Hey," Someone called out, "You can't be here. The park closes at dusk."
Elliott snapped her head up, glaring towards the sound as a police officer came into view. He made it all of three steps forward before his nose started bleeding, his hands coming up to paw at his throat, Elliott's eyes going wide as she immediately pulled back. The two stared at each other for a moment before Elliott got back in his head. "Go home." She said quietly, holding her breath until the man returned to his car, then swallowing thickly.
It was three years prior that Elliott had taken a life for the first time, and it never got easier. She was on a run for Thomas, and the man tried to stiff her.
What are you going to do, little girl? Fight me?
He started to walk away, then he just dropped.
When Elliott returned to Thomas and told him what happened, he was proud. He told her she did a good job, and that he always knew she was his favorite, his face twisted into a smile that only made Elliott's skin crawl and hands shake. That night she told David everything and he put a stop to it, at least until Elliott decided the money was worth whatever mortal sins she had to commit to stay alive. It was the only kill she never could justify, the one that haunted her to her bones. There was a piece of her that died that day, and she never could seem to get it back, as good as she tried to be. It was just never enough.
Maybe that was why everything had gone south so quickly, maybe her own lies were catching up. Elliott didn't even want to begin to think of how she was going to go back and face Cordelia, how she was going to explain herself when her brain was still moving faster than she could even comprehend.
She couldn't deny she was upset about Misty, despite her attempts to stay out of it. Elliott knew she was the excuse Cordelia gave, she always was the excuse, the scapegoat. Elliott never wanted to be the reason Cordelia wasn't happy, but no matter what she did, it seemed like she was always the issue, and she hated it. She never wanted to be a burden, never wanted to make Cordelia have to give up the things she loved, but it didn't seem to matter, and Elliott couldn't fight the guilt that ran through her veins every time something went wrong with their relationship. A part of her wished Cordelia would just say enough was enough, so Elliott could stop trying to navigate it all, so Elliott could live her life and Cordelia could live hers, not that she really thought it would solve the issue, but it would at least solve it for her.
The realization for the nights events dawned on her slowly, and Elliott fought it like the stubborn girl she was. As much as she liked to play dumb, Elliott knew why she was fighting, she knew all along. They were too close, and everything Elliott had ever held dear had either died or left. David left, Misty left, so Elliott pushed with everything she had. She pushed against Madison, she pushed against Cordelia. She was scared, so she burned it down.
Must be hereditary.