Great. Yassen was even more of a grouchy asshole than usual. Alex smothered a sigh. That meant the man was probably cross with everything and overcompensating. It was partially Alex's fault (okay, most of it was) and he certainly didn't blame the man for being in a mood. With any luck, he'd mellow out soon enough, but in the meantime there was the very real possibility he might actually murder K-unit.

If Alex had thought babysitting a high Yassen was bad, now he had to watch the man like a hawk while he was sober and well aware of what Alex was up to.

Brilliant. Just fucking briliant.

At least the codes idea was promising; Yassen wouldn't have said so otherwise.

Smithers picked up right away. "You 've had a busy night, I take it."

The small teen couldn't help it; he perked right up hearing his old friend's voice. "I'll say," Alex said without thinking. "Yassen stole a tank. It was crazy."

Said assassin gave Alex a dirty look. Right. He probably should stick to the lie, and maybe let Yassen decide the flow of information for the call.

"Ah, Alex, my boy," Smithers said, a genuine touch of delight inflecting his voice. "I take it the night was quite exciting for you as well. You are doing well, I trust?"

"Yes, just tired. How are-"

Yassen gave him a flat look. "Can we cut to the chase, Smithers?" he demanded. "I've got at least a half dozen calls to make this morning regarding last night. I'm only calling you to prevent you from leaving obvious contact records at my building. Exactly what couldn't wait?"

"Of course, of course. I imagine you have quite a bit to deal with," Smithers assured him. "However, I am glad I caught you first. There are a few things we need to discuss and perhaps it's best that Alex is along for this ride too. Now, exactly why did you attack the surveillance team last night in a tank?"

Yassen glared at the ceiling, jaw set and working slightly. Alex had no doubt in his mind that he was half wishing the floor would swallow him as he contemplated just how to approach the topic of his behavior in the last twenty-four hours.

There really was no better way, though. Alex was ninety percent certain there was no discrete way to phrase it.

"I accidentally drugged Yassen," Alex supplied helpfully, after about five seconds of dead air from the other man. Maybe he'd best just lead the charge for both of them. "He was really, very high and definitely not in his right mind. He's sober now, though. The official story I arranged for is that I was high and I drove the tank because I was cross to see K-unit in Moscow after what happened in Kingman. They're fine, by the way. It's just going to be a lot easier this way."

Smithers hissed through his teeth. "You know, my dear boy, you may damage your credibility as a witness if anything like this happens again."

Alex snorted. "Oh, don't worry. I'm going to be much more proactive about labeling my pot brownies, I promise. Besides, the SVR killed all the security footage they could find for us." Alex sobered, staring down at the little screen. "Mr. Smithers? Last night, I noticed that the iPod can spot all your other surveillance tech. K-unit definitely has some. Is there any way for you to figure out if K-unit got any footage of us?"

"There is, actually." Smithers voice cheered a bit. "Though I'm afraid my method is startling low tech."

Yassen broke in, seemingly having regained control of his vocal chords. "And what way is that?"

"My mole, of course," Smithers said blandly. "That's what I called to discuss with you, Mr. Gregorovitch. As Alex mentioned, the only real threat to you from that team is if they've managed to get footage of you two. I assure you, my man on the inside has deleted all the evidence and gently misled the rest of the team as to why their reports are going to leave out the incident with the tank. I've just checked in with him to confirm. Given your rather… definitive tendencies regarding loose ends, I considered it imperative to call you before you could accidentally execute one of my best sources of intel within MI6. K-unit must be spared any cautionary bullets you may feel inclined to dispense."

Alex grinned with relief. "Oh, great! I was just talking to him about that-"

Yassen pinched the bridge of his nose, giving Alex a stern look that made no promises. "Your man is on that team? Which one?"

"Well, I'm afraid I'm not sure I should say. His situation is rather precarious."

"Let me guess," Yassen snapped. "He's the spy. Ben Daniels."

"Now that you mention it, it is rather obvious," Smithers sighed. "Ah, well. Yes. Mr. Daniels has been working with me for a few weeks now, slipping me intel as possible and directing Mi6's attention as best he can."

Alex stared at his hands. "Ben's helping the case? What about the rest of the unit?"

"Their position is a little more… nebulous." Smithers sounded almost apologetic. "While none of them are truly trusting of MI6, they don't know about Daniels and my cooperation, nor our true goals. He's considered looping them in, and will likely be forced to at some point in the future, but for now we'd rather they remain ignorant of the current state of things. Gives us time to prepare. The fewer people we have in our little treason circle, the less risk to all of us, you understand."

"How well have you vetted him?" Yassen crossed one arm across his chest, wincing. He moved it off of his stomach. It occurred to Alex suddenly that he might be in some sort of pain. He had eaten a lot of odd things last night. "I trust you're not taking him at his word."

"Of course not." Despite the conversation at hand, Alex was slightly bemused to realize that while both of the men were obviously a little annoyed with each other, neither was taking direct offense at the pointed questions of the other. He'd known they'd chatted without him before, but he didn't expect this… almost friendly professionalism, sans more than the bare bones of trust. It was a little bizarre. "I've been vetting him slowly and thoroughly. While I'd say there's an eighty percent chance that Jones will try to onboard him, I'm quite confident that he hasn't gone through that process yet. By that point, I intend to have my own hooks in him."

"Such as?"

"Oh, such as plenty of evidence that he's committed treason with me. I've got a few other factors in the works, though it likely won't be necessary: guilt seems to be working quite nicely on its own."

Yassen snorted. "Really?"

"He's new to the spy world," Smithers tutted. Despite the inherent tension to the moment, his voice carried a faint touch of blithe amusement. "Hardly a year into his career, actually, and only seven months or so into field work. Hasn't quite shed all of his expectations and hopes for humanity and his government. Lovely chap, really."

Yassen scowled. "And you're trusting him with such little practical experience?"

"To some extent, yes. Fortunately for us, his role in the scheme of things is fairly small, but his instincts are good and he's nosy to a fault. He's already managed to get ahold of a lot of intel for me just because he was so determined to figure out what happened to Alex after you two broke out of prison. Upset at how much didn't add up. Made quite the nuisance of himself, without necessarily arousing more than passing suspicion. It was his personality rather than my own requests driving things after all. I doubt Jones suspects him of working with me yet." Smithers paused. "There is another thing I think it wise to bring up. Perhaps Alex ought to duck out..."

Alex furrowed his brows. "What? What is it you don't want me to hear?"

Yassen gave him a quick glance. "I'll likely tell him anyway, even if he doesn't like what he hears. You might as well."

"I can see why you two get along. A much nicer change than getting curated information from MI6, I suppose."

"You're not wrong," Alex admitted.

"Forgive me, then. Daniels has shared with me a theory that occurred to him the other night. You see, when he realized that Alex had overheard some of their conversation, he became concerned that Alex hadn't gotten enough information to understand how harmless their mission is. That he'd go running back to you with the wrong idea and that you'd soon be out for their blood."

"That would explain why they pursued us so aggressively," Yassen muttered. "You realize that means Daniels is an idiot to have kept approaching us like that? Had I been sober, I likely would have killed him."

"Agent Daniels' wisdom aside," Smithers went on. "That's exactly what his fear was. That had you realized who had been sent to observe you- three soldiers and a spy- that you'd take the action as an aggressive one regardless of how they behaved. That you'd do the cautious thing, as you've been known to: eliminate the threat as discreetly as possible."

Yassen leaned against the counter top, obviously not inclined to counter the point. "Go on."

"Essentially, his theory is that the mission presented to the team is not the primary one at hand. Yes, MI6 might get some value out of them being here if it turns out Alex does respond positively to them or if they find evidence that you are abusing the boy, but that may not be their true purpose. That they are bait, designed to draw your fire while a second, theoretical team documents it as best they can."

Yassen didn't so much as blink. "Have you confirmed the existence of a second team?"

"Yes and no." Smithers hesitated. "I've not found a list of names, nor witnesses to any strange movements of agents in Moscow. However, I have observed some more... nebulous factors in play. Shadows of a team, one might say. Resources and money switching accounts in proximity to known Russian assets. The odd, almost half-arsed nature of Operation Nannycam itself-"

"Operation what?" Alex demanded.

Smithers continued on without so much as a break. "-the way it could easily be misinterpreted as more aggressive than it actually is. I'm not positive, but I'd say it's likely that something is going on in the background. A setup of some kind. Enticing a killer to kill isn't remotely out of their wheelhouse."

Alex stared at the tiny iPod screen, his outrage displaced by a sudden hollow feeling. MI6 was just going to discard K-unit? Send them off to die like cheap bait just so they could make Yassen look bad?

He was livid. Not surprised, not remotely, but livid.

Smithers cleared his throat. "This serves a dual purpose, of course, assuming they can ensure you are caught and connected to their deaths. Proving both that you are likely Yassen Gregorovitch in court and, if not that, that you are at minimum an unfit guardian for a child."
Alex looked sharply at his carer. The man was considering the iPod screen with a pensive expression, clearly turning a few thoughts over. "Why would they do that?" the boy demanded. "Russia isn't going to send me back. I've had this conversation eight different ways with Vankin. They can't legally make me go back if I don't want to."

Smithers voice brightened a notch, though Alex could hear the tightness lurking behind the words. "You are right, my good fellow, they cannot. But I suspect- and this is based off some other intel I have- that they are hoping to have you two separated. Force the government to move you elsewhere if only for the sake of international appearances: mustn't have a victimized child living with a confirmed killer after all. Likely, MI6 aims to move you somewhere you will have less protection or somewhere they can influence directly. That's why there's so much emphasis on proving Yassen unfit. They don't have to prove their own innocence or why you should be forced to return against your will, merely move you closer towards their grasp."

Alex clenched his fists. "So they want to kidnap me."

"Ultimately, yes, I believe they do. Moscow is the worst possible place for that, though. Too many watchers, too likely to fail while leaving strong evidence that the UN will not take lightly. Jones is taking quite a risk, one I don't entirely understand, but one which we mustn't underestimate."

Yassen shifted closer to Alex. "Exactly what play are you suggesting?"

"Less of a play as yet, more of an approach." Smithers cleared his throat. "Needless to say, first on that list is that you are to, under no circumstances, attempt to assassinate K-unit. I trust we are clear on that. I can't keep finding moles, Gregorovitch; they don't grow on trees. Don't waste this one, please."

The man addressed actually rolled his eyes. "Fine."

Alex nearly fell over.

"My second recommendation is to utilize K-unit in our favor." Smithers' voice grew a touch grim. A rhythmic clicking started up on his end of the line, as though he were fiddling with a pen. "If Jones is going to turn on some music, she really shouldn't be surprised if you'd like to dance. Let's give her a mission that appears to be succeeding despite all expectations."

Yassen raised an eyebrow. "In what manner?"

"If you refuse to either kill them or acknowledge the team as a real threat, there is little for that second, secret team to do. Let's render them wholly useless. K-unit is already on documentation duty, so let's use them. In fact, let's give Alex an iPhone and a new Facebook account. Take lots of pictures of him visiting his old buddies. Tag everything. Use an excess of unnecessary emoticons."

Yassen scowled as Alex's eyebrows shot up. "Absolutely not. That's an utter security nightmare. The points of entry and weakness that that would reveal-"

"Are less than the ones we gain," Smithers countered. "Alex is suddenly very visible, surrounded by friendly British soldiers. How does he know said soldiers? It's certainly suspicious that they are very, very familiar. Old friends from home. Maybe he entices them to reference Brecon Beacons on video, maybe he doesn't. Either is fine. It doesn't have to help the court case, because it renders MI6 unable to use this contact to harm it. No signs of abuse or neglect. No obvious security flaws. Just a secure, relaxed child who may or may not suffer from a drug problem and an assassin who refuses to prove his profession while the case moves forward."

Yassen shook his head with a quick glance at Alex. "There's a flaw in your plan. Who's to say this second team isn't repurposed in the face of all this access to Alex. Instead of documenting my actions against K-unit, Jones switches the mystery team to extracting him directly."

"Precisely. They'll play directly into our hands." Smithers' voice hardened. The clicking pen stopped. "You see, K-unit will almost certainly have to be involved in said extraction. They're the ones with the access. They're the ones who are succeeding at their supposed mission to earn Alex's trust. Either the other team will have to work in conjunction with them, or K-unit will be tasked with the actual snatching. If and when that happens, we'll have Daniels and possibly the whole team to leak us the information in real time. Not only will we be able to foil the attempt itself, we might be able to use it against Jones if we can get enough evidence. From what I understand, the prime minister and foreign secretary are edging closer and closer to removing her altogether."

Alex bit his lip, chewing that over. "So I'll be the bait instead."

Smithers sighed. "In a sense. I'm really very sorry it's like this again- these things never seem to go your way and I fear that it's no different now. Please believe me, I'd much rather you be left alone. I've gone over it again and again, my dear boy. I really can't come up with a safer option. Otherwise, we won't be able to control the flow of information to MI6, or guide their actions, or have the chance to compromise what I see as an inevitable attempt to abduct you. I have no other way to track the second team, even if I'm quite convinced they exist. The next best thing I can do is to try to choose how we encounter them and on what terms."

Alex stared at his hands. It didn't exactly sound like the worst thing ever but…

A wave of weariness washed over him. Something bitter crawled into his throat. It wasn't Smithers fault, of course. It was Jones', not that having the right person to blame did him much good. One day, he'd like to live without all this: the constant interference from strangers in his life, the constant sense of ever present threats hiding behind misrepresented motivations, the need to be on his toes all the time. It was beginning to feel like a pipe dream. He could barely remember what it was like not to have anything like this simmering in the background, pulling him away from his day-to-day life before he could settle into it enough to trust that it would be there tomorrow. If he even had it in him to trust like that anymore. No wonder his anxiety couldn't fade- constant vigilance was an on and off thing that he actually needed to have to survive.

Yassen studied him, frowning slightly. Of course he wouldn't like the idea of Alex being out in the open, consorting with K-unit, and deliberately being dangled in front of MI6. His lack of an immediate counter point told Alex that he was considering it anyway, with that damn objectivity the teen both admired and despised.

Still, this did sound like the best option. For them both. For K-unit. If all went well, nobody would get killed on Alex's behalf.

Maybe not even Alex himself.

Putting his hand on Yassen's forearm, Alex met his eyes and nodded.

"Fine," Yassen snapped into the microphone. "Let's discuss this smartphone idea."