Special thanks to nintendoscript15, who helped with these.
[BGM: Timed Event - Super Mario Sunshine]
1: "GOOP GENERATOR AT DELFINO AIRSTRIP"
Aqua: Eww! What is that yucky stuff?
Mario: I don't know. It looks like a giant-
[Mario accidentally steps on a splotch of goop and falls on his bottom. Everyone starts laughing immediately.]
Mario: Wha- How d-did I not s-see th-that g-goop next t-to my sh-shoe?!
[Aqua helps Mario back up.]
Mario: I'm s-sorry!
Aqua: It's n-not y-your f-fault!
[Mario bends over, laughing hard.]
2: "COURTHOUSE TRIAL"
Prosecutor: Behold these sketches of the perpretrators based-
[The four heroes suddenly start laughing at the sight of the sketches. Everyone else but the judge and prosecutor crack up too.]
Mario: Wh-why d-did y-you draw th-them like th-that, Toad?!
Toad (offscreen): It w-wasn't m-me, Mario!
Mario: D-don't l-lie!
3: "COURTHOUSE TRIAL"
Peach: I can't believe you people! Your government is terrible!
Daisy: This is a load of bullcrap! You-
[Daisy immediately covers her mouth, having accidentally said the wrong word in her line. Mario, Luigi, and Aqua become shocked.]
Aqua: Hey! That's not nice, Daisy!
Daisy: I'm sorry! It was just a slip! I wasn't thinking!
Director (offscreen): It's okay, Daisy. Just tone it down when we restart.
4: "DAISY'S FIRST APPEARANCE"
Daisy: Hi, Mario!
Mario: Daisy! Nice to see you again!
[Daisy and Mario hug each other, but Daisy squeezes Mario a bit too tight.]
Mario: Daisy..! Too tight...!
[Daisy lets go of Mario, who starts coughing.]
Daisy: I'm so sorry! I forgot I was supposed to loosen the hug.
Mario: Geez...! You must've been so excited...
5: "DISCUSSING ADVENTURE IN RICCO HARBOR"
Mario: Yes, surprisingly enough. You see, I went into this ghost house once...
[Mario stops because he forgets his line.]
Mario: Uh... Darn it! I got stumped!
[Everyone but Mario starts laughing.]
Aqua: C-come on! W-we w-were d-doing so g-good!
Mario: Can you give me the script for a second? I need to refresh my memory.
6: "MECHA-BOWSER RISES"
[Mario and Aqua stare at Mecha Bowser with their jaws dropped.]
FLUDD: What happened? Did the perpetrators get-
[Mario loses it and places his hand on his head. Aqua giggles too.]
Mario: N-no! W-why? I w-wasn't s-supposed to l-laugh!
[Mario calms down a bit.]
Mario: Urgh! If only I held that straight face until Mecha Bowser did its fire breath.
Director (offscreen): All right. Lower the robot, please.
7: "MECHA-BOWSER RISES"
[Mario and Aqua stare at Mecha Bowser with their jaws dropped.]
FLUDD: What happened? Did the perpetr-
[Mario suddenly sneezes, making everyone laugh.]
Aqua: B-bless y-you!
Mario: A-again w-with th-that face! Darn!
8: "PEACH GETS KIDNAPPED"
Peach (offscreen): AAAAHHHH!
[Mario and Aqua wake up immediately.]
Aqua: What was that?!
Mario: It must be Princess Peach!
[Toadsworth hurriedly opens the door, but slips forward upon stepping into the room. Everyone but Mario and Toadsworth start laughing.]
Toadsworth: Ouch...!
Mario: Are you okay?
[Mario runs up to Toadsworth and helps him up.]
Toadsworth: I didn't see that door step right there!
9: "SECRET SHINE IN BELL TOWER"
Toad: So, what's your plan?
Toadette: Simple. Use your head.
Toad: Uh, I don't have any idea-
[Toadette picks up Toad with his head forward.]
Toad: I mean use it LITERALLY!
[Toad screams while Toadette runs toward the bell tower doors, but they don't break open right when Toad's head hit them. Toad and Toadette fall on the ground.]
Toad: Oww!
10: "AFTERMATH OF NOKI BAY SECRET LEVEL"
Aqua: Sorry, Luigi. That song was so cool, I couldn't stop singing.
Luigi: It's okay. I understand.
[Daisy gets irritated at Mario still singing.]
Daisy: MARIO! I SAID, "THAT'S ENOUGH!"
[Daisy pushes Mario into the water out of rage. But right when Mario goes off the edge, he accidentally grabs Daisy's dress. Both fall into the water. Aqua and Luigi laugh hard.]
Aqua: Wh-what?!
[Mario and Daisy surface; both start laughing too.]
Daisy: M-Mario! W-why did y-you do th-that?
Mario: I g-got s-scared! I w-wasn't e-expecting it!
11: "FLUDD MAKES MARIO TALK ABOUT HIS FEELINGS FOR PEACH"
FLUDD: Mario does happen to have romantic feelings for Princess Peach. He's just too shy to admit it.
Mario: FLUDD!
FLUDD: Someone had to say it!
Mario: Okay, fine! I do love your sister, okay? I-
Director (offscreen) Cut!
[Right as the director stops the scene, Aqua and Mario start laughing.]
FLUDD: Was that part of the script?
Mario: I-I m-meant "like"! No!
12. "FAKER"
Take 1
Mario: We found you, faker!
Shadow Mario: Faker?! I think YOU'RE the fake plumber around here! You're comparing yourself to ME?! HA! You're not even-... You're not-... Ugh! Where's that damn SA2 script?!
Mario and Aqua: *giggle*
Director: Haha! '-good enough to be my fake'
Take 2
Shadow Mario: You're not even-
Shadow: Hey! Those are my lines!
[Shadow the Hedgehog Chaos Controls into the scene out of nowhere]
Director: Get off the set!
Shadow: Fine, but you owe me 1000 rings for ripping off my scene! Chaos Control!
[He disappears]
Mario and Shadow Mario: ...
Aqua: Uh... who was that?
13. "ENCOUNTERING BOWSER"
Take 1
Bowser: MARIO! How dare you disturb my family vacation?! ROOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRR!
[No one was intimated, however, and just laughed at him.]
Mario: Sorry, Sorry, it's just s-so f-funny! One more take, please
Take 8
Bowser: MARIO! How dare you disturb my family vacation?! ROOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRR!
[They all laugh even harder and Bowser just facepalms.]
Peach: O-Oh my G-God, my heart can't...
[Peach continued laughing even harder.]
Take 15
Bowser: MARIO! How dare you disturb my family vacation?! ROOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRR!
[Everyone STILL continued to laugh and Bowser began to cry.]
Bowser: This is the 15th take. I cannot work like this! I will be in my trailer.
[Bowser walks off-screen.]
[BGM: Too Bad! - Super Mario Sunshine]