December 2026
I kick my shoes off by the door and dump my jacket and bag on the couch, too tired to put anything away. There's no sign of Noah in the living room or the kitchen, which doesn't surprise me, and my suspicions are confirmed when I peek into Julia's room. They're both asleep, Noah comically folded into the narrow sliver of bed left unoccupied by Julia's sprawl and the pile of books they must have read. She always begs him to stay just five more minutes after reading stories, and then another five minutes, and another, with this being the usual result on nights when I get home after her bedtime. At least this should be my last late arrival for a while—finals start tomorrow and tonight's review session marked the end of my last teaching assistantship. Not that next semester will be any easier, but at least writing my thesis won't require me to stay on campus late so often.
Cleo shows up at my feet, insistently butting her head against my ankles and meowing piteously until I follow her to the kitchen. I'm sure Noah already fed her, but that's never stopped Cleo from feigning starvation in the hopes of conning a second dinner out of me, and I know from experience she's not going to stop pestering until she gets what she wants.
"Suddenly you don't mind me so much when I'm your only option for snacks, don't you?" I comment, and there's something strangely familiar about the smug expression on the gray tabby's face as she watches me shake kibble into her bowl.
I was the one who wanted a cat and Noah was the one adamantly opposed, so of course he's Cleo's favorite human. She patiently puts up with five-year old Julia's overeager affections, she mostly tolerates me, but she loves Noah. Noah still claims not to like cats, and yet he's the one who bought the fourth Christmas stocking currently hanging from our mantle, stuffed with cat treats. Well, the wall shelf we're pretending is a mantle, since actual fireplaces are hard to come by in Stanford family housing. The other three stockings remain empty, reminding me of all the shopping still to be finished before we drive down to LA for the holidays. But that'll have to wait, because tonight all I want is to crawl into bed.
Noah probably put dinner leftovers in the refrigerator for me, but I'm too tired to investigate. Besides, the smell of the cat food killed what little appetite I had. Instead I head to our bedroom, collapsing face-down into the bed. I should go wake Noah up and get myself ready for bed, but I think I need a nap first just to summon the energy to do that. The end of the semester always wipes me out, but this one's been particularly brutal, and I'm not sure I can remember ever feeling quite this exhausted.
Suddenly my eyes fly open. As close to falling asleep as I'd been a second ago, now I'm completely awake, my heart pounding. I do remember being this dead-tired before. It was the end of a semester then, too, except it was only weeks later than I realized the actual cause of my exhaustion—Julia. Because the only other time I've felt this relentlessly tired no matter how much sleep I got was... while pregnant. Holy shit, I'm an idiot. A pregnant idiot.
I can't help laughing as the evidence comes together in my mind, not just the exhaustion but a lot of other missed clues obvious in retrospect. How disgusting cat food and so many other things have smelled lately, my sobbing over a cheesy movie last weekend, the fact I had to go digging for the stretchiest of my bras this morning. And, of course, the lack of period, but I'd figured that was just my body still sorting itself out from stopping the pill two months ago. Which is the real reason this shouldn't come as any surprise, not when getting pregnant was the exact goal of going off birth control, but I guess I'd assumed it would take longer. I should take a test to be sure, but... I already am.
My mind is still racing with all the implications of this realization when Noah walks into the room.
"Were you going to let me sleep in there all night?" Noah grumbles good-naturedly as he sits down next to me. I'm too distracted to respond, but I roll over to face him, wondering what to say. It's not that I'm worried about his reaction—this was very much a joint endeavor and I know he's going to be thrilled—but it's still pretty overwhelming news to need to share.
Thankfully, Noah doesn't seem to have noticed my state of mild panic. "Did you find that lasagna I saved for you?"
The thought of cheesy pasta immediately turns my stomach, and I shake my head. "I'm not hungry. Too tired."
"Tonight was the last review session, right? I'll take Julia to the playground in the morning so you can sleep in. And next week we can pawn her off on our parents and both catch up on sleep."
I've got to tell him, but I'm not sure how. Maybe I shouldn't say anything tonight and instead come up with plans to surprise him with the news in some memorable way. I could dress Julia in a Big Sister shirt and wait until Noah notices. Or take him to that restaurant we went to for my birthday long ago and tell him over dinner. I could even save this news for Christmas and wrap up a onesie as a present, if I can wait that long. But I can't, I realize. I don't want to wait at all.
"That sounds good, but this exhaustion isn't going away any time soon."
"I know, but it's only a few more months until you're done, right? You said your committee was confident you could defend in May."
"Even then I'm still going to be tired. And this summer we'll both be sleep deprived."
Noah gives me a weird look. "What are you talking about?"
He's got no idea, and I'm loving his obliviousness.
"It's not school that's exhausting me, Noah. Well, not just. I've been falling asleep by nine every night this week. When was the last time I did that?"
Noah frowns, still confused, and then I can see the instant it hits him. And witnessing his realization hits me, too—that flash of understanding in his eyes, the way his face goes slack for a second before lighting up, and then as big a grin as I've ever seen on him—and my eyes well with tears. Yeah, the ridiculous weepiness is definitely back.
"You're pregnant?" Noah doesn't sound like he quite believes it.
All I can do is nod.
"You're sure?"
"I haven't taken a test yet, but I'm pretty damn sure."
"Wow."
Noah's quiet after that single word drops, his gaze unfocused. And he's right, that's really all that needs to be said right now. I pull him down so I can curl up against him, and that's when I notice I'm not the only one with extremely damp eyes.
"Do you need a minute to collect yourself? Maybe some tissues?" I tease Noah, and that snaps him out of his daze. In an instant he's pulled me on top of him, wrapping me in his arms as he kisses me.
"This is very excellent news," Noah informs me. "Very, very excellent."
"Yeah, I thought so too," I grin back.
"When?"
"I don't know exactly. My period never came back after I went off the pill, so I'm not sure how far along I am. Maybe July, or August? I didn't think it would happen this quickly."
"Well, we are very good at this." Noah's expression is entirely too smug for someone only responsible for the easy part of this endeavor.
"You're going to be unbearably male about this, aren't you?"
"Getting you pregnant is basically the malest thing I can do. So yeah."
"I'm starting to understand all those insects where the female eats the male after mating."
"I'm not worried."
The smirk has only gotten more smug, but before I can retaliate by announcing I'm naming this baby Lee Noah's expression turns earnest instead.
"How are you feeling?"
"Fine. Just tired, but now that makes sense. And maybe a little terrified that we're actually doing this. But in a good way. How are you feeling?"
"I'm not the main concern here," Noah points out. "But terrified in a good way sounds about right."
A memory of being alone and terrified in an awful way suddenly bubbles up, and for a few seconds a wave of sadness threatens to overtake me. But then I look into Noah's eyes, his arms tight around me and his entire face alight with joy, and it's impossible to forget how different everything is this time.
I tuck my head under Noah's chin, burying my face in the curve of his shoulder. He smells of clean cotton and the soap I refuse to ever let him switch brands of, and I'm glad my crazy pregnancy nose has no objections to this most familiar of scents. We've got so much to talk about and celebrate and plan for, but none of that needs to happen tonight. Words aren't necessary to share this moment; it's enough just to hold each other and know.
Christmas Preparations
"The chain is on backwards."
"No, it's not. Just give me a minute."
"I'm telling you, it's backwards. It's supposed to go over that, and then under —" Lee tries to grab at the chain, but Noah swats his hand away. At this rate, Julia will have outgrown her new bike before these idiots finish assembling it.
"Exactly how many bikes have you built before?"
"Exactly how many degrees in engineering do you have?"
"You studied electrical engineering, Lee. Do you see a lot of circuit chips in this bike?"
"Right, because your Econ major is definitely more helpful here."
"No, because I've built bikes before."
"Whatever. Motorcycles don't have chains." Lee argues.
"Both of you, be quiet," I finally interject, my patience gone. "The chain's not backward, —"
"See?" Noah glares at Lee.
"When I said BE QUIET, I meant both of you," I warn Noah. "The chain isn't backwards, but you've got the pedal crank arms swapped. That's why the chain ring isn't sitting right."
Lee looks unconvinced, but Noah takes a closer look at the tiny purple bike before groaning and grabbing a wrench.
"What's that, Noah? I'm pretty sure that had to be thank you, genius wife you just muttered, but weirdly, it didn't sound like that."
"That's because he said —" Lee's last words are muffled by the clamping of Noah's hand over his mouth.
"Yes, Elle, you were right," Noah sighs exasperatedly. "Maybe instead of critiquing from the couch you could actually help?"
"Nah. I like this arrangement better. But if you need a break, you could go make me more hot chocolate," I tease him.
"You really are even bossier when you're —" Noah stops himself even before I shoot him a threatening look. Luckily, Lee doesn't seem to have noticed, and Noah answers my glare with a sly grin.
This is at least the third time since we've gotten to LA that one of us has nearly spilled the beans. The plan is to tell everyone tomorrow night, over Christmas eve dinner, but I'm not sure we can make it that long. Then again, sometimes I'm tempted not to tell anyone yet, to keep the pregnancy a thrilling secret shared only with Noah for just a little longer. We didn't get to do this last time, to dream and plan and celebrate this news just between us. But I'm also dying to tell Julia, not to mention Lee, and neither of them can keep a secret. She gets a pass because she's five and Lee, well, at this point I've given up on him mastering rule number two. So, we'll just tell the whole family at once.
"Do you actually want another hot chocolate, or are you just making demands for fun?" Noah asks.
"Do I ever joke about chocolate?"
"Fine. But don't complain to me when you can't fall asleep after all that sugar."
"You don't usually complain about me not wanting to sleep."
Noah laughs just as Lee slaps his hands over his ears. "Elle. We've discussed this. If you're going to be gross, you have to get a room."
"There's a five year old asleep in my room."
"Which is why I suggested we stay at a hotel," Noah mutters.
"It's Christmas. I'm not waking up in a hotel room on Christmas when I could be at Dad's. Anyway, next year we can stay at our own place."
"So you've decided? You're definitely moving back to LA?" Lee sounds a little disappointed. He keeps trying to convince us to join him in Seattle after I finish my PhD, but I've known for a long time that I want to come home.
"It's too rainy in Seattle. Besides, you can't hold out against your mom forever, so why not just give in now and move home too?"
"I have friends in Seattle. A really great job. An apartment with an amazing view. A girlfriend."
"You're still dating what's-her-face?" Noah says with skepticism.
"Emma. She has a name." Lee glares.
"You put her dead last on your list of reasons to stay in Seattle. I don't think I need to learn her name."
"Play nice, Noah," I warn. "Plus, he even introduced us to this one. Maybe she'll last."
It's not that I love Emma, it's that I hate the ex Lee hooks up with after every breakup. Which is another reason I want him to move back to LA, so I can more effectively intervene in his love life. Sometimes I'd like to go back in time and see the look on sixteen year old Lee's face when I inform him he turns out to be the playboy and Noah the soccer dad. He'd probably be thrilled, at least until I mentioned my role in that outcome.
"Aaaaand now we're done with this round of Smug Married People condescension. You two are worse than Mom, you know?"
"Julia wants cousins and I want a sister in law I don't hate."
"I'm still never going to listen to your dating advice."
"Because you're doing so well on your own?" He's really not, for the record.
"Because you'recompletely unqualified. Both of you. Normal people don't get married in high school."
"Neither did we!" I protest.
"You might as well have," Lee says dismissively. "Besides, how many times did I have to rescue you two? Unqualified."
"Ugh, fine. But come back to LA anyway."
"Maybe one day."
Christmas Eve
"More wine, Elle?" Mike asks.
"No thanks, I've had enough." In truth, the only reason my glass isn't still full is that Noah swapped it for his part way through dinner. No one seems to have noticed, but they'll know why I'm not drinking soon enough anyway—we're planning to share the news tonight.
Christmas dinner with the Flynns is my favorite of our holiday gatherings. Unlike Thanksgiving when every year June's guest list grows longer, Christmas eve has always been just our two families. It's Dad's turn to host this year, which means it's my old room Noah just carried Julia to bed in after she fell asleep at the table. Normally she'd be upset about missing dessert, but she knows it will be Christmas when she wakes up and not even June's pecan pie can compete with that.
"What'd I miss?" Noah asks, sitting back down at the table.
"Your mom just got done interrogating Brad about Izzy, so it's going to be Lee's turn again."
Izzy is Brad's girlfriend, a concept that will never not be disturbing because Brad will never not be my baby brother, even now that he's in college.
"This isn't fair," Lee complains. "Why is it always me and Brad getting the third degree and never you guys?"
"Because I already married Mom's favorite and provided a grandchild," Noah shrugs.
"Yeah, well, do me a favor and have another one to get Mom off my case."
"Okay."
I nearly choke on the water I'd just sipped at Noah's reply and Lee's reaction. There's no reaction from our parents, though, so they must not have caught the exchange.
"Wait, what?"
"That favor you just asked for. Merry Christmas." Noah has many smirks, but this one is the most obnoxious of them all.
"Elle? Are you actually knocked up or is my jackass brother just being a jackass?" Lee gapes. At least he's got the presence of mind to whisper it, because this wasn't quite how I planned to announce the news to everyone else.
"Both. But we agreed you'd never call it that again."
"Yeah, sorry, it's been a while. And I'm experiencing shock. Holy shit. Does Mom know?"
"Do I know what?" June asks. So much for our parents not noticing our conversation.
Lee pales as June awaits an answer.
"Nothing? I, um—your Christmas present. I was asking Elle what she got you," Lee stammers unconvincingly. "Which I can't tell you, obviously. Because it's a surprise."
June arches a skeptical eyebrow at Lee before turning her gaze to me. Suddenly I'm at a loss for words, especially after noticing that Dad and Mike have also tuned in to the conversation. We'd been planning to tell everyone tonight anyway, but being caught off-guard has left me tongue-tied, and the best response I can come up with is to kick Noah's leg under the table and give him a pleading look.
"This is my job now?" Noah laughs.
I nod sheepishly. Besides, he's the one who told Lee in the middle of dinner without warning me, so this is his fault. In so many ways.
"Alright then. We were going to tell you after dinner, but since Lee still has zero subtlety and Elle's apparently run out of words for the first time ever... Julia's getting a sibling next summer."
Dad gets that crinkly-eyed smile I love, June yelps before leaping from her seat to wrap me in a tight hug, Matthew laughs at June's reaction, and Brad pumps his fist before holding a palm out to Lee. If I find out those two had a bet going... But I don't have time to think about that right now, because through all the commotion my eyes have stayed fixed on Noah and the way his entire face lights up every time we say it out loud. No matter how crazy our life gets—and this next year promises to be a wild one, between graduating and moving and adding a whole new person to the family—one thing never changes: we're even crazier about each other. And with that, everything else is simple.
A/N : This epilogue was originally going to be a Christmas update... better late than never! Now that this is wrapped up, nothing can distract me from The Favor. Except maybe that itch to write an AU of my own story that I can't get over... More details one day. Probably. Hopefully.