Disclaimer: I own nothing

Izuku, Dabi, and Giran were all in Giran's living room. Izuku being in a living room isn't lost on him by the way. It occurs to him pretty much every time he's in one. Anyway they were just hanging out. They were all a little drunk and they'd managed to slip into a comfortable silence.

"Hey kind of a weird thought." starts Giran.

Uh oh.

"But pretty much as soon as I found out who he was and what he did, I wanted to kick Sigmund Freud's ass." says Giran.

"Man what the fuck?" asks Izuku.

"So you don't wanna do it?" asks Giran.

Izuku sighs, "Course I fuckin' do."

"I second that." says Dabi, "That dudes gross."

They all kinda humm in agreement. Before falling back into a brief silence.

"Yall wanna ask each other funny invasive questions?" asks Dabi.

"Fuck sure." says Izuku.

"Why not?" replies Giran.

"Embarrassing story, right now." says Dabi.

"Oh jeez lemme think." says Izuku.

"Yeah, Imma need a minute on that one… actually no. No I'm not." says Giran, "So this was way way back. I was young and my joints didn't hurt like a bitch."

"Preach brother." says Dabi.

"So I'm in highschool right." says Giran.

"Damn this shit happened in the 1800s?" asks Izuku.

"Fuck you. So I'm talking to this girl right." says Giran.

"Get it G." says Dabi.

"I was talking to her for like half a year maybe more. I didn't have the confidence I have now so I wasn't really making moves. Well I end up talking to a mutual friend. My buddies are hanging out together. So I'm talking to the mutual friend. I don't remember how exactly it was so long ago. But I ended up admitting that I liked the girl." says Giran.

"Oh shit. Did the mutual rat you out?" asks Izuku.

Giran sighs, "It's worse."

"It's worse!" parrots Izuku in shock.

"Man. All the months we'd been talking she never bothered to mention her girlfriend." says Giran.

Izuku and Dabi burst out laughing at Giran. Giran chuckles with them. In hindsight it was pretty funny.

"Oh man. I can't believe you spent all that time chasing a lesbian." says Izuku, "That's gotta hurt."

"Like a mother." says Giran, "It was pretty funny though. All my friends were laughing at me."

Izuku and Dabi start laughing again. It takes them a couple minutes to settle down.

"You got anything for us kid?" asks Giran.

"Fuck I'm still thinking." says Izuku.

"It's cool. I've got one." says Dabi.

"Hella." says Izuku.

"So this was back a ways. Before I was a villain. I still had a home and a family and all that shit. I was pretty young but my childhood blurs together so I can't really give you a time frame, just young." says Dabi.

"Is there a bathroom between now and the story?" asks Izuku.

"I'm getting there, damn." says Dabi, " So I'd gotten into the habit of parroting shit back at people. Like if someone called me stupid or ugly I'd go 'No you're stupid' or 'No you're ugly'. But I was doing it for everything. Well one day I'm hanging out with my siblings. Doing something. My mom comes in with hot chocolate and gives us some."

"I used to love hot chocolate." laments Izuku.

"So she gives it to us and she says, 'be careful it's kinda hot' and I go, 'no you're kinda hot… wait a minute, wait a minute, I didn't mean it like that'." says Dabi.

Like halfway through the sentence Izuku started dying laughing. He fell off the couch and was rolling on the floor. He was crying. Giran was laughing too but it wasn't as hard.

"Sigmund Freud's really coming through on that one." says Izuku between peals of laughter.

Now it was Giran's turn to start rolling. Dabi couldn't help but laugh with them. He was still embarrassed though.

After rolling on the floor for what had to be five minutes Izuku and Giran were back in their seats. Izuku was rubbing the tears out from under his eyes.

"Alright. You've been laughing at us long enough." says Giran, "Let's hear yours."

"Fuck man. I didn't have friends at all growing up. I really didn't have a stage to embarrass myself on." says Izuku.

"That's too damn bad." says Dabi, "Think of something."

"Shit. Okay. Uhm." says Izuku, "Does getting my ass beat in front of the whole school count?"

"No. You still do that and it's not that embarrassing." says Dabi.

Izuku sighs, " There was this one time where someone grabbed one of my journals and read all my shit in front of the class. Or the time I got punched in the stomach and threw up on the principal's new shoes. Maybe the time my aunt showed up at school and yelled at all the other kids for picking on me. Just to name a few."

Dabi and Giran just stare at him. They glance between each other. Dabi starts laughing. His hand reaches to where he's pulling his staples.

"You were such a loser." says Dabi while laughing uncontrollably.

Izuku laughs with him. Giran joins soon after.

"This one time I was tied to the top of the school's flagpole and we needed the fire department to get me down." says Izuku.

Dabi's rolling on the floor.

"Another time I got tripped and went down an entire flight of stairs." says Izuku.

Dabi's fucking howling at this point.

"This other time I got jumped by a couple students and they took my wallet." says Izuku chuckling.

Dabi makes a face at that one.

"Ooh ohh. This guy told me to dive off the roof once." says Izuku.

Dabi just stops laughing at that one. In hindsight those last two weren't that funny.

"That's kinda sad." says Dabi.

"It wasn't that bad." says Izuku.

Well shit the moments ruined. The silence is uncomfortable. Bummer.

"One time I had to explain what a milf is to my aunt because all the students called her one." says Izuku.

Moments back.

Authors Note

I'm gonna save the actual comment responses for the actual next chapter. I just wanted to write this. This one was super fun. It was really fun because Dabi's and Giran's stories were actually just mine. They kinda sucked in the moment but they're hilarious so I thought I'd share them.