The Fate of the First Hero of Light
In a majestic courtroom in a godland someplace, somewhere.
"GEIR THE HUME!"
"Watch how you speak to me. It is Great Father Geir or Warchief choose one."
"WHAT DID YOU SAY!?"
"Do you lack ears? It is difficult for me to discern with you shiny faces."
"OI! GEIR ENOUGH! DO NOT MAKE MATTERS WORSE!" says the god of chaos Loki.
"Be quiet Loki! Why do I have to help you!"
"Please Geir, you are the only person I know that does not want me dead!"
"WHAT DID YOU SAY! OF COURSE I WANT YOU DEAD! PREFERABLY BY MY OWN HANDS!"
"Even the little Hume does not want to..."
Geir pulls his hand out of his chest. A liquid similar to molten silver is pouring out of the large hole.
"WHY YOU!" the god reaches to grab him.
His frozen forearms fall and shatter on the floor, they disappear into nothingness. The silver liquid is pouring out from his arms stumps and his chest. His heavenly glow is starting to fade.
"I told you, watch how you talk to me."
"YAY! The Warchief is so brutal! YAY!"
Says the woman standing at the table where Geir and the chaos god are seated.
It is a tall woman she has fair skin and braided blonde hair. She is wearing a large headdress made from coloured feathers and wearing traditional clothing that barely covers her pleasing body's shape.
She is the other Dwarven Realm's world's fertility goddess Quetzacoatl.
Geir walks back to his table climbing over the broken bars he bent while moving to assault the god Koalemos.
"GEIR YOU ARE MAKING THINGS WORSE!"
"WHY DO I HAVE TO HELP YOU?"
"Please Geir you're my only hope." Loki's evil face shows a sad frown for the first time in his evil existence.
Geir puts his hand to his head.
"Very well what is the matter Loki?"
"Well you see..."
The god whispers to Geir.
"UNBELIEVABLE! CAN YOU NOT STOOP ANY LOWER!"
"Geir please..."
The other gods start laughing loudly, they are mocking him.
Loki slumps on the table. He wishes in his heart that someone could save him.
"LOKI!"
"GEIR?!"
"I CANNOT BELIEVE IT! Why did you only take the Mjolnir hammer, legends say the Gjallarhorn is there as well! What of all the gold!"
"GEIR THIS IS NOT HELPING!"
"BE QUIET LOKI! How am I suppose to respect you when you cannot even rob someone correctly. There were so many options! We could have hidden the treasures in the Dwarven Realm. The gold and other treasures I could have sold and laundered the monies!"
"Geir I..."
"Do not worry Loki everyone makes mistakes! Next time you want to seize the heaven's treasures contact me first."
"..."
"YAY! Geir is the best! YAY!" says the feathered goddess.
The other gods are dumbstruck at hearing this.
"Firstly Loki where are we?"
"You are in the hallowed halls of Asgard!" says a mighty voice.
"WHAT DID YOU SAY!"
"You are in the hallowed halls of Asgard!" says a mighty voice again.
"Change of plans! Loki and Coatl come here!"
"YAY! Anything for you Geir! YAY!" says Quetzalcoatl she is staring dreamily at the Warchief.
"We are still busy with a trial!"
"My client and I are discussing our defense strategy! Please be patient." Geir whispers.
"NO, NO, NO, GEIR! THIS WILL BE THE END OF ME!"
"YAY! I cannot wait. YAY!"
"Loki trust me everything will work out!"
"GEIR PLEASE NO HELP ME!"
"Do not worry. I will only ask for more assistance."
"THERE WILL BE NO MORE MORTALS ALLOWED IN THESE HALLOWED GROUNDS!"
"Not even Zeldany the Kind, the ruler of Hyrule?"
"Who is this Zeldany?"
Another god approaches the more important god, he explains.
"WHY MUST SHE COME?"
"Surely one as pure of heart as her, would be able to discern truth from false more easily."
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN!"
"You all hate Loki this is not a fair trial. Zeldany will be here to judge if you are not being biased against my client."
"I SEE, HAVING LOKI KILLED, THEN BEING ACCUSED OF COWARDLY PLOTTING AGAINST HIM AFTERWARDS, WILL DISHONOUR US. I AGREE WHAT OF YOU OTHER GODS?"
Everyone agrees.
Zelda is transported to the heavens.
"WHAT? WHERE AM I?" says Zelda she is wearing her Royal nightwear.
"Zelda come over here!"
"GEIR WHAT HAVE YOU DONE THIS TIME?"
"Forget about all that nonsense."
"FORGET ABOUT ALL THAT...I give up just tell me what we are doing?"
They form a circle.
"Which Zelda are you?"
"What do you mean which Zelda am I?"
"Are you my times or the other Geir's times Zelda?"
"WHAT! Did nobody tell you?"
"No, tell me what?"
"That whole story was sorted out."
"SORTED OUT!"
"Yes, some other person came and explained that the time lines were merging again. Our twins and ourselves merged we have both our memories and experiences."
"WHAT?!"
"Yes, the Kingdom has returned to normal."
"WHAT ABOUT ME?"
"How should I know?"
"Oh, alright what of Sir Gerrick, Sir Bartel and Sir Renferd?"
"They are alive, we can talk about this later. What crime are we committing? I can smell gold and it is very close nearby."
"EVEN THE QUEEN HAS BEEN CORRUPTED BY YOU GEIR!"
"BE QUIET LOKI!"
"YAY! What must we do Geir? YAY!" says the excited goddess.
"Well Coatl we are going to rob Asgard."
"YAY! I love the Warchief YAY!" she closes her eyes she moves to kiss the Warchief.
He turns around to talk more closely with Zelda.
Quetzacoatl kisses the air.
"Geir there are only three of us, I can smell many much gold here." says Zelda.
Zelda is sniffing the air, like when a rabid beast smells it's prey.
"How much Zelda?"
"Geir I would say at least fifty Dwarfs worth of gold."
"I see...Coatl?"
"YAY?" her eyes sparkle.
"Can you find a way to the Dwarven Realm?"
"YAY! For you anything Geir! YAY!" she feels her pulse racing.
"Thank you, Loki now for your part of the plan."
"What must I do Geir?"
"You must..."
Loki turns pale.
"NO, PLEASE GEIR!"
"Loki I am serious it must be done!"
The party moves, they assemble behind their table.
Geir addresses them...
"Tor where are you?"
"IT IS THOR WARCHIEF." says a Mighty Muscular God, he has a Mighty Beard and an even Mightier Mustache.
"Forgive me Great Father Thor."
"GREAT FATHER!? YOU DARE INSULT HIM OUR LEADER!"
"BE QUIET FOOLS!" speaks the Mighty God.
"..."
"WARCHIEF DO YOU KNOW OF ME?"
"I have studied your tales since when I was a newly adopted Dwarf."
"A DWARF YOU SAY HMMMMMMM...I SEE!" the Mighty God furrows his Mighty Brows.
"MNESTIS!"
"YES, THOR?!" screams a lesser mighty god.
"INCREASE SECURITY! ESPECIALLY AROUND AREAS WITH HIGH GOLD DENSITY!"
"AT ONCE!"
"DEIMOS FOLLOW THEIR PARTY ALWAYS! ESPECIALLY LOOK AT THE WARCHIEF HE MIGHT SEIZE GOLD WITHOUT EVEN KNOWING IT!"
"YES, MY KING!" screams another even less mightier god.
"No, I cannot agree to that. We have two fair maidens in our party. I will not allow them to be studied in great detail."
"HMMMMMMMMM I SEE THAT SEEMS REASONABLE. DEIMOS INCREASE SECURITY EVEN MORE TIGHTER AROUND GOLD DENSE AREAS!" the Mighty god's Mighty Brows are Furrowed even deeper he is studying Geir very closely.
"YES, THOR!"
"WARCHIEF YOU HAD WANTED TO SPEAK!" says the Mighty Furrowed Brow god.
"Yes, Great Father Thor, Loki wants to apologize."
"BAHAHAHAHA! HE WOULD NEVER DO SUCH A THING!"
"Even the impossible can happen sometimes! Loki come here!"
"Geir please no!"
"Is it just me or is it so hot in here? I think I should take off my parka! Everyone here should see my right arm!"
Geir moves to unbutton his bloody parka.
"FATHER I APOLOGIZE FOR THE TROUBLE I HAVE CAUSED YOU! PLEASE FORGIVE ME!"
"LOKI I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO SAY? EVEN THOUGH I KNOW THE GOD OF SCHEMES HAS MANIPULATED YOU SOMEHOW, BUT TO HEAR THOSE WORDS! IN MY HEART I FORGIVE YOU MY SON! STILL YOU WILL FACE YOUR PUNISHMENT!"
Loki is looking downwards, he is crying very hard, his tears are falling on the tiles.
"Father is it really true? That you forgave me?"
"YES, MY SON IT IS. NOW TELL US WHAT THE EVIL GOD OF SCHEMES HAS PLANNED!"
"FATHER IT IS THE GOLD AND TREASURES! WE MUST ACT!" screams Loki he looks very concerned.
"THE ACURSED DWARFS OUR ETERNAL ENEMIES! SEIZE THE WARCHIEF AND HIS PARTY!"
"My King these are only ice statues!"
"SOUND THE BATTLE HORNS! WE FIGHT FOR THE HONOUR OF ASGARD!"
There is a massive circular metal door it has ancient symbols on it.
"Coatl how does it look can you open it?"
"YAY! Geir freeze the door! YAY!" her heart is beating very fast.
Geir freezes the door.
The fertility goddess takes her wooden sword and with great strength shatters the door into small shards.
"Zelda now!"
"Holey Moley!" a round mirror is formed in the air. Dwarfs with battle armour exit and run into the treasury room. Each of them grips in their mighty arms a precise amount of stolen goods.
Zelda has a notepad.
"1,000,000 rupees." two Dwarfs pass "2,000,000 rupees." the cycle continues.
Another place...
"LOKI MY SON! HERE TAKE THIS WARHAMMER! TODAY WE FIGHT SIDE BY SIDE ONCE MORE!"
"YES, FATHER! HE TOLD ME HE WOULD STRIKE THE LIBRARY FIRST!"
"THE ROOM OF TEXTS! THERE ARE NO TREASURES HIDDEN THERE!"
"HE WILL SELL ANYTHING! EVEN THE TILES ON THE FLOOR! WE MUST STOP HIM!"
"YES."
They move towards the library.
It has been emptied.
"HE TOLD ME HE WOULD.."
"LOKI FORGET ABOUT THAT MY SON. WE MUST SAVE THAT WHICH IS MOST PRECIOUS!"
"FATHER THE ARMOURY!"
Loki and Thor run towards the armoury. While running they see Dwarfs seizing the possessions in Asgard's halls. The Dwarfs are running into round mirrors that are formed in the air. When they move to attack them, the mirrors disappear and the Dwarfs are gone.
They enter the hallway.
"NO, IT CANNOT BE!"
The massive door leading to the armoury, lays broken and shattered on the floor.
Thor wants to fall to his knees, the thought at losing his Warhammer being too much.
Loki braces him.
"FATHER STAND STRONG!" Thor's heart recovers he nods.
They gain speed and enter the room.
They see the god of schemes, he almost has his filthy evil hands on the Warhammer Mjolnir.
"GEIR YOU WILL NOT TAKE THAT!" screams Loki.
"You cannot stop me Loki!" the evil man smirks.
"WARCHIEF RETURN MY HAMMER!"
"You snoozeth, you loozeth Great Father Thor!" Geir goes to grab the Warhammer but slips and falls on the polished tiles.
The Warhammer still rests on its pedestal unmolested.
"GODDAMMIT!" Geir struggles to stands up.
Loki and his Mighty father move to defeat the evil god of schemes.
Reliving scenes of battles times past..
Before they can reach him, he jumps through the mirror, it is closed behind him.
"LOKI!" "FATHER!" They are so overjoyed they rejoice and embrace.
Eons have passed...
Thor stands before the mighty Titans this is the battle that will decide it all.
He stands ready he has his unbreakable War Shield and wearing the Battle Suit bestowed upon him by the Holy Quartet.
The first Titan moves to attack.
"FEEL THE WRATH OF ASGARD!" Thor swings his Warhammer like he, has never had. It breaks into pieces on the Titan's head. He looks at it. IT IS MADE OF WOOD! It is not even metal! It is just painted silver!
Before the Titans overwhelm him.
He screams.
"CURSE YOU GEIR!"
Eons present...
Geir is running towards the castle.
He is running up the stairs.
There are screams.
He unsheathes his broadsword and moves to kick the doors open.
The door is already open he slips and falls awkwardly on his back.
"ZELDA!"
"Geir!"
"What is the emergency?"
"Please help me! The royal throne room door company wont stop hounding us!"
""Hounding" you Zelda?"
"Yes, Geir since we have gotten the unbreakable doorstop Mjolnir. Door destructions by forceful Geir-entry's has dropped 100 percent. They do not want to except that!"
"That does seem to be a problem. I negotiated a very good deal on throne room doors, we will have to go to court to escape the contract."
"Can it be done Geir?"
"Do not worry I will resolve the matter. Still Zelda I had wanted to use it as a table weight to keep my parchments collected, that you could see its true function, I am very impressed."
Zelda's face is immediately red.
"REALLY GEIR!"
"Yes, Zelda if there is no further emergency, I am leaving, I will contact the door company."
"Thank you Geir!"
Geir leaves.
"Your Highness are you sure this object will not be missed?"
"YES, YOUR MAJESTY DOES IT NOT HOLD GREAT IMPORTANCE?"
"Sir Izdryn, Sir Hunfrey do not worry, a weapon shaped this crudely surely has no value or importance."
Finish.