We had arranged to start learning sign language this week. It was most awkward timing, considering that communicating is especially fraught right now.
Thankfully we are just studying the basics, finger spelling and some easy vocabulary so far. Bella is very expressive but is making lots of mistakes, which is to be expected as she lacks my perfect recall. For me the challenge is definitely in making questions, where I must engage my face as well as hands to form the phrase.
There is so much eye contact required. Before Bella raised her suspicions about my psychic abilities I would have been so enchanted to spend hours gazing into her face and having her look into mine. Now I feel very exposed.
It is obvious she is frustrated and feels confused about the situation between us. Her distress pains me greatly.
After practice today she signed 'take care' and looked at me with doe eyes. I nearly broke down on the spot and confessed everything.
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