Chapter 92
The Voice from Outside
The Dalek scanned the forest looking for a target, the hate that emanated from it was like a radiator. Which would've been a useful thing to know earlier when Raven was trying to detect it in the life filled forest. Trees, plants and animals didn't know the meaning of hate. If they couldn't eat it, have sex with it, or if it wasn't a threat to them then they weren't interested in it. Oh well, if she and Ace got out of this alive then maybe that nugget of information might be useful.
The Dalek suddenly turned and spotted something as Raven popped her head up from the undergrowth. A lance of blue went straight through her torso and the image vanished in a puff of darkness. It hadn't been the real Raven but just an image projected by Raven herself as a decoy. In that moment Ace had snatched up the fallen nitro-can and now they huddled close together.
"Nice trick." Ace said, giving Raven a thumbs up.
"I hope it was worth it, I don't think it'll work again." Raven commented.
"I don't know. Daleks are so eager to kill and have so much energy in their batteries they'll shoot anything that looks vaguely like its alive, even if it has no life reading." Ace said. Raven wasn't so sure of that. If it was intelligent surely it'd come to the conclusion that the distraction were masking the real individuals doing something.
"Right, ready?" Ace asked Raven, who nodded at her.
Ace leapt up and tossed the Nitro-can at the Dalek at the same time Raven launched a boulder at the Dalek from the ground. But the Dalek was quick. One shot blasted the boulder to bits, a second shot hit the nitro-can. The resulting explosion was so large the blast forced Raven first onto her feet and then onto her back. Her ears were ringing badly from the explosion. Ace had been blasted backward into a tree.
As Raven composed herself and the ringing in her ears settled she realised the Dalek had been blasted near the edge of the exhaust port. Raven struck. Vines and tall weeds, shrouded in black energy, raced out and wrapped themselves around the Dalek. It didn't scream, but it struggled as it was pulled into the forest. A tree nearby the Dalek opened up and the vines forced the metal menace into the heart of it.
Sadly, this didn't contain it. The Dalek fired randomly at everything in its bid for freedom. The creature must have some defence for its shell, because the tree burst into flames as the Dalek forced itself free. Raven then picked up another boulder and tossed it at the Dalek. The machine fired, and instantly was on guard as the vines crept up on it and its lance like beam cut down all the assaulting vines.
Waving her hands, Raven projected an image of herself running away. The Dalek turned and fired. The image, again vanished in a puff of darkness.
The eye stalked scanned around warily now, but in the lush jungle it couldn't pick the two girls out from all the other life in the area, but it was wary of an attack.
Raising her hand, Raven forced the ground beneath the Dalek to rise up, forcing it off its base and onto its back. Before it could get up the ground began to open up around it.
"MOTION IMPAIRED!" The Dalek screamed, though it had bigger problems as the ground swallowed it up like it was in quick sand. Raven was cautious, and she was right to be, the Dalek wasn't dead yet. Its eye stalk sprouted from the ground struggling. Slowly, the Dalek began to rise back up out of the ground like a rising zombie. It's gun emerged and fired out of pure frustration.
"If we can just knock out its eye stalk it'll be helpless." Ace said. "But without any more nitro we'd have to get near the thing."
Raven's eyes narrowed as she thought. Waving her hands she projected an image of herself popping up from behind a bush and ducking back down. The Dalek swivelled its eye stalk and gun, but did not fire. Another image of Raven running across its field of view. It tracked the image, but again, did not fire.
"Looks like it's wised up to your illusion." Ace said.
Raven did it once more, except it was an image of Raven running at the Dalek. The machine looked threatened, at first, but when it realised it was an illusion and not a real thing it instead spun its dome around looking for the presumed real attack that was about to befall it. Just to give it something Raven picked up a nearby rock and the Dalek blasted it.
"Do you have anything to smash that eyestalk?" Raven asked.
"Well, there is this." Ace went into her bag and from it she produced a baseball bat. It looked old and had clearly seen many uses. "I call it Daak, my Dalek killer."
Raven didn't look impressed.
"The Professor gave it a boost. Stings like hell." Ace said. Raven reached out and grabbed it a little too firmly. She had to stop herself from yelping out as electric sparks flew from its head.
"If you wanted it, you just had to ask for it." Ace said as Raven sucked on her numb finger tips. The teen girl took the handle of the bat from Ace. It was quite heavy, but she could hold it.
"When I give the signal, run around the back of it." Raven said, and moved herself into position.
"You got a plan?" Ace asked, "Mind letting me in on it?"
"Yeah, run like hell." Raven said back. "And try not to get shot."
"Boy, like being the mystery girl, don't you?" Ace snorted.
"Indeed." Raven said, glancing back at Ace.
"What?" Ace asked indignantly.
"Just wait for the signal." Raven said, hiding the bat under her cloak. She waited for the opportune moment as the Dalek rose further and further out of the dirt. She waited for it to look in her direction, then Raven struck.
The demon girl zoomed out, her cloaked and hooded shape levitating like a ghost and coming right at the Dalek head on like a bullet. The Dalek scanned her, but Raven cast a new illusion. This time she wasn't the illusion, but the Daleks read out of her was. Meaning it didn't fire upon her, believing her to be fake, however it did swivel its dome to look for the real attack. It spotted Ace running in the opposite direction. The Daleks entire mid section rotated to take aim. Raven was upon the Dalek swishing past it. From under her cloak Raven hefted the large baseball bat above her head and slammed it down on top of the Daleks' eye stalk. It screamed at the surprise. A beam fired from its gun, but Raven's attack had caused it to go wide, missing Ace by inches.
"MY VISION IS IMPARED, I CANNOT SEE! MY VISION IS IMPARED, I CANNOT SEE!" It screamed into the air.
It turned its gun arm to point in Raven's direction and it fired. It missed since it couldn't detect her visually, but it was using other cues and sensors to find her. Taking a few steps back Raven raised the bat again and brought it down on the gun attachment. The egg-whisk like thing shattered into bits. Raven then leaned back as the Daleks sucker arm came up, but she wasn't quick enough to get out of the way. The sucker arm clamped over her face and it felt like it was trying to suck her face off. Raven dropped the bat and held onto the sucker arm trying to pull it off herself, but it would not yield. Worst still, Raven couldn't speak her chimes, meaning she was helpless. Her temples began to ache, it was like her skull was being crushed under the pressure, and the Dalek only sucked harder and harder. Despite not being able to speak Raven tried to scream into the Dalek's sucker, the pain was so bad.
Suddenly Raven's struggles seemed to yield fruit as after a blinding flash she could pull away from the Dalek, despite its sucker arm still being stuck over her mouth and nose. Wires trailed out from the Dalek casing from where its manipulator arm had once been attached. It had been snapped after one swipe from Aces bat, which was hefted back up by its owner.
Raven again tried in vain to pull the sucker off herself, her lungs were burning for breath. Ace took the other end of the arm and pulled on some of the cables snaking from it and Raven found her face released and she took down great lungful's of air.
Fresh air, it's so underrated! Her brain said.
"ALERT, ALERT, VISION IMPARED, WEAPON IMPARED, MANIPULATOR IMPARED, MOTION IMPARED!" The Dalek screamed. It screamed that last one when Raven used her powers to tip it backwards allowing Ace to attack its underside, destroying its motor and hover function. Raven then set the Dalek back on its base and with a flick of her hand the ground opened up and the Dalek disappeared down into the undulating soil. It screamed all the way down and when the soil stopped still the screaming halted. Buried alive, too deep to even notice and Raven knew it was still screaming beneath their feet.
"Hey, wicked plan." Ace gave her a thumbs up again. "You got it used to seeing illusions as harmless, then pretended to be one yourself?" Ace laughed, "Devious little git aren't you?"
"I'll take that as a complement." Raven said without showing a hint of pride or emotion in victory. But frankly, inside she was buzzing. She looked down at the ground again. All the people it had killed, the scary hell it had put the villagers through. Now it was going to endure a hell under the soil for the rest of eternity, buried so deep where not even the other Daleks could find it. Despite being genetically engineered it still hated being buried alive, and with no chance of rescue.
Raven didn't even feel a little sorry for it.
"EXTERMINATE, EXTERIMINATE!" They barely got a chance to breathe when that chant echoed up from the exhaust port.
"It sounds like a bunch of them!" Ace exclaimed, "I'm out of nitro, we have to fall back."
Raven looked at the deep dark hole. "No." She said firmly, and shut her eyes. She'd fought to hard to let victory be snatched away.
"You what? Unless you can pull off some Master Yoda level voodoo we need to run."
Raven's eyes opened, now glowing brightly as she levitated off of the ground. This was taking a whole hell of a lot of concentration to pull off, but it was her best chance. The small girl reached out with both hands and imagined herself cupping a large object.
The ground around Ace began to shake and crumble as it buckled. She ran for it and leapt off the massive mound of Earth which had been pulled from the ground. Dust and loose soil crumbled from it and rained down beneath it. Underneath were the exposed roots and tangled vines. Other roots snapped off as Raven pulled as hard as she could with her mind.
The mass of Daleks was on their way up, but because of the way their gun attachments were placed they couldn't fire directly upwards. Which suited Raven fine. She hovered into the middle of the exhaust port, her head starting to ache from the concentration. With as much force as she could muster she slammed her arms down and the large mound of Earth fell. The roots underneath helped it to keep its shape as the exhaust port was sealed over. She then brought an arm back and forced it forward, sending a shock wave down onto the mound of earth in the hopes of bashing it down like a tight fitting plug. She did the same with the other arm, then alternated between them like she was patting it down.
Raven only stopped when she was satisfied the new hill she'd created wasn't going anywhere. Only then did she allow herself to drop to the ground. She landed with little grace, and sharply banged her knee against something solid. But her mind felt so numb from the effort that she didn't register the pain, at first. Then she gritted her teeth with it.
Ace ran up to her, but had been too late to catch Raven.
"Huh? Funny. I always thought size mattered not." Ace said. Raven sighed.
"You watch too much TV." Raven said back to her. The teen got up, but she was going to be hobbling for a bit, and she didn't have the concentration to levitate, or even to heal her own injury. She was too drained.
Ace offered her shoulder to pull Raven along. But the teen refused to accept it. Instead she called the Dalek sucker arm to her and used it as a makeshift crutch.
"It'll take the Daleks forever to clear that." Ace said, "By that time Safe Harbour should be alerted. That's if Hedgehog managed to send a message."
"Or the Daleks haven't exterminated him." Raven commented.
"Try to show a little optimism." Ace said sighing at her.
"Who said I'm not?" Raven said under her breath.
She was supposed to be meditating, but young Raven didn't want to. What was the point? Meditation was stupid, meditation was boring, meditation didn't make her feel better. It didn't even work. Not with a smouldering ball of resentment in her gut.
She was finding herself reliving her bad memories again, and again, and again wondering what she could've done differently. Frankly, in the past she just wished she'd been more aggressive and assertive. People left her alone if she was aggressive, if she snapped, so what if they run to mummy and complain? What are they going to do to her? What could they prove?
Why was she banned from the telekenetic-combat arena? What the hell did she do, except beat a bunch of losers into the ground? It's because I'm a girl, and I beat up a bunch of prissy boys!
The most powerful combatant in the arena is another girl. Her mind reminded her.
Shut it, why can't I enjoy a bad mood without reason and logic to spoil it?! Raven could beat every single one of those monks so very easily. It was just because she was too good at the sport, she trended on their fragile little egos!
You broke someone's arm and their leg.
I... I didn't mean to... I... I mean... I mean they were just weak!
It was against the rules. Raven held her head in her hands as her mind duelled with itself. One half thought, I hope he's okay, I didn't know my attack would be so heavy, to also thinking. How dare they ban me for such a small thing!
She was just tired of being treated like she was 'the other,' like she was some bad guy who needed to be fought and ridiculed, as far as she was concerned she was fighting back, but to those who saw her as a bad guy already, she was showing her 'true colours'. She just couldn't win, so she'll settle for feeling better while losing.
A kid had tried to annoy Raven today, call her 'Raving Raven' again, and mocked her because a zit had grown in the corner of her mouth, an unfortunate side effect of puberty. They probably thought she'd do something tame to them for such an insult. Use telekinetics to give the kid a wedgie, or pull their trousers down, or something like that. Instead her revenge was more subtle.
She didn't know how she could do this, but she briefly jumped into their minds and influenced their subconscious to have nightmares of some of the most awful things. H. P. Lovecraft had nothing on Raven's nasty imagination. The kid would wake up every night with nightmares of horrid things coming to get him, and the best part of all is that no one could ever blame Raven for the crime.
That's not all she could do while in someone's mind. She could influence fears, create prejudices, set people against each other, implant memories. Though that last one was difficult to pull off as the victim tended to reject the memories when they didn't 'feel real,' if that made sense.
Some might say the punishment didn't fit the crime. To the early teenage Raven it was entirely justified. She just wanted to be left alone, and if it took a shotgun in the face to get people to leave her alone then that is the tactic she'll use.
Glancing in the mirror while combing her hair Raven spotted a slender woman in the mirror behind her. She'd sensed the woman come in and she didn't like the way the woman looked at her with obvious fake concern.
"What do you want, mom?" Raven snapped.
"Are you feeling okay?" She asked, "You didn't show up to Azar's lesson today." Raven sighed heavily.
"I had..." she had actually forgotten, but to say that would seem weak, "I had better things to do."
"Really?"
"Yeah, really!" Raven fired back. The woman stood there for a good few moments again before speaking.
"Raven, I wish you'd talk to me. It breaks my heart to see you this way." She said.
"Breaks your heart?" Raven said levelly and sardonically.
"You've been becoming more distant. You won't even talk to me anymore." She said.
"That's because I have nothing to say to you." Raven was angry, and the more her mother tried to talk to her the angrier she got.
"I understand what you're going through." Mother said.
"Don't pretend like you understand me." Raven hissed to the image in the mirror. It came closer to her. Raven's eyes were locked with hers, no way was Raven blinking first. "I don't care what you think of me." Raven's soul had twinged as she'd said that.
"I just want to help you."
"I don't need any of your help." Raven said, then she let out a long sigh from her nose and pretended like she was breathing fire, "You've never been proud of me."
"I beg your pardon?"
"You've never been proud of me!" Raven insisted, "You're ashamed of me!"
"Now, you know that is not true." Her mother said soothingly, "I've always stood by you, even to my own detriment." Mother had lost friends. She even had enemies, some apparently just because she had birthed Raven, the others were friends who became enemies because she'd stand up for her daughter.
"And who's fault is that?" Raven said back acidically.
"I'm not disappointed in you. I am just concerned for you." Mother said. "For your future."
"Liar!" Raven said in a low voice.
"I am very proud of your telekinetic abilities, they surpass mine and half the people in the temple." Mother said, "But it's your attitude and behaviour I'm concerned about."
"So you're ashamed of me."
"No!" Mother insisted.
"Why should I 'get better,' why should I be 'good?' Why? When they won't let me be good? What is the point of being good if everyone treats you like garbage? Why be good if everyone looks for a way to call it evil? What's the point of being good?" Raven felt like she was breathing fire at her mothers reflection in the mirror.
"If you aim to do good for want of a reward, then you do not understand goodness."
"Oh, shut up. I don't want much in life. All I want is to be left alone!" Raven's face darkened in a threatening manner. Unfortunately the zit on her face made it look rather comical. Raven was going to scrub her skin raw to prevent any more zits showing up again.
"But we can't be alone forever, no person can be an island."
"Don't patronise me. I know you're ashamed of me. You despise me like all the others. I'm not Raven Roth, I am not an individual, I'm a bad guy, I am a literal demon! You hate me, you fear me, and you know your life would be so much better if I'd never been born. Tell me I'm wrong!" Raven leaned towards the mirror leering, challenging the woman.
Mother came up to Raven and placed a hand firmly on her shoulder. "I have never regretted having you, and no one will convince me otherwise." She said tenderly. "I don't hate, nor fear you. I love you, Raven."
Liar! Raven's mind shouted.
For a brief moment Raven felt wretched for what she'd said, just for a second, then the hormones kicked back in. Raven reached up, took her mothers hand and forced her to let go of her shoulder. She matched her stare again. "I..." She was going to say, "I don't believe you." But instead she said, "I don't need, nor do I want your love. It is pointless and useless to me." Love wouldn't protect her from the torment, it wouldn't protect her from judgement, it wouldn't give her respect, and it wouldn't make anyone see her as a human being. The silence that followed was cold. "I don't want your love." Raven said again.
You mean you don't deserve it. Said her mind.
Shut it!
Raven rose from her seat, and turned to walk out of their shared dwelling.
"I still offer it." Mother said, "You will always find love under my roof."
Raven looked back at her mother and stared her straight in the eye. "Mom."
"Yes?" There was a pause before Raven spoke again.
"Who is my father?" The expression on mothers face just made Raven more annoyed. Why wouldn't she just tell her? When she got no good response Raven decided a different tactic. "Mom. Is the demon Trigon my father?" The look on mothers face was very telling. Raven's eyes narrowed. "Then it's all your fault."
Raven left the room and stamped out into the open to be outside, away from that woman. In any other circumstances Raven's rational mind would've kicked in and made her calm down. As it was, her hormones overrode everything. Her powers were on the loose and as she walked wall mounted torches were either blown out, or their metal was twisted into horrific shapes that resembled something out of a Lovecraftian horror. Raven didn't care, she was angry, and her anger had every desire to express itself.
Soon she was surrounded by darkness, darkness and assorted books in her secret place. She couldn't read without light, but the dark was comforting. The prospect of nothing was comforting to her. Darkness, stillness, nothing. The grinding engines of the universe had stopped as long as she remained as still as possible and produced no noise she could pretend she did not, and never did, exist.
She was in an old cabinet in a storage room for old junk that wasn't in use anymore. This cabinet had been dumbed there to be forgotten about long ago, which is what she wanted, she just wanted to be forgotten about.
Her psychic senses suddenly came to life. Someone was in here, and it was like they had just appeared from nowhere. Raven tried to be as quiet as possible, she didn't want attention right now, any attention. But she did admit she was curious about this new-comer, so she just waited and listened.
They walked around and yet made very little noise, unlike the usual Azarathian footwear which tended to make a small but noticeable clacking as the person walked on the solid floor. At first she thought the person was floating, but no, whoever it was just wore very soft shoes, yet they weren't sneaking around but moving freely.
Her thigh was becoming numb and so she moved a little to aid with blood flow, as she did she knocked into one of the book piles and it fell over in the cabinet.
"Shit!" She said out loud, then clamped her hands over her mouth to stop any further utterance, and she waited.
"Is someone there?" Said a soft spoken voice with an English accent.
Go away, go away! Raven insisted, sending out psychic waves with the suggestion implanted. But the person, the man came closer.
"Subliminal psychic projection?" He muttered to himself. "I won't hurt you, are you alright?" He reached out for the cabinet handle.
"Don't open the door!" She insisted in a snarl.
"Oh, alright." He took a step back.
"Open the door and I'll kill you!" Raven said.
"I had no intention to if that is your request." Okay, that was not a response she expected. "Isn't it rather dark and cramped in there?" He asked.
"It's large enough for me." Raven said back.
"Oh, isn't that my life." He muttered to himself. He was silent for a brief second. "What are you doing? Is it a game of hide and seek?"
"Go away!"
"Or maybe you're hiding from your troubles." He said in a caring voice that Raven did not buy. "I used to do that a lot, where I come from. When I was small, and fresh out of the looms."
"Don't try to connect with me, you have no idea who or what I am."
"Oh, and who might I be addressing. Miss?" The man asked.
"I'm a monster." Raven growled, "I'm the bad guy."
"Well then, Miss Monster." He spoke in a tone which made light of that self identification. Raven's eyes narrowed and she cocked her head to one side, curious. She couldn't help but feel charmed by that joke. "You know your problems don't go away if you run and hide from them."
"I mean it." Raven said again, "I'm bad, I'm horrible, and I'm evil, and I want to do the most horrific things to people." It was true, she wanted to hurt and kill and hate.
"Oh... But you don't want to?" Raven ground her teeth a little.
"I... I don't know..."
"Please, don't. Just don't." He said. Then he sighed, came up to the cabinet and patted it, despite the box getting the attention Raven knew it was for her, and the effect was no less soothing. "I know it can be hard, going through your teenage years. But things will get better, people grow up, usually. Take my word for it. We've all done bad things, said horrid things to our parents, done things we can't take back... Let friends down." He said the last part with genuine hurt.
"Friends are pointless." Raven said.
"Friends enhance life." He sighed, "But the life I lead always seems to put them in danger." His voice sounded distant. "I wonder if I should just travel alone, I feel like I'm such a danger to everyone."
Raven's eyes narrowed again at that, it had struck a chord with her.
"Alone is better, alone is peaceful." Raven said. "Alone is uncomplicated."
"Yes, yes it is. Peace and solitude." He sounded distant again. "But alone is also very lonely." Despite her desire to be horrid Raven couldn't help but feel sorry for this man, he was an adult, but didn't act like the usual adult. In her heart she felt a spark of sympathy for him. Then she had an image of this guy being shunned by the Monks of Azarath. She didn't want that for him.
"If you don't want them to turn against you, you better not be caught talking to me." Raven said. "Especially not in such a kind way."
"Oh, why?"
"Because I'm the 'bad guy.' Haven't you been listening?!" Raven ground her teeth. "I am bad, I was born bad, I feel I am made to do bad things. I am to become evil."
"Really? Fascinating." The man said, "because I've travelled about a bit and I've never met a single person who was actually born evil to start with. They became that way afterwards due to environment." Raven didn't know what to say to that, but it made her suspicious. This could be a trap. Lead Raven out, then attack her. It had happened before and she'd gotten wise to it. So perhaps they talked a stranger into doing it for them.
"Oh don't worry. I judge people based on their overall character, rather than gossip or hearsay." He said, "and I especially won't adopt a view purely for some groups approval. If I'd wanted that I'd never have ran away from home." He paused as if he'd said too much. "But that's a long story."
"I'm not coming out!" Raven said, baring her teeth even though the guy would never see the expression. But it carried in her voice.
"I'm not asking you to. You're clearly comfortable in there." He said.
"I am evil." Raven insisted, "I am becoming wicked, cruel, horrible and uncaring."
"So you keep saying. Well have you tried to be good? You'd be surprised as to the effects." He suggested. Raven didn't speak at first, but she liked to think he could sense her seething in this cabinet.
"Don't you think I haven't tried?" Raven exploded, she curled up further into the cabinet. "I tried to help a little boy grab a book from the top shelf. He ran away from me, and everyone said I was stealing it from him. I stopped a kid being bullied, they ran away and said I was bullying them, all of them, even the kid thought I was coming for him. A statue falls over and nearly crushes someone, I project a shield to protect that person, and they all scream at me like I was the one who toppled the statue in the first place, to vandalise it, all to hurt their little feelings! No matter what I do, people always spin it. What's the point in being good, if no one will let me be good?"
Silence as the man allowed her to calm down from her rant. "That's propaganda for you." He said sardonically, then he thought a little more. "Do you want to be evil? Deep down?" No one had ever asked her that before.
"N... no." Raven said, "but I don't want to be 'good' either. It sounds mushy."
"Sometimes, 'good' is just an image people wear over their true selves." The man said. "Sometimes 'good,' 'morals,' 'justice,' and so on enables someone to be horrible with authority."
"Yes..." Raven said, "That's them." Raven felt so relieved someone understood, and was more amazed someone could put those feelings into words to be communicated. "But don't try to defend me in front of them. They can be cruel. Just leave well alone."
"Interesting. You call yourself a monster, yet you care for my wellbeing?" He laughed.
"I don't care about your wellbeing!" Raven insisted, "I just... I just... I just don't need you to defend me. I am strong enough to defend myself."
"Yes, clearly." He said. "So you don't want me to defend you? To improve your image?"
Raven curled up, bringing her legs up to her chest, crossing her arms over them, and resting her head on her arms. "No." Was all she said. Somehow she could sense that the man was pleased on some level. Probably relieved that he didn't need to put his own image in danger.
"I don't have a good image with these Monks either, I doubt they'd listen. But I could try to..."
"No." Raven said again. Then she gently ground her teeth. "Why? Why won't they let me be good?"
The man sighed, "Some people need bad guys."
"Why?"
"The same way they need a God or a religion. To make sense of a complicated world."
"I make the world simpler for them?" Raven asked.
"In a way, yes. Some need bad guys because they are desperately concerned about the future. Then some charismatic man marches in and tells them it's all the fault of this person, or that person, or this group of people. They believe it to be the case, group think takes over, and they go after them."
"And kill them?"
"Or shun them?"
"Why shun? If they're so bad, why not kill?"
"Laws of the land? There are some rules some people aren't interested in breaking." The man said, "Some people need bad guys, because its the only way they can demonstrate to the world that they are a good person."
"They lie about me, so people will believe a lie about themselves?" Raven asked.
"In a way." He said. Raven was holding back her next thought. It took some courage to utter it.
"I wish they'd get it over with and just kill me. At least then I will know peace." She said sadly to the voice.
"Now, nobody wants that."
"I imagine there would be celebrations. Cries of 'ding, dong, the wicked witch is dead.' No one will mourn me." Raven said swallowing.
"I would." The man said.
"You don't know me." Raven said back spitefully.
"I don't need to know you to mourn your passing." The man said. God, he was just not getting it.
"I am evil!" Raven insisted, the cabinet shook with her outburst. "I deserve to die!" She took the man in her powers and lifted him up off the ground. "Do you want to know how evil I am? I'll show you!" She imagined breaking his legs, his arm, his neck. Bending him over backwards. Raven moved her hands and held them like she was holding this man in her hands like a doll, one she was ready to break. She hesitated, just before the act.
She growled and dropped her powers allowing the man to land on the ground. Raven now felt close to tears, but she refused to let even one roll down her cheek.
"My mother hates me."
"Now, I'm sure your mother loves you." The man said.
"I've ruined her life." Raven banged the back of her head against the inside of the cabinet. "She stands up for me, makes excuses for me, and..."
"That proves how much she loves you." The man said, "an uncaring, unloving mother would throw you to the wolves. She stands by, and protects you despite everyone else. That does not show hate, it shows love."
"But I've ruined her life."
"She's allowing it to be ruined so she can stand up for you." The man said. "She's giving up so much for you, all for you."
Raven rested her head against the cabinets interior. She wanted her mom now, she wanted her mom so badly. But after how she'd behaved. How could she go back?
"A good parent will always be patient with their child. Trust me, I was a dad once, a long time ago."
"Dad..." Raven now realised that she wanted a father, to know her father. Her head turned to where the voice came from.
"Why are you even at the temple?" She suddenly asked with suspicion. It was rare Azarath got visitors.
"Me? Oh, I just needed a place of peace and tranquillity, and this place was nearer than the Eye of Orion. Plus, it gives me a chance to drop in on an old friend, and check up on an..." he paused, "on a decision I made." His voice became distant again, almost suspicious. "You never told me your name."
"You never told me yours."
"No, I didn't. Did I." He said, it sounded like this conversation was over. "Anyway, I still need to see that friend of mine, and I..."
"Please... stay." Raven asked of him. "It's just... I... I... I like you. "
"Would you like to come out of that cabinet? I feel a little silly talking to it." The man said.
"I prefer you as a disembodied voice. No offence." She said.
"None taken. Honestly, to most people my voice would be the most irritating thing to be left with."
"You are irritating, and confusing. But..." Raven didn't know what to say. He'd listened to her, he didn't judge her. And she didn't know what to say. "... I don't know." Raven felt silly for asking this next question, she later hated herself for asking it so meekly. "Will... will you be my friend?"
He rested a hand on the cabinet. "I'll try my best." He sounded unsure, but in a reassuring way that he'd never hurt her. "What else do you want to talk about?" He asked tenderly.
Whoever this disembodied voice belonged to he was so full of good advice, and he sounded so caring. They just talked and talked, and talked. It felt good to talk and not feel like you were being judged. She told him about the boy who's arm she broke while in combat, and how she had mixed feelings about it. He was wary, and a little scornful, but he acted like he was on her side, just not the side of her that didn't care that she'd injured someone. The storm and emotions in her mind were subsiding and she found herself gently falling asleep. She used some soft books nearby as a pillow. She didn't want to fall asleep, she wanted to continue talking to her friend.
"You're tired." The voice said.
"Yes." She yawned and wrapped herself in her cloak.
"You should sleep"
"Yes." She moved to get comfortable in the darkness. "Do..." she hesitated "Do you promise to still be here when I wake up?"
There was a hesitation before he spoke. "I won't be far from you."
The world faded as sleep took her over. She reached out to the mind of the person she'd talked to as a way of saying 'thank you for listening.' Strangely, she got an image of rolling country sides, lemonade on a summers day, and a scent that reminded her of celery.
Please come again soon...
She'd later been awoken some hours later by a horrible, pulsating screeching from outside the cabinet that faded away to silence again. Raven had stepped out to investigate and found nothing. Except close to the back of the storage room there was a curious square where something had once stood and put its weight down before being lifted off, presumably by telekenetics, since there were no drag marks. There had been a strange tang in the ether, like when someone passes through a curtain and the curtain continues to dance a while from the movement before it comes to a stop. That is what it felt like. Then the tang was gone.
When she'd returned to her dwelling to face her mother Raven didn't say anything. She didn't have to. Mother saw the look of utter guilt and regret on her young daughters face. The mother came forward and embraced the child, but Raven didn't hug her back, not because she didn't want to, but because she felt like she didn't deserve to feel comfortable. Not after what she'd said.
To Be Continued...
Authors notes: I decided for younger Raven to be a lot more hot headed at this point since she'll be going through puberty. But also to add a little perspective. After all, we are all the good guys in our own story and I thought it'd be interesting if some of that hatred and suspicion aimed at Raven wasn't entirely unjustified, but she just chooses to remember how she was unjustly treated.
I added in a bit where she was kicked out of the telekenetic combat club because I realised I'd made a continuity error earlier in the story where I'd said the Monks of Azarath had never trained Raven to defend herself. This way the Monks hadn't because they kicked her out, and the reason she didn't know how to fight the Shaydes way back in the first arc was because she only had experience combating other combatants similar to herself.
You can probably guess who Raven was talking to. In a way, it mirrors what will later happen to her when she speaks to Malchior and his disembodied voice from the spell book. Only in this case, the disembodied voice is someone she can and will trust. Which opens up why she might have acted a little naively towards the talking spell book later.