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Major arrived at Fillmore Graves to find out that his unit was being called out. Nowadays, he couldn't help feeling a chill every time that happened. Someday they were going to call him up and ask him to go someplace a human couldn't go—or he was going to have to decide whether it was better to be shot or stabbed and potentially killed, or unemployed again. Given that there was nothing much else in his life other than work, dying had seemed like a reasonable option so far.
But that was before Shawna. Three days of nonstop sex really had a way of turning a guy's outlook around, and he was whistling jauntily as he got dressed in the locker room, drawing catcalls and comments from the rest of his unit.
Let them laugh. None of them had a hot woman texting them all the things she wanted to do to their bodies when they were off work.
"Where are we going, anyway?" he asked Justin in the truck on the way over.
"Zombie truthers, I think. They're livestreaming some zombie they captured—we're going in to stop it."
They pulled up outside, taking formation. The glass of the door was shattered, as if someone had broken in. Friends of the captured zombie, maybe? Before Major could speculate further, two men, clearly truthers from their armament, burst out the door. They stopped short when they were faced with the bright lights of the trucks and the flashlights, blinking in confusion. For a moment, he thought they would surrender.
Chase Graves spoke loudly and firmly. "Put your weapons down and your hands up. This is your only warning."
The two men looked at each other, nodded, and made a break for it. They didn't get far.
Major hated to see it—he would have preferred to find a less lethal way to handle things, personally. But that wasn't Chase Graves' way, and Chase Graves was the boss, so he shot at the men right along with the rest of his unit.
"Lilywhite! Dennison! Collins! Inside!" Chase Graves called out. "Deal with whatever you find there."
So they went in, shouting loudly, wanting to make sure their approach wasn't a surprise. It looked like there had been fighting, and somehow Major wasn't too surprised to find a very familiar face looking up at him as he shone his light into a caged area in the back of the building. "Liv?"
"It's been a hell of a day," she told him. From the looks of things, she meant it. In the cage with her were Ravi, Blaine, and Don E, who was digging heartily into the brain of one of the truthers. "You mind telling your friends to quit pointing those guns at me?"
He lowered his own, smiling at her, glad to see her in one piece. "Men, stand down! They're with us."
Collins and Dennison looked at Liv and Blaine, and the blood smeared around Don E's mouth, and nodded crisply.
As he was checking the basement, he caught sight of his roommate, and remembered suddenly that Ravi was supposed to be in London. Meaning to get to the bottom of that particular confusion, he hurried after Ravi, calling his name.
Ravi looked stressed, and not just because of the bloody wound on his head. "There you are. Have you seen the girl?"
"Just Liv. Who are you looking for?"
"Rachel."
Major frowned. "Your zombie truther friend?"
"She escaped first, but I can't find her."
There hadn't been any sign of her—Major's unit had secured the perimeter, making sure that no civilians were around to take away zombie knowledge they didn't need to have. If they'd found Rachel, she'd have been held for questioning, and Major would have heard it on the radio by now. "Sorry, man."
Ravi sighed unhappily.
Major gestured to the wound on his head. "You should go get that checked out."
"It's nothing. I'm fine."
"Then you should go home, get some rest." Guiltily he remembered Fort Lust, which he hadn't even begun to clean up. It probably smelled like a combination of a brothel, a zoo, and a pizza place at the house. "It's kind of a mess, but I'll clean up after my shift."
"Right. Yeah." Ravi was looking around, distracted, and Major didn't think he'd heard a word.
"If anyone sees any sign of her, I'll let you know," he told his roommate, and moved past him into the basement, looking for anything they could use against the truthers, and confiscating whatever weaponry he found.
Later that night he let himself into the house. It was very quiet; he suspected Ravi was asleep. No point in cleaning up now, might just wake him up, Major decided. He went into the kitchen for some sustenance, and was just rinsing his dishes when he heard Ravi come downstairs.
He met his roommate at the bottom of the stairs with a beer.
Ravi looked at him in confusion, clearly not quite awake yet, and then looked across into the living room at Fort Lust in all its glory. "What you got going on there?"
It looked a bit less glorious now than it had when a naked beautiful woman had been stretched out in it, Major conceded. "That's a sex fort," he said baldly, not bothering to explain further. He handed Ravi the beer. "So … how was your London trip?"
Ravi rolled his eyes. "Witty. Harley made me call you with that excuse so no one would wonder why I didn't show up for work." He sank down into a seat at the table and jerked a thumb toward Fort Lust. "No, really, what, you had a slumber party?"
"Mm, more of a staycation. Remember Shawna? The girl who wrote me that sweet letter?"
"The big Chaos Killer fan girl? You didn't."
"Oh, but I did." Major grinned. "Several times." Ravi made a face, and Major grinned wider. "It's not just sex, though. No, I mean, it's mostly sex, but she has a lot of … other qualities, and I … I cannot wait to experience whatever those are, as well."
"I'm sure propriety and modesty are high on that list."
Major nodded. "All right, Carson. Just worry about Lady Mary." The bowl in the middle of the table was empty of snacks, and he was just getting up to get some more when the doorbell rang.
He expected it to be Liv, but instead it was Ravi's truther friend, Rachel. Major could hear them talking as they made their way toward the kitchen. He filled the snack bowl, grabbed some dip, and went out to join them. "Hey!" he said cheerily. "You must be Rachel. I'm—"
She was staring at him. If there was any doubt whether he needed the introduction, it was dashed when she turned to Ravi in shock. "Your roommate is the Chaos Killer."
Ravi, playing it cool like always, looked at Major like "what, him? Nah!"
But Rachel was having none of it. "I need to get out of here." And she was gone. Ravi tried to chase after her, but she wasn't waiting for any explanations.
"Chaos kidnapper, if you must know," Major muttered under his breath.
Ravi glared at him. "Thanks a lot."
"Sorry, dude. I didn't think you were in the clinches after the night you just had."
"Probably not. Still …"
"Yeah, I didn't think about how hard it must be for you to bring home girls when you live with such a notorious monster." Major sighed. Definitely time to do some healing sexting with Shawna.
