Thanks for still being with me through the tears. This chapter should be more joyful. As a reminder, I don't own any MCU characters, just my own OC's. I appreciate all of you following along, marking as a favorite, commenting, and reading. Thanks for brightening my little corner of the world!
To give Mikayla more time to herself, the group went to the shawarma diner to grab a bite to eat. Back in her room, Mikayla was trying to fight the self-pity that was coming over her. "Breathe, Fitzgerald, breathe. In, out, in, out, in, out. You've done it your whole life. It's not that hard. Focus on what you can control, and I can control how I'm reacting to the news. Remember, WWAPCD, what would Agent Phil Coulson do? Uncle Phil Coulson would probably do the same thing, which would be to tell me to get over myself, and he'd be right. If I give up, that means the bastard won, which I refuse to let happen. My eyesight is coming back, I'm awake from a coma and don't appear to have any lasting effects from that, and I can always wear hair extensions. I'm more scared about being paralyzed because I know if the surgery doesn't work, Tony will want to fix me. I don't want any robotic parts. Nothing against Bucky, but he had to replace a missing arm. In simple terms, my problem is that my brain isn't talking to my back and legs. I'll still be able to do my computer job, but archery on missions is out the window, even though I know Tony would try to make a flying wheelchair for me." Mikayla teared up, thinking about how much fun she had being out in the field on the mission, knowing that may not happen again. Her phone was next to her, so she picked it up and pressed track 101 on her playlist. Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons started playing, and she listened to the song. Soon, there was another voice adding itself to the mix.
Baby, when you're feelin' like you'll never see the morning light,
Come to me,
Baby, you'll see.
Who loves you, pretty baby?
Who's gonna help you through the night?
Who loves you, pretty mama?
Who's always there to make it right?
"You are." She lifted her head and saw Clint walk around and sit down on the edge of her bed. "Hey, beautiful."
"Still don't have those glasses yet, birdbrain."
"I keep telling you I don't need them to see what's right in front of me." Clint stroked her face. "Sounds like you're in a better frame of mind."
Mikayla nodded. "I channeled Uncle Phil, decided he wouldn't want me wallowing in self-pity. I'm not going to lie, though, Clint. I'm scared." She looked at him, her eyes becoming wet. "What happens if the surgery doesn't fix it? What will I do if I'm permanently like this?" She motioned down to her non-working legs. "I was just getting used to the idea of being in the field, and this has put a stop to it."
"Shhh," Clint put a finger over her lips to silence her. "You're going to get your mind all worked up again. Remember to focus and breathe." He held his finger to her mouth until her breathing slowed. "Good." He took her right hand. "Mikayla, whatever happens, we'll work through it together." Clint touched his forehead to Mikayla's. "I brought a friend." Mikayla looked to the foot of her bed. "Hi, Wanda."
"Hi, Mikayla. It's so good to hear your voice. I was – I was worried about you." Wanda looked down at her hands, and her fingers were beginning to turn a familiar orange-red color. "I was going to see if I could help you as I did at your farm, but it sounds like you don't need me."
Mikayla smiled. "I'll always need a friend." Mikayla used the bed controls to raise her head and allowed Clint to help her turn over, wincing when he put a hand on her back. She nodded at him to tell him she was okay. "I'm glad you're here," Mikayla said to Wanda once she got settled. Clint pushed the call button to alert the nurse about Mikayla's pain.
Wanda sat down in the chair next to the bed. "I'm so glad you're back. I've missed you."
Mikayla patted her hand. "I've missed this, being able to talk to my friends and family." The nurse came into the room. "Can I help you? I didn't call you."
"I did," Clint said. "Would you look at her back? It's bothering her."
"Clint," Mikayla said through gritted teeth."
"Babe, trust me, it'll be easier if you accept the pain meds."
"Fine," Mikayla sighed in resignation, "I'm too tired to argue."
The nurse turned Mikayla onto her side and glanced at her back. "It's healing nicely, but combined with the fractures, it will probably be painful for a while. I'll get you some mild pain relief. A good compromise?" She nodded. "OK, I'll be right back." The nurse left and returned shortly, giving Mikayla some medicine through her IV. "You should feel some relief soon." The nurse left the trio to talk.
Later, there was a knock at the door. The trio turned their heads to find Nat, Maria, and Pepper. "We were having a girl chat, and we're missing a couple. No, Clint, you're omitted."
"Funny, Nat." Clint smiled and looked at Mikayla. "I'll let you have your girl time. Be back later." He kissed her and strolled out the door, barely limping.
Pepper came up and hugged Mikayla. "I love the hair. It'll be easier to take care of, so that's a positive. Before you say anything, I've got a stylist lined up to visit you after your surgery. The doctors here aren't known for their fashion sense."
"And, while you've been sleeping on the job," Natasha quipped, "we've been talking wedding attire. We were telling Maria what you and I wore at Pepper's wedding, so we thought we could wear something like that for yours."
Mikayla thought about it for a bit. "That's a great idea. Silver goes with everything, so each of you can pick whatever color skirt you'd like. See," she looked at Maria, "I told you I was thinking practical."
"I wouldn't expect any less from a Coulson," Maria smiled. "It's good to see you awake. Nick will never admit it, but he was scared."
"He's a big softie. Of course, he'll never say anything," Mikayla said, still wondering how she got to this point in her life, then yawned. "Damn Barton. He swore I needed pain pills, so now I'm tired. I've been sleeping for two weeks. Do I need to sleep?"
"Take it from me," Nat said, "you do." She looked over at Wanda. I can give you a ride back."
"That would be nice. Thanks, Natasha." Wanda leaned in and gently hugged Mikayla. "Please call me if there's anything I can do."
Mikayla started tearing up. "You've already done it just by being here, all of you." She sniffed. "OK, that's it, I'm getting sappy, and Clint's nowhere in sight. Time for you to go." She smiled. "Thanks for stopping by, and I'll be sure to add the dresses to the list of decisions I don't have to make." The women left, and Clint returned a short time later. "Hey, come here." She patted the edge of the bed. "Thanks for being patient with me. I know I was a whiny bitch earlier, and I'm sorry."
"No worries, babe. You had a lot of info thrown at you, plus your body's gone through a lot of changes. Remember, I love you just the way you are."
Mikayla groaned. "Billy Joel again? Be sure to put his songs on the list for the reception." She yawned again.
"Get some sleep. I'll be right here waiting for you."
"Enough with the song lyrics, RH."
"Hey, I caught you when you fell, didn't I?"
"Time after time, you always will." Mikayla smiled, held his hand, and fell asleep.
A couple of hours later, Clint watched Mikayla sleep when her eyes flew open, and she squeezed his hand. "No, make it stop! You son of a bitch! Damn it, that hurts!" She started screaming as if in pain.
Clint immediately shook her. "Mikayla, it's me."
"Clint? Clint? What am I supposed to do?" She started screaming in pain again.
He put his mouth to her ear. "Sharky, it's RH. Barney's not here. He's gone." Clint started rubbing her temples and continued whispering to her until her breathing slowed to a normal pace, and she stopped screaming.
Mikayla eventually woke up and looked over at him. "Clint? Hold me? I close my eyes, and I see him. I don't want to see him. I only want to see you. Get him out of my head."
"Shhh, I've got you, and I'm not letting go." Clint stroked her face and ran his hand up and down her arm. "I'm right here."
"Sing to me, Clint, even if it's Mary Had a Little Lamb, I don't care." Clint leaned down to her ear and softly sang to her as she fell back asleep. He allowed himself to drift off once he was sure she was sleeping but would wake up whenever he felt her tense up or heard her breathing increase. Her nightmares kept her up most of the night, but Clint, true to his word, was right there with her, helping her through them.
When the team showed up in the morning, they found both Clint and Mikayla asleep. "Should we tell him he's drooling?" Sam asked. A pen flew across the room, landing in the wall inches from Sam's head. "Guess not."
"Good decision." Clint sat up, stretching out his neck and back.
"How is she?" Bruce asked.
"Nightmares most of the night, think she's finally asleep."
"I'd probably still be asleep if people didn't decide to have a convention in my room," Mikayla mumbled.
"Oh, good, she's back," Natasha joked. "The sappiness will be next."
Dr. Sullivan appeared behind them. "Can another doctor get in on this party?" The group laughed as he made his way through them and approached Mikayla. "It's good to see you awake. How are you feeling since yesterday?"
She blinked a few times and yawned. "Vision's a lot better. My back is still sore from the beating, and my head is getting used to having less hair weighing it down." She shot a look to Clint that threatened him within an inch of his life if he mentioned anything about the nightmares.
Dr. Sullivan smiled. "Those are good signs. We'd like to go ahead and schedule the back surgery for later this morning. It's a minimally invasive surgery." He explained the procedure. "These are normally done outpatient if that tells you anything. Providing all goes well, and the rest of your body continues to heal, we'll be able to discharge you in two to three days. If you're okay with that, I'll have the nurse bring in the consent form." She nodded in agreement. "OK, I'll see you after the surgery. The surgeon is the best neurosurgeon in the country, so you'll be in good hands. I'll let him know." He nodded and left the room.
Mikayla put her head back against her pillow. "So, guess we'll know this afternoon about the paralysis."
"Remember, whatever happens, we'll deal with it together." Clint took her hand and kissed it. She nodded. "Now, everyone out of here. The patient needs her rest." After saying their greetings, the group left with plans to return for the surgery.
"Clint," Mikayla started to say, but he silenced her.
"You do need your rest, plus I'm not ready to share you yet. I want to be selfish a while longer. So, please, try and get some sleep."
"Yes, sir." She smiled and closed her eyes. Clint sat next to the bed and watched her sleep. He hoped it would be more peaceful than her overnight rest.
It wasn't. She didn't sleep. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw his brother or one of his cronies approaching her to mete out more torture. Mikayla didn't have the heart to tell Clint that Barney wasn't the only person who tortured her. When he would get tired, he would "reward" (Barney's term) one of his underlings an opportunity to slap her around or take a turn with the belt. She had never met anyone so evil and vindictive. It was still hard for her to believe Clint and Barney were brothers. She thought back to the day Clint found her in the barn. Barney had given Clint all the clues; after telling Mikayla, he made sure SHIELD would find Eric. She knew Barney considered Eric dispensable, and he didn't know enough to rat Barney out. "Here, let me give you a tour of the old homestead." He dragged Mikayla around by the ropes he had tied around her wrists, putting more pressure on her already broken ankle, further injured after losing the air cast back in California. "Here's where we slept, when our dad wasn't dragging us out of our beds to beat the shit out of us." He took her out to the barn. "I think it's only fitting it ends here, don't you? This is where your hawk learned to fly. We'd jump down from the loft onto the hay bales." Barney sneered at her. "Depending on when bird boy gets here, I may give you a shot, see how far you soar." Barney proceeded to drag her up the rickety ladder and tossed her against the barn wall. She guessed that's when her back was broken.
Clint didn't want to disturb her, but it broke his heart to watch her silently sobbing and trying not to cry out loud. He hoped he'd proven to her she could talk to him about anything. He knew she'd talk when she was ready. They'd take one crisis at a time. Before he knew it, the transporters arrived to take her down to surgery. "I'll see you in a few hours, Mikayla." He clasped her hand and kissed her. "I love you. If you're lost, you can look."
"And I will find you. Love you, too." Mikayla squeezed his hand. He walked behind the bed and met the team in the surgery waiting room. "See you in a few," Mikayla said to the team as she was rolled by on the way to the surgery suite.
Clint sat down between Nat and Misty. "Did she get any more rest?" Misty asked.
He shook his head. "No, and she just got to where she was mostly sleeping through the night. At least she'll get some rest with the anesthesia." Nat patted him on the knee, and Misty nodded.
A short time later, a tall, lanky doctor with dark hair and a goatee came out of the surgery room. "Fitzgerald family?" He asked in a haughty voice.
"Yes?" Clint stood.
"She's out of surgery." His voice was barely above a whisper, so Clint walked over and got the information. When the surgeon had presented his report, he spun on his heels and strolled back into the surgery suites.
Clint walked back to the team. "Surgery was a success. It looks like the brain is talking to her legs. Some of her toes reacted to stimuli, so the hope is when she wakes up, she'll gradually have full use of her legs."
The group released a collective sigh of relief. "When can we see her, Clint?" Wanda asked.
"She'll be back up in her room in a couple of hours. They suggested we go back upstairs to wait for her." Wanda nodded, and the group made their way back to the ICU waiting room.
Later that afternoon, Mikayla was wheeled back up to her hospital room. Clint waited until she was hooked back up to the monitors to go inside. The first thing he did was turn on her playlist. "Hey." He sat down next to her and took her hand.
Mikayla turned her head. "Hey." She gave him a small smile. "I got some sleep."
"Good, you needed it." Clint didn't want to ask the obvious question in case the surgery wasn't successful. "Team is out in the waiting room."
She was too scared to ask about how the surgery went, so she nodded. The couple sat in the room. The only sounds were the machines beeping and the music coming from her phone. After several minutes, Clint happened to look down toward the end of the bed and saw the sheet moving. He studied the movement and realized it was her foot keeping time with the music. A huge grin appeared on his face. "Why…smiling?"
Clint looked at her. "Other than the fact that my gorgeous, sexy fiancée is back, I noticed something. Listen to the song playing and look at the end of the bed." Mikayla took her eyes off Clint and looked. She looked back at Clint and grinned as Clint started singing.
There goes my baby,
She knows how to rock 'n roll.
She drives me crazy,
She gives me hot and cold fever,
Then she leaves me in a cold, cold sweat.
"They work," Mikayla said, now moving both feet to the beat of the music. "I'm not paralyzed."
"Exactly. Hold that thought." Clint kissed her forehead, then walked over to the door. "She's awake." Everyone hurried and crowded into the room around her bed. "Nat, if you'll hit the repeat button on her phone, please." Nat looked quizzically at him but did as he said. Once the song started playing, he pointed toward her feet. "Our question's been answered." The group looked and saw both of her feet keeping time. A small cheer went up, with everyone congratulating her. "She's not ready to go dancing yet but headed that way." He looked back at Mikayla, who had tears streaming down her face. Clint reached up and wiped her cheeks with his thumbs. "Welcome back, babe."
"Thanks." She yawned. "You all can stay and watch my feet move. I'm going to try and get some sleep." They knew she was still on pain meds, so as a group decided, they would filter back up later in the day. Everyone said their goodbyes, leaving Clint and Mikayla alone again in the room.