Harry and his Brainy Girls

By: Sheltie

I don't own Harry Potter at all

A/N: this is an exclusive chap to this series. Warning some Ron bashing.

Chapter 206: Alicia Spinnet

"SPINNET!"

Alicia had a wide grin on her face as she ran off. She knew her prank had gone off with great success given how loud her target was shouting. It served the bitch for calling her mother a good for nothing whore and her father a deadbeat drunk. Neither was true, but she thought she needed to pay the girl back for those comments. So she pranked her.

"On the run again Leesh?"

Alicia looked up and grinned, it was her good friend and sometimes partner in crime, Harry Potter.

"You know me Harry always making new friends" she said cheerfully.

"Given how loud Basset was shouting I'm sure you and her are good friends now" Harry said sarcastically.

"What can I say, I just have that kind of charm" Alicia said smirking.

Harry chuckled.

"So, the old water balloon catapult triggered by Basset opening the door?" he asked.

"It's a classic and you can never go wrong with a classic though I didn't use water" Alicia said.

"Oh, then what did you use?" Harry asked.

"Special paints and dyes. Nothing harmful mind you, but it's ruined her clothes for good and it'll take a while for it to get off her skin" Alicia said proudly.

"Nicely done Leesh" Harry said applauding her efforts.

"Thanks you, thank you, thank you" Alicia said grinning and bowing.

Alicia was found and was going to be punished, but they had no evidence. There were no witnesses who saw her setting up her prank. So they could only let her off with a warning. It irked the staff, but this was how it usually went when it came to Alicia and Harry. The two were master pranksters and were barely caught and if caught they didn't have sufficient evidence to fully punish them. Sure, they had most of the pieces, but not enough to punish since Harry and Alicia never left witnesses or any incriminating evidence behind.

"So, just a slap on the wrist?" Harry asked as he saw Alicia walk out of the principal's office.

"Yeah, same ol', same ol' shtick. Seriously, the guy's gotta get a new writer. He's sounding like one of those corny Saturday morning cartoon bad guys" Alicia said.

"Come on, I'll treat you with something for your victory" Harry said.

"Awesome" Alicia said smiling.

/Scene Break/

"You always want to go here, you know that" Harry commented.

The two were at a 50's style diner.

"I like the feel" Alicia said.

"Whatever, booth or table?" Harry asked.

"Booth" Alicia said.

Harry nodded and gestured her to lead.

"Glad to know you know your place" Alicia quipped.

Harry rolled his eyes as he followed her.

They took their seats and ordered.

"So what did Basset say to you this time that pissed you off?" Harry asked.

"She called my mom a whore and my dad a deadbeat drunk" Alicia said with some anger in her voice.

"Leesh, calm, calm. We both know that's donkey dung. Now Basset, well, not sure about her mom. But her old man is definitely a drunk" Harry said.

"Yeah, that's true" Alicia said.

"Great, now retract the claws" Harry said half joked.

Alicia rolled her eyes, but relaxed.

"You know, we haven't done a prank together in ages" she commented as she swirling a fry in a pool of ketchup.

"Are you asking for a collab?" Harry asked.

"Maybe" Alicia said coyly.

"Fine. If we're going to do this then it better be big" Harry said, "something that will mark are place in history."

"I like the way you think Potter" Alicia said with a grin.

So the two conspired over burgers and fries.

/Scene Break/

Their target was one Severus Snape. The most dour and unpleasant man ever to grace the school staff. The student body either disliked or hated the man. It was mainly his personality. As a teacher in general he knew his subject which was chemistry. He just wasn't good company really. The reason why he was picked was because he was like Teflon. He had some kind of uncanny sixth sense to sidestep any prank that targeted him.

When Alicia suggested Harry wasn't too sure.

"You wanted big and bold Harry. What could be bigger or bolder?" Alicia asked.

"Okay. I give you that, but this just makes it more complicated" Harry said.

"Then lets get started" Alicia said.

/Scene Break/

"So what do you have here that we can use?" Alicia asked.

She was in Harry's lab which was located in a shed in the backyard of the Potter house. His mom wouldn't allow him to have any chemicals in her house. Harry hadn't blown himself up, but his mom knew one of these days he would.

Harry was astounding in chemistry and though his grades didn't fully reflect that he was darn near genius. Snape didn't seem to like him much for this reason and something else.

"I might have something. Don't touch those" gesturing to some bottles. "Last one who did got a face full of fumes and passed out for like an hour" Harry said.

Alicia listened to Harry since he knew what he was talking about.

"Ah, here it is" Harry said as he pulled out a beaker filled with something. It was corked.

"And what is it?" Alicia asked.

"Well I accidentally made this. It causes gas" Harry said.

"Gas, that's it. Come on Harry, that's lame" Alicia said not impressed.

"In other words Leesh that whoever ingests this they'll be plagued with farting and burping" Harry explained.

"Oh, gas" Alicia said.

"Yes" Harry said.

"And how do you know this?" Alicia asked.

"It was tested though on accident" Harry said.

"Weasley?" Alicia asked.

"Yes. Ron was thirsty and grabbed the beaker when I wasn't looking" Harry said. "He farted and belched so much I had to have him leave since it was stinking up the place."

Alicia shook her head. She felt bad for Ron Weasley, she really did. The boy had a bunch of older brothers who are all very successful in their own right.

Bill, the eldest was working in some big security firm. Charlie, the second oldest was a veterinarian at some big zoo. Percy, the third oldest was working his way up in the government. And finally Fred and George the twins and fourth and fifth eldest of the family owned their own joke shop that was thriving. It didn't help matters that Ron's little sister was doing quite well in her classes burning up the charts.

But Alicia's sympathy could only go so far. Ron never put in any real full effort to do something about his lot in life. He just did the minimum required for classes to graduate if even that and showed envy and jealousy to those who strived further than he did.

How Ron and Harry became friends was still a mystery to Alicia.

"So we can use this?" Alicia asked.

"Yes. Just need to find a way to get it into his food without him knowing" Harry said.

"I think I know a guy" Alicia said with a grin.

/Scene Break/

Alicia did know a guy. It was a student who was usually tasked with lunch duty. The student didn't care for Snape and accepted as soon as the name was said. They didn't care if they got blamed. Just as long as Snape got pranked.

After finding their inside man it was then to figure how and when to do this. Staff didn't regularly eat in the cafeteria so that was out. But Snape did have a habit of eating there on the occasion of a certain meal being served. He always ate that. So with that information they knew when to strike.

/Scene Break/

"So we all set?" Harry asked.

"We are" Alicia said giving a thumbs up.

"Lets get this going" Harry said.

/Scene Break/

Snape grabbed his food and found a place in the crowded lunchroom. He didn't usually eat there, but he agreed to do so since he had to be on lunchroom watch anyway. So might as well have some of his favorite food while he had to watch the brats.

The first one was sudden and quick. It caused a quick hush. Then the second followed by several others.

Snape's glare was increasing as he tried to stop, but he couldn't, not from either end.

Soon laughter erupted as the dour chemistry teacher continuously expelled gas from two holes.

Snape rose from his seat and walked swiftly out of the lunchroom with a fart escaping with each step he took.

"Mission accomplished?" Harry asked.

"Mission accomplished" Alicia said with a wide grin.

They toasted with their milk cartons.

End

A/N: apologize for the short ending part. Thanks for reading and please review.