Thanks to holly for reviewing.

I am working on a few other stories, or trying to. As you can tell, my schedule lately is a bit crazy, and my motivation is also suffering a bit. I usually write ten chapters before posting, but all things considered, I'm aiming for a bit more to prevent myself from falling too far behind. I'll let you know if there's a new story out.

Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia.

TurkPort: Sitting in a Tree

"Why can't they just give it a rest?" Bulgaria sighed, as Hungary and Romania bickered nearby.

"Watch," Turkey said. "This is about to get fun."

Bulgaria frowned, but he watched Romania and Hungary. He had no idea what Turkey was referring to, and wondered if he should perhaps go and help his friend.

"Romania and Hungary, sitting in a tree," someone started to sing. "K-I-S-S-I-N-G!"

Bulgaria's eyes widened, and Hungary and Romania actually faltered, looking horrified. Bulgaria's eyes sought out the singer, and saw one of the micronations – Sealand, right? – pointing at Hungary and Romania while singing that song. And some of the other micronations started to join in.

Turkey chuckled, and a few other nations appeared amused by this as well. Romania and Hungary glared at each other one last time before taking their seats again and eating their lunch.

Bulgaria was still confused about it, but it had managed to get Hungary and Romania to stop fighting. And that was what he wanted. A few minutes later, Sealand bounced up to Turkey.

"How was that?" Sealand asked.

"You did great, kid," Turkey said, before removing a small packet from one of his pockets. "Here you go."

Sealand accepted the packet with a grin, before going back to his friends. Bulgaria whipped his head around and stared at Turkey.

"You didn't," Bulgaria said.

"It's pretty funny, right?" Turkey laughed.

Bulgaria shook his head, though he couldn't repress the smile blooming on his face.

"You know they're going to kill you for this, right?" Bulgaria asked.

"First they'll have to find out, and part of the bribe is that Sealand says nothing," Turkey said. "Second, they'd be too embarrassed to do anything about it."

"Are you sure about that?"

"Look at them. Do they look eager to find out what happened?"

Bulgaria sighed.

"As long as this only happens one time, I guess it shouldn't be a problem," Bulgaria said. "This is only a one-time thing, right?"

"Of course not!" Turkey exclaimed. "What's the point if this only happens one time?"

Bulgaria simply stared at Turkey with a blank expression.

"You are playing a dangerous game," Bulgaria said. "I hope you don't come to regret it."

"You worry too much," Turkey said.

…

Hungary was packing her things away after yet another meeting when she sensed someone behind her. She turned around and glared at the man behind her.

"What do you want?" Hungary asked. "Haven't you caused enough damage?"

For months now, whenever the two of them were arguing, someone, usually that British micronation, would start singing that K-I-S-S-I-N-G song. And what made it worse was the fact that other nations would join in to mock them. She suspected that it could perhaps be Romania trying to prank her, and that he made himself a victim as well in order to throw off suspicion.

"This is about the whole Sealand thing," Romania said. "This needs to stop."

"Are you going to go threaten a child?" Hungary asked. "So, it's not just a Halloween costume."

Romania scoffed, rolling his eyes. Obviously he recognised the insult for what it was.

"I heard something interesting from Moldova," Romania said. "He said that Sealand is always eating candy after he… sings that song."

"So?" Hungary asked. "What's so strange about a child eating candy?"

"The timing."

It took her a moment to properly process what he was saying.

"So, you think that someone might have been bribing him?" she asked.

"It's a possibility," Romania said. "So, do you want to find out who it is, or do you want to keep hearing that song?"

Hungary grimaced, before standing up.

"Do you have any idea where he is?" she asked.

"I know where he is," Romania scoffed. "Follow me."

Sealand turned out to be in the courtyard, snacking on a bag of candy. He turned to them and stared with that 'am I in trouble?' look.

"Sealand, we've got one question for you," Romania said. "Where'd you get the candy?"

"I'm not supposed to tell you," Sealand asked.

The way he said it… Hungary started to think that maybe Romania was right and that Sealand was being bribed.

"Sweetie, if you tell us, we'll give you three times as much candy," Hungary said, making her voice as sweet as possible.

Sealand's eyes bulged. Apparently, the prospect of more candy was an appealing one.

"It was Turkey," Sealand quickly said.

"Turkey?" Romania repeated, before he scowled. "Why, that dirty…"

"Sweetie, do you know where Turkey is right now?" Hungary asked.

"I saw him go that way," Sealand said, pointing in a certain direction.

"Let's get him," Hungary snarled, removing her frying pan.

As she and Romania stormed off, she could hear Sealand calling after them.

"Wait, what about my candy?"

They found Turkey a few minutes later, hidden in a corner. But he was not alone. He had his arms wrapped around someone and they were kissing. Hungary's eyes widened, and she was sure her nose was about to bleed. She quickly removed her cell phone, intent on taking a photo of the scene.

"Isn't that Portugal?" Romania asked.

Hungary's eyes widened further, and she was sure she was in heaven. She and Romania looked down when they heard Sealand stop behind them. Romania's eyes lit up, and Hungary had a feeling that this was a scheme that she would approve of.

"Remember that song?" Romania asked. "I'll give you ten times the amount of candy if you sing it for Turkey and Portugal."

Hungary snickered, readying her phone. This would be precious. Though a part of her felt a bit sorry for Portugal.

"Turkey and Portugal, sitting in a tree," Sealand sang. "K-I-S-S-I-N-G!"

The two sprang apart. Turkey was gaping at the scene, while Portugal looked as though he wanted to disappear.

"Call Sealand off, and this stays here," Romania said. "Did you get it?"

"Yep," Hungary affirmed. "Tell me, does Spain know you're making out with his brother?"

Turkey glared at them, while Portugal was obviously trying to shrink away.

The prompt is: 'Person A bribes Child A with candy if Child A sings the "K-I-S-S-I-N-G" rhyme whenever person B and C fight. This is embarrassing for B and C especially when others happen to chime in. This goes on for a few weeks until B and C bribe Child A with even more candy to tell them who did it. When they find out, the pair go on a hunt for A, and find Person A and Person D kissing. This leads to Child A singing the rhyme to them, with Persons B and C joining in.
Person A: Turkey
Child A: Maybe Sealand (of all the micro nations he or Wy would be the one to do it)
B and C: Romania and Hungary
D: Portugal'