Chapter 13

Word spread like wildfire throughout the cadet corp concerning the mission the Scouts had partaken in. It was the talk of the town, second only to the discovery of Eren's titan Shifting abilities.

"Did you here? They say a cadet killed a titan with his bare hands!"

"Come on you're gonna believe that hog wash? There's no way anyone can kill a titan without some kind of help."

"who did they say did it?"

"They say it was Calian Howlett."

"… Actually I kinda see that being true."

Many were surprised, none more so than his friends who've all grouped up together. Connie finally joins into the conversation.

"This can't be true can it? I mean sure Cal's a big guy and he's always been strong but taking down a titan without his ODM gear? That's impossible!"

Jean isn't convinced though, "It's gotta be true. You saw it yourself in Trost, he's different now."

"Oh come on horseface, you really think anyone could be strong enough to wrestle a titan on their own?"Ymir asks, laughing loudly.

Christa scolds her but she continues in her laughter.

Jean thinks for a moment, "Mikasa probably could."

Everyone has been witness to the inhuman feats of strength that Mikasa had demonstrated, from lifting things several times her own size to throwing Eren into a wall when he got a little too excited. "Yea but, I mean that's Mikasa, she's always been like that." Connie says.

"Why would he do that! That idiot!" Sasha exclaims, her hands trembling with worry.

The group gives her weird looks and Christa wears a face of concern as she tenderly places her hands on Sasha's, trying to calm her. "Are you ok Sasha?"

Potato Girl flinches slightly from the contact, "Huh?"

"You just called Calian an idiot."

"oh y-you heard that?"

Ymir stares at her as if she was stupid, "Uh yea, you weren't exactly quiet."

She flinches again, "Sorry. I don't know I guess-"

Connie bumps her shoulder, "hey we get it. We were all a little worried when we heard about that."

As they all share some words of comfort to Sasha, she pays them no mind. From the moment he had left to go on the mission, she had been a wreck. Her heart wouldn't stop pounding and her worry grew so much it felt like she was gonna get swallowed up by it. It got to the point she didn't even feel like eating, and that scared her even more! The worst part, was the empty feeling in her chest the moment she let him go. It was like a piece of her had been ripped out and she doesn't understand why. She doesn't understand why she missed him so much when it's barely been a day since she had seen him, why she missed his warmth and why she had this overwhelming urge to see him again to grab him and hold him and never let him go. To look into his grey eyes that swirl with so much emotion yet turn into the gentlest shade whenever she gazes into them.

"I think I know that look, you're smitten on him aren't you!" Ymir accuses, grinning wildly as she does so.

Sasha's eyes widen comically and her mouth dries, "uh uh whaaaaaa?!"

Christa smacks Ymir's arm, "Ymir!"

"She totally is! Just look at her, one day without the bear and she's already a wreck!"

"No nono! You got the wrong Idea I just miss him cause he- cuase – um uh!" Sasha's brain has completely malfunctioned as she has a tough time forming sentences.

Connie sees her struggle and quickly jumps to his best friends aid, "Hey lay off her, we were all worried about Cal!"

"Yea but not like potato girl, guess that's one piece of meat she definitely wants to sink her teeth in!"

She almost faints hearing that, squealing as she buries her face into her hands and runs away in embarrassment, Jean and Connie calling after her, their calls mixing with ymir's cackle and Christa's scolding. Sasha runs as far as she can and gets into the barracks, closing the door behind her and leaning against it as she slowly sinks to the ground, her face now buried into her knees. What was Ymir thinking!? How can she say that!? I mean, yea Cal is handsome and tall and and… so very muscular! She squeals again as she grips her head trying to will away the less than innocent thoughts that are plaguing her mind. Why is this happening?!

A soft knock hits the door, making Sasha jump. But she relaxes when she hears Christa's gentle voice, "Sasha? It's me Christa, don't worry Ymir isn't here it's just me. Can I come in?"

After a moment of hesitation, the door slowly cracks open and Sasha steps aside to allow the short blonde into the room. She quickly sticks her head out to make sure the coast is clear before closing the door behind her with a little too much force than necessary. Christa wears an apologetic expression as she apologizes on her friends behalf, "Sorry about what Ymir said, she went way too far on that one."

The red head sighs as she sits on the bed and pulls out a piece of bread she swiped when no one was looking. Even though she still didn't feel hungry, she started nibbling on it absentmindedly, finding comfort as the starchy sustenance hits her taste buds.

"Is it true?"

Sasha stops nibbling and looks at the blonde questioningly. Christa nervously fiddles with her jacket, "I don't mean to pry! But you just looked so troubled by it and if there's anything I can do to help—"

"it's ok Christa… I think I would like that."

Smiling elegantly, the blonde takes as eat next to Sasha and waits patiently for her friend to continue. "I-I don't know where to start, for a while I guess I've just been feeling- something whenever I think about Calian."

"What do you feel?"

Sasha blushes madly, she's never been good at feelings especially when it comes to talking about them. She was never closed off but the way Calian makes her feel… it's something she's never experienced before. "I don't know!" she grips her hair tightly as she stands up dramatically.

Christa tries to calm her, "ok ok, how about, how does he makes you feel?"

"I-I feel, safe and happy when he hugs me. Like nothing on earth can hurt me as long as his big arms are around me and as long as I can hear is heart playing it's beat in my ear. I feel so warm when he cooks something for me and he doesn't ever look annoyed, he's always smiling as sweet even when I get food in my hair."

The corners of Sasha's lips do an upturn the more she thinks about the cadet, her arms circling her waist as if reminding herself of his embrace. "He's the sweetest, kindest, and brave man I've ever met. And I don't know if I'm crazy but, whenever I felt so scared he would look at me like as if… as if I was the only thing that mattered."

She shakes her head, "And when he went on that mission, I felt so alone and so scared! I was losing my mind I couldn't even enjoy dinner and you know how much I love dinner! But' it's like nothing tasted good and and and-!"

She stops her frantic rant as her friends sweet giggle brightens the room. Christa smiles at Sasha. "You're in love Sasha."

A few moments of silence pass. "… WHAT?!" she screeches.

Christa flinches, her hands shooting to cover her ears and she swears the window shook slightly. "Love?! Who said anything about love!?"

"You did! Everything you just said shows that you're in love with Cal."

"No no way, you've got it all wrong!" Sasha tries to deny, despite a little voice in her head telling her that's it's anything but.

Christa gives her a look before smiling slightly, "Oh yea? Then tell me, how did you feel when Ymir told that little story about Calian streaking?"

Stammering Sasha tries to answer, "I-I guess I didn't… like… it? But but it's not because he was seen by anyone, I mean it was but I don't like when any of my friends are teased!"

"You tease Connie and Jean constantly." She points out.

"That's different!"

This isn't gonna work, Christa thinks to herself. Clearly her friend is in denial and going about it in her usual nice way won't help her face the truth. I'm gonna have to channel my inner Ymir. "So then," she gives Sasha a sly look, "You wouldn't mind it if I introduce Cal to one of the cadets who asked me about him?"

Her eye twitches slightly, "Huh?"

"Oh you didn't know? Calian has many admirers and it looks like one girl decided to test the waters and asked me if I can introduce her to him. I didn't cause I thought you liked him but since you don't I guess I'll just tell her it's all cle—"

"NO!"

Sasha gasps and her hand flies to her mouth, shocked herself by her outburst. Christa can't help but grin inside, Gotcha. Finally a look of realization takes over Sasha's expression and she plops back down to her bed. "Oh my god… I do love him."

"I knew it!"

"B-but isn't it too early to be in love with someone I mean we haven't um uh what do people do when they like each other?"

Christa shrugs with a blush, "I'm not sure… but I don't think it's too early for love. The way I've seen it, this has been growing since the very first time you two have met. And with everything we've been through, for it to survive all of this, it's gotta be real. And I think it's something worth trying out."

Sasha feels like she can't breath as she understands what her friend is implying, "You don't mean…?"

"That's up to you." With that she gets up and makes for the door but Sasha stops her.

"Wait but… what if he says no?"

Christa thinks back to what Ymir had told her about the conversation Calian had before he partook in the mission with the Scouts. She smiles sweetly at the red head, "Something tells me he won't."

And she bids her friend goodnight, leaving her alone to dwell on her thoughts and newly discovered feelings.

Old Scouts Headquarters

"So the old Survey Corps Headquarters was a castle? Not exactly what I pictured boss." Calian says as they hitch their horses next to the building that will be holding his old friend.

Hanje chuckles as she does the same, "Yea didn't last that long cause of it's distance from the walls and river, we all figured out how useless it was pretty quickly."

"So why even use it in the first place?"

Hanje throws her hands behind her head as she heads towards the building with a relaxed stride. "The bigwigs say it's cause of budget reasons but real answer? They just wanted to screw us over."

Howlett shakes his head, "Something I'm told is a recurrin theme."

"That's what happens when you let people with no thirst for knowledge into positions of power!"

Cal snorts, "if Moblit were here he'd freak out cause that sounds a little too close to some uprisin kinda speech."

Hanje gives him a sly grin, "You never know!" she claps her hands together and rubs them enthusiastically, "oh I can't wait to work with Titan Eren!"

"it's just Eren."

"That's what I said! Ugh I hate walking I'm gonna go on ahead!"

She starts sprinting, with Calian keeping up, thanks to his height, his pace was closer to a jog and so expended no real energy. She rounds the corner and immediately bounds down the stairs heading straight to the closed door. Concerned, Calian calls out, "Hey wait a minute I think your comin in a little too hot!"

Not a second later she yelps as she slams face first into the door. Cal shakes his head, So this is why Moblit is always concerned. Petra unlocks the door and allows Hanje in, who's still rubbing her sore head. But she quickly forgets the pain as she salutes, "good evening gentlemen and lady of Levi Squad! Have you made yourselves at home in the castle?"

"you're early." Levi states as he sips on his tea. He puts it down and sees Calian. "and you brought a brat with you."

Cal raises an eyebrow and turns to Hanje, while pointing at Levi. "Did he just call me 'brat'?"

She pats his back, "term of endearment." She explains, "How could I stay put now when we have such an esteemed guest in our midst! Sorry for the wait, Eren. I'm charged with experimenting on the two Titans we caught alive in the city. I want you to help me out with tomorrow's experiments. I came to ask permission for that."

This surprises Eren, "An experiment? What am I supposed to—"

"What else but that totally awesome thing you do!" Hanje cuts in, flushed with excitement, eyes wide and sweating, a mad expression as her fingers wiggle in an unnerving way that's somewhat putting Eren on edge.

He leans away slightly, "Uh… I can't give you permission myself. I don't have authority over myself, you see."

Sadly that's true. And Calian can see how much Eren hates it, despite his understanding of the situation. He's spent enough time with the Shinganshina native to know how much he values freedom, slightly above his goal to killing all titans. Must be tearin him apart inside knowin that he's shackled in more ways than most cause of his power.

"What exactly are these experiments on the titans?" Eren asked.

Calians heart sinks when Eren asks that. He just spent the better part of the day hearing all about what Hanje's plans are and he is not eager to do so once again. This is a sentiment that seems to be shared by the rest of the occupants as Levi, followed quickly by the entire squad, gets up without a word and leaves. Calian doesn't hesitate to follow them. Eren looks confused, "Cal?"

"I already know all about this so I'll leave yall to it." And he quickly closes the door behind him.

He sighs with relief at the same time as the rest of the squad. Gunther snorts, "I guess you're fully aware of dangerous questions that shouldn't be asked around the Section Commander."

"Honestly, I didn't even ask anything. We just spent the whole ride here talkin about it." He answers with a shrug.

Petra wipes her hands on her pants before offering it to Calian, "I don't think we properly introduced ourselves, my name is Petra Ral."

He shakes her hand, his enveloping hers almost like a glove, "Cadet Calian Howlett at your service."

The rest introduce themselves as well, "Eld Jinn."

"Gunther Schultz."

"Oluo Bozado."

Petra glares at him for a few seconds expectantly but he purposely looks away from her. She then smacks his head and whispers something to him. He rubs the sore spot, "ok ok! Look kid, … thanks for the help. It wasn't needed mind you! But I couldn't spend the entire mission impressing everyone, you needed your moment to shine too I guess."

The tall cadet gives him an unimpressed look, "Gee thanks. I'm happy my 'moment to shine' was to keep ya from bein eaten."

El shakes his head, "Can't you just be normal Oluo?"

"What? He's a rookie! And you've got a long way to go before you get to my level kid. Wait till you've run another hundred missions huh?"

Petra glares at him but she sees a smirk grow on Calians lips, "Wow another hundred missions, must've taken a while huh? Hey that reminds me, how old are ya?"

Confused Oluo answers, "I'm 19."

Howlett cringes, "yikes, ya got some city miles on ya!"

The 3 squad members snort and try to stifle their laugh as Oluo sputters offended, "W-what did you say!? That's no way to talk to a—"

"Elder got it."

Petra stops trying to stifle her laugh and just lets it go as do the others with oluo steaming with embarrassment. "You should watch your mouth or else you'll be punished for insubordination!"

Raising an eyebrow, Calian asks, "I thought Levi was the leader of this squad? Are ya the second in command?"

Quickly Eld answers, "No. I am." While giving a look to Oluo.

"Then you should do something Eld!"

"I would but this small exchange has been far too entertaining."

Oluo crosses his arms and pouts as Petra specially relishes in his discomfort, "You had it coming. You used to never talk and act like this. If you're trying to be like captain Levi, it's embarrassing. You're not him and you never will be."

He shakes his head, "Oh Petra, you have no idea do you?" he smirks, "just what I'm capable of!"

Calian crosses his arms as the rest of the squad groans, "Really? So you're implyin you're gonna be at the Captains level pretty soon?"

"W-well not soon. But I'm sure as we continue to work and train together I'll be able to reach new heights."

Petra rolls her eyes, "Some heights are just not attainable, that's why I aim for what's not impossible. But I gotta say you handled yourself pretty well in battlefield, especially for someone so new!"

Cal shrugs, "It was nothin, especially compared to ya'll. Heh, no wonder you're the special operations squad!"

Oluo opens his mouth to say something but Gunther cuts him off, "Don't try to sell yourself short cadet! You took those Titans down like as if you were born for this! I'm sure glad to know you'll be having our backs on the field form now on!"

Eld nods with him, "if you're this good now, I can't wait to see how you'll be with experience." He smirks at Oluo, "Maybe you'll be the one to reach Captain Levi's level first."

Oluo glares but keeps his mouth shut. Then Gunther asks, "Hey that reminds me, when you saved Oluo. How did you stop that Ti—"

"Enough chit chat."

The Squad jumps slightly at the sound of their Captain's commanding voice. Levi coolly stares at the occupants of the hall. "It's time to rest up, we have a long day ahead of ourselves tomorrow and I better not see anyone slacking just cause they're tired."

Squad quickly breaks off to their individual rooms, none willing to disobey their leader for fear of his wrath. Calian was about to go but then, "Not you."

Cal looks at the shorter Captain questioningly and Levi says, ""let's talk."

The mess hall in the former Scouts Headquarters was surprisingly stocked with fresh food and assortments, to which Levi took advantage of as he quickly ordered Cal to brew some tea for the both of them. Didn't ya already drink tea? He wondered but did so anyway. Once the tea was done he pours it into two cups and brings it to where Levi was sitting. Levi takes the cup, holding it in a strange way as he drank it.

"Hm… not bad. Someone teach you how to make a good cup of tea, did they?"

Calian nods as he takes a sip, holding the cup delicately by the handle. "My parents did when I was younger."

"Really? They must've been good people. You should be grateful to them."

He smiles sadly to himself, "I'm always grateful for them."

Levi's eyes narrow slightly, "They aren't alive." He states bluntly.

"Passed during the attack on Shinganshina." He confirms, not minding the bluntness of his statement.

"… Sorry."

Howlett chuckles, "Ya aint gotta say that. Looks like it almost hurt."

Levi glares as Calian sips his tea again. "You seem to grasp Titan combat much better than most cadets." He notes.

"That's what everyone keeps tellin me. I just fight that's all there's to it."

"That kinda talent doesn't come from just anywhere, parents in the military."

He scoffs, "My dad was a hunter and sold pelts for a livin, my mom a seamstress. I guess I'm an odd ball like ya cap'n."

"Excuse me?" he asks, affronted.

"Everyone knows about ya, how ya didn't even have one day of trainin and ya quickly made a name for yourself as Humanity's strongest Soldier. Guess that kinda talent does come from no where."

Levi levels a glare at him, "Tch, You can pull that attitude all you want on Oluo. But you mind your manners with me. I'm not as forgiving."

They having a staring match for a while before Calian relents, this was all just to see how far he can push the envelop with the Captain anyway. "I gotta ask, why're ya so curious? I'd understand it from boss but I didn't think ya'd be curious."

Levi remains expressionless. This was truly meant so that he can gain some type of information on where Calian came from. What Hanje had stated was true, the similarities between them were too much to be a coincidence. His similarities to—

"You and Eren are both to have one-on-one training with me from now on. Commander Erwin's orders. I wanted to see just much of a waste of time you'd end up being."

"And your conclusion?"

"… You may not be too much a disappointment."

"Heh, I gotta ask Cap'n. why me?"

"Who knows? I don't. But that's what Erwin ordered."

"Alright then."

The two remain in silence as they finish their tea. Calian gets up and grabs both cups to clean but as he walks away Levi stops him. "How much do you know about your parents?"

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me."

The tall cadet stares at the little man for a while, unsure of what to say. Some negative emotions do bubble up, but he keeps them at bay, unwilling to lash out when he's only just made it into the Scouts and he definitely doesn't want to jeopardize his fragile position. "They were the best people anyone could ever know. My mom was as beautiful a soul as she was strong. My dad, he loved unconditionally and didn't give two shits about what anyone said, not about marryin a dark woman like they always jeered and especially not for raisin a kid that clearly wasn't even his."

For the first time, Levi's expression changes and he looks in wonderment and curiosity. "Yea that's right, I don't know who my biological father is, but I don't give a damn. The guy who raised me, who protected me and tucked me into bed every night; that's my real dad. I hope that satisfactory for ya, Captain."

Levi nods and Calian leaves. Leaving the Captain brood on what he had just learned.

Calian awakens to rapid knocks on his door. He groans as he rubs the sleep out of his eyes. He opens the door to see a frantic Moblit. Fully awake and alert, Calian asks, "What's wrong?"

"Where's Squad leader Hanje?!"

"She's still with Eren I think, what happened?"

"The test subjects… both titans were killed!"

"What?!"

Caliaj quickly dresses himself and rides with the frantic Hanje and Molbit as they streamline back to the Titan Research Facility. As soon as they get there Calian can see the cloud of steam originating from inside the facility and once they make it to the clearing Hanje falls to her knees hysterically crying. "SONNY! BEAN! THIS CAN'T BE REAL!"

She clutches her hair as she wails, "Someone tell me I'm dreaming!"

Calian shakes his head, their one ticket to truly understanding their enemy, their ticket to understanding the titans, robbed right from under them. He double takes when he looks back and sees Eren… easily finding him in the crowd due to yaeger being the only one with a hood on. Are ya Fuckin kiddin me?!

Gunther grimaces, "Those test subjects were very valuable, wasit a solder?"

Eld looks on at Hanje as she continues wailing, "Yes. The culprits are still unknown. Both Titans were killed before sunrise. When a guard spotted them, they escaped using their ODM gear."

One of our own? He hears a scoff behind him, "Check it out! Squad leader Hanje is losing her shit!" Oluo says with a snicker.

Petra narrows her eyes but a shadow looms over them both. Oluo gulps as he sees Calian Tower over him and glaring down with his stormy grey eyes that seemed to have darkened with his mood. "Ain't nothing funny about this. Someone didn't want us to learn more."

A hand clamps onto his shoulder and Calian turns to the owner of it, which was Erwin. "Tell me, What do you see there? Who do you think is the enemy?"

Titans would've been the very first thing that would come out of his mouth. But He stops himself. There was something… off about what Erwin asked him. It's such a simple question, but with what just happened, it seems like there might be a much heavier implication. One he's not sure he'll like.

"Sorry, don't mind me."

Calian stares after the commander as he walks away, stunned.

Later that night

Levi does his last rounds, checking every corner of the old Scout Headquarters. IT's very late in the night but for an insomniac like Levi, it's the same old routine. He's about to head to the mess hall to brew more tea when he hears muffled sounds of someone talking in a hurried and hushed voice. He takes a few silent steps forward and leans close to the door to hear what's being said,

"It's all your goddamn fault Hanje! You idiot! You useless fucking idiot! You can't stop letting everyone down can't you?"

Shock rocked through his mind as he recognizes the voice, it was Hanje. He hears her sniffling, confirming to him that she is in fact still crying. But it was strange to here the reason why. Since finding the dissolving remains of her … cherished test subjects, Hanje had been inconsolable, raving about her precious 'Sawney and Bean'. But hearing her berate herself? He pushes the door open, startling the section commander and she quickly wipes her eyes and nose with her hand. Levi grimaces in disgust at the sight of the snot spreading on her skin but doesn't comment on it.

"Oh, Levi, didn't know you where there."

"So first your eyesight is shit, now your hearing is too?"

Hanje snorts halfheartedly, "You sure know your way with words Shorty." She says with a forced smile.

One Levi can see right through. It's not the first time he has seen her like this. Despite her eccentric and energetic personality and demeanor, Hanje does have a rather sensitive side to her. Many times he has found her in her lab or her coming to his room, crying after the death of comrades or failed experiments. He doesn't say much, his presence was what she seemed to need. And there are times, he'll admit, that she has done the same for him. Where she'll go on and on rambling about whatever comes to mind, or eventually staying quiet and being there.

"Are you done feeling sorry for yourself? Because if you are, you should get rest now. I sacrificed tomorrows scheduled cleaning to make room for your experiments with Eren. Don't let it be for nothing."

Instantly, her eyes sparkle once again, "Wait… Eren's transformation experiment!" She hops back on to her feet.

"No use standing around and sulking, I've got scientific models to be prepping! (yawn) I gotta get (yawn) write it or I'll—"

She stumbles slightly and Levi catches. "Tch, how many all-nighters did you pull four eyes?"

Her bleary eyes meet his as she sheepishly grins, "oh um, 2… or 4. I can't really remember."

He shakes his head and glares as he adjusts his hold on her and guides her to her bed. "How do you expect to get anything done if your snoring on your feet shitty glasses?"

Sleepily she answers, "Sleep is for the weak, there's more important matters to attend to than just a few hours of shut-eye. I don't need to sleep!"

She tries to get up but Levi pushes her down roughly, "really? So if you count to 10 right now, you'll still be awake?"

"Of course!"

"Prove it."

"Fine!...1…2…3….4…" with each passing number, her eyelids get heavier and heavier, her words slurring until they turn into light snores.

"Tch, exactly."

Keeping mind to not wake her, he carefully removes her glasses from her head and places them on a night stand near the bed. Before he gets up, he sees that a few stray strands of hair have fallen onto her face. Gently, he brushes them behind her ear. His thumb delicately caresses her cheek before he pulls away and slowly exits her room. Just before he closes the door he looks back at her sleeping form,

"… You're not useless Hanje."

And there you have it folks! I want to thank everyone who has favorited and followed and reviewed, thanks to everyone who enjoys this story! i was glad to get this out earlier than i said which also means i can hopefully get the next one out before the last Chapter of AOT is published because i'm pretty sure i'm gonna need a few days to recover once i read it ;-; anyway i hope you enjoy this chapter, till the next one!