CHAPTER 21 - THE TOURNEY, PART IV.
"Congratulations young Wizard and Witch,
You managed to get through all the tasks of the tourney. You showed you were able to corporate, you unleashed your primal instincts and you used calm logic. All that's left, is to show who you are inside.
Choose an animal which describes you the best.
L Lawliet"
Misa gasped as she read out loud the scroll with a message from their professor.
"Light… Light we did it! This is it! The final task! We finished the tourney." She said happily and read the scroll again for herself.
Light did not share her enthusiasm. He was already walking around the room, looking at the animals. Six of them were glowing in red color, six of them in blue. It could mean that those red ones were meant for women and blue ones for men. It also matched the colors of their houses.
But those colors could be also connected to the nature of our second gender. Light thought and bit his lower lip. More important than the colors, were animals sitting on pedestals. They were all looking at Light with curious eyes. There was a fox, a lynx, a red panda, a mongoose, a raven, a jackal, a chameleon, a poodle, a parrot, a rhino, a zebra and a bighorn sheep.
When Misa finished reading she quickly looked around and her eyes landed on a parrot glowing in red color. Her choice was made instantly. Then her eyes searched through the blue animals. When she found what she was searching for, she giggled and clapped her hands with enthusiasm: "This is easy… our Patronus takes the shape of an animal which is closest to our mind. So we just need to…"
"No…" Light interrupted her sharly, before she could finish. Of course he was thinking about the same thing but: "... it's too obvious. The topic of this tourney is InsideOut. I don't think Lawliet wants us to pick something we already know. He wants us to unleash something we are hiding away."
Misa frowned and folded her hands: "But Light... is a fact! Our Patronus is a guardian spirit reflecting an animal which is closest to what we have in our minds. Soooo it makes sense for me to choose a parrot and your patronus is a mongoose…"
"Patronus can change with age and experience, Misa." Light cut her off again and his eyes landed on one of the animals glowing in red.
"So?" Misa asked, not knowing what he was pointing at. But no reaction came. Light was fully focused on the animal in front of him. Its smooth, elegant movements. Its intelligent eyes saw right through him. Light felt his chest filling up with a cloud of pain. His mind was flooded with childhood memories.
Damn him… how does he know about this? Light cursed internally and felt even more confused than before. It really felt like Lawliet built this whole tourney just for him.
Maybe he wants to punish me for being stubborn. He thought as he was looking his past straight into the eyes. No matter how hard the tourney was until now and how much it helped him, this was simply too much. With this final task, Lawliet set a mirror to his very soul and opened something, Light was desperately trying to forget about. Without even knowing it, Light fell down on his knees, kneeling a two meters in front of that animal's pedestal.
Misa watched as Light fell to the ground and hurried up to him, kneeling beside him. He looked like he had seen a ghost.
"Light?! What's going on?!"
There was a moment of silence, before he answered. But he answered with a question: "At what age did you first conjure up your Patronus, Misa?"
She frowned: "At 13, just like anyone else…"
"So if your guardian spirit changed from your birth to the time when you first tried the spell, you wouldn't even know…"
Misa sat beside him, studying his bothersome expression: "Light… I don't understand what you are getting at."
Light shrugged and looked at her: "As I said, Patronus can change with age and experience. It practically grows and shapes with the personality. But one's personality is shaping and bending with many things. The family environment, education, hopes, fears, pain…"
"And?"
"Do you know The legend of a cursed king?"
He answered with question again. Misa was getting a bit angry by that. He was talking in riddles. That was unlike him.
When Misa didn't answer, Light started the story telling: "The legend says, the king and queen of an old kingdom used powerful, long forgotten magic, to conjure up their newborn son's Patronus. They wanted to know if he would be strong enough to rule the difficult Kingdom which was plundered by many years of wars. When it turned out that the boy's Patronus was a butterfly, they were horrified. They didn't see the guardian spirit as strong enough to protect the country. So they raised the boy with harsh discipline, to make him stronger. They managed to turn his Patronus into a bear. But it ended up a disaster. The young prince was only doing things for himself and his own benefit. He practically sold off the Kingdom. Piece by piece. Until there was only his castle left. In the end, all his servants ran away and he was left with only his money and old broken parents. The former king and queen had to take care of him as if they were his servants. Later on, when the castle was surrounded by enemy troops the king and queen were captured and sentenced to death. While their son, the prince was hidden in their castle and drinking himself to oblivion. Before the death came for the parents, they realized their mistake. They didn't make their son the bear to protect. They made him an old, broken bear, who didn't care about anything or anyone. He was just hiding in his lair, waiting for the end. They had broken his spirit."
As Light finished the story telling heavy silence spreaded around the room. Misa started slowly realizing where Light was heading with that. If the legend was true, they were all born pure, with a Patronus that defined them. But if they grew up under a bad influence, their personality would change and their Patronus with them. They would lose their way. Their own, very original personality. That was the message of that legend in the first place. If the king and queen in that story let their son be a butterfly, their kingdom might have changed for the better. Because butterflies were animals bringing a massive transformation.
"So you wanna say that… if our Patronus never changed in our entire life, we would all live for our purpose?" Misa asked almost in a whisper.
Light answered with a small nod.
Misa gave it a thought. She really tried. But no matter how hard she was trying it wasn't working. This wasn't her way of thinking. It sounded naive. Light actually sounded vulnerable. There was something strange about that and Misa didn't like it a bit.
"Light… I cant agree with you. If we never changed in our life, we would never grow up! It is natural that our Patronus and our personality changes! I am not saying that the legend has a wrong message, but this is not how the world usually works." Misa said, trying to lead him back on a way. Which was strange because usually it was the other way around.
"I am not saying that we shouldn't grow up! I am saying that what happens to us during the process, can change us so much that we won't even recognize ourselves!" Light snapped emotively.
Misa watched him with worried eyes. He was deadly serious. He even had tears behind his eyes.
"Light…" she whispered and put her hand on his shoulder. He shivered and shook her hand off.
"It doesn't matter… we just have to choose the right animal." Light said a little angrily.
Misa put the hand on his shoulder again and insisted: "No, Light, talk to me please."
There was no reaction from him. He shifted his sight upwards again, looking at the animal. That was the moment when Misa finally realized what she missed. Light definitely didn't tell her the whole legend by a chance.
Holly crap… Misa thought and her eyes widened.
"Light… at what age did you first conjure up your Patronus?" she asked.
Light closed his eyes and his head fell deep between his shoulders: "I was five…"
"Five?! You were able to conjure Patronus at five?! Are you even normal?! You shouldn't even have had a wand at that age!" Misa yelled in shock.
Light looked at her and only shrugged: "My father works at the Ministry, Misa. The rules were always a bit bent for me… at least until a certain moment."
Misa frowned: "Until you presented?"
Light nodded and looked at the floor in front of him: "Yes… then everything changed. My life, my friends, my teachers, my career prospects… everything."
"And your Patronus?"
Light nodded and lifted his eyes again, locking it with the eyes of the animal on the pedestal in front of him. Misa finally realized why he was starting at it so longingly the whole time. It must have been his former guardian spirit. She stood up and made a step closer to examine the animal. It was a beautiful, medium sized wild cat. It had big pawns, wild fur with dark spots and a short tail. But most interesting were the animal's eyes. They were sharp and reflexive, looking straight into your soul. Misa thought that those eyes looked almost like Lawliet's. Then she looked at the ears of the animal and realized what wild cat she was looking at. Tufts of black hair on the tips of ears meant it was…
"Light… does it mean… your former guardian spirit was… a Lynx?" Misa asked and turned at Light, who was sitting under the pedestal, looking at the graceful cat with tearful eyes.
"Quite a change, huh? From a wild cat to a small, termite eating predator…" he said with an irony and wiped tears from his eyes.
Misa opened and closed her mouth. Seeing Light like this was new. It was probably for the first time, when Misa realized Light really is an omega. He never acted emotionally. Ever. Maybe that's why it was so easy for her to believe that he accepted his second gender. Because she never saw him cry about it. But now that she was thinking about it, that wasn't the omegan way of dealing with things. Everyone needed to cry from time to time. But omegas needed it to get negative emotions from their system. It was scientifically proved.
Misa was not sure what to do. She couldn't use the scent glands again and she didn't have the guts to tell him to just cry. She knew how to deal with arrogant stubborn Light, not emotional wreck Light. She needed him to snap out of it.
"Light… you can't think of it like that… I remember the symbolism of Mongoose from the 3rd year. When professor Trippet was explaining it to you. He said that Mongoose means there is no problem you can not overcome. That it is practically a courage itself. I think that suits you pretty well."
"I know that but…" Light made a small pause thinking, before turning to Misa: "... what if there were no obstacles for omegas in the society? I wouldn't need that courage. I wouldn't need to overcome things. I might have still been a Lynx."
Misa didn't understand why he was so obsessed with the idea of having Lynx as his guardian spirit. For her it was just another spell. Sure, powerful and cool one, but why was Light holding on to it so much?
"Light… what is the symbolism of Lynx?" she asked.
Light eyed the wild cat again and chucked: "Lynxes' primal ability is seeing through things. They are able to look through layers of deception and see things for what they are. They always find the truth, no matter how deep it is hidden."
Misa still didn't see it as a reason to be so emotionally thrown off. But she understood a little better what it meant for him. Light was repeating it the whole night. How him being an omega destroyed his dreams.
"I see… it fits your desire to be an Auror. They need a high level of ability to see through things…"
"Yes…" Light breathed out.
There was a moment of silence between them. Light was calming down by every passing second, so Misa finally asked:
"So do you think… the animal you should choose, is Lynx?"
"I don't know…" Light shrugged. There was always a possibility that it was the other way around. That Lawliet wanted him to accept who he is now, which would really mean choosing Mongoose. But it somehow didn't feel right.
Before Light knew what was happening, Misa was kneeling in front of him again and she was pressing her hand on his beating heart.
"What does your heart tell you?" she asked with an encouraging smile.
Light didn't need a second to think about it. He just knew. Although there was no logic in it, his aching heart was still coming back to the wild cat. He smiled back at her: "That my guardian spirit is Lynx. It's always been."
Misa nodded with a small smile: "See? Your inside is now out… I think Lawliet will be pretty proud of you!"
Light felt heat coming to his face and his heart started wildly jumping in his chest. Luckily, Misa's hand was away from the area at that time. He cleared his throat:
"But what about you? Do you think you were always a Parrot?"
Misa made a strange face and whiled: "I don't knoooooow… I never thought about it until now!"
They both stood up from the ground and silently eyed the rest of the animals in the room. The Lynx and the Mongoose were out of the game. That meant there were still ten animals to pick up from. But as Light's animal was glowing in red color, he was quite sure Misa's would be blue one. Which also meant, she wasn't the parrot. Because the parrot was also red. Light eyed the blue animals. Without the mongoose there were five of them left: a red panda, a jackal, a chameleon, a poodle and a rhino.
Without a second thought, Light immediately chose a poodle for her, but didn't say a thing. If this tourney was about unleashing what was inside, Misa needed to figure out herself. So he stayed silent and watched the girl walking between those animals.
Misa was confused. She never really thought that her Patronus could be something different than a large parrot. It fitted her perfectly. Parrot symbolizes pride, attraction and self-confidence. She was also always talking, gossiping and she was also able to hurt people but her large mouth. Just like a macaw that was able to cut off a finger by its beak. Now that she was facing the fact that there might be something completely different hidden inside her, she was not sure what to choose. She stopped in front of a chameleon for a moment, thinking that she was also able to change colors. But it didn't feel right. Any of those other animals didn't feel right.
Light watched Misa silently, not sure how to help her without telling her his opinion directly, but her chuckle suddenly pulled him out of his thoughts.
"What is it?" he asked and felt hopeful when he realized she stopped in front of the poodle.
"You know, when I was very small, my family had a dog like that. He was fun. Always running around, barking, playing… but he was also a great companion. I remember falling asleep with him by my side. It was comforting."
Corners of Light's mouth lifted up in a smile: "Sounds a bit like you are describing yourself."
Misa turned to him: "Really? Do you think so? Do you think my Patronus should be a poodle?"
Light shrugged and smiled: "I don't know. But you certainly share some characteristics."
Misa folded hands on her chest, while thinking out loud: "Light… I am not sure about this… it can be risky. What if it's not a poodle? What if we will lose the tourney?"
Light rolled his eyes and moved forward. In a second he pressed his palm on her chest, above her heart, asking: "What does your heart tell you?"
Misa's eyes widened and for a moment a time stopped.
Then a high pitch yelled echoed in the room: "That you are touching my boob you pervert!"
Light quickly withdrew his hand and his face turned red as a tomato: "Aaaa….. I am sorry! I didn't mean it like that!"
Misa gave him a hard look and then suddenly started laughing: "I know! I am just making fun of you…" she said and put her hand on his shoulder. Light gave her a bored look, telling her, he disapproves of jokes like that but then she said: "But just because we are friends now, doesn't mean you can touch me wherever you want!"
Light rolled his eyes and folded hands on his chest: "Oh come on… you were the one who used her scent on me today!"
Misa giggled: "Hihi… that was also fun!"
No… it wasn't fun. Light thought. But he understood what she meant. They were just getting to know each other again so they needed to figure out their comfort zones and boundaries. Light already felt that Misa managed to push herself into few of his no entry zones and he was surprised himself that he didn't mind that much. Sure, he will need some time to process it all, but he could do that later. And he was quite sure his reasoning will scold him pretty bad about losing his composure like that. But it didn't matter now. Right now, he felt good. He felt opened and connected to his inner self. And because his inner omega was still completely silent, it could mean only one thing: he was still in sync.
Light cleared his throat, pushing himself and Misa back to reality: "Can we get back to the point please?"
Misa nodded and turned to face the poodle again: "Alright… I guess there is no other choice. If it's not a parrot and it definitely isn't any other of these animals… it has to be a poodle."
"Alright…" Light nodded with a smile.
"Now what?" Misa asked and frowned. There was no indication how to choose the animal and finish the tourney. Just choosing them mentaly, obviously, wasn't enough.
Light turned towards the Lynx again and came closer. He tried to touch the animal but his hand went through it. Exactly as he expected. He frowned and folded hands on his chest.
"We will need to use a charm, to summon them up." Light said.
"You mean Accio?!" Misa asked, surprised.
Light chuckled at that. It would be funny if Lawliet used the easiest possible summoning spell at the very peak of the tourney.
"I don't think it's gonna be that eas…" he didn't even finish the sentence because he heard Misa saying: "Accio Patronus!"
He turned around to see the poodle jumping down the pedestal, running towards Misa. She gasped in surprise and then started laughing out loud, when the little dog was making circles around her and barked with a high voice.
Oh you've got to be kidding me… Light thought and shook his head in disbelief. He was watching how the small light dog practically forced Misa to stand in the middle of the round room and then it sat in front of her, wagging its tail and waiting.
"You were saying?" Misa asked and gave Light a teasing look.
Light rolled his eyes: "Yeah… nothing…" he said and turned towards the Lynx again. He took a deep breath before letting the charm from his lips: "Accio Patronus!"
In that moment the wild cat stopped licking its paws and slowly looked Light straight in the eyes. They were staring at each other for a moment long enough for Light to start worrying he made a mistake. But a cat is a cat. It has enough time for everything. So after a good 30 seconds, the Lynx finally stood up on all four paws and jumped down the pedestal. It didn't head straight to Light, but it started pacing around the round room instead. The wild cat was walking with long and elegant steps and its eyes never left Light's. Light felt like the animal was trying to analyze him. Like it felt he hesitated. Light knew he had to be self conscious now. He had to show the animal, he meant his choice. So he took a deep breath and went to stand next to Misa who was watching the situation with wide eyes.
The lynx made one more round around the room.
Light stood up straight, as a statue, trying to look as calm as the cat itself. But his heart was wildly beating in his chest. He heard every step of the animal, although it was impossible to hear it, because its paws were not really touching the ground.
When the animal finished the circle it slowly turned towards Light and made two very slow steps closer. They were watching each other with the same piercing eyes. Light felt that the cat was staring right into his very soul. And when he was looking into its eyes he saw his own reflection. And he knew he was looking the very same way. At that moment he knew, his choice was right. Because deep inside him, there was still a Lynx. His guarding spirit. His Patronus.
The wild cat finally sat down, a meter in front of Light, next to the enthusiastic poodle.
Then… there was a moment of silence. The two students and two spirits were just looking at each other.
Both Light and Misa knew, something was going to happen. And it did. Both animals suddenly moved forward, jumping at its owners. It happened extremely fast, but Light could swear, he saw it all in slow motion. How the Lynx jumped at his chest and literally disappeared inside his body. He could feel that some part of his mind just opened and the animal was settling there. It settled itself into a ball and went to sleep. But even while sleeping, Light could feel its piercing eyes watching. Guarding him. Keeping him safe.
Light didn't even realize he closed his eyes. He was sure he didn't. But he was in a complete dark now, so he must have, at some point.
"Light?" he heard Misa saying his name.
He took a deep breath and opened his eyes. They were back in the castle. In front of the door to the great hall. Door, which was now closed. But the whole school must have been there, as they heard loud voices and clinking of dishes. Light opened and closed his mouth. He had no idea how they got there. It must have been somehow related to the moment those animals merged with them. They must have transferred them back. Probably another of Lawliet's magic tricks. Light got lost in his thoughts for a moment, until he felt Misa hanging herself on his arm. He looked at her and she was smiling from ear to ear.
"We made it Light… we finished the tourney."
Light nodded and smiled back at her.
"So… will we go there?" She asked, pointing at the door to the great hall.
Light hesitated. Sure, they were going there but first…
"Misa… about everything we got through tonight…" he started, wanting to settle some boundaries but she cut him off.
"Don't worry… I will not reveal your secrets. We are friends now, aren't we?" She said and squeezed his arm.
Light nodded: "Yes, yes, we are. I just need to make sure you won't tell anyone."
Misa rolled her eyes: "Oh come on, Light. Trust me a little. I may be a gossip, but secret is a secret. I won't tell anyone that you hate being an omega, that your scent smells like autumn, that I saw you cry and that you actually enjoy being around professor Lawliet."
Now it was Light's time to roll his eyes. When she said it like this, he realized that she had a pretty long list of compromising information against him now. How she managed to decompose him like this during just three hours, was beyond Light.
"I trust you. Please don't let me down." He said and gave her a pleading look.
Misa nodded and gave him a mischievous smile: "I wont… I would be against myself If I would let down my number one source of information about L Lawliet."
Light chuckled. He knew she was joking. Well she partly wasn't, but he was sure it was not just about that. They had a past. They had something they could build their friendship on.
"Aahh… is that why you wanted to be friends, Misa?" he teased.
She giggled: "Hihi… no… but it's a nice bonus."
"Oh Gods, what did I get myself into?" Light asked theatrically and looked up at the ceiling.
"Mmmm… nothing bad! Just a cool friend ship." Misa said. Then she fell silent for a moment, but Light felt something more was about to come. And he wasn't wrong about that.
"But you should become a member of Lawli's fanclub!" She hurtled and squeezed his arm even more.
"No way! I am not doing that!" He said, totally horrified at the thought of him, being in the company of God knows how many love-sick idiots, talking about their dark haired professor.
"Okay, okay, I get it." Misa started: "You don't want anyone to know you actually like him so I will think of you as an unofficial part and you can…"
Misa was still talking, but Light didnt listen. He couldn't help but smile at her chit chat about nothing. But he needed her to stop. It was time to leave it all behind. He moved forward and dragged her with himself towards the door to the great hall.
Hi guys!
Sorry it took me such a long time to update. The tourney was kinda hard to write. I had to think it through a lot.
I know I promised the LawLight reunion but this chapter got a bit longer than expected. So it's gonna be in the next one. For 100 percent! ;)
Enjoy spring days and take in as much sun as possible!
Love, J.