Cullen found himself extremely tense and on edge for the next few hours as they sat around the campsite with Clan Lavellan, discussing the events of the last year and getting Ellana caught up on concerns within the clan.
"You have had such a difficult past year, why are you travelling so soon to another land?" One of the elders in the camp directed towards Ellana.
Cullen watched as she brushed of the question and mentioned something about trade negotiations. He had been wondering how much information Ellana wished to share with the Clan regarding her condition and their true reason for traveling to Nevarra; apparently she had made the decision to hold back.
"Will you be travelling to the main city?" A young woman called out.
"Mm… yes, we will." Ellana continued the lie.
"Perhaps you'll run into Silvhen." Keeper Deshanna frowned, "He left the Clan shortly after your departure. We've heard rumors that he has stationed himself there."
Cullen watched as Ellana raised her eyebrows. "I had noticed his absence. Nevarra… interesting; although not terribly surprising."
He cleared his throat, "It must be fairly uncommon for a Dalish elf to leave and move to the city, I've rarely heard of it."
"Yes," Ellana quickly cut in before anyone else could respond, "It's pretty rare. Let's not discuss such things."
Deshanna's eyes lit up and her lips curled into a light smile, "Ellana does not wish for us to continue speaking about him."
Cullen's eyes shifted to Ellana and he found himself surprised by a slight blush forming across her cheeks. He was instantly curious about this Dalish elf named Silvhen.
"I just – " Ellana stammered and switched to Elven so that Cullen could no longer understand what she said. Deshanna began to chuckle and Ellana finally turned to Cullen, switching back to the common tongue and whispering to him, "I'll tell you later. It's… I don't want to talk about it around everyone else."
Cullen nodded and did his best to put the subject out of his mind for the next few hours while they enjoyed dinner and continued warming around the fire. He was of course, very unsuccessful in this attempt and found his thoughts regularly wondering back to the subject. He had suspicions that it was someone Ellana had been previously involved with.
Later that night, Ellana and Cullen began walking towards their tent that was stationed on the far side of camp. Ellana kept nervously glancing over at Cullen. "I'm sure you are wondering what that was all about, when Deshanna brought up Silvhen." She finally spoke.
Cullen nodded and looked at her, "I've sort of gathered that you two must have been…"
"Yes." She turned to face him. "We had been together, somewhat, before I left for the Conclave. I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier… I knew there was a chance that he would be here and I should have given you a heads up about it but – it's been so long, I had kind of forgotten about him. I'm sorry, Cullen. I wasn't expecting Deshanna to bring him up like that."
"Ellana," Cullen smiled, "It's okay. I understand that you were likely with someone before we met and it only makes sense for him to be from your clan." He chuckled, "I'm relieved that he isn't here. Can't say I enjoy the idea of meeting him."
Ellana glanced down, "Yes, well… I was with him – I guess you could say. We were… it was expected that we would bond – become… well, that's our version of marriage…"
Cullen recoiled, yet quickly collected himself. "Oh. So… I see you've had two proposals in life – so far, it seems. Apparently, I have quite the competition: an Emperor and an ex-Dalish turned Nevarrian." He chuckled.
Ellana laughed and grabbed his waist to pull him in for a hug, she was glad to hear him making jokes about the entire scenario. "It was arranged by my Clan, certainly no proposals and certainly no love there. It was like a business transaction, really. Horrible… I was so happy to have a chance to delay when Deshanna sent me to the Conclave. Silvhen never felt as though he belonged with the Dalish and would often joke about leaving, so I'm not surprised to hear he went through with it."
Cullen relaxed his shoulders; it was a nice relief to hear that Ellana hadn't been in love with this man. He switched the topic as they crawled into their tent, "You didn't tell your Clan about travelling to Cumberland, or anything that happened at the Well of Sorrows."
"No…" she snuggled up against him in their thick furs, "I don't want to worry them. I also don't think they'll appreciate that I've opened myself to Blood Magic – no matter how justified my reasoning may have been… and they wouldn't like the idea of my travelling to a Circle. I would prefer them to believe our travel is to the main city and that we are sure to be safe."
"The main city…" Cullen smirked, "also glad we're not going there, since apparently that is where your betrothed lives."
Ellana burst out laughing and lightly hit him on the shoulder, "Commander, I'm starting to think you're jealous! I am telling you ma'arlath, there is no need. I was certainly never in love with him and I would presume he felt the same way towards me. Clans are required to trade with each other in order to take on new members and provide bonding options for eligible adults. Silvhen came to us a few years ago and Keeper Deshanna quickly decided we would be a pair. It was only a physical connection between us – never love."
Cullen tensed; he had been with a few women before Ellana and knew that she had previous partners, as well – of course she had. It still placed an uncomfortable feeling in his stomach hearing her speak of having a 'physical connection' with another man. Regardless of how foolish the sentiment was – it was in the past and they were together now, he still disliked thinking about it.
Ellana picked up that he was feeling tense and placed a hand on his cheek, slowly tracing his jawline with her tiny finger. "With you, I have both of those things." She climbed on top of him and placed light kisses on his lips. Slowly, she snaked her hands down to lift under his shirt and started to pull it over his head.
"Ellana," he pushed his shirt back down and gave her a concerned stare. "Your Clan… should we really be doing that here?"
"It's fine, ma'arlath." She pulled him into a kiss, "We are in our tent. Why shouldn't we?"
"I feel like they'll know somehow…" he grunted, "and won't be pleased."
Ellana laughed, "Then let them know that I am yours and you are mine." Once again, she began to lift Cullen's shirt and was met without resistance this time…
The following morning, Cullen woke up to find Ellana missing from the tent. He quickly dressed and pulled back the cloth door, finding her standing near the center of camp speaking with a few of her clan members. She noticed him starting to exit the tent and quickly came running over to him.
"Cullen! I'm going to go out with a few of the hunters this morning. We should only be gone for a few hours… will you be okay here? Deshanna has promised that she will ensure everyone is kind to you." She gave him a hopeful smile.
Cullen grimaced; he really didn't want to be left alone here with her clan, but could see how excited Ellana was at the idea of hunting. He also recognized they wouldn't want him joining in on the hunt… he was clueless about tracking and would make far too much noise will all of his armor. He forced a smile and nodded, telling her to enjoy herself and that he would find a way to pass his morning here at the camp.
For the next hour, Cullen sat at the fire and quietly ate breakfast while keeping to himself. None of the elves spoke to him, yet he would receive multiple glares and scowls every time one of them glanced in his direction.
"Hi!" a high-pitched voice shot out from behind him. Cullen slightly startled as a tiny female elf with long brown hair jumped into the log bench beside him and began to lean in towards him. "You don't smell awful. My brother told me that all shemlen smell terrible – like druffalo dung. You don't smell like druffalo dung; you smell like her, really – Ellana."
Cullen blushed and found himself shuffling back a little from the invasive elf.
She leaned back and gave him a smile, "I'm Athhel! Ellana and I were really close before she left us last year. She asked me to check in on you while she's hunting. I got a little distracted and kind of forgot about it… but here I am! Better late than never. Did I get that saying right? I speak the common-tongue so rarely. It's wild that we have a shemlen in our camp – I don't think that's ever happened before. Keeper Deshanna would never allow most of us to bring a shemlen visitor – she has a special place in her heart for Ellana. Kind of like a mother – has Ellana told you about her? Or any of us? It's so crazy to be speaking to a shemlen right now! Have you met many Dalish elves?"
Cullen blinked and attempted to process the several questions that had just been thrown at him from the tiny elf – who now sat with widened eyes and a slightly parted mouth staring at him, eagerly awaiting his response. Athhel had just said more to him in one minute than all of the other elves in Clan Lavellan during his entire visit here. "I uh – haven't met any Dalish Elves, other than Ellana. It's an honor to be accepted here in your camp and I greatly appreciate how kind Keeper Deshanna has been."
Athhel began giggling, "You don't need to bother with all of that around me. Don't get me wrong – I love Deshanna! But… I know she doesn't like you. No one in the clan has been very friendly to you, I imagine. We're probably not making this the most enjoyable visit for you… kind of busting your balls, aren't we?" The elf began giggling, "I learned that one last week in one of the shem villages. I think it's funny. You shem and your expressions are hilarious! I love them."
Cullen laughed, "You would get along very well with one of the Inquisition elves, Sera. No wonder Ellana connected with her so quickly."
Athhel shook her head, "A city elf? I don't think so. I find you shem interesting but not a fan of the city elves, myself. Although, I don't find you shem interesting enough to consider being with one. Not sure why Ellana finds you so charming – you're quite enormous, it's rather strange."
Cullen gave her a perplexed look; he was unsure of how to respond to that.
"Oh!" she quickly blurted, "Sorry! That sounded rude, didn't it? I didn't mean it to come out like that, sometimes I just ramble on and on… don't really know when to shut my mouth." She grinned.
"I can see why you were close with Ellana, then." He chuckled.
Athhel burst out laughing and gave him a large grin, "Yes, I miss her. Glad she came back for a visit."
"It meant a great deal for her to come back. I can see how at home she feels here, with you all."
"We can see how happy you make her, you know." Athhel grinned at him, "All of us. The others would never admit it, but we can tell. I can tell – it makes me feel very pleased for her. You care for her – a lot. I still don't get the appeal of this," she poked a small finger at Cullen's bicep, "but it's nice to see that it is protecting her! You look strong. You won't let anything happen to her, will you?"
"I will not." Cullen smiled.
"Good." Athhel laughed, "Ellana can sometimes run into things too quickly and end up in a bit of trouble."
"You don't say…" Cullen gave her a sarcastic look, which triggered a new set of laughter from the elf.
"Yes, I suppose you know her well enough to know that already." Athhel glanced over at an opening in the trees and noticed Ellana returning to the camp with the other hunters. She leaned in towards Cullen, "Don't let it get to you – how the others here may not like you. It's just because you're a shem; you were doomed before you got here. I like you and I'm pleased Ellana has found someone that she cares so strongly for. Tell her I was here the whole time with you, yes?" she grinned and walked away.
Cullen chuckled to himself as the small elf danced away towards the other side of camp and noticed Ellana making her way towards him. Athhel's words had greatly lifted his spirits and he was feeling much better after their quick chat.
"Good! I'm glad to see Athhel came over to keep you company." Ellana sat down beside him and he noticed the presence of dry blood smeared on her leg – likely from wiping the edge of a blade on her skin to clean it.
"Yes," Cullen smiled, "she is quite the character. Very nice though and we had a great talk. The hunt was successful?"
"It was!" Ellana beamed, "Fantastic, actually." She let out a loud sigh, "Creators, I miss hunting for my meals."
Cullen couldn't relate to that feeling; he was never that interested in hunting, much more concerned with fighting men than animals. "I'm glad you enjoyed yourself," he lightly patted her leg, using his thumb to try and wipe the blood off.
She gave him a funny look and laughed as she stood up. "Time to skin the carcass, Cullen. I'll be getting a lot messier than that. Cleaning oneself comes after you clean the meat."
He amusingly raised an eyebrow as she gave him a wink and started walking over towards the hunters and the beasts they had brought back. Back at Skyhold, it was easy to forget that Ellana was Dalish; she fit in so quickly with their customs and practices… Cullen had never seen her like this, in her element of the wild forests. It was heartwarming to see her so at peace with her people and also a little disorienting, as he found himself slightly not recognizing the bold and untamed woman that stood before him.
Later that night, Ellana and Cullen began walking back to their tent. They had remained at the fire long after dinner was over, as this was their last evening in the Dalish camp; tomorrow, they would return to meet Cassandra and Alistair in the Inn. Ellana felt a hand reach out and grab her arm. She turned around and found Keeper Deshanna standing before her with a grave look on her face.
"Deshanna," Ellana softly spoke, "Is everything okay?"
"You're going to Cumberland." Deshanna spoke with nerves in her voice, "I saw it in a dream last evening. You are traveling to the Circle in Nevarra, not the main city for trade."
Ellana's eyes flickered with shock and she quickly turned to Cullen, telling him to continue and that she would meet him in the tent shortly. She turned back to Deshanna, "Yes, I am… why would my travel intentions come to you in the Fade?" Ellana was concerned… Deshanna had received warnings from the spirit world while dreaming a few times throughout the years, but it was always connected to something that would bring imminent danger to the clan – never for something like this.
Deshanna looked deeply troubled and remained silent for a few moments before finally answering. "They urge me to tell you the truth, before you find it in Cumberland for yourself."
I'll be going a little of canon for this next part, because there is a really interesting character that I want to bring into my story. If you haven't watched the Dawn of the Seeker movie – I highly recommend it! Although it's definitely not a requirement for you to understand the next part of the story (or the character I'll be incorporating), it's just a cool movie and will give you some additional background. Yay, I hope you'll enjoy!