Zephyr had spent the whole of winter preparing for the coming of spring. From building up his weapons stalk pile to fortifying his domain and farming lifeforce, Zephyr was ready to wage war once more. And better yet, the slave girls that Zephyr had allowed his horde to use as they pleased had just given birth to the first generation of natural-born minions. And to Zephyr's shock and horror, there were even female minions among the newborn. Gnarl assured him that such a thing was perfectly natural, but it still disturbed Zephyr for some reason. Impella at least was free to join Zephyr now that she had given birth at least. But before Zephyr could even formulate a conquest plan against the Heartlands, Gnarl had some shocking news to share.

"Sire, there seems to be a surge of evil energy coming from the Mellow Hills! Your peasants are being drawn towards it!"

"Aw hell! What kinda bull shit is going on there this time!?" Zephyr assembled a full horde of minions and went to investigate. When he arrived in the outskirts of town, he found three villagers gawking at what looked like a heavenly portal.

"The gods have surely smiled upon us lowly peons!"

"They have given us a way to escape our dark overlord. It must be a passage... A passage to heaven."

"Do we get wings? I want wings! Do they have wings? Oh, I hope they have wings."

"Come on, let us be free from this sheep-killing, pumpkin smashing overlord!"

"The overlord can grow his own bloody food... I'm going to where there's a halo with my name on it!"

"And wing! Don't forget wings!" Zephyr was a little on edge. A portal to heaven popping up in the middle of his domain could only mean bad news for him. It was at this time that Gnarl decided to make his unwelcome presence known.

"I had some wings once... Gave me a rash. However, sire, you have an evil domain to uphold. You can't just let your subjects wander off. It's bad for your image! Find out where they're going and stop them!"

"Never killed an angle before, might be the kinda fun I'm looking for." Zephyr said as he walked into the heavenly portal, soon beholding a rather odd sight. One of the villagers that escaped into the gate was skipping and dancing to what looked like the geats of heaven, only to knock over the cardboard cut out it really was. Stepping over the fool, Zephyr got a better look at the hellscape he was in. Blood-red skies match the blood-red grass popping up from the jagged black rocks that made up the ground as far as the eye could see.

"It appears that this place isn't so heavenly after all."

"No shit, Gnarl. Well, killing an angle wasn't a dream I was dead set on anyhow." Zephyr and his merry band of minions walked deeper into the strange place, taking in the sights and sounds with more calm than the poor villagers that instantly regretted coming there. While descending deeper into the pit, skeletal warriors popped up from the ground and attacked.

"Those creatures you see are wraths, spirits of the evil dead... In fact I think I see a few old drinking chums. Hello!" Zephyr quickly chopped his way through the vile things but found that it was at least a little challenging before moving on.

"Something very powerful must have opened this rift into their world. Still, we can't have evil abysses cropping up anywhere they like threatening your evil domination! I remember when one appeared in the minion dung pile, gave Giblit quite a shock. No, no, no, can't have that! You must investigate further, sire."

"Agreed, the sooner I find the ass hole responsible for unleashing hell on earth, and either killing or recruiting him, the better." Zephyr soon found what looked like villagers digging up bones of some sort with picks.

"Oh, no! Not you! This really is hell!" One of the villagers screamed as he cowered before Zephyr.

"Wait, I remember you. You're the militiamen that I executed for treason. Good times, what ya digging for?"

"There are fallen wraths here. Their Infurnium armor is good for a break from torture."

"Really? Recycling that big of an industry in hell?"

"Turns out, ya."

"Fascinating. Well, I better let you guys get to it then." Zephyr left the grumbling condemned soles to their eternal struggling and moved on. Soon enough, he came across what he could only assume was halfling hell. The man-eating pumpkins and exploding sheep tormenting halflings was the dead giveaway to that conclusion. And as he hacked and slashed his way through, the abys started to look more and more like the halfling homes, and to no one's surprise, a familiar face was seen stuffing itself.

"It's the tormented spirit of Melvin, sire. Looks like he's getting all the food he could have ever wished for down here! All that flesh, wabbling from side to side... It's so hypnotic. Ooohh, this should be interesting..." Gnarl said as Melvin then started to bubble and giggle all over before suddenly exploding. Amusing the elderly minion to no end.

"That's a way to end a meal! Oh! There he goes again! Blowing up and reincarnating like that must hurt like hell! But look at him! Melvin just can't seem to stop himself!"

"I'm glad that you find his suffering so amusing. Now let's continue on. The sooner we find who opened the rift, the better." Sneaking past the ever exploding halfling, Zephyr and his merry band of minions soon came across what looked like a giant pumpkin with a goofy face, laughing and spitting.

"That's what's been spawning those pumpkins! Be careful, sire, that's one big mother!"

"Gnarl, I've killed things that make this pumpkin bitch look like a strawberry in comparison. I think we got this." And soon enough, Zephyr slaughtered all of the man-eating pumpkins but soon found his path blocked by a wall.

"Can't smash our way through, Gnarl, have some bombs brought through the rift."

"Hmmm, lord, that wobbly ball of lard might prove handy here. That is if you can make use of his fatal bouts of indigestion."

"Would be the first time I would ever call Melvin Underbelly useful for anything, but might be good for a laugh." Zephyr then laid out a trail of food for Melvin to munch his way down, predictably bursting productively. The exploding lard-ass had cleared a path to a wheel, turning it turned off a cooking pit that was blocking his way. With that out of his way, Zephyr explored further, finding many condemned halfling cooks.

"They must be preparing Melvin's eternal feast. Damnation is busy work!" Zephyr took a moment to see some condemned soles hanging from the wall like prised cafes.

"They're going to eat me! Don't let them eat me, sire! Oh, I thought Ide escaped Melvin, but he's down here too!"

"Vow to serve me in death as you did in life, and I could see what I can do about that."

"Anything is better than being cooked up for that... THING!" Zephyr then cut the poor man down and the other two as well.

"Now, move the food from that plate over to the next one. I want Melvin to explode next to that wall." The free peasants did as they were told, and sure enough, when Melvin walked through, he exploded where he needed to.

"Excellent work, boys. Spread the word to the other condemned, freedom from torcher, if they obey me."

"As you command, sire!" The villager said as he ran off. As Zephyr continued hacking and slashing his way through wraths and pumpkins, he came across something rather odd.

"What's that, sire? It looks like a piece of the forge. Ah, of course, it's a mold! This will allow you to create a unique item in your forge, sire. Won't that be nice?"

"Only if the weapon turns out to be worth a dame... Oh, I think I made a funny. HA!" Zephyr then willed his minions to bring the mold to the nearest waypoint gate. The moment it was back at the tower, Gnarl made himself useful by explaining what it was good for.

"Oh, it's a mold for the ax of confusion, my lord. Strike with this, and you'll have an extra chance of spreading a little extra panic and mayhem amongst the enemy."

"What a lovely toy. Once I'm done in here, I'll have a word with Giblet about arming a few of my knights with them." Zephyr continued his march into hell but did not take long in finding trouble in the form of a hungry halfling hero.

"He's charging, sire... Must think your food!" Zephyr had to jump out of the way of the rolling Melvin, who, funny enough, bounced off of the walls just right to explode next to another barricade. The next obstacle in his path was a similar puzzle, getting Melvin to roll in a way to break down a barrier. That was easy enough, but what was pissing off Zephyr the most was the pinball challenge. Having to maneuver a cart of food so he could use Melvin to smash open barriers holding spokes to a wheel was much harder than it looked.

"You know what, fuck this shit! Gnarl, have the succubi fly some bombs down here and blast that fucking door open!" Soon enough, all four of the lovely ladies descended from the sky like angels of death and pain, bringing explosive judgment upon the doors of hell. Once the way was clear, they joined Zephyr on the last leg of his journey. They then beheld a glowing thing that pulsed and twitched with evil might.

"So ladies, mind telling me what that thing is?"

"That is an abys stone, sire. Claim it, and this infernal abyss will belong to you. Imagine that, a level of hell under human management. The boss won't like that, I'm sure!"

"And who is that, may I ask?"

"The forgotten god, he rules the Infernal Abyss. Surprised you don't know about him, but then again, mortals do have that tendency to forget things like that."

"So, if I claim that stone and this hell pit. I would be openly challenging the authority of a god?"

"More or less, ya." Zephyr thought long and hard about what he should do next, but in the end, there really was only one option.

"Welp, this might be a sin, but if I'm going to die, might as well be at the hands of a god. Nab that stone, boys!" The minions then rushed to joyfully carry out their master's command. But then, the unexpected happened. A massive mob of peasants rushed the stone to destroy it.

"HAY! What the fuck do you freaks think your doing!?" Zephyr yelled at the top of his lungs, slightly startling the peasants.

"Like hell are we going to put with your shit in death as well as life! You can't even kill us down here, just slow us down!"

"Trust me, peasant, you will wish you can die soon!" Zephyr then started blasting the angry mob with lighting, inferno, and all of his other crowd control spells. But as soon as they die, they reincarnate and get right back to attacking. But after about half an hour of this, it became blindingly clear that the peasants had no chance of actually stopping him and gave up. Scattering like roaches before his might. Zephyr then got the abyss to the nearest waypoint gate and claimed his prize.

"The Mellow Hills Abyss is yours, dark master! Please don't try to bring it back to the tower... Giblet is already getting nasty flashbacks!"

"I will do my best." Zephyr said as he returned to his tower, satisfied with a job well done.

((It's the beginning of the end! Hope you all have had as big of a blast reading as I had writing this bullshit! This will be your last opportunity to give your opinions on what should happen in the story, if you feel so inclined. Have a wonderful life my little goblins!))