The week before Christmas Owen and Nikki walked into the coffee shop where they were to meet Max McRae.
"Moms not thrilled," Nikki said.
"But she knows I'm here," Owen said.
"Meg is babysitting," Nikki said.
"How are you doing with motherhood," Owen asked.
"It feels right," Nikki said, "I love Ty. How's having three?"
"What I always wanted," Owen said.
"Do you think Meg and Nathan will have another," Nikki asked.
"Maybe," Owen replied, "her injuries I don't know. And if you're 25 she's 39 it's not young. What about you?"
"With someone who loves me and loves Ty I would consider it but not on my own again," Nikki said, "I'm pretty sure mom was getting really frustrated with me and my whining."
"She just wanted to make sure you were okay," Owen said.
"I was," Nikki said.
"That's Max," Owen pointed out.
"Do I look okay," Nikki asked.
"You do," Owen said.
"Don't leave me," Nikki said.
"I won't," Owen agreed.
"Owen," Max said walking over.
"Max," Owen said, "this is Nicole."
"It's nice to meet you," Nikki said reaching to shake his hand.
"Your Nicole," Max said, "but you were a baby."
"I am," Nikki replied, "I grew up."
"Let's get coffee and have a seat," Owen suggested, "Nikki do you want to find a table and I'll get your tea? Decaf tea milk and honey?"
"Sounds good," Nikki replied.
"You know her coffee order," Max said.
"I know both my sisters' coffee orders," Owen said.
"Both," Max said, "you and Meghan are still close?"
"We all are," Owen said.
"So what are you doing," Max asked.
"Still running trauma surgery at Grey Sloan," Owen said, "I've been married 6 years and have three kids."
"Nicole is she married," Max asked, "kids?"
"Ask her but she has a son," Owen said, "Tyler is 8 months."
"Her husband," Max asked.
"Did what you did," Owen said, "walked when they found out."
"So her coffee," Max asked.
"Decaf tea with milk and honey," Owen said, "I've got it I know how she likes it. It's the same as my wife's."
"They close." Max asked
"Nikki calls Teddy her big sister," Owen said.
Owen ordered Nikkis tea and his coffee.
"Nicole what do you do," Max asked.
"I teach sixth grade math," Nikki answered, "you?"
"Plumbing," Max replied, "have you taught long?"
"It's my third year," Nikki answered.
"What sort of training is it to teach," Max asked.
"I have a bachelors of science in math and physics, a bachelor of education in middle and secondary, and a postgraduate certificate in math education," Nikki replied, "I'm working on a masters of education in leadership in math education."
"Your boyfriend must be supportive," Max commented.
"Nothing super serious right now," Nikki replied, "I'm busy."
"Your masters must be hectic," Max said.
"That and my son is eight months," Nikki replied.
"I have a grandson," Max said, "what's his name?"
"Tyler," Nikki replied, "but I'm Really cautious who he meets. I haven't seen you since I was five months old."
"Is he with his dad," Max asked.
"Meghan is babysitting today," Nikki replied, "his dad isn't around like you weren't."
"I wasn't in a good headspace," Max said, "I was a drinker. I'm an alcoholic in recovery but by the time I realized it and accepted help you would have been 12 and it was too late."
"Do I have other half siblings," Nikki asked.
"You have two sisters," Max said, "they don't know they have a big sister. Grace is 11 and Breanna is 9."
"Where are they going to school," Nikki asked.
"Grace is in sixth at Roosevelt and Breanna is a wolf creek," Max said, "where do you teach?"
"I'm at Blue Pine," Nikki answered, "Roosevelt is a good school. I don't know much about wolf creek."
"Both girls liked wolf creek," Max said.
"Does their mom know," Nikki asked.
"She does. Shannon knows and that this is the first time I'm seeing you," Max said.
"Did you ever try," Nikki asked.
"No," Max admitted, "after what happened with your mom and the way that ended I couldn't."
"I was your daughter," Nikki said, "did you ever wonder?"
"I was a drunk," Max said, "I was so drunk for so long I didn't know which way was up. Nicole I regret it I should have reached out to your mom and tried to connect with you sooner."
"Twenty five years," Nikki said.
"And you look so much like your mom," Max said.
"I'm not looking for a relationship Max," Nikki said, "I've gone 25 years with out a dad."
"If you ever get married," Max said.
"Owen." Nikki replied, "I have four amazing older siblings who helped raise me. Owen and Meghan their spouses. I have two big brothers and two big sisters. I'm 14-18 years younger than them and they've all helped shape me."
"Then why did you want to see me," Max asked.
"I wanted a face to put to the name and any family medical history for Tyler's sake," Nikki said.
"My dad had a stroke in his 90s but that's it," Max said, "Nicole I would like to keep emailing."
"I don't know Max," Nikki said, "I have enough on my plate right now that I don't know how much I want to be connected. I have two sisters I've never met that don't know I exist. How would they feel? I work with that age group."
"I didn't want to explain to them why they don't know you why I don't know you," Max said, "my past is full of regrets not trying to know you as a child is one of them."
"Your embarrassed that I exist," Nikki said, "I'm an embarrassment to you. I don't want to be around people who are embarrassed that their my parent. You've never acted like my parent. I think the best term I could use for you is sperm donor."
"What," Max replied.
"You chose not to be my father," Nikki said, "you chose to walk away from your child. I have a son I could never turn my back on him the way you turned your back on me."
"Sperm donor," Max said m, "where did that come from?"
"That's the role you played in my life," Nikki said.
"I think what Nikki is trying to say is that it's too little too late Max," Owen said, "had you tried when she was twelve and you got sober maybe she would be more forgiving now. But you don't know what we've been through in the last ten years let alone the last twenty five. I was absent from Nikkis log for years because of my education and my service with the army so was Meghan but we always had as much contact as we could. My wife, meghans fiancé they both have known Nikki since she was young. You knew Nathan Riggs Nikkis known Nathan since she was a baby. My wife Teddy I think Nikki was 9 or 10 the first time I brought Teddy home."
"How can you say your siblings and their spouses helped raise you," Max asked.
"Because they did," Nikki said, "it was Owen and Teddy who helped me pick a major and apply for teacher training. When I did my global service semester in Kenya I went with Nathan. Meghan helped me figure out raising my son on my own and to see my own strength and self worth. My sisters saw me for who I am and encouraged me every day. My brothers helped me find my strength and use it. You sit there feigning interest and remorse but I don't believe it."
"I don't know you," Max said.
"I don't think you'll get to," Nikki said.
"That's it," Max said.
"That's it," Nikki stated, "we should get home my son should be up from his nap soon and I want to take him for some fresh air before it's too dark."
"It was good to meet you," Max said.
"It was good to see you," Nikki agreed standing up and grabbing her coat.
They all shook hands and left.
In Owens truck Nikki said, "it's like seeing Jeff 25 years from now."
"You okay," Owen asked.
"Maybe," Nikki admitted, "I expected some warmth or care. I don't know maybe I hoped he wanted to see me."
"I'm sorry," Owen said, "did you mean it about your siblings helping raise you?"
"I did," Nikki said, "I wouldn't have gone to college without you and Teddy. I probably wouldn't have figured out I like teaching if you hadn't found me those babysitting jobs with dr Bailey and dr Robbins."
"I didn't realize," Owen said.
"I hadn't tried to put it in words before today," Nikki said, "it used to drive Jeff insane."
"We're always going to be here," Owen said.
"I know," Nikki agreed.
They pulled into the driveway and Nikki went straight downstairs taking a crying Tyler from Meghan.
"I'll feed him," Nikki said, "don't bother with a bottle."
"Are you okay," Meghan asked.
"I need a few minutes and some baby cuddles," Nikki said carrying Tyler into her room.
Meghan wandered upstairs, "how did it go?"
"He was cold and distant," Owen said, "but she needed to see for herself. She got her questioned answered."
"Anything interesting," Meghan asked.
"Two more siblings," Owen said, "nine and eleven. They don't know Nikki exists."
"Ouch," Teddy said, "is Nikki okay?"
"She asked for time," Meghan said.
"Just let her think," Teddy said, "she'll come find who she wants when she's ready. It could be any of us or mom."
"He made choices," Owen said.
"We all lost a dad or parents that knew as loved us," Meghan said, "Abdul never loved me but I would never tell Faroke that. Nikki just found out he never wanted her or cared about mom."
"We knew that," Owen said.
"But she's just found out that she's repeating the cycle," Meghan said, "having a child with and being abandoned by a man who from everyone know was an ass at the best. She was abandoned by the father of her child the same way her sperm donor abandoned her."
"That's got to mess with your head," Teddy said.
"I'm surprised she doesn't have more trauma," Meghan said.
"I mentioned it to her after Jeff left," Teddy said, "there were some behavior patterns that could have been PTSD or hormonal we don't know. She denied trauma. Saying she hadn't done anything to be traumatized by. That she had shit happened but it wasn't trauma."
"Her dad, the accident, Jeff," Owen said.
"Me," Meghan said.
"She won't acknowledge it," Teddy said, "she said trauma was for soldiers or kids that had been abused not her. She grew up with a mom and siblings that love her. Evelyn did everything she could to make sure all of you could follow your dreams. She stayed in the same house until she chose to move out when she was 19."
"Her accident," Owen said, "that alone. Watching your best friend die beside you."
"Losing siblings to war," Teddy said.
"Did she get any help after I was captured," Meghan asked.
"She was part of a group for teens that lost loved ones to war," Owen said, "we found it for her. She met Julie, Bryn and Kendra there."
"I've seen them around," Meghan said.
"They've been friends since they were 16 or 17," Teddy said, "I like them."
"She works with Julie," Owen said.
"Let's drop it for now," Teddy said, "unless she wants to talk about it we'll get nowhere. It's Nikki she will talk to who she wants when she wants."
"She will," Owen agreed.
"I need to do some Christmas shopping," Meghan said, "Faroke's first christmas."
"All of the boy's first christmas," Teddy beamed.
"We take all five kids for Santa pictures tonight," Meghan said.
"Matching outfits," Teddy said, "our girls have the same dress."
"Faroke's sweater is the same colour as the girls dresses," Meghan said.
"The babies have the same sweater in the same shade of red," Teddy smiled.
"Mom is going to love it," Meghan smiled.
"What's mom going to love," Nikki asked, walking into the kitchen with a babbling Tyler on her hip.
"The Santa picture," Owen said.
"Does she have one of the three of us," Nikki asked.
"We're doing it," Meghan said, "there's one of Nikki and I and a few of Owen and I but none of the three of us."
"What do we wear," Nikki asked.
"Owen do you have a green shirt," Meghan asked.
"I do," Owen said.
"Nikki you have that cute green dress you wore to school this week, I have a top in the same green," Meghan said.
"He has one the same green as Nikki's dress," Teddy said, "the three of you have to. Evelyn will lose her mind."
"Mom's going to love it," Nikki said.
"She will," Meghan agreed.
"We're really taking a picture with Santa," Owen asked.
"We are Eeyore," Meghan replied.
"Come on Owl," Nikki pleaded, "for me."
"Fine," Owen said.
"Should we do all of us with the kids," Nikki suggested.
"That would be a lot of us," Owen said.
"Just ten," Nikki said, "lets do it and frame it for mom."
"Who is doing the framing," Meghan asked.
"One of you," Nikki said, "or we take it to Michales."
"I'll find Nate's green shirt," Meghan said, 'or pick up one when Faroke and I finish Christmas shopping."
"It's been a lot of shopping this year," Teddy agreed, "three kids."
"Fun to do the kid stuff," Nikki smiled, "I may have gone overboard for Ty's first christmas."
"He won't remember this one," Teddy said.
"But I will and it's going to be perfect," Nikki replied.
"We should get organized," Teddy said, "I have two little girls hair to wash and curl."
"We're getting dressed at the last possible minute," Nikki said, "but he does need a bath."
"We have about 3 hours before we have to leave," Teddy said.
"We'll go do our thing," Nikki agreed, "meet you at Santa's workshop."
"See you there," Owen agreed.