1936 Present
"After that our relationship changed entirely." Natsu said to Lucy. "Erza was still a hard ass to us but after she realized that we had feelings and standards, that we were not completely evil she decided to show us some compassion. Saving her life didn't hurt either."
"So that's how Laxus's father really died." Lucy said. "We were all told he had been killed by an explosion that took place in one of the factories he owned."
"Well if Makarov told the truth everybody would have thought he was insane. Remember our organization is a secret."
But did Laxus ever know the truth? Did Makarov ever tell him?"
"He planned to once Laxus was older and could better understand the circumstances but unfortunately Laxus admired Ivan and saw him as a role model. Poor Makarov felt that the truth would break his heart."
"But does he really think letting him believe a lie like that for all his life is wise?"
"Probably not but that's the thing about parental figures, they'll do anything to protect the kids they care about from getting hurt. Even lie and keep secrets. That's what Vahan did with Gray."
"Who's Vahan?"
"Vahan was an Armenian priest and exorcist, he was also the man who essentially raised me and Gray. He took me in when I was six, after I lost my parents and he had been looking after Gray since he was a baby. He knew what Gray was from moment he was born but he didn't show any signs of being a devil so Vahan felt it best to with hold bits of information regarding Gray's origins."
"So he never told Gray he was a devil?"
"Not until he and I got into that big fight when we were adults and it triggered his dormant devil side to...To...Wake up, I guess? Anyway once black markings showed up on Gray's body and he sprouted wings, horns, and claws, Vahan couldn't hide the truth any longer. He didn't mean any harm by not telling Gray, he just didn't want Gray to hate himself and in all honesty I can't really blame him for his actions."
"I don't think secrets and lies help anyone."
"Maybe, maybe not. Lies are bad and to tell you the truth I'd much prefer a terrible truth over a wonderful lie but not all people have that preference. Which reminds me, you can't ever tell Laxus about how Ivan really died. If anyone besides Makarov tells him the truth I guarantee it'll hurt him more than anything."
"I won't tell but there's something that's puzzling me."
"What?"
"You and Gray want to destroy each other right?"
"Yes."
"But judging by what you've just told me about this Vahan person, it seems that you and Gray grew up together."
"We did."
"Then how?"
"How what?"
"How could you want to kill someone you grew up with? Someone who's basically your family?"
"Easy. He betrayed me."
"How?"
"Well for starters he lead your grandpa right to me and that's how I got stuck in a coma for decades. But I guess it all goes back to Constantinople. He didn't support me when I...When I renounced God. He said that I was wrong to blame God for all the evil in the world. He always said that he'd be there for me but as soon as I decided to turn against that great heavenly hypocrite, he refused to stand by me."
"I see." Lucy said. "So you really do hate God."
"Yes and if you're going to lecture me about it-"
"I'm not but I think you're in the wrong about Gray's betrayal."
"What do you mean?"
"You chose to hate God. That was your decision and your choice. But not Gray's."
"We were friends, family, we were supposed to be there for each other."
"Be there for each other yes, but always agree with each other? That's not how relationships work and of course he couldn't support you. You had turned yourself into a creature that fed on human blood. You were asking him to support basically cannibalism."
"That part I now understand was a mistake but I'm referring to his faith. He didn't consider my feelings or my pain. He chose his faith over me."
"And that surprises you?"
"Uh...Yes."
"It surprises you that because of your hatred, Gray did not automatically go against everything he believed? Everything he ever knew and was ever taught? You expected him to just risk his soul and give up his entire faith based on your say so? You think it would be that easy for him?"
Natsu went quiet for a moment as he pondered Lucy's words carefully.
"Well when you put it like that it...It...It-"
"It makes you sound rather selfish doesn't it? You say he doesn't consider your feelings or your pain, but do you consider his? Religion isn't just faith, it's part of who a person is. What do you think Gray must've been feeling when you gave him that ultimatum? Forcing him to choose between someone he loved and who he really was? Tell me, did any of what I just said ever cross your mind?"
Natsu thought for a moment. Now that Lucy had mentioned it, he never did consider Gray's feelings on the whole falling out between them. He had just been so angry about the torture he suffered during the war and about how what he believed to be God ignoring his cries, that when Gray just out right refused to join him in his renunciation he got it in his head that Gray didn't really care. That the torment he suffered meant nothing to him. But looking back on it now he considered that maybe he had asked too much of him that day. Then he remembered something Gray had said to him that day.
"You expect me to support my brother damning himself?!"
When Natsu had heard it the first time he took it the wrong way. He thought Gray was judging him when he said that but now that he had really taken the time to think about it. To remember the terror and hurt he had seen in Gray's eyes as he said those words, he now understood the true meaning of the phrase. He didn't judge Natsu, he was afraid for him. Afraid for his soul. It gave him a new perspective on things.
"No." Natsu finally spoke. "I never did consider his feelings about it. About all of it. I...I was just so angry and...Oh...Oh no...What the hell did I do?"
"Maybe you can fix it." Lucy said. "Talk to him. Try to sort this out."
"Won't do any good."
"Why not?"
"Because he believed I betrayed him."
"With the ultimatum involving his faith?"
"No. Not that. Something else."
"What?"
He hesitated before answering and made sure that no one was around to hear him.
"I can't tell you the whole details about this because Gray would go berserk if anyone knew and I don't know why I'm telling you this because not even Erza knows this but for some reason I trust you. So promise me you'll never tell anyone this."
"I promise."
"About a century or some decades after I became a vampire, I met up with Gray again. I tired to again convince him to join in the renunciation but as expected he refused. We fought, I left, then he suffered a terrible tragedy and he blamed me for it."
"Why you?"
"Before I left I swore to him that one way or another I'd get him to see how horrible God really was. That one day he'd suffer through something and God would ignore his cries for help. So when he did suffer tragedy and his prayers were not answered as I correctly predicted, he was convinced that I was at fault. Vowed that he'd never forgive me and that is what officially destroyed any care he had toward me. Also that's why he aided your grandfather."
"What exactly does he think you did?"
He turned away from her, again he went quiet and seemed very reluctant to answer.
"I guess that's enough personal talk for now." Lucy said. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. You've already told me so much and I promise I won't tell anyone what I know."
He didn't say anything. Lucy decided to leave him alone to enjoy his meal in peace. She didn't expect him say another word until they met again but the very moment she walked out the door to his room, she heard him say in a very sympathetic voice:
"He thinks I orchestrated the murder of the woman he loved."
Lucy stopped and looked back at him. He still didn't face her.
"That's all I'll say about it for now and I admit I did hate him very much back then. I admit that I did want him to pay for choosing God over me but not like that. Despite the anger and betrayal I felt I still couldn't bring myself to do something that horrible to him."
Note: Gray is a devil. Not the devil. Meaning he's not Satan or Lucifer. In this fic devils are a species not one person.