For purposes of timeline reference in this story, Bellatrix 7th year at Hogwarts was in 1969-1970
Another rounds with Bella
Chapter 33 - Year 2005 – 4th Seventh of May
Continuation
"I will come back for it… when I'm finally with the person I'm meant to be— who is not you…"
For a moment, Minerva was surprised to see Bellatrix's dark eyes that are normally cordial to her had become severe and stony. All at once, it introduced Minerva to the pureblood lineage. And before she could utter a response, Bellatrix dismissed their conversation.
"Good day, Professor. And again, may you have many returns."
Did Bellatrix ever come back for the bracelet?
That, of course, is an obvious question. And certainly not the only one demanding to be answered amongst crucial concerns from the recent account made by Minerva McGonagall.
For every answer offered, much more questions are generated; such paradox could not be truer at the moment for Hermione. She is indeed bursting with queries, for she has many new issues despite a lot of confirmation from this chapter of Minerva's past.
"Albus was very concern with the clear rejection I've handed Bellatrix. However, he conceded that I could not indulge her, nor could I blatantly deny the things that Bellatrix had expressed, in reference to my private life. As either way would only have me compromised."
Minerva returned to her chronicle. Hermione realised that the older witch is essentially doing what exactly she had set when she opened their discussion, and that is to completely address this subject, the subject of her relation to Bellatrix.
Minerva proceeded to speak of the following weeks—months after that Saturday morning in October…
Of how Bellatrix went about her ways as diligently in all her NEWTS classes, if not more resolute to impress everyone, particularly with the maturation of her magical skills. Of how a very boastful Horace Slughorn was often heard in the staff room blathering about his precious Slytherin-Pureblood perfectly brewed potion in his class. Including how Bellatrix has excellent and excessive ingredients, which are always available to supply any of her fellow students when they would find themselves re-doing or practicing for their potion lessons.
Many of Bellatrix's current Professors were indeed vocal of their approvals regarding her schoolwork. They highly noted the vast difference of such student during her first four years at Hogwarts. Minerva would always get a subtle look from Albus during these discussions amongst Professors. And she would be tight-lipped, as she would struggle. She would like to be the proud teacher that she is for Bellatrix's consistent excellence in her class, whether on written assignments or transfiguration exercise. On one hand, have this heavy apprehension of the motivation behind these exertions.
Moreover, the eldest Black from the Slytherin house began charming her way around her fellow students from different levels and different houses. Suspicion from her peers was initially conveyed, but she ignored it, and dismissed their accusation that she is setting them up for something wicked…
The Ravenclaws are smart enough to accept the generosity. And the Hufflepuffs are generally delighted for the display of diplomacy. And then after acknowledging that despite her much advanced skills, none of it had been turned against any Gryffindors, the house of the Brave gave their nod and be gallant about it.
Lastly and most importantly, although it was never discussed amongst the student body, it was unmistakable that Bellatrix was remaining silent on issue of the mounting political turmoil outside of Hogwarts, this in effect is keeping them all in truce.
But after Christmas break, when all students had returned to the castle, it was beginning of something tumultuous. Bellatrix had not attended her transfiguration classes, but seemingly fine attending all her other NEWT level classes.
During the end of the first week, Minerva asked Horace about it, but the foolish Professor could only jest how the Head of Gryffindor House is making it up, or making a big deal out of it. Another week passed and Bellatrix Black had neither showed up to her Transfiguration class, nor reported at McGonagall's office after being summoned. Hence, Minerva had enough and ordered the Slytherin's House Prefect to escort the absentee Bellatrix to her office…
. . . . . . .
"Good evening, Professor. Apology for being late, I had to…" The Slytherin Prefect paused, and Minerva silently watched the student shoot a dagger look at his housemate, Bellatrix Black, before he decided not to continue with his words.
"Thank you for finding Miss Black for me," Minerva interjected, "You may return to your dormitory."
The Prefect immediately followed her instructions after giving a courteous nod. The office door softly closed behind him, and the cold climate in January was seeping into Minerva's bones just as she was observing the impassiveness on Bellatrix. The student remained wordless and standing in front of her office desk, seemed looking at a spot somewhere on the wall behind Minerva.
"Why haven't you attended my class, Miss Black?" Minerva gently inquired, as she made slow movement to steeple her fingers on top of her desk, "And why did you ignore my note to see me, which I've sent a week ago?"
"I apologise for the inconvenience, Professor. I've lost track of time since coming back. And I've been meaning to submit my formal notice that I will no longer continue Transfiguration."
Bellatrix pulled out a parchment from one of her dress' pockets and magically placed them on the desk; of course Minerva did not miss the wandless and wordless manner it had been done. But she disregarded the flaunted magic, and ignored the parchment. She leaned back in her chair as she pondered the flimsy excuse that her student just gave.
"What happened?" Minerva cautiously inquired.
"I have decided to pursue Potions and Defense as my priority. I fear that to concentrate on them I do not have the time anymore to deliver the excellence needed in your class." Bellatrix replied stoically, and she remained unwilling to look at her Professor in the eyes.
Minerva silently attempted to read her student before she stood up and made her way around that brought her less than three feet from where Bellatrix has been standing. Leaning her hip against her desk, she waited for Bellatrix to volunteer the truth, and when it seems that it won't transpire, Minerva went for another approach.
"I had the notion that we had understanding regarding honesty between us."
"I am not lying, Professor…"
"We've also did establish how intelligent you are, thus I am certain you know that while you are not outright telling me lies, we both know that you are not being truthful as well."
"It matters not, after all." Bellatrix mumbled under breath, but it was clear enough for Minerva to hear.
"Why don't you tell me and permit me to be the judge of it?" Minerva lightly challenged.
"I know that you think you care, but it won't matter." Bellatrix returned suddenly exasperated. But her dark eyes that finally met Minerva's emerald eyes were pleading for something...
"You do not trust that I truly care?" Minerva inclined her head in incomprehension, and inauspiciously failed to filter her thoughts when she added, "Perhaps, not in the manner you wanted—"
"If you do not believe in romantic love, why were you with that woman in Paris?" Bellatrix blurted in heightened vexation, which abreast Minerva that she did commit a mistake with her negligent words.
"I do not need to answer that." Minerva stated calmly. And internally assessed her patience reservoir, hoping that it will be adequate given the sudden wild direction taken by Bellatrix. "You know that it far outside your liberty to ask your Profess—"
"Is she even a witch?" Bellatrix flat out interrupted. And then furiously fired her palpable objection, "Because if she is not a witch, the bloody hell I cannot come up with an excuse why Minerva McGonagall was willing to be with that woman! And not even consider someone like me?"
"Please, Bella, we've discussed this. Someday, you will find someone who—"
"In the first place, why do let a mere Muggle touch you—"
"That is enough, Bella…" Minerva clenched her jaw in an effort to contain her temper.
Minerva tried, tried so hard to hold-in the massive indignation. She focused at the knowledge that she is delicately conversing with a student— the very one that Albus Dumbledore had warned about, with all the underlying notions attached…
The words spat to her and the implied prejudice on non-magical folks are violently ringing in her ears. But she gathered her brewing emotions, as it will not do to give in to vehemence… And Minerva almost won over them; but alas, Bellatrix imprudently pushed with nastier assaults.
"Perhaps, she was just a fuck!"
The flagrant crassness was as though Minerva had been attacked with a stunning spell. It knocked the wind out of her and momentarily shut down her ability to immediately retort, which presented Bellatrix another chance to deliver a blow.
"I could be a fuck for you, Minerva. If that's—"
"ONE MORE WORD…" Minerva roared. The slam of her hand against the surface of her desk sent the nearest items to the floor. She ignored the mess and turned a blazing look at Bellatrix's face. With severity that no doubt could reduce anyone into total silence, she warned, "AND YOU WILL BE INTRODUCED WITH WHOM YOU ARE PRECISELY TALKING TO!"
For the second time in almost seven years that Minerva McGonagall has known Bellatrix, she was treated with the hard and cold stare from the young woman's dark eyes. The proud and offensive regard only fuelled her rage, and she had to force herself not to magically or physically slam the juvenile witch across the room. When she sensed that Bellatrix was about to utter another onslaught, she decided to finally slash such insolence.
"Miss Black, let us not demonstrate how a so-called potential magical power is infantile against mine..." As opposed to her earlier loud reprove, an almost inaudible and yet even more ominous censure came out of Minerva. "Against nearly 40 years of experience."
The looming message with the unexpected contradiction in its delivery had Bellatrix involuntarily step back. But testament to her pureblood upbringing; she immediately drew herself straighter and strike back.
"Did you just threaten me, Professor McGonagall?"
Minerva knew that she has to be absolutely careful, and clever. She is indeed toeing a dangerous edge after what she just last said to a student. No matter how vulgar Bellatrix had been, Minerva fiercely repeated in her head that she is the bloody adult between them, and the bloody Professor, and she can be fired for failing to act as one.
"It is not my habit to threaten, Miss Black." Minerva responded, oh so casually, entirely withdrawing the menacing tone, and then flicking unseen lint from her robes. "Perhaps, I'm merely in the sudden mood to reminisce how even at 14 years old, my power could stand on its own… And much more seasoned wizards and witches, the likes of Albus Dumbledore had stood bear witness to it."
Minerva knew that she has entered some sort of gamble, which admittedly she did not thoroughly process beforehand. But with the uncertainty flashing across Bellatrix's face, Minerva knew that she had achieved part of her desired result… That is to hammer an important message to Bellatrix… To serve the girl/young woman a dire warning, but without actually saying one...
"As far as I am concern," Minerva added in the same off-handed tone, "I merely hurled facts about my ability… versus that of— untrained one… Even such is perceived as naturally talented."
"We both know that I am growing far superior at my age that none of current students here can match." Bellatrix furiously retorted. Her hands balled tighter and she hissed to Minerva McGonagall, "IT IS JUST matter of time that I will learn much more and be considered really powerful… After all, I am a Black. Our family belonging to the sacred twenty eight—"
"Do you really think I care about the list of families mostly known for silly purist sentiments?" Minerva dryly chuckled. "And do you really think that becoming superior to your peers is the point of learning?"
Minerva dropped the seed of doubt just so evenly that Bellatrix was visibly struggling between absolute confusion and fury. When eventually the latter dimmed a little, Minerva elected to risk a slight taunt in order to drive her point graver.
"How utterly disappointing that a supposed intelligent mind was after all— superficial? How all the exhibited growth— did not include wisdom? Did not gain an iota of understanding that people are not defined by their material wealth, bloodline, or even if they are non-magical."
The remarks managed to remove another layer of fury on Bellatrix's face. This had Minerva mentally assessing that the delicate moment between her and the young witch can endure more pressure, hence she decided to further step on it.
"Only the true intelligent ones know that employing one's gifts, especially great magical powers, for the betterment of this world for all— is the very essence of superiority… That it is never for one's glory— because if so, that's tremendously a waste of intelligence…"
A defeat seemingly draped all over Bellatrix Black after hearing that. And even though Minerva's goal was indeed to make the young witch yield— Minerva was still stunned at such palpable resignation… And at the almost tangible emotional turmoil emitting from Bellatrix…
Minerva thought to leave the matter and be done with this student. However, she is aware of the lack of healthy influence on this girl/young woman's life, and how right now Minerva can implant some sort of learning that is beyond Transfiguration. Something that could bring Bellatrix to a place where she can truly decide for herself; of what she would value in life, particularly when she would be under paramount political and family pressure once she graduates from Hogwarts…
She made a swift calculation about making use of a more personal remark, and when she deemed it crucial, she looked straight into Bellatrix's eyes and gently stated, "Now, tell me, Bella, why would I want to be allied, to be personally associated, or be friends with someone who chooses hollow superiority?"
Similar to the meeting they had last October, as Bellatrix sank into utter silence, Minerva waited patiently, and hoped for a winning turn out for both of them.
After a while, Bellatrix reached some sort of realisation, a rough acceptance of what has been presented to her, and when she seems lost on how to proceed, Minerva took kindly.
In the same fashion of wandless and wordless magic, Minerva summoned Bellatrix's parchment from the floor, as it was one of the items that went flying when she banged her desk. She handed it back to Bellatrix who received it mechanically.
"Professor…" Bellatrix took in a deep breath, "Professor, I am truly sorry for the… insults… And if you want me expelled, I will accept without objec—"
"You are not expelled." Minerva benevolently interrupted. She summoned another parchment from one of the shelves behind her desk and also passed it to Bellatrix.
The young woman uncomprehendingly opened and scanned the second parchment and curiously looked up at Minerva who continued speaking, "The topics listed were the ones the class had tackled during your absence. Those written at the bottom are for the coming week I've instructed the students to prepare for."
"I am allowed to come back to your class?" Bellatrix confusingly asked.
"Your one and only chance… Also, first thing on Monday, I expect submission of every assignment you've missed the last two weeks be handed with quality of excellence requisite in my class," Minerva's no nonsense teacher persona responded, fully aware that she had referenced to Bellatrix's flimsy excuse to drop transfiguration. But after a beat, she commiserated, and offered smilingly, "If you have questions about the lessons, come see me tomorrow after lunchtime. Let us not waste such talent if we can help it."
That turn the atmosphere completely.
A look of pleased astonishment on Bellatrix had Minerva elected to indulge.
She jested a bit by deliberately steering towards her proposed assistance than her last remarks on the girl's talent. "It is not uncommon for teachers to help students, you know." She smiled again. It broadened the surprise countenance on Bellatrix, who seems to be faltering with any response.
For a moment, Minerva wondered if it would be all right for her to propose a window towards a genuine friendship or mentorship to Bellatrix. Of course, she hasn't forgotten that just few months ago, the girl has declared her feelings. But perhaps a good-intent compromise might pave to a more tranquil way of curbing such infatuations.
When she narrated to Albus of the gift-giving-bracelet incident, which had taken her by Christmas time to do so, two months after the fact, for some reason she hasn't figured out, the old coot suggested that perhaps it has been designed that she takes up the occasion to keep the girl at arms length. She was affronted at the implication of false leading, and told him so. But Albus clarified that to be romantically involved is never his meaning. But he cryptically concluded that their actions today with these young people could carry some light when time comes that dark forces start dominating.
Minerva is not entirely up-to-date of the exact depth of the political ongoing outside of Hogwarts. Not from lack of sources or interest, but at the moment, mostly because the trauma from the losses she experienced from Grindelwald's war has started stirring inside her at just the thought of another war. But that is not to say that she is unaware of the principal parameters that it is once again about notions of magical power and magical blood superiority. That the source of this abhorrence stimulation is one immoral wizard, and although no one has identified as to who precisely this wizard is and where he came from, the whispered name is Lord Voldemort.
Wisest witch of her age or not, Minerva has deduced that the way to gather support for such evil campaign is to slither amongst the very ones who used to fanatically follow Grindelwald. And most of these people are easily known as part of the so-called sacred twenty-eight families.
More so, contrary to Dumbledore's notion that she is oblivious to the level of his meaning, she knew the intent and the significance of having a furthered association with Bellatrix Black… She who is a talented impressionable young witch, who can rally her peers on her side… She who happens to be in-love with her… And notably, she who is the eldest daughter of Cygnus and Druella Black…
Despite Minerva's misgivings about the young woman's romantic notion, along with Albus Dumbledore's unspoken manipulation, regardless his politically correct agenda… The truth is, deep within, Minerva McGonagall cares for Bellatrix Black, just not amorously.
"What happened at Christmas break, Bella?" She asked carefully and injected all the honest concern she has for the young witch. "I know you think I cannot be of help, but perhaps just talking about it can somehow—"
"Professor…" Bellatrix interposed in haste. And in the succeeding moments, Minerva could see the internal debate within the young witch before she settled into saying, "Thank you, Professor. But I'll manage it— all the lessons."
The disregard to her last query is palpable… Bellatrix is not taking her offer. She will not disclose whatever has transpired that certainly affected her to not come back to her class from Christmas break.
Minerva could only nod in acknowledgement, for both the unspoken and spoken statements.
"I won't consume more of your time than I already had with my…" she paused and eventually reduced into making a general gesture to oneself. And then she began bidding her leaving, after posing one last apology, "I am truly sorry… for everything I've falsely said to you. Have a good night, Professor."
Once again, just like the one in October, Minerva was left to allow Bellatrix dismissed their meeting. And then by Monday, the stack of parchment on the teacher's table caught her attention upon entering her classroom, even before she saw Bellatrix Black in her usual seat.
In a moment of delighted satisfaction, Minerva indulged.
"No offense to House Hufflehuff, but I've noticed the Gryffindors hourglass has overtaken yours for second place over the weekend. And it is rather nearing to tie the Slytherin's. Perhaps, Miss Black has returned to secure points for her house with excellent transfiguration exercises. What do you say Gryffindors? Pick up your slack, eh? I have a galleon in wager that we'll take home this year's cup."
It shocked the entire class.
As it was the case that they have never heard their Transfiguration Professor utter remotely sounding a jest, they were left completely clueless… But after a moment of stunned silence, one of the more than usual valiant Gryffindor students took up Minerva's challenge.
"Of course, Professor." And then true to Gryffindor House penchant for hopeless grandeur, the Gryffindor student added, "But if we failed, and Black manages to win more points in today's class, we'll just beat Ravenclaws tomorrow in the Quidditch's pitch, Professor!"
"Uy, you wish." A Ravenclaw protested. "We may be last right now, but there is no way you could win tomorrow. And we are not from the House of the Intellect for nothing, and can easily be as excellent as Black."
"What, and slid us to last place?" A Hufflehuff opposed. "Do not be misled by our amiability, we can be as excellent as Black, too."
Thereafter, a chorus of objections and bickering erupted… Minerva McGonagall permitted it to run for about thirty seconds before she reminded all the zealous young people that Professor McGonagall is in the room.
"All right, everyone." Minerva withheld her smile at the comically expedite transition, of the blabbering students into complete stillness, with just three words…
A waive of her hand and appearing on the board was the lesson for the day— Chapter fifty-seven of Volume VII.
"We're to re-examine the intricacies of returning the object to its original form when it already underwent multiple several transfigurations... Except this time, the original form is unknown."
Minerva watched the class simultaneously donned their academic look. "First, who can tell me the only element known to suppress its rudimentary properties thus it can bypass layers of conversion and return directly to its form?"
Several hands went up, and while she prides the ability to command such immediate serious scholastic behavior, today, she wanted to maintain the brilliant atmosphere they have started. Raising her brow, she posted "Where are those so-called excellent minds, eh?"
The rest of class raised their hands, and Minerva actually chuckled at the students, before calling the Ravenclaw student who had beaten everyone in hand raising before her goading.
By end of the day, it was said that seventh years from that class had spread amongst the student body how they have been treated to the wicked magical prowess of Professor Minerva McGonagall, who demonstrated complex transfigurations back and forth without breaking a sweat.
That portion of the spectacular parade of magic was turning four different school uniform ties, from four Hogwarts houses, into live miniature animals: lion, eagle, serpent, and badger. And then have them transfigured into each four state of matter: plasma, gas, liquid, and solid— in representation of classical elements of their respective house: fire, air, water, and earth. The blazing roaring lion, the howling flying eagle, the translucent slithering serpent, and the solid playing badger had turned every students in the class in joyful wonderment.
But the more pressing news that even Hogwarts staff heard and were surprised of, was the fact that Professor McGonagall actually indulged them with some laughter during class discussion. Oddly, the esteem given to her by the student body has been elevated by tenfold just because she allowed her students to see her in some candid laughs. And the most roguish ones are now her number one fans.
And so, that brilliant day extended into the rest of the week. Then into a whole month. And spilled to the next months. Before it all came crashing down after Easter break.
For the third time in the same school year, Minerva McGonagall had Bellatrix Black for a frank confrontation.
Minerva just returned from a meeting with other House Heads. She was quite livid from the reports she had received regarding multiple altercations involving Bellatrix with several students… All in a span of three days from coming back.
Minerva knew that Slughorn and the other Professors who witnessed and broke the fights had already taken house points and issued detentions accordingly. However, she could not help the ire and the equivalent concern for the unbelievable damaging shift with students' interactions, apparently started by Bellatrix Black.
"I do not have the tolerance to go around finding out the reason for your sudden abhorrent behaviour. Thus, I am asking you directly. What the hell happened this time when you went home that you came back to Hogwarts as if you have every intention to wage war at every turn with your peers?" Minerva asked heatedly.
"I do not have the tolerance to act as if I believe that you care." Bellatrix responded callously under her breath.
"I beg your pardon?"
"I will submit all your silly assignments and will sit in all your silly classes. My grades will be fine. I will not spoil your excellent teaching record." Bellatrix answered scathingly, before she turned her angry eyes on Minerva's bewildered emerald ones and spat viciously, "You do not have to humour me with your fictitious concern."
"You got it all wrong. I do care—"
"No. You only care about perfectly running this perfect school. The attention you've extended to me is for that and that alone… No! You do not get to claim that you care. You do not care about me once I am out of Hogwarts and thus no longer your obligation. It does not matter if I tell you what had happened at home, and what would happen to me. I doubt you would lift your precious finger to help me."
"What? How could I properly help you if you do not—"
"Oh, I did. I did! I even begged you… I told you to—"
"What are you referring to?"
"I told you last October. But of course the most esteemed Professor McGonagall was too high on her horse to consider being—"
"What? Is that it?" Minerva snapped. "That you want me to date you? Or marry you? Or that includes last January when you've handed me a sexual proposition...? Bloody hell, Bellatrix! Is that the only definition of caring in your book? Think, for Merlin's sake!"
Minerva McGonagall was torn between seething anger and genuine worry towards Bellatrix. In her almost 40 years of age and more than a decade of teaching, she has never been as confused as to the matter of rapid transformation/destruction.
It was literally just few months ago that she thought she achieved some kind of clarity with Bellatrix. That the girl responded with positive resignation. Sure, by January they hit a hiccup, but that also got resolved, or so she thought.
"Is that the only caring that you know? I am certain that if you search deep within, you know that it is not right. How unprofessional! How bordering illegal…! Oh what, you're now of age? All right, let's forget the issue of ruining my career and my name—"
"Yes, I know the unattainable Minerva McGonagall who in SECRET dates unnamed muggle would never taint her reputation—"
"Did it even matter that I've been thoughtful to not carelessly trample your feelings, yet will not lie to you? Perhaps you'd rather that I treat you with brutality that you have no second thoughts of assaulting me. Do you want me to tell you that despite your beauty, I am not attracted to you? That despite your intelligence, I am not interested to spending more time with you outside of my obligation? That your money and name mean nothing to me? Is that it? Would nasty words penetrate your understanding than accept cordiality as genuine concern? Would that really the direction to go? And then WHAT?"
"And we are back to the great McGonagall being genuinely concern over me?"
"Have you even considered my true feelings? Did you just decide to discard the private things I've opened up to you? Reject the fact that I am— I have been treating you with more concern than I have over most people here in this school? Did it never occur to you that you are the one who is selfish and being unfair to me?"
"You do not know what unfair is!"
"I do. Unfair was losing all my loved ones in a blink."
"This is not about you—"
"Suit yourself. But here is the truth Bellatrix, what YOU want from ME is more than I could afford."
"As I have said before, it does not matter." Bellatrix answered defiantly.
"You are being immature. And quite frankly, being a melodramatic spoiled brat. Yes, yes, you think you love me even though you have no idea who the hell I am…" Minerva was aware how she has been cursing more and more as she converse with Bellatrix. But she ignored the impropriety and pushed through to strike the heart of the matter.
"You are intelligent and yet bloody blind to see how you have your entire life ahead of you. When you leave Hogwarts, you have every means to go about your life and find someone who you will—"
"I AM TO MARRY AFTER GRADUATION!" Bellatrix cut off Minerva in a strangled scream.
Minerva almost did not comprehend the statement, but Bellatrix woes started pouring out, removing any obfuscation.
"They set my wedding date a week after I graduate… So much for having an entire life before me…"
That, without a doubt, explained it all.
And Minerva's anger and confusion quickly converted into pity…
"Last Christmas, my parents informed me that they have started to negotiate with pureblood families who have eligible sons who I can be married to. I begged them that I do not want to be married right away. That I want to pursue higher education... That I have my own plans… But they would not listen…"
Arrangement of marital union for their sons and daughters is not uncommon story amongst the pureblood families. The notion of blood purity is the disgusting forefront at play for this practice. Magical power, material wealth and magical connections are certainly the other factors.
Now and then, some young purebloods are fortunate to actually like or love the person they've been arranged with, but most cannot be said the same, if not, worse scenario for them… And notably, the witches in the losing column tally higher than those of the wizards, as the men would go about being bastards.
"You asked me why I wanted to stop attending after Christmas break? That's why. I was unsteady and sad. And to see you in class— to see someone who has drawn one's life according to how you wanted it… it was like a smothering rub to my face with what I've been dealt with in life… That I've been handed with another life's map… one far from what I want."
Minerva understood the suffocating suffering. Although she has no words that could really bring comfort, she needed to try. "You know that you can still take masteries after—"
"HAH!" Bellatrix barked hollowly. "I'd wager the entire Black's family vault that as impossible as it is for you, you are likely to agree to have one date with me, than for Rodolphus Lestrange to allow me to go for higher education once I've become his wife…"
Rodolphus Lestrange.
Needless to say, he is one dreadful wizard. Minerva taught him during her first few years of teaching. Try as she may, Minerva could not recall one redeeming characteristic about him. He is the typical untalented, unintelligent, unpleasant wizard, who throws himself around the school like Merlin's gift to the world just because he came from a pureblood family.
For that, Minerva is truly, truly sorry for Bellatrix.
"I foolishly thought I had time... But when I came home last Easter break, it was beyond me that I'd be engaged with Lestrange… I pleaded my parents to call it off. I told them that I do not want to marry someone I do not love…. And I admitted that I am in love with someone else… That I have plans… I have every intention to chase happiness and not chain myself to misery."
Bellatrix lost the fight and the tears that have been pooling in her eyes finally raced down her face. Minerva abandoned her standard physical detachment and reached out to the young woman and wrapped her arms around her. The unexpected gesture triggered more tears that fell from her Bellatrix's eyes, along with litany of hopeless despair.
Bellatrix began spilling more of her plan to navigate her life through masteries and establishing herself as a witch of her own, and not just because she comes from a pureblood family. She mentioned about her willingness to risk portion of her trust fund in order to launch her own Potion store or be the ultimate supplier of these stores. That she has this brilliant idea to give a sort of Potion Masterclass for interested students during summer breaks at the place of her business.
Soon, Minerva was silently listening to Bellatrix's concession about her feelings towards her. That she had given merit to the fact that she is still young and could very well love another. That it would be more sensible to just let her feelings for Minerva run its natural course… if through time, it will fade, or if it will fortify… And then consequently find out whether her she has a slightest chance with Minerva after her accomplishments, or ultimately she would have to call it her one-true-heartbreak. One that she'll work to get over as life goes on...
Minerva could not say anything to counter, as she was hesitant about verbalising her agreement/disagreement at the wisdom of Bellatrix's strategy towards her feelings for her. It is not a prudent thing for her to reiterate that she does not return the love in such way… Instead, she maintained her comforting hold on Bellatrix.
"I am very much afraid of how being trapped in a marriage, one that is arranged, particularly with Lestrange! I fear it would drive me MAD…" Bellatrix sobbed wretchedly. "I thought of running away… I have a plan in mind on how I could leave the country by saying that I would travel in between graduation date and my wedding, but would escape. And for a while lay low and hide, until I have finished mastery in Potions… But Cissy and Andy— I could not bear to leave my sisters. I am sure they will be forbidden to see me. And the thought of never seeing or speaking to them is all the more breaking me apart… THAT I cannot endure."
Minerva thought of how most of these young purebloods are seen as members of sinister circles, who are all undergoing training to be cold and cruel, until they have become adults themselves, who are expected to carry the tradition of raising their sons and daughters, to be also cold and cruel, and then keep the cycle going. But hearing Bellatrix's love for her sisters are reminding her that these young people are like everyone else, who hold people dear in their hearts… except they are essentially trapped in a mean family convention… And Minerva recognised the great burden of breaking out.. and the almost impossibility to do so…
"I wanted to find courage to draw my own path. But I am so afraid that I am not strong enough to deal with any of the consequences… The sorting hat was entirely mistaken when it wanted to place me into Gryffindor."
Minerva was stunned at the revelation. She withdrew her hold on Bellatrix to able to look her in the eyes. And Bellatrix answered her unspoken question.
"It was going to send me to Gryffindor House. But I asked to send me to Slytherin. Everyone knows that everyone in our family was sorted there. I know that's where my family expects me to be. So how could the stupid hat tell me that bravery is my foremost trait when I am trembling with every thought of losing my chance of having my own life, or losing my family if I pursue my own life? I do not have the courage to defy my parents! I do not have it in me to be like you… to live your life however you—"
"Bella, do not give up…" Minerva could not prevent the massive compassion she felt at the crushing display and bleakness in front of her. Her hands sympathetically ran along Bellatrix's arms and held to one gritting hand. Then to offer more comfort, she raised her other hand, affixed a strand behind Bellatrix's ear, and cupped the right side of the young witch's face. "Perhaps there is still another option, you just have to look into."
No one is daft enough to think that Minerva could easily present Bellatrix a viable alternative. First, she knew that it would be a delusion to talk out the Black of their absurd family breeding scheme. But one thing that she learned from Albus Dumbledore since she was a teenager, that any dire situation is not as dead-end as we often perceived, for there is always something— not exactly ideal or favourable, but sometimes, one step back is all it takes to see another trail.
Except most regrettably, in those silent seconds while Minerva was severely thinking of what possible routes she could offer, she failed to foresee that perhaps due to chaotic emotional state, Bellatrix would mislay her caring gesture as something else, as something more…
Consequently, it led Bellatrix to injuriously cross the line of no return.
"What are you doing?" Minerva gasped as she jerked her hand away from Bellatrix's face. "What are you doing?" She repeated harshly as she stepped away to create a distance between them.
Quite unconsciously, Minerva was wiping her hand against her teaching robe, as if to remove any essence— after Bellatrix's lips had kissed her palm.
All at once, tremendous terror and humiliation filled Bellatrix's tear strained face. And widened dark eyes stared into her emeralds without blinking.
In the subsequent long and burning minute of consciousness, Minerva was shoved with the fact that her response to Bellatrix's action— was a clear display of repulsion…
At her own equally repulsive reaction, Minerva mightily cursed inside her mind.
She felt angry, wretched, and ensnared. But once again, Minerva excruciatingly reminded herself that she is the adult in the situation. That she must be the one to somehow throw an anchor for both of them, in order to survive the bloody moment.
Intended to initiate the tough amalgamation of appeasement, admonition, and explanation between them, Minerva moved forward to get hold of the young Slytherin.
But her hands caught air, as Bellatrix turned away and rushingly exited her office, without a word, without looking back.
End of Chapter 33 - Year 2005
Chapter Title: Another Rounds with Bella
Posted 17 March 2021
The Bellatrix tangent took its own life and thus another chapter. I know I should be writing the sequence about Hermione and Minerva. But these confrontations between Bella and Minerva kept playing in my head that I just had to write them. I hope you don't mind another backstory of the backstory :)
Thank you very much for STILL reading!
Please let me know how do you feel with the way the story is shaping up.