Author's note: At risk of sounding like a broken record... thank you so much for the ongoing support and kind reviews. They are really appreciated. I hope you enjoy this update. I'm still writing for Darien and Serena over in my new collection of shorts 'You Were Good To Me', so check it out! There is more to come there. We are nearing the end now in Kintsugi and it has been SO fun to write for. I expect another two chapters are left for me to write (but they say the best laid plans...) so do let me know what you think. Love - R

Chapter 33

A flash of light flickered and died. A moment later, the place was lit up again, and promptly went out. Then a familiar screech of frustration echoed around the grounds.

"Damn it!" Serena exclaimed, stamping her foot.

"Calm down," Luna demanded. "Honestly, Serena. It's okay. It'll just take some time. Do you remember when we first started training when you became Sailor Moon?"

"Of course, I do," Serena replied in exasperation.

"Well, it's great to see you've matured," Luna said drily.

"Oh, but Luna!" Serena whined. "I just can't do it!"

"Can you kill the decibels?" Artemis wondered from his quiet seated position at the side-lines, his tail curled around him.

Serena glared at him and turned back to Luna.

"Help me!" she begged.

"Focus, Serena," Luna said. "Every time you use Moon power, you connect with that power from the entire cosmos. Planet power is the single most powerful thing that cannot be corrupted. It is your birth right. Feel that light and harness it."

Serena blinked, pouting her lips in annoyance.

"How does that help me?" she snapped. "That's like telling someone who can't drive to sit in the driver's seat of a car and then drive it."

"I told you why we need to train," Luna reminded her gently. "So come on, chop, chop."

"Fine," Serena relented, shaking her shoulders in a brief shimmy and shaking her hands out.

She held her hands out in front of her, her thumbs and pinkie fingers touching in a lotus mudra. She closed her eyes, the concentration clear on her face as she tensed the corners of her mouth just a bit. Her eyebrows pushed together gently, and a ball of light formed between her fingers. She opened her eyes slowly to see the ball of moonlight and the tension left her mouth to push the corners of her mouth up into a smile.

"Great," Luna praised. "Now focus it."

Serena's eyes looked ahead of her and she touched each of her fingertips together, twisting her hands round to shoot her hands forward, releasing the ball of moonlight. She watched as the light faded in the air quickly and she sighed.

"Yes, great," Serena said tartly, looking at Luna pointedly.

"Darling, patience," Queen Serenity's voice interrupted them.

The three of them turned to look at the Silver Millennium goddess, who was approaching them with an amused expression on her face.

"Mother," Serena gasped. "What are you doing here? I mean… did you want to join us?"

"Actually, I want to help you," Serenity offered. "I can feel that you're struggling, so here."

Much quicker than Serena was able, Serenity effortlessly brought her hands up, closing her eyes briefly, a ball of moonlight forming in her hands and she brought her hands forward towards the Moon Castle. The light shot from her palms, embracing the castle, lighting up the moons on each of the turrets. Serenity turned towards Serena who was gaping at the display her Lunarian mother had created.

"Do you see anything?" she asked.

"Yeah!" Serena exclaimed. "Tremendous power that I can't access."

"But you have," Serenity replied.

"What do you mean?" Serena frowned.

"How do you think you are here, Serena?"

Serena brought her eyes down to the ground, but she didn't see it. Instead, what she saw was a simulated battle ground with the sailor guardians and the Shitennou. She recalled mummies surrounding her and the fear overwhelming her. She had raised her hands, feeling the warmth of her light simmering in her palms. In the next moment, a bright shining pure-white light fired from her palms, but it hadn't stopped there. She felt the warmth of the light engulf her completely, shooting out in all directions, taking out every simulated monster in the training arena. That was the last thing she remembered. She raised her eyes to look at Serenity.

"I brought myself here," she whispered.

Serenity nodded.

"You need to be where you're strongest."

"On the moon," Serena deduced.

Serenity nodded again.

"The moon goes through phases, representing the rhythm of time as it embodies the cycle," Serenity went on. "These phases represent immortality, eternity and the enlightenment or the dark side of nature herself. For the Earth, we brighten the sky when it's dark. We are light." Serenity squinted her eyes for the briefest moment. "The Earth Prince is in the dark."

"And we need to bring him into the light," Serena murmured.

"No," Luna corrected, "you do."

Serena and Serenity turned to look at the lunar cat.

"We explained to you how your connection with Darien works," Luna went on. "None of us can reach him, but you. You share a deeper connection than he realises, though I strongly suspect that he feels it. Two kingdoms combined, whether dormant or not, makes you both stronger. And to be frank, the Earth needs Darien. This is why he's getting the headaches, feeling weak and sick."

Serena sighed. Serenity pursed her lips and reached up to squeeze her shoulder gently.

"Do you know why I suggested you try to harness your moonlight powers with the lotus mudra?" she asked.

Serena blinked at her dumbfounded, not at all expecting that question.

"Honestly, not really," she replied. "I just presumed it was a quirk you had."

Serenity chuckled.

"Oh, Serena," she said affectionately. "Have you never wondered why Sailor Mars practices meditation so frequently?"

Again, Serena shook her head.

"I just thought it was a hobby," she admitted.

"Sailor Mars practices self-discipline and grounding. Each of your powers originates from a different place and you each wield it differently according to what emotions triggers it. However, the foundation of your powers is the same and it all comes from your heart chakra. The heart chakra acts as your centre of compassion, empathy, love, and forgiveness. These are qualities that all sailor soldiers in the universe possess as guardians and protectors. The lotus mudra opens the heart chakra, and it is a symbol of purity, which is precisely what the moon's power stands for. It's why the evils of the world fights so hard against it. A lotus flower sits on the surface of the pond, opening to the sun as its roots remain deeply embedded into the muddy bottom, holding it firm and strong. It is the symbol of light and beauty emerging from the darkness. The message of the lotus mudra is to stay connected to your roots, open yourself to the light and realise that the greatest sense of steadiness in life is an open heart. It will help you to focus your power and harness your strength. In time, you may not need such focus but perhaps you may find it helpful to work with your power in this way."

Serena patiently listened, finally understanding the Queen's requests.

"I understand," she simply replied.

Serenity said nothing but gestured with a minute gesture of her head for Serena to proceed. Serena pressed her lips together and closed her eyes in concentration, feeling the ground beneath her feet, aware of the breeze against her skin, her skirts flowing around her legs, the strength in her heart. It felt like time stopped as she resonated with the phases of the moon, feeling the time shift around her, feeling the warmth of her home. She felt the tug of power that constantly beckoned her from Earth, and she wanted to respond, but she knew she couldn't. Not yet. She brought her hands together into the lotus mudra as she was taught and focused her energy. She didn't need to open her eyes to know that she had conjured pure moonlight, for she felt its warm energy, felt the glow on her skin. She raised the corners of her mouth just a bit and opened her eyes, acting on instinct, closing her fingers around the ball of light, and mimicked her mother, shooting the light towards the moon castle. She watched as the light engulfed the palace, shining on the moon turrets, then shooting off each of the moons in a display of fireworks in the sky.

"Well, I must say," Artemis commented, the light reflected in his eyes as he watched the performance of power.

Serena brushed the heel of her hand against her forehead and raised her eyes to the light she managed to conjure. She looked at Serenity to see her approving face looking back at her.

"Do you see what a little patience and discipline can do?"

"Oh yeah," Serena whispered. Then she felt a distressed pull in her heart, and she groaned with a frown. "Oh, something's wrong."

"What is it, Serena?" Luna urged.

"Something is happening on Earth," Serena gasped.

"Not to worry, darling," Serenity soothed her. "I didn't reincarnate you all in a second life for it to end."

It was ridiculous that so much could happen in such a short amount of time. Yet, in just one lifetime, so much was gained and lost but, in some ways, it felt like their life was only just beginning. It was strange to think that they were now in their third lifetime, but the rest just faded into the background, almost as if it were someone else's lives and not once theirs. But right now, none of that mattered. All it took was one moment for your whole existence to flash before your eyes and it wasn't easy. All it took was one moment to define you and one action to mark you forever. It wasn't anything he could forget easily. As he ascended the long staircase, he wasn't seeing anything around him or hearing any of the usual sounds that indicated where he was. All he could see was her hands reaching out without fear to protect him. Hear her screams to alert him to the danger. But it was the stillness that was torture. The silence that was deafening. He felt like he had his heart in his throat and it wouldn't go away until she was shooting flaming arrows again but for now, that was impossible.

He finally reached the entrance to the temple and with no hesitation, strode through the doors and down the corridor until he met the slightly ajar door of her room. He stood still, running his fingers through his short blonde locks as he breathed out with stress. And he reached out to push the door open quietly, entering the room silently, taking note that Amy must have recently left her. He could barely stand to rest his eyes on her, but he couldn't stop himself even if he wanted to. He had to see her, alive and breathing.

He knew the tension in his jaw released once he laid eyes on her sleeping form because there was no mistaking the horror that he felt that he knew would be reflected in his face. Her face was slightly turned to the left of her, revealing the scarring down her neck and what he suspected went right down her side underneath her clothes. His breath hitched in his throat as he pulled up a chair to sit by her side, noting her hands. Her hands were red raw, bruised and slightly swollen. He saw it again in his mind: her fingers wrapping around the tentacles that were going for him. He spotted a bowl of antiseptic, a bundle of bandages and a wastepaper bin with a number of bloody gauzes in it. He remembered her groan when the Croatoan bit into her shoulder. He sighed heavily, feeling the tears behind his eyes.

"Why?" he murmured. "Why would you do it? Why would you put yourself in danger like that? For me."

He reached forward and carefully reached for her hand and cradled it in both of his own. He felt grieved seeing her lying like this. The woman lying here wasn't the fearless, strong warrior. Granted, she was always the fearless, strong warrior of his heart, but today, she was broken, tired and struggling to heal. He couldn't forget the hurt, betrayal and sadness in her eyes when she revealed how she felt towards the Shitennou. He guessed he could understand the hurt, but he didn't expect that she'd feel so… wounded, like an open injury that never healed, blood seeping through the stitches. So, he just couldn't understand why she would do this, when Sailor Mars should have been standing in the way of the Croatoan and Serena, not him.

"How could you protect me like that?" he whispered into her hand. "Your life is more precious than mine. You shouldn't be lying here, broken, wounded."

He felt a tear fall from his eye and fall onto her skin, but he didn't bother to wipe it away. It didn't matter. No matter her reasons for hating him, he loved her. There was no denying it now.

He exhaled sharply, his breath brushing against her skin. Her eyelids fluttered and she shifted gently on the pillow. He didn't notice as he set her hand down on top of her bedsheets carefully and stood, turning to the door. He couldn't sit here. He'll never be rid of the sight of her like this.

"Jack?"

His hand halted on the door and he turned to face Raye who was awake and staring at him curiously.

"Raye," he said.

"What are you…" she started, then stopped and tried again. "Hi."

"How are you feeling?" he asked, unsure what else to ask, but feeling like it was a stupid question all the same.

"I don't think I'm in any pain," she answered. "You?"

"I'm unharmed," he replied shortly.

"Good," she breathed, resting her head fully into the pillow and turning her head to the left again to gaze through the window.

Seeing the scarring down her neck again, he couldn't help himself.

"Why did you do it?"

Her head whipped round to glare at him but then she immediately winced with a groan.

"Raye?"

"Shut up a minute," she demanded, "and let it pass."

"I thought you weren't in any pain," he echoed her.

She glared at him again.

"I don't think my bones have quite recovered after that monster squeezed the living daylights out of me," she grumbled. "Anyway, what kind of question is that?"

"You fought that monster with your bare hands… for me," Jackson reminded. "And you got so hurt as a result. Again, for me. Why? Especially after I hurt you so much."

Raye sighed, bringing her hand up to rub her face but winced at the pain in her shoulder.

"Jack…" she murmured, trailing off. "I don't hate you. It's like I said, you all abandoned us. You abandoned me. My life changed forever after that. Venus and I… we gave ourselves over to our mission as sailor guardians of the Moon Princess. That was all. Then you came back into our lives and all I could remember was our battle with the Dark Kingdom. Our battle with you. And it still hurts. I don't know how you could do that. I was forced to kill you."

"We were suspicious of the Moon and its constant surveillance of Earth," Jackson explained. "We never stopped caring for our prince. When he died, we were all devastated. We don't know how to make up for past sins, but we continue to protect him at all costs now. It was a mistake. We were drawn in by the evils of the Dark Kingdom. We were weak."

"Typical people of the Earth," she sighed, shaking her head in disgust.

"I know it's not an excuse," he defended himself. "Honestly, I wish we could take it back, but it happened. And you have to deal with that."

"Funny," she said drily. "I believe I am."

Jackson looked at her, really looked at her. He realised that he couldn't see her injuries on the inside from the trauma of the past, but he could see the scars on the surface. He sat down.

"You shouldn't be suffering now," he stated. "I should be where you are right now. You shouldn't have protected me, Raye."

"Yes, I should," she disagreed. "I don't want you to die." She looked at him directly, her violet eyes shining. "I'll heal and the scarring will fade. Super healing and all that." She inhaled, a frown pushing her eyebrows together gently. "I love you, Jack, I just don't know how to love you. My loyalty to Serena and Darien is stronger than anything else. I just need time to get past that all of you made the biggest mistake in the universe and I just need to hate you a little longer. I don't know if I'll ever be able to forgive you, but I can try to. My intuition tells me to trust you and right now, that's enough."

"It's more than I deserve," Jackson acknowledged.

"I think saving your life is the first step to knowing that I'll let you in some day," Raye offered a small smile.

"Some day is something," he replied.

"Hi Amy," Zane greeted her, as he came into the sailor headquarters to join her. "How is it going? Sorry, I had to dash earlier. Killian wanted to test the Shitennou stones after Mina left with Darien." He paused. "I suppose that begs the question: do you know where she took him?"

Amy looked at him from over the rim of her glasses.

"They aren't on Earth, so I am presuming that she's taken him to the Moon," she replied.

"Seriously?" he asked. "She can just take him like that?"

"It's not quite as simple as it sounds," Amy commented absently.

"Wait, you said you presume," he repeated.

Amy sighed, and stopped tapping into her Mercury computer.

"Yes," she confirmed. "I can't track them, hence my presumption. I think my inability to track them is for good reason. I think it has something to do with Serena." She shrugged. "I'm not worried. I can still feel Venus' power, and they're safe. They're just not here." She looked down again at her Mercury computer with a frown. "That creature really isn't making this easy for me." She looked back up at him. "I'm sorry. I'm distracted. Did you come in for something?"

"Yes," Zane laughed. "I came in to see how it's going and if you need any help." He nodded his head towards the Mercury computer. "How is our guest?"

"It might be easier to show you instead," she said.

She brought her Mercury goggles down and tapped into her Mercury computer. They both turned to look beyond the highly advanced base into the empty space beyond and that was where Mercury's hyperspatial sphere shield appeared to reveal the Croatoan trapped inside in the sealed off dimension. But what shocked Zane was that it was just standing there patiently.

"You said that the creature isn't making it easy for you," he mused. "What did you mean by that?"

"It looks like it's doing nothing," Amy explained. "But do you remember when I told you that it's immune to magic? This is why we can hurt it, but we can't eliminate it with our powers alone. There's always an underlying cause for why it leaves."

"Such as revealing our deepest darkest secret," Zane finished.

"Indeed," Amy nodded. "But the problem with being immune to magic? I can hold it there, but I can't hold it forever. It's actually sucking the energy that is containing it in the subspace. I was hoping the chrono lock would hold it in place until we're ready but it's not working as effectively as I'd hope."

Zane considered her thoughtfully.

"Amy," he started. "What exactly does that mean for you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, essentially, you're using a defensive power on it, right? And we can use magic defensively but to attack it won't have a long term or permanent effect on it. But you said that it's sucking the energy, so that indicates that it will puncture a hole in the sphere, releasing it." He frowned, suddenly looking horrified. "Is this exhausting you to hold?"

"It takes a little more energy than I'm used to," she admitted. "This is why I've been working on the computer to see how I can strengthen it. So far, no such luck."

"Do you want my help?"

Amy looked at him, stress etched across her face and she reached out for his hand, almost shyly.

"Thank you," she accepted.

"Oh, man, Amy," he grimaced. "You're quite clammy. Are you alright?"

"Like I said," she repeated, "it takes a little more energy than I'm used to."

"On that note, how is Raye?"

"On the mend," Amy replied. "I think Jackson went to visit her. I left her sleeping about an hour ago. She's, at least, not bleeding anymore. There's scarring where I was able to heal her, but her sailor powers will clear all of that up in time. She will heal. It'll just be a process. The problem was that she got injured in her civilian form. We aren't as strong when we're like that."

"Ah," Zane hummed. "Hold on, you girls are able to combine your strength, right?"

"Yeah, we can," Amy confirmed. "For example, if we performed a sailor planet attack. It takes a lot out of us though. Why?"

"Do you think you'll be able to combine powers with the Shitennou?"

"All of you? I'm not sure how that would work. Your powers are so different from ours."

"I wasn't so much thinking that you combine your powers with all of us," he explained. "I was wondering if you'd be able to combine your powers with mine. I mean all of our powers compliment each of yours in some ways, so it might be possible."

"How could you help with that though?" she asked, pointing at the motionless Croatoan.

"A little faith, please," he smiled, pecking her on the lips, causing a blush to rise in her cheeks at his touch. "Power up, water nymph."

"Well, at least it's not meatball head," she smiled with a chuckle.

Serena sat cross-legged on her bed, testing her powers by conjuring balls of light as she'd been practicing. She mused to herself how easily her mother wielded her power and wondered if she would ever be able to marry up to her. She couldn't imagine being her wonderful, powerful, poised, beautiful mother who she knew was loved by many in the universe. She knew she wasn't everything that everyone wanted out of the Moon Princess, but they loved her regardless. It felt misguided. They didn't really know her. She sighed and gazed out through the doors that led out to her balcony and looked at the sky, which was darkening as day turned to night, except on the moon, the night was never dark.

Time started to lose all meaning for her, the longer that she was on the moon. She thought it strange that she didn't feel homesick. The moon was her home, but the earth was where her heart lay. It was weird but she didn't feel cut off from her friends, or Darien, at all. It was like she never left them, even though she has to watch over them from afar while she was here. But she missed them. She didn't feel time passing on the moon. It was like one long day. She didn't feel tired though. She missed feeling tired. It reminded her that she was human, but maybe she wasn't. Even now, it felt like her connection with Darien was stronger, like he was near. She shook her head at her wishful thinking.

She climbed off the bed, the skirts of her dress falling to the floor around her legs in waves and she walked out onto the balcony. She gazed down at the marble planet feeling the déjà vu and knowing she had indeed been here before. That was a sad thought, and it made her heart feel heavy. She looked down at her hands to see the flicker of moonlight in her fingers, but it was dull. Sometimes she cursed that her powers were so entwined in her emotions. There really was only one person who negated that, and she hated it. It felt like a burden he shouldn't have to shoulder but she recalled him once saying that there was no burden that he'd rather share with her. It was really odd, but she felt like he was with her. That same warmth…

There was a soft orange glow shining behind her and she turned to look back into her room. There was something familiar about this glow and she knew that she knew it. The light grew brighter, and she was forced to close her eyes until the moment she felt the shine dull. She opened her eyes to find her room empty and she felt her shoulders sag. She was certain…

"Serena!" came a familiar squeal behind her.

She whirled round in shock to find Sailor Venus stood in the doorway leading to her balcony and she cried out in excitement as she leaped forward to embrace her tightly.

"V, what are you doing here?" she exclaimed. "I thought it was you I could feel!"

"Of course," Venus grinned, hugging her back excitedly. "I couldn't resist startling you."

Serena pulled away to stare at her in amusement.

"Alright, okay, okay," Venus laughed. "I come bearing gifts."

"What do…" she trailed off when she watched Darien appear from around the corner on the balcony and stand in the doorway.

"Hi, Meatball Head," he greeted her.