Hogwarts
November 16, 2006
"The Dark Lord expects much from you, Mudblood," the man sneered at her. "Again!"
Hermione was breathless, wand at her side and sweat dripping down her face. She had survived Corps boot camp, but of course there, people hadn't put completely unrealistic expectations on her.
She had started 'training' under Amycus Carrow three days earlier – a regime that seemed to consist of him throwing curses at her and expecting her to curse him back. So far, it seemed the curriculum was entirely focused on breaking her down.
But she wouldn't break – she refused. "Stupefy!" she called out, and he deflected it easily, sending a curse her way that she deftly leaped to evade.
"Use your wand!" he belted at her.
Early on, she had disarmed the man with a carefully placed kick, followed up with an elbow to the nose – it was a reflex. Her Corps training had included how to avoid spells and handle interactions with magicals. Now, however, she was informed that this was unacceptable.
After the misstep that day, he had disarmed her, trapping her against a wall before sending cuts up and down her arms to punish her. She did not attempt a physical offensive again.
That moment, where she had been tied up helplessly and watched the cruel man smiling as he threw cut after cut her way, had been an important reminder. She was not here on some sort of sociological experiment, and these people weren't simple religious cultists. These were bigots following a madman who had literally torn apart his soul. If they learned she didn't have any interest in helping them – or worse, of her true mission there – she would be lucky if they only killed her.
She shivered at the thought, refocusing on the task at hand. "Yes sir," she told Carrow, hoping she effectively kept the vitriol out of her voice.
"Depulso!" she called out, and again, the man threw out a shield.
The next time, she attempted her own Protego, and his spell harmlessly hit it – at first. And then he kept going, pushing closer and closer, until Hermione's exhaustion got the better of her and his stunner hit her, knocking her out.
"Rennervate," she heard, blinking her eyes in confusion as none other than Draco Malfoy stood over her, his hand out. She cracked her neck, sore from being rendered unconscious, again, and pointedly got up on her own, ignoring his hand.
"Are you alright?" he asked, frowning in concern.
"Just my daily lessons," she spat bitterly.
"How is that going?" he asked.
"Oh, I don't know. Apparently learning magic involves getting cursed all day long," Hermione drawled, pulling herself together and using her wand to check the time. 6 pm? She realized Carrow must have left her there for over an hour.
"We don't have to do this," Draco reminded her, his voice soft.
She looked at him, keeping her facial expression neutral. "Yes, we do."
"Well, can I help you then?"
"No, you can't," she breathed and walked past him and out the classroom door, heading to the right.
"That's not the way out," he called to her.
She closed her eyes, willing herself to remain calm. But everything he said just grated her, and all she wanted was a headache potion. "Come on." She beckoned him to follow her.
He frowned but complied, turning down various corridors behind her until they came to a rather plain looking door. She tapped it three times and the door opened, showing what looked like a very oldpotions classroom.
"What is this place?" he asked.
"I've been exploring Hogwarts after my lessons, making special notes of any rooms that aren't on the map Sirius Black gave us. I found this room; I believe it was a potions classroom a long time ago, but the stores are still connected to the greenhouses," she explained. She lifted a vial on one of the tables and took a sip, letting out a sigh of relief. "Oh that's better. Carrow is a bigoted piece of shit."
Draco gave a soft chuckle. "Well, he's actually not as bad as his sister."
Hermione's jaw dropped. "You're joking! He basically chained me to a wall and tortured me when I disarmed him the 'Muggle' way," she informed him.
He paled, but didn't look particularly surprised. "Alecto used to have us practice curses on each other – we were expected to cast an effective Cruciatus by the age of 15."
"But – why?" Hermione stuttered, appalled.
He shrugged. "I assume the same reason Amycus curses you all day. They view the ability to cause pain as a sign of strength."
"That's absurd," Hermione said, and then recalled a long-forgotten conversation. "Do you still feel that way? I remember not long ago, you explained to me the importance of power in leadership."
Draco nodded. "I did, but–" he paused, carefully considering his words, "–when I was sent to find you, the Dark Lord described you as a 'powerful being.' I guess I was expecting some sort of 'super witch.' But I realized, it's not your magic that makes you powerful, it's your mind. Your magic – which is extraordinary – is nothing compared to your intelligence. That's when I understood – leadership is about so much more than raw power."
Hermione had been preparing a new potion but stopped midway through his speech, frowning. "Well, that's good." She hadn't expected him to be so — enlightened on the subject.
He looked disappointed by her reaction. "Is everything alright?" He tried to put a hand on her shoulder but she shrugged him off, moving to a closet where the stores of supplies were located.
He looked around the room. "Where did you get all these books?"
"Library," she answered, returning with a few jars before refocusing on the potion. "Once I realized that Carrow had no intention of actually teaching me anything, I decided I might as well teach myself."
"Why didn't you ask me for help?" He looked hurt, watching her work mechanically from a distance.
"Why would I?" She didn't even look up from her potion.
"Did I do something?"
"No," she answered, too quickly.
"Mm-hmm." He stepped closer. "Hermione, look at me. What's wrong?"
Hermione was silent, freezing in the middle of a clockwise stir. "Why didn't you tell me you were getting married in a month?"
"It didn't matter."
"Oh, sorry, you're right, my mistake!" She was livid, angrily placing some sort of herb in the cauldron, stirring aggressively.
"That's not what I meant," Draco groaned. "You're infuriating, you know that right?"
"You're not the first to call me that." She shrugged.
"What I mean is that, when you found out about her, I had no intention of ever coming back here, so it didn't matter," he explained.
"But then we did decide to come back, and you could have said something," she pointed out.
"I don't know what to say" He looked regretful.
"Have you spent time with her?" she asked.
"Really, Granger?" he drawled.
"She seems delightful. And her sister is brilliant," Hermione pointed out.
"I don't want to be with her."
"But if we're still here in a month, will you have a choice?" she asked, now methodically chopping roots.
He walked over, grabbing her hand and pulling her from the cauldron.
"Draco! The potion!"
He rolled his eyes and cast a quick stasis charm earning a reprimanding look from the witch. "I'm sorry," he told her, "I don't know why I didn't tell you. I guess I hoped the engagement would just go away."
"Do you see why I struggle to trust you?" She looked him right in the eye. Hermione had spent an indecent amount of time thinking about it the last few days – questioning why he continued to lie to her. Did he not respect her? Death Eater society was, she noticed, quite chauvinistic. Perhaps he believed he was entitled to only sharing with her what he wanted to?
But there was that nagging thought in the back of her mind: what else was he keeping from her? What other secrets would come out and continue to hurt her? So she had made no effort to see him over the past three days, hoping time and space would let her see this situation rationally and without her heart attempting to pound out of her chest at the mere thought of him.
He looked almost in pain. "The whole deal with Astoria isn't important, Hermione! I told you–"
"That you want me just trust you without question, yes I recall," she started, neglecting to mention his admission to her that night, which she had definitely not dwelled on.
"No," he said, grabbing her hand and pulling her away from her potions and towards another table covered in books. She let herself be moved, a worried look crossing her face as he grabbed her other hand. "You should trust me because I care about you, and I won't let anything happen to you."
She shook her head and dropped her hands, letting them fall to her sides. "Do you understand what I've been through in the last month? I've told you. I want to trust you. But you have to show me – you have to stop lying and hiding things. Right now, you are my only ally here. Do you understand exactly how precarious my situation is here?" she asked him.
"Of course."
"No – I don't think you do. Because honestly, until the last few days, I didn't quite appreciate it. Right now, I'm protected, to some extent, because Volde – the Dark Lord – clearly has plans for me. But if he gets the slightest inkling that perhaps my motives for being here aren't quite so pure and innocent, what then? Do you think he'll just give me a stern lecture? Perhaps they'll give me a portkey back to London? No, I don't think so. Amycus represents a substantial number of the Death Eaters – the ones who are just waiting for me to screw up, so they can show me what they really think of me." She stopped, breathless once again.
"We can leave, right now." He tentatively moved his hands to her shoulders, gently rubbing her arms. She couldn't help it; she sighed at the contact, leaning into his hand.
"No," she reiterated. "I'm sorry. It's been a trying three days."
"You have to let me help," he told her pointedly.
"Alright," she conceded.
"Alright?" He looked surprised.
"I admit that perhaps my anger towards you is not entirely rational. But I do acknowledge that you are intelligent and capable, and I'm realizing I cannot do this on my own," she explained.
He nodded; though he was frowning slightly.
"Well, I actually came here for a reason." He paused. "A few friends and I are going to a pub. I wanted to see if you'd like to join."
"That's probably not a good idea." She smiled softly. "Not all of your friends are quite so accepting of me."
"Well, Greg won't be there. It's just going to be Vincent, Millie, and Theo," he explained.
"I thought you were wary of Theo," Hermione reminded him.
He nodded. "It's part of why I want to go; I'm hoping some drink will get him to open up about what's been happening here while I was away."
She considered it. She had met Vincent the day before, when he had been over to take Millie on a formal 'date' of sorts. He seemed relatively innocuous and genuinely smitten with her host. As far as Draco's theories on Theo were concerned, she still thought he was perhaps looking at the situation incorrectly, that he only doubted Theo because he himself had changed. But she had given up on arguing further on the matter.
"You have a pub here?" She hadn't recalled seeing anything.
"Well, we do two days a week," he said sheepishly.
"Hmm. Alright. But if I'm uncomfortable, I'm leaving."
When Draco and Hermione made it to the pub, apparently called the 'Snake Head,' which made Hermione snort for all the wrong reasons, everyone was already there. And by everyone she meant Theo, Millie, Vincent, and Astoria. Draco gave her shoulder a quick squeeze and a look that assured her that he truly hadn't expected her to be there. Hermione gave him a quick nod in understanding before sitting in the empty chair next to Millicent.
"I'm so glad you made it." Millie smiled warmly. Hermione wondered, not for the first time, how this woman, who didn't seem to have a mean bone in her body, could possibly survive in a place like this.
"Of course," Hermione replied, looking around to see that other than their table of six, only two other tables were occupied. She thought of the few times she had been to pubs in London and how loud and boisterous they seemed to be. She couldn't quite decide if this was a point for or against the Death Eaters. As it was, the pub's atmosphere was dark and dank. The lights flickered, and she wondered if this was incidental or for effect. Glasses washed themselves behind the bar, and drinks floated to and fro.
The walls were conspicuously bare, odd rectangular splotches indicating a painting or tapestry had been removed. She wondered why they hadn't fixed this place – perhaps it had only recently opened up? Or perhaps they just didn't care. She imagined it could be done easily with magic, but maybe it wasn't so simple.
Theo placed a shot in front of her, and her mind went back to the last time she drank, her eyes inadvertently landing on Draco before blinking back to the drink in front of her.
"It's firewhiskey," Theo said with a knowing smirk, moving his chair to her right.
She knew what firewhiskey was – but figured it was best not to remind Death Eaters that magicals and non-magicals lived together in the rest of the world. So, she smiled demurely and took the shot, giving only the slightest wince as it burned down her throat. She tried to ignore Draco, who was sitting next to Astoria while giving Hermione little looks.
"Want another?" Theo asked, a smirk on his face. His perfectly coiffed hair fluttered in the air when a patron left and a gust of wind streamed in.
"Why not?" Hermione responded. She wished she could blend into the wall and be an anthropologist, documenting and analyzing the movements of these young Death Eaters. She watched Millie and Vince flirt and gossip about Death Eater minutiae, but she tried not to judge since Millie did appear to be truly happy. Astoria looked so proper as she sat in her olive-green robes and took sips of her firewhiskey.
Draco was a perfect gentleman, asking her about how everything was coming along as she settled into her new life in Hogsmeade, what hobbies she had, what she had studied. Looking at the couples as her second firewhiskey was placed in front of her, she realized – they were coupled off. Vince and Millie, Draco and Astoria, and–
"So Hermione," Theo scooted his chair just a touch closer, placing his arm on the back of her seat. She was a little panicked now, and wished she had thought to ask Draco about the rituals and etiquette of Death Eater dating. "I heard you've been stuck with the male Carrow."
She grunted automatically before covering her mouth, her eyes wide. But he just laughed. "Oh, trust me – no one has fond memories of either Carrow." He shivered outwardly as if to reinforce that.
She took her shot and exhaled sharply after swallowing. "It's been quite the experience," she confirmed – which was true. Just not a pleasant experience. "I just wish I could learn more."
"Like what?" he asked; his eyes lit up, and she looked at him curiously.
"Oh, everything. Draco taught me some charms when we were on the run, but I'm sure there are so many more. And I've done some reading on transfiguration and potions – the sheer breadth of what magic can do is incredible," Hermione gushed, and she suddenly felt self-conscious. But Theo had such an easygoing way about him that it was easy for her to forget herself and Draco's warnings.
"I know what you mean." He leaned back in his chair and grabbed two larger drinks. "Butterbeer," he explained. "I was so disappointed when I realized we wouldn't be learning at Hogwarts properly. I'm a bit of a nerd, if you haven't realized."
She shook her head, curious now. "So what's your favorite bit of magic?"
"Oh, that's a loaded question." He frowned, thinking. "I've always found Ancient Runes fascinating."
"Ancient Runes?" she asked.
He nodded. "It's an old form of magic, more ritualistic. The power of symbols and nature really. But it's quite fascinating."
"Sounds incredible," she said, her mind wandering at the words 'old magic.' "Can you recommend any books?"
He smiled and took a sip of his butterbeer. "I'll tell you what, perhaps you can swing by my place after your – studies – sometime this week, and I'll lend you a few?"
She froze, her mouth falling open and her hand clenching her drink. "Oh, I don't think that would be appropriate."
He laughed. "It's perfectly acceptable for a lady to go over to a friend's house to borrow a book."
"Well, I'll, uh, I'll see what I can do." She gave a slight smile and then frowned, looking around frantically.
"What is it?" Theo asked, concerned.
"Are there any toilets in here?"
He chuckled and pointed to the far left corner. "Yes, we're not animals."
She thanked him and hurried in the direction he pointed. Like the rest of the place, it had seen better days, but unlike the London pubs, it was definitely clean, so there was that. As she was heading out of the cubicle, she heard a lock and her eyes went wide, her hand moving automatically to her wand.
"Hermione." She heaved a sigh of relief when she saw Draco, standing by the sinks, a serious look on his face.
"You scared me! What are you doing here? These are the girls' toilets!" For whatever reason, this was the only thing that stuck in her mind in that moment – the one thing she could fully grasp.
He had his back against the sink and grabbed her, kissing her roughly. She responded immediately, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him down to her, trying her best to ignore the bright lights and porcelain sinks. His tongue traced her lower lip before lightly biting it. She moaned into his mouth, pressing herself into him when she heard a 'thump' as something hit the sink.
"What are we doing?" she whispered, placing her hands on his chest and stepping back.
"I missed you," he told her, bringing his hand to her cheek, his thumb brushing her scar. And whether she was willing to admit it or not, she missed him too. She leaned into his touch, her eyes shutting at the feel of his hand. He pulled her to him again and she gave in, pressing herself fully against him, their kisses rough and urgent. She ground herself against his leg, frustrated at their height difference when he turned her and picked her up, placing her on the sink.
She undid her robe, not caring if it was soaking wet and opened her legs suggestively. On some level, she recognized this was not her – she may not be a prude but she did not make a habit of shagging men in bathrooms. But she had to admit, sitting on the edge of the sink, feeling Draco gasp into her mouth as she gazed into his lust filled eyes, perhaps she should reconsider.
He took off his own robe, letting it fall to the floor. "Draco, we have to hurry up," she told him, pulling his trousers and boxers off in one motion and then taking care of her own, completely overcome with need. She pulled him back to her by his tie roughly, her trousers dangling at her ankles precariously.
He groaned and pressed his hand to her core. "I think you missed me too," he whispered in her ear, placing two fingers within her immediately. She pulled his lips down to hers, and he removed his fingers and immediately buried himself in her.
"Holy shit," she moaned as he entered her. She wrapped her legs around his waist, her arms around his neck for support and her arse on the edge of the porcelain sink. Hermione didn't know if it was because this was 'forbidden,' or perhaps because they were in a public toilet,but the experience was like nothing she'd had before. She leaned into his rhythm, their position providing pressure in just the right places.
"Draco, please, harder," she whispered to him, attempting to pull him closer as he quickened his pace.
She was close. She moved her legs so her feet were grabbing his knees, thrusting her hips and chest forward. He started placing light kisses along her neck and down the small bit of chest her shirt didn't cover. She moved her hands back, placing them on the back of the sink, her sense of equilibrium growing unsteady. His pace grew more chaotic and she could tell he was close. Lost in the moment, she reached down and rubbed herself along with Draco's rhythm, his mouth on hers the only thing that kept her from screaming out as they found their release in tandem.
She pushed him off abruptly. "We have to get back," she mumbled in his mouth and he simply nodded. The pair redressed and straightened themselves out. Suddenly hyperaware of their surroundings, she looked at him. "This was stupid."
"I just saw you with–"
"No," Hermione interrupted. "We're playing a dangerous game in this place."
"You weren't exactly complaining." He smirked at her.
She shook her head, softening slightly. "I know." She placed her hand on the door and paused. "Wait a couple of minutes before you come out."
She headed back to the table and Theo smiled at her, completely oblivious, and offered her another drink. She saw Millie and Vince, immersed in one other and probably unaware she and Draco were even missing. But then she saw Astoria giving her a soft knowing smile, and she felt her face go red.
This was a dangerous game they played, indeed.
A/N: Alphabet appreciation to ElizColl, Art3misia and astrangefan. WEA 101 and other shenanigans are up on my Tumblr at canttouchthis87.
Reviews are much appreciated!