Note: This chapter was surprisingly quick to edit compared to the last one, so I'm pleased to provide a second chapter for the weekend...
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DAY 32 – Exploration
Chapter 34 – Unexpected Interest
She had grass on her trousers and goat hair stuck to it, but Seeal managed to brush most of it off. She'd had a lot of fun playing with the baby goats today and their antics continued to amuse. Their favourite game remained leaping up onto anything they could see, but, now they were getting bigger, they could jump up a surprising height. They didn't always make it, but that didn't seem to stop the goatlings and their unending boundless energy.
Today, she'd been leaning forward to scratch around Splodge's little ears, when an unidentified goatling had knocked her over. She'd tumbled to the grass face first, Splodge fortunately dodging quickly out the way, and as soon as she'd rolled onto her back the goatlings had rushed in thinking it was a game. Tickling goatling noses and toes had jumped all over her, constantly moving and bleeting, and Splodge had snuffled all round her face. She'd laughed near hysterically at it all and as she turned back over and managed to push up onto her hands and knees, the goatlings had started leaping up onto the new shelf that was her back. Springing on and off her, goatling faces snuffling at her hair and several of them trying to push through under her stomach to race around her, she'd just laughed. Neligan had witnessed the whole thing and had come rushing over to her, clearly worried she'd hurt herself, but had started laughing too when he'd seen she was okay. He'd had to help her get up and the goatlings had finally lost interest in their 'climbing Seeal' game, which had actually felt rather like a big ticklish massage. Finally upright, she'd had to take a tissue from Neligan to wipe tears and some grass from her face as she'd watched the goatlings rushing off to their next game.
Which had turned out to be a more destructive game. Neligan had been helping her brush grass off her shoulders and back when they'd heard a loud crash of breaking wood. They'd looked round to see several goatlings scattering away from the obviously broken section of fencing around their hut. She suspected the goatlings had tried to jump over the enclosure fencing, which, as she and Neligan had decided, probably wasn't high enough for them anymore. The hut inside the enclosure had been perfectly sized for Belka and the goatlings when they had been newborns, but now the goat family was clearly outgrowing the hut and its enclosure. She and Neligan had brainstormed some ideas and he'd promised to draw up some plans for Oneakka's approval. Until then though, they'd gotten some replacement wood panelling and, with the goatlings excitedly watching, they'd repaired the fence.
After all that was done, she'd headed straight here to the canteen for Late Meal which should leave her with enough time to get to her quarters and maybe change her clothes before she was due for her shift with Oneakka. Well, she said 'shift' but he didn't really need help anymore. He could stand up from his bed now and walk by himself, though it still looked slow and uncomfortable for him. Each evening he insisted on walking at least two laps around the circumference of his quarters while she was there, saying it was to help him build stamina. She could see that it would, but considering he had rehab sessions in the mornings in the Rehab Gym, which he walked to and from, and he had an afternoon session with the Physical Therapist in his quarters too, she was a little worried that he was overdoing things. However, he'd told her that it was important to have regular light exercise to recover from significant injuries, and since he clearly had more experience in rehab than her, she'd had to acquiesce on the subject.
Still, she kept a close eye on him as he circled the room with his slow and uncomfortable looking walk, just in case he fell or needed help back to his bed. She wasn't overly convinced that, if he did fall, that she could catch him. His height and wide frame made him heavy anyway, but he was putting muscle back on at an almost alarming rate. She hadn't even realised how much of it he'd lost through his injury until he'd started putting it back on. It was a good sign surely, though she'd felt a little weird about watching him so closely as he did his walks around the his quarters, studying the growing muscle across his arms and abdomen visible through his shirt, which somewhere along the line had possibly crossed the line from worried concern to appreciation.
The stupid soft feelings had been trying to rear their ugly head again the last few days. It was probably just because they'd been getting on so well, mainly because he'd been behaving himself. He hadn't started any arguments, had been perfectly polite, and had been keeping to his med plan, as he had promised; though there had been one near miss on that subject yesterday when she'd arrived for her evening time with him. As soon as she'd walked through the door, he'd launched into a clearly prepared set of arguments about why he felt one particular medication in his plan should be altered. He'd clearly been using a calm level tone, had shown her two graphs of data that, he felt, backed up his theory. She'd simply listed, just as calmly as he'd spoken, as she had sat down in her usual chair and looked at the graphs he'd shown her. When he'd finished his opening arguments, she'd reminded him that he'd promised to keep to the whole plan with no alterations. He'd countered with his repeated argument that a warrior must adapt to changing circumstances. So, she'd asked if Healer Meiyo had agreed with his idea on the change of meds. He'd frowned, looked away and changed the subject, admitting his defeat without saying it out loud. She'd not made a fuss of her winning yet again, but had been pretty pleased that he'd not pushed things and that he hadn't sulked or gotten grumpy about it. Though she'd asked Halling to double-check that Oneakka had stuck with his med plan today, and Halling had reported that he had. Still, she'd subtly check his daily medication pot when she was there later, just to be sure.
It was almost weird seeing Oneakka so relaxed, no glares, no attempts to assert his dominance over things; though perhaps his insisting on circling his quarters was a touch of that. Still, he'd been really good company the last few days, and she'd enjoyed being back on evening shifts with him. The day's duties were done and, perhaps, he was more relaxed because he was tired at the end of his rehab-filled days. Either way, things had been good, with just easy playful banter and yesterday they'd started on a new Earth jigsaw game Sheppard had sent to him.
The long queue for the Late Meal food selection in the canteen shifted forward a pace, so she idly took a step forward. The canteen was seriously busy this evening. A good half of the room were filled with Recruits, all now looking far more relaxed than in recent weeks. Massa said all the Recruits had recently gone through their big twice yearly assessments in all subjects and physical fighting skills, and clearly now the pressure was off. No one was studying quietly by themselves and the canteen was back to a more usual chatter, with staff, Recruits and some Elite filling almost every table in the large room. Everyone looked pretty relaxed around here lately actually. Even Massa had looked like he'd taken something strong this morning when she'd shared First Meal with him, as he'd been beaming. He'd said it was because of a teething ring Aki had started using yesterday and that it allowed the two males an almost full night's sleep. Though the rest of the canteen didn't have that reason, but it was rather nice to see everyone smiling and cheerful. It was so very different to how things had been on Dream. When there had been too many smiles around the station it had always foretold something big and bad brewing.
She had to wonder if Oneakka's recent good mood wasn't just because of his rapidly accelerating recovery, but perhaps also linked to her guardian knife that had turned out to have been made by his actual father. She hadn't been able to stop thinking about her old knife since; the weird coincidence of her having had something Oneakka's father had made was just bizarre. What were the chances of that happening?
She'd been hoping that Oneakka would end up keeping the knife, that she'd just never mention it or ask for it back, so that it would just naturally become his. But, in usual form, Oneakka didn't do what you predicted, and had returned the knife to her after only two days. She'd offered for him to keep it longer, but he'd simply smiled and said that he "didn't need it anymore". She had no idea what that had meant, but the smile had been nice, so she'd taken back her knife without further comment. Well, until she had seen the amazing job he'd done cleaning the old knife for her. She'd thought the knife had aged well while shut away in her case all these years, but now it shone like it was brand new again.
Oneakka had made her promise to start using the knife in her daily life, so she'd gotten a box for it to live in on her table in her quarters. However, when she'd told him, he told her the knife needed to be out in view, as she wouldn't use the knife if it was out of sight. So, the knife now lived on top of the box, sat on the nice purple cloth it had been wrapped in when Oneakka had returned it to her. Each day since Oneakka asked her if she'd used the knife, so she'd actually started to use it. Yesterday she'd used it to cut thread when she'd adjusted and repaired two of her old tops from her case that she'd had washed, and today she'd used the knife to neatly slice some pages out of her red covered pit fighting notes journal. She'd been going through the journal, cutting out some sections that were from nastier fights and held dark memories, and then took great satisfaction in tearing up the pages into little pieces before dumping them in the waste chute. And once today's pages had been removed, she'd rested the guardian knife back on its purple enthroned box and almost felt like thanking it. It was just a tool, a weapon; there was no blade spirit living in it like Oneakka's people had – and maybe he too – believed. Still, she found herself looking at the knife a lot, feeling occasionally like it was looking at her. That was either a sign that she was losing it, or probably because it had been made by Oneakka's father and it was so brightly polished now that it caught the light in her quarters almost constantly.
She couldn't imagine what it would be like finding something from her own lost father, what that would feel like. It had clearly shocked Oneakka, because he'd dropped the knife when he'd first realised what it was, and she'd never seen him drop anything before. As he'd then told her about his people's beliefs about metal tools and weapons, had described the maker's mark on the hilt and how it related to his family history, there had been tears still shining across his cheeks and his voice had been soft and almost reverent. That Oneakka had then, only two days later, been able to return the precious knife to her, and with a smile no less, confused her. But then he'd seemed so relaxed since, contented even, more so than he had in...well, since she'd known him.
The food queue moved forward a pace again.
It was a good thing he was feeling better, not something for her to fuss over. It was probably just because it was new, unexpected, and...nice. She wasn't used to things being calm and nice around her, she realised, glancing back around to the cheerfully filled canteen tables. Her life had been an ongoing series of dangerous, tense, and unpredictable moments, one feeding almost seamlessly into the next. Maybe she just wasn't used to things actually improving in her life?
The queue moved forward a step.
She peered down the line of the queue. She wasn't that far from the food now, but there appeared to be a discussion going on between some Recruits and one of the canteen servers. Something about the sweet foods at the end. Whatever, she pulled her small electronic pad out of her pocket and consulted the time display. She still had an hour until she needed to be with Oneakka. Though, it wasn't like he couldn't be left unsupervised anymore. He spent time by himself during the days now and no one stayed in his quarters with him overnight anymore.
Not unless Pampata had been coming into the Facility to visit without her hearing about it.
She frowned at that annoying wayward thought and tapped her pad further awake and glanced through the latest Project results from earlier in the day as she waited to get within arm's reach of the food. There wasn't anything new in the reports that she hadn't already read through, so she looked back down at her dirtied trouser leg again. Only to notice that there were some muddy goat footprints further around the back of her leg and, she angled herself to see better, yes, up over her backside! Well, that explained how the unidentified goat had pushed her over so easily. Honestly, those goatlings! She brushed her hand over the dirtied mess. She was definitely going to have to change her clothes before she sat with Oneakka now!
"Excuse me," a voice interrupted her mutterings at her backside. She looked up, guessing she'd gotten distracted from the queue moving forward, but the queue hadn't moved, so she looked further round to her right to find a familiar face from the Facility had joined her at the back of the queue. "Hello, Seeal," the security guard smiled at her.
This particular security man was a well known face for her since he'd fallen asleep while he was supposed to have been running security over the Project Room during the whole Rogue Hive crisis. Admittedly, she'd been the only person working in the Project Room at the time, so it had probably been a very boring shift for him since she studiously behaved herself now. Still, the Security Lead in her hadn't been able to let the moment pass and she'd woken him up by throwing a hard plastic cup up against the window of the observation room in which he'd been 'on duty'. He'd looked pretty sheepish for his nap and they had exchanged amused smiles anytime they'd seen each other in the Facility since.
"Sleepy," she greeted him with a teasing smile, glad for the opportunity to use the nickname she had been using in her head since.
He smiled back. "My name is Smee," he corrected her.
"No, I'm pretty sure it's 'Sleepy'," she corrected him in turn.
He closed his eyes briefly with an exaggerated wince. "Fine, yes, Sleepy."
She chuckled victoriously as the queue moved forward a pace. "You been keeping awake on shift lately?"
"Yes," Sleepy answered her as he moved forward the pace with her. "I should make it clear that I had been on duty for two whole days straight with no break on that particular occasion."
"No excuse when on security detail," she told him firmly, as she had so often told her former Dream and Lalwani staff.
He nodded slowly. "True, but you're hardly a threat."
She narrowed her eyes at him, feeling insulted. "How do you determine that exactly?" She challenged as the queue moved another two steps; she was almost within reach of the food.
"Please," he shrugged his shoulders dismissively. He was teasing her? "I've guarded enough people to see real trouble when I see it."
The queue moved forward again and she was finally level with the empty trays, so she picked one up, Sleepy Smee doing the same.
"Some people have described me as the definition of 'trouble'," she told him.
Smee shrugged again. "There are different types of trouble in the universe."
Mmm that had been delivered with an interesting tone. Sort of confident that he believed what he was saying, but with a hint of flirtatious teasing too.
"And what type of trouble am I?" She asked, curious at what he was going to say.
"The kind that you don't want to cross," he complimented her with a smile, "and should always have on your side."
She nodded her head with approval of that, though certain now that he definitely used a flirtatious tone that time. She reached for an empty bowl and plate for her tray, Sleepy reaching forward to do the same. As he did, he just slightly invaded her personal space and then moved back to a more polite distance as soon as he set his bowl and plate on his tray.
"Meaning you need me on your side for something," she interpreted the whole display. "Maybe because you fell asleep while on duty?"
"No, no that," he shook his head. "I reported my own nap session after it happened."
She was rather impressed to hear that.
Having finally arrived in front of actual food, she eagerly reached for one of the serving spoons and put a large helping of the cracked pepper vegetables into her bowl.
"Did you get punished for the nap?" She asked, curious how Edfu and Maja ran their staff here.
"They gave me the break off-rotation I needed after working so many long hours," he reported as he reached for a serving spoon.
"Good," she nodded as she considered the spread of food available this evening. There was a good choice; she wanted almost all of it. "Glad to hear it," she added as she put a half spoon of the spiced tabo chutney in her bowl.
"Do you want some of the Kita infused stew?" Sleepy asked, the serving spoon in his hand.
"Yes please," she agreed eagerly as she put the chutney spoon back and watched as Sleepy added a good spoonful of the stew to her bowl. "Thank you," she added, considering him. He was definitely after something. "So if it's not my help in avoiding punishment, what do you want?" She asked him straight as she reached for a big chunk of sweet grain bread.
"Nothing," he replied, but his tone was playfully innocent.
As she filled a cup with Athosian tea, she narrowed her eyes at him, letting him know she could see right through that.
"I was just wondering if I could join you for Late Meal," he added. "That's all."
Just an invitation to share dinner then? That didn't exclude the possibility that he was ultimately after a favour or fulfilling a dare maybe? On Dream some scum used to try that, betting each other who would get her to eat with them, let them touch her. She'd cottoned onto the stupid bets and had quickly seen the troublemakers away. One once with a broken jaw.
Sleepy smiled. "Unless you have somewhere to be, I understand," he added, providing her with a polite way to turn down his offer.
She considered his smile and open expression. He appeared genuine and his eye contact was direct and bright. In fact, very direct and full of echoes of the flirtation he'd used earlier.
A true simple invitation to share Late Meal then? She was a little surprised. No one had approached her with an offer like that in a very long time – ignoring drunks in the bars and clubs - and certainly no one here. The Recruits avoided her since the certain 'incident' that had required her putting a group of them in the Healing Bay and all of them punished by the Elite. The Facility Staff were polite to her if she worked with them in the Project Room, or they just blatantly ignored her if she didn't work with them.
"No, I don't have somewhere to be right now," she told him truthfully as she moved along the food selection to the sweet offerings at the end. There was something new today, big sweet looking biscuits with blue things baked into them. She consulted the little sign under the biscuits, but there were no warnings on reactions for her. How the medical staff knew what a Glisi was safe to eat she had no idea, but she'd seen the warning for her in the lists on a couple of dishes and she wasn't about to test their theories. But these new biscuits were fine, so she added one to her plate next to the sweet grain bread, and considered Sleepy Smee and his offer.
He placed a large fruit covered cupcake onto his tray and looked round at her.
"Just this meal though," she told him. "And I've got to leave here in," she lifted her pad, "in two quarters of an hour."
"Great," Sleepy named Smee replied with a grin as he lifted his tray. "Shall we sit by the large plant over there?"
She turned to the busy canteen and spotted the few free tables to one side that where indeed right next to one of the large potted plants. She'd asked Oneakka awhile ago about why the Elite had these big plants in here and the trees in the lobbies and he'd said it was for the same reason as the hydroponics bay: the plants cleaned the air and produced oxygen. Plus, she thought they kind of looked nice actually. Helped you forget that you were underground on a desolate moon with a limited atmosphere that you couldn't survive in more than a few metres beyond the Facility's walls.
Sleepy was already leading the way, but he glanced back a few times and didn't walk directly in front of her. It was some good body language to use, not just expecting her to be following him, he just happening to be in front.
She considered the man as he walked them towards table he had picked closest to the side wall and plants. She'd seen him on duty plenty of times of course, though not always looking over the Project Room. She's spotted early on here that Maja and Edfu had their security staff on a wider rotation, moving them through the different sections and duties within the Facility and out at the moon's Portal. It was a good structure, as it gave all staff experience in all elements of the base and stopped anyone getting too bored and indifferent in any one role.
As Smee reached the table, she considered his posture. He looked military trained to her eyes, his posture and style slightly different from most of the other security guards here, and there was some grey in his hair, but that didn't always indicate a clear age with some males. She guessed he was at least five yearly cycles older than her, maybe more. When he spoke he didn't have a clear accent, rather he had a telltale mix of accented words that told her he had moved around throughout his life, which was a little odd for career military. Normally in the Alliance, from what she understood, the planetary Fleet ships kept their own people stationed on their respective planetary ship; so Litan ships had Litan soldiers and Satedans ships had Satedan soldiers. If he'd been a Fleet frontline warrior, he should have a more distinct accent from his world.
At the table, he set his tray down in front of the chair facing them, leaving her with the chair on the other side of the table, which was the more strategic position with full view of the room. It had been a very clear choice for a security member and he was a making a point with letting her have the better seat. And it possibly suggested that he'd noticed that she always preferred to sit on that side of tables in the canteen, allowing her as full a view of the room as possible.
She headed round the table to her seat without comment, aware that he was still stood, perhaps waiting for her to sit first. She pulled out her seat without comment, but the small choices he'd made weren't lost on her. As she sat down, he did the same, confirming the polite gentlemanly behaviour.
"So, you're ex-military," she told him as she picked up her spoon to start on her stew. Large plant leaves blocked the space directly behind their table and covered part of the side wall to her right, which created a subtle of sense of privacy, which she guessed was another reason why he'd picked the table.
"I've heard you're an expert at reading people," Sleepy told her as he settled in his chair. "Want to give your opinion of me, see how close you get?" He challenged with a smile as he picked up his utensils.
"Alright," she accepted the challenge. "You're military trained," he nodded, "and you've seen close quarter combat," she estimated from what she'd seen of him when on duty. She'd noticed that his fellow security guards had a lot of respect for him, but she'd seen him smiling and joking with them so it wasn't just because he was of a higher rank.
"Correct," he confirmed.
She considered his expression. "But not for awhile," she estimated. "But you've had a long military career, moved around a lot; you weren't stationed just on one Alliance planet or one section of the Fleet."
"Impressive," he complimented her.
"You don't strike me as the adrenaline-seeking career military type though," she considered out loud.
He shook his head. "Definitely not."
She picked up her fork to start on her cracked pepper vegetable. "So, military, but you moved between bases and ships, and haven't been on the frontline in awhile; is that because you work here now?"
He shook his head as he scooped up some stew. "I've only been stationed here a little longer than you've been here."
"Then that's a little unusual," she concluded.
He nodded as he chewed on his food, but his eyes remained mostly on her, glittering with enjoyment.
She felt a faint flush at the approval in his gaze, but she focused on fulfilling the challenge. "You said you've had plenty of security guarding experience, which you seem to think means you can judge my threat level well," she added pointedly and he smiled. "So I'd say you were military security but you moved around the Fleet, why?"
"They do that when you police the military," he filled in her missing piece of information.
"You were Military Enforcement?" That sounded very interesting. "How did you end up on boring sleep-inducing duties here?"
He chuckled. "Only someone with your previous job would think working for the Elite as 'boring'."
"I didn't say working for the Elite was boring, but surely, compared to what you used to do, sitting watching rooms of scientists and the Facility's corridors isn't that challenging?"
"You've not had to run security watching over Elite Recruits before," he replied. "Trust me when I say, the project rooms detail are considered the relaxing part of our work here."
Actually that made some sense now she thought about it. Oneakka and Massa had told her a few stories of their youth as Recruits, and it had sounded like they had used to like pushing boundaries of their skills. Plus, Oneakka had told her of the time that, as a Recruit, he'd challenged a formidable Elite warrior to a fight and had ended up in the Healing Bay, and she'd split up a Recruit fight herself not that long ago. "They fight among themselves a lot then?" She asked.
"It's more of a case of them challenging each other," Smee replied, with a glance aside to assess how close any Recruits were to their table and able to overhear. There were mainly Facility staff close by, so she guessed Sleepy would feel safe talking about his work. "Elite Recruits, by their very nature, are naturally headstrong and need to push themselves."
She smiled at that summary. "I have heard some stories, but I didn't realise it was that rife."
"When you add in the fact that they're constantly being trained new fighting skills and battle techniques, practicing against each other all the time, it makes sense that a competitive response kicks in."
She nodded in understanding.
"Then," he continued with feeling now, "you add the fact that teenage hormones kick in while they're here," and Seeal smiled at his pained expression, "you can see why we're breaking up altercations on a near daily basis."
"I see," she considered. "So, dominancy, sexual competition, hierarchy of skills, and the fact that they're trying to become Elite warriors one day, all combine together into a sea of hormonally-driven determined people who think tactically from a young age and know how to kill each other with various weapons."
Smee grinned. "You can see how much fun it is, and far from boring."
"I stand corrected," she smiled. She hadn't actually thought about running security on Recruits really, despite Oneakka's stories and her own altercation with that group of Recruit idiots who had ambushed her. Massa did often mutter about the Recruit students he taught, but she'd always thought he'd meant they were difficult in class. Instead, as one of the teachers here, was Massa having to break up fights as well?
Now that she thought about it, the Elite training programme took young males and females with already naturally advanced skills of various descriptions, trained them up from children through their most naturally tumultuous hormonal years, to do a job that was terrifying and would result in most of them dying young, was it a surprise that they would be challenging.
"I think I'd prefer Dreamstation," she joked, but she didn't really mean it. Actually Smee's job sounded quite interesting.
Sleepy chuckled at that. "I imagine that was a particularly interesting security environment?"
He seemed honestly interested with that question and, considering his background and experience, he would probably understand much of what she had faced on Dream.
"'Interesting' does not really capture the headache it was," she answered.
"How many did you run on security detail there?" Smee asked, definitely interested in hearing about it. As she answered, he nodded and asked more questions, all of them insightful. After all, no one quite understood a security member's view of the world more than another security member.
He seemed a nice enough man, clearly intelligent and experienced. He also seemed relaxed and with no obvious signs of an ulterior motive as yet, outside of the sparkle of interest he wasn't trying very hard to hide anymore.
He was also not all that bad to look at. He was about the same height as her, had dark hair and eyes, a nice smile, and clearly got all his sleep.
As they talked, she rather started enjoying herself, especially as he started telling her about his own career path. It was rather nice to meet someone new actually, someone from outside her Strays group or an Elite. Someone who had a closer life experience to her own.
He started telling an amusing story about a time he ran a protection detail for a High Councillor visiting a military base, and she laughed at his pointed comments, understanding what that kind of work entailed. She responded by telling him about an incident where someone had tried to attack a club she had worked back before she'd moved onto Dream. She'd been working as door security for the club when a rather shifty looking man had tried to enter. It had turned out that the man had been an Alliance politician and he'd been getting his jollies by visiting seedy clubs out beyond the border. The problem was that his wife had found out about it and had tracked him down during that particular visit.
Smee laughed as she told how she and three other bouncers had tried to subdue the infuriated woman as she had stormed through the club, pushing over tables and shoving people over as she tracked down her husband. They'd finally managed to wrestle the woman to the floor as she screamed obscenities at her husband who had been cowering behind a gambling table.
"Was that where you started your security career then?" Sleepy asked as he sipped at his drink, his eyes moving across her face.
"No," she answered him, "I started learning what I needed when I was far younger." But telling him about her petty thieving days was too personal. How they had led to her first job when she'd been about ten yearly cycles and she'd started watching over a stall to stop others stealing from it. At the end of each day, the lady stall runner had paid her with two pieces of currency and a basket of leftover fruit from her stall. Seeal had shared the fruit with other street kids who were friends, and of course with Ulfur. But that all felt too private to share with this man she hardly knew.
But it was clear that he wanted to know her a lot more. It had been quite a long time, well apart from Myrtle's seductive superficial offer, since a male had so overtly shown interest in her. Had taken the time to invite her to share food and share stories. Smee was far more 'average' in his height and appearance compared to the Elite males she normally spent her time with now, though he filled out his uniform in the way all the staff here did. Everyone here worked out in the gyms and surely a long career working in the military had led Smee to keep in good shape. He wasn't the big lean muscles of the Elite, but he was fit and healthy looking, and he seemed honestly interested in her.
His unspoken invitation to where this conversation could go seemed to fill the air around her and she found herself comparing the offer to Myrtle's previous more specific version. She'd turned down Myrtle, though she'd been a little tempted, but things had changed since that decision.
Lingering soft feelings that she'd managed to mostly crush.
And she knew about Pampata now.
With Zio now out of her life too, was it perhaps time to consider an offer from a male again? Did she even want to? She had promised herself to not get herself enslaved to the needs and demands of another dominant male in her life. Another Ulfur, pit fight runner, or Creass. Her life was her own to choose now and, though she had no idea where her life would lead once the project work was complete for the Elite, she wanted every freedom available to her for when that day arrived.
But Smee didn't seem all that much of a conflict to all that. He seemed to be offering something less demanded on her, more...normal.
He wasn't a criminal, pit fighter or a tea shop owner who wanted her to be his W word. He wasn't someone she was duty-bound to through blood, obligation, or history. He was new, clean.
Uncomplicated.
Not a big muscular hero who had almost bled to death in front of her. Who required all her energy and focus to keep up with his fast mind, challenging behaviour, and sudden unpredictable smiles. Who had a female already and a dangerous life purpose.
A path that was obviously going to get him killed sooner rather than later.
She would be stupid to judge other males against Oneakka. Because how could they compare? In every way Smee was less than him, but, in other ways, Smee was so much more present, available, and possible.
And his eyes and smile whispered of passion that she'd not had in what felt like a long time now.
Considering her new life of freedom and uneventful contented times, maybe this was the best opportunity to consider this type of offer.
And his invitation to 'do this again' when her pad alerted her to her set deadline of two quarters of an hour.
She thanked him for his company and shared stories as she wrapped her uneaten blue dotted biscuit up in her napkin to take with her. And then, on impulse, she'd agreed it would be nice to share a meal again sometime.
He'd looked very pleased as she'd said goodbye and headed away through the canteen towards the exit. As she walked, she felt a faint tickle at the back of her neck that made her suspect he was watching her leave. As she reached the exit, she felt the compulsion to look back towards him, to consider him and his average and kind face...but she didn't.
As she made her way through the Facility to her quarters, she felt kind of odd about the experience now she was by herself again. Worry niggled somewhere at the back of her brain, an old familiar warning system that told her to be careful about males with intentions. Not just because of the type on Dream, but that even kind Zio had turned demanding and judging, and that she'd endangered him just by association. But Smee didn't seem anything like Zio, and he certainly wasn't the clearly sexual womaniser that Myrtle was. As she turned down the last corridor towards her home, she imagined a scenario where she ended up spending a lot of time with Smee, becoming lovers. She tried to imagine what that would be like, how it might change her life and future decisions.
At her quarters, she waved her wrist over the door sensor and it slid open. She dumped her pad on her bed, set the wrapped biscuit on top, and began quickly pulling off her trousers and top. She considered the back of the clothes now they were off her. Muddy goat footprints covered the back of both top and trousers, and she idly realised everyone in the canteen would have seen them. Still, it clearly hadn't put off Sleepy Smee.
She threw the clothes aside, and her gaze fell on her shiny Ugun guardian knife.
Looking at her again.
Unbidden, the soft feelings stirred again, and, stupidly, she let them a little. And, as so often happened when she did this, she felt the rushing compulsion to hurriedly pack up her things and run away from here. The old instinctive urge to panic and run from what seemed so big and dangerous to her was an even older companion than the knife. Born from old snow-filled memories and the blood splattered pit where her first lover had died in front of her.
Instincts that had protected her in incalculable ways over the years.
Warning her of pain, danger, and disappointment.
Like feeling for a big stubborn oaf who was just going to go race off back to war the second his wounds were healed. Whose single life purpose was to battle Wraith and, now, Skerti.
An Elite warrior through to his core.
He barely spent any time with his female either, so clearly he wasn't all that invested in those kinds of ties.
That was all good because it gave her confidence in letting herself just enjoy their friendship. As long as she didn't let these feelings loose and instead remembered the pain and grief at his bedside when they'd all thought he was dying. When she'd tightly held his limp hand and all but begged him not to die. Not to leave her and Halling.
Because that was the future, regardless of feelings. Because a day would arrive surely when the news could arrive that he'd been killed, and she didn't think she could stay living in this Facility knowing that he would never again appear around a corner.
She clamped down hard the feelings, crushing down on the rising lump in her throat as she tore her eyes off the Ugun knife. She headed quickly into her bathroom to assess the state of her hair. She frowned at her reflection in the mirror. It looked okay, though she pulled a few strands of grass out from the hairbands holding it all up.
Her healthy fleshed out face looked back at her as she pulled her hair free and started brushing it through.
"Annoying male," she muttered as she focused on the task. "Stupid female," she corrected, knowing she was annoyed at herself really.
As they had agreed during the single sideways conversation she and Oneakka had actually had on the matter, an Elite warrior and a pit fighter would never work.
Not that he wanted it to.
And neither did she.
She gathered her hair up into one long tail at the back of her head and tied a hairband around it all.
So, why shouldn't she maybe take up Sleepy's offer? She'd liked talking security with him, getting to hear about his life. And clearly soon the Sythus would be leaving, taking Halling, Madesh and the rest of the Strays off to go hunt monsters without her. It would be nice to have a new friend to spend time with, if nothing else.
She was nowhere near the soft seductively shaped femininity of Pampata, but it had felt really flattering the way Smee had looked at her. It felt a long time since she'd felt...wanted. Properly desired.
There was no harm in having another meal with him and maybe thinking about sharing more.
It might even keep the soft feelings in their place and allow her to just enjoy her friendship with Oneakka without complication.
To have a new Zio to be a safe place to go.
A male Pampata of her own.
00000
TBC