Chapter 35- Shore Seawind
"Jump in with me!" Thalassa is treading water beside the pier; I'm lying on my stomach watching her. "Jump in with me, Shore!"
"Maybe I want to stay dry," I say. Thalassa looks up at me and smiles, her red hair somehow not damp but in waves around her face.
"I know you; you love the ocean more than you love me." She laughs and splashes water at me.
"Not true," I laugh. "I've never loved anything as much as I love you."
"What about your own life?" she asks, her face growing serious. "Would you give your own life for me?"
"Without hesitation." I sit up on my knees; the pier seems to be growing taller, or the ocean is sinking; either way Thalassa is falling farther and farther away from me. Her happiness has changed to terror, and it hurts me in the pit of my stomach.
"Help me! Shore!" she screams. As the pier shoots upwards, I throw myself off of it, falling down into the ocean below…
My eyes open and I'm flat on my back on an unknown beach; the sun's already beating down hot and bright. I grip the ground in an attempt to bring myself back to reality, and grasp only sand, which slips through my fingers.
"You slept for a long time," Aggie says, stomping on the remaining coals of last night's fire.
I sit up. "You could have woken me up, you know."
"You're prettier when you sleep," she says, then crow laughs. I run my hand through my hair; it will never lie down properly. Ma used to comb it every night when I was a kid, but it never made a difference.
"Where're Tiara and Dominicus?" I ask, looking around and noticing that Aggie and I are alone.
"They went off to see if they could find some water," she says, picking up a charcoaled stick and drawing it through the sand, making patterns of swirls and stars. "They took most of the water bottles with them, so if they do find anything they'll bring it back."
"And you trust them to do that?" I ask, grabbing my trident from where I left it last night.
"You don't?" Aggie asks, tilting her head. "We figured that you would want to find water today anyway, so we just got a jump start on it. You alright with that, Ocean Boy?"
"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine with that," I say. "We're going to need some food today, though."
"What are you looking at ordering?" Aggie says, a sly smile on her face. "A roast, some potatoes, a few greens and we can call it a meal? Top it off with a bottle of wine and we'll have the best damn meal in the arena."
"I'm thinking more along the lines of seafood," I say, allowing myself a smile. "I think a roast would be harder to get out here."
"You'd go in there, with the sharks?" Aggie asks, pointing with her charcoal stick at the waves that are washing up on the beach. I'll never get tired of hearing the sound of water, never.
"I doubt it's all sharks. I can pull some fish and some other shellfish from down there."
"Be my guest; I'm not going in there." Aggie shakes her head. "Not after Cloak. Or Kelpie."
"I thought you couldn't wait to see Kelpie dead," I say, pushing the words out like they're heavy weights. Kelpie Agan is dead and I couldn't help her.
"The way she went out wasn't any fun," Aggie says, dropping the charcoal stick and picking up one of her daggers. "I'll have more fun once we track down that District 3 girl."
"Like you've said before," I say, standing up and brushing sand off of my pants and jacket. Do I trust Aggie to not run when I dive? Or should I wait until the others come back? If they wanted to ditch me, they all could have left together, or killed me in my sleep.
"And I'll keep saying it until we find her."
"There was a cannon earlier, wasn't there?" I say. "What if that was the girl you're looking for?"
Aggie makes a face. "Then I hope whoever took her out had as much fun with her as I would have had."
"Right." The look in Aggie's eyes makes me trust her less and less. She's a puzzle; yesterday she was almost comforting while we watched Kelpie swim out, even kind. Today she's a brutal murderer. It's fascinating, but also worrying. I'll never know who she will be one minute to the next, which makes her very volatile. If I had the guts to do it, I should kill her now. But I won't.
Mags wanted me to use my allies until they couldn't help me any longer. And as terrible as it sounds, Aggie and the others are still useful to me. So they stay alive.
"Look who's got water!" Tiara sings as she steps out of the jungle. Aggie and I immediately tense, our weapons held tight in our hands, until we realize it's only our allies and not a threat.
"Don't kill us now," Dominicus says, smirking as he follows after Tiara. "I doubt my family would like that very much, Agrippina."
"Shut up and quit making so much noise. You want the whole arena coming down here?" Aggie asks, snatching a water bottle from him and drinking deeply from it. Tiara passes me one and I drink down the lukewarm water. Not satisfying, but it'll keep us alive.
"Ocean Boy here is going to go get some fish for us," Aggie says, capping the water bottle and putting it down in the sand.
"Good luck with that," Tiara says. "I'm not going anywhere near the water again."
"Dominicus, you coming?" I ask. I know he won't, so I'm not surprised when he shakes his head.
"You have a death wish, go ahead."
I pull my boots off and tuck my socks inside, leaving them behind on the beach. I take my trident with me, and that's all. "Fine by me," I say, as I walk into the surf; I can hear Aggie crow laugh behind me, before I wade in farther and farther, until I'm deep enough to swim, and then deep enough to dive.
I'm home.
The water is clear, much clearer than the water in District 4, but the feeling's the same: pure freedom; that's what the ocean brings. I twist and spiral down to the bottom, blowing bubbles out of my nose, searching for the right fish in the schools of them around me. The floor of the reef is speckled with coral and shells; I recognize oysters and clams, not because I've hunted for them myself, but because I've seen them brought onto the dock by the other fishermen.
Running out of air; I seize an oyster and come up to the surface, shaking my head of water. Aggie, Dominicus, and Tiara are sitting on the beach, watching me and talking amongst themselves. They can talk; I can fish. Switching my trident to my left hand, I throw the oyster onto the beach with my right; Aggie looks up, but before I can see what she does, I've dived back into the waves.
It really does feel like home beneath the surface, even though the surroundings themselves are different. Water is water, and that's where I'm most comfortable. The Gamemakers must have tailored this arena for District 4 this year.
I've grabbed a large pink crab and am on my way up again when I remember Kelpie; this is how she died, alone in the water that should have saved her, should have reminded her of home. And I remember how the ocean has taken twice and given nothing in return but an oyster and a crab. A crab for two lives?
The ocean is supposed to be fair, but it doesn't seem fair right now. And it doesn't seem as benevolent as it did a few minutes ago. I come up to the surface and throw the crab onto the sand, where Aggie retrieves it, before I dive down again, picking off a few smaller fish and another oyster. That's all I can stand to get right now; the water's changed and it makes me uneasy.
As I break the surface, a wave slams me back down; bubbles churn around me as I somersault under the water, keeping a tight grip on the oyster and trident in my hands. I come up again, only to get slammed under; my lungs are screaming for air. I swear, if the ocean kills me…
I get a flashback to another time when the ocean nearly took me; I was six years old, on the Jewel. We were sailing home in a storm, and a wave washed over the side of the boat and took me back with it. I distinctly remember the feeling of helplessness, the waves pulling me under until Da fished me out.
It's the same as now, except there's no Da to help me.
I feel the wave slam down again, but this time I swim up after it; the ocean can't be defeated, but I can work with it. And I haven't lived in District 4 my whole life for nothing. When the next wave comes, I'm above the water, and I let it wash me onto the beach, coughing and choking on seawater.
"Get what you were looking for?" Aggie calls out sardonically. Still coughing I bring myself to my knees, then chuck the oyster at her. Luckily I'm still holding the trident with the fish impaled on it; otherwise my whole fishing trip would have been completely counterproductive.
"There's supper," I say. "Hope you enjoy."
"How're we supposed to get into these things anyway?" Tiara asks, grabbing the oyster from Aggie and turning it over and over in her hand.
"Ocean Boy'll show us, won't you now?" Aggie says, looking at me. "Once he quits drowning on dry land, anyway." She laughs, that mean laugh that's starting to get on my nerves. I cough a couple more times, spitting saltwater onto the sand, then I get myself to my feet and walk as confidently as I can over to my allies.
"Yeah, I'll show you," I say. My throat feels raw; the whole ocean here feels wrong now. This isn't my ocean, not my water. Everything surrounding this island is a Capitol illusion and trap, just like the horizon was for Kelpie. Kelpie, who should never have been reaped in the first place.
My ocean wouldn't take for a third time when it's given almost nothing back.
"Give it here," I tell Tiara, holding my hand out to her. She plunks the oyster into my hand and watches while I sit down next to her, dropping my trident next to me. Grabbing a knife from the sand, I shove the tip of the knife into the oyster's crack and twist it open with a snap. "Here's your oyster."
"That's horrible looking," Dominicus bluntly says behind me.
"Shore, I'm not eating that," Tiara says, one eyebrow raised higher than the other. She might not now, but if she gets hungry enough she'll be begging for oysters later. I'd rather not push the issue now, though; not with our alliance as fragile as it is.
"Fine. I will then," I tell her. She shudders as I pry the oyster from its shell and swallow it down. It tastes like home; salty like the sea. Ma used to make baked oysters for special occasions, like my aunt's wedding. Haven't had them in a long time, though; most of the harvest goes to the Capitol.
"So are we staying here or what?" Aggie asks; I turn to look at her. She gestures around the beach like I'm too stupid to figure out what she means.
"Yeah. Let's stay here for a bit, get some food and water into us. No point going into the jungle until we're ready." Even though the ocean is an illusion, I still feel better staying near it. I've grown up near water; I know next to nothing about jungles. Stick to what you know is what I say, and what Da says too.
"Who's left anyway?" Tiara asks, leaning forward and digging her water bottle deeper into the sand.
"Us, obviously," Dominicus says.
"Yeah, obviously." Tiara rolls her eyes. "Us and who else? District 3's probably still kicking around."
"Kid from 8," I suggest. "Hard to say with the cannon earlier."
"District 3 boy got himself impaled, I'll bet," Dominicus says with a murderous smile. Him and Aggie; those are the two who I trust the least. Unfortunately, that leaves me with only one ally that I can vaguely trust, which isn't optimal.
"How'd he get to Day 3 anyway?" Tiara asks. "Wimpy little kid; I was expecting to see him at the bloodbath."
"Both him and his partner," Aggie says, picking up one of her knives and twirling it through her fingers. "I'm going to have some fun with both of them, just as soon as I can get my hands on them."
"As you've said before," I point out. About a million times.
"And as I've said before, I'll stop talking about it when the two of them are dead. Them and the pretty girl from 7. Once they're gone, the real fun can start."
"What's that supposed to mean, Agrippina?" Dominicus asks, flipping his water bottle so that it lands right side up in the sand.
Aggie cocks her head to the side and gives an innocent smile that fools nobody. "Then we get to have a proper party with a cake, Dommie."
"Aren't we lucky," Tiara says, rolling her eyes again as she lies down, arms under her head, and looks up at the sky. We really are lucky; there's not a cloud for miles, which means we're not going to get drenched from above any time soon. Not that it really matters for me; I'm soaked from getting the seafood.
"So, Ocean Boy," Aggie says, driving the point of her knife deep into the beach. "Your arena girlfriend's gone, so why don't you tell us about your District 4 girl?"
"Kelpie wasn't my girlfriend," I say, but I can feel my voice dropping lower. I don't know what Kelpie was to me; friend, ally, a girl I pitied. A girl I still feel guilt for, over the fact that I couldn't stop her from dying. But she was never the kind of girl that Thalassa is for me.
"Whatever. You're seventeen; why're you tying yourself down so soon? Don't you want to play the field a bit more, if you know what I mean?" Aggie asks.
I force a laugh; I'm not going to show them what I'm really feeling. I'm the leader, I'm District 4's victor, and victors don't have feelings towards their dead allies.
Maybe Mags does, I don't know. But Mags is different.
"When you know, you know. Why wait to do something that you already know you're going to do eventually anyway?" Why are we even discussing her here?
"What's your girl's name again?" Tiara asks, tilting her head to look at me.
"Thalassa."
"Hope that works out for you," Dominicus says sarcastically.
"Yeah? Me too," I reply as cheerfully as I can. I know I can't trust any of them, not if I really want to get home. Thalassa is all that matters, and I'll get home to her one way or another.
Every one of my allies who sits on this beach with me will have to die first, though.