Chapter 35: King's Cross Station

AN: Here are the translations of the Swedish words and phrases that appear in this chapter:

"Min lilla Kersti Långstrump" means "my little Kersti Longstocking"

"Mamma, han är en gubbe" means "Mom, he's an old man"

"Nej" means "no"

My apologies to any Swedish speakers if I got anything wrong!

Saturday, December seventeenth dawned with cloudy skies but no rain. I dragged myself out of bed, feeling extremely tense and ill-rested, and packed my Muggle satchel before I went down to the last meal before Christmas break. I didn't bother packing a trunk, as there was nothing I needed to bring. I would be keeping all my things for school at Hogwarts, and I would need to get rid of most of my possessions at my Muggle house anyway. I would have no use or space for them after I obliviated my family, not to mention that I would have to get rid of any evidence of them having had a daughter before I wiped their memories. I couldn't have them wandering through the house, getting confused as to why there were extra shoes or a room with pictures of them with a redhead girl whom they no longer knew as their daughter. In sum, I would have to erase all evidence of my existence from not only their minds, but their house.

I didn't manage to choke down anything but a cup of tea at breakfast, not when what lay ahead for me was hanging over my head like an immovable storm cloud. I'd crammed any helpful notes about memory charms that I wanted to review, as well as a Muggle novel for the train ride, into my satchel. I'd also reducio-ed a change of Muggle clothes, since I wanted to change out of my wizarding robes on the train. My brother always teased me incessantly if I let him see me in my robes, not to mention that I didn't want to look extremely out of place after I walked through the barrier to the Muggle side of the train station. I'd never live it down if I walked through crowds of Muggles wearing my robes, my brother would make sure of it.

A few professors escorted us to Hogsmeade station as usual, and remained there to make sure that all the students who had wished to return home had safely boarded the train, with no belongings left behind. Tess staked out a compartment for the four of us to sit in, the three of them talking excitedly about all the things that they were going to get up to over the break. I sat in the window seat, using the opposite one as a footrest, and cracked open my novel. I hadn't been sitting there long, eyes focused on the page, when the sound of the compartment door opening drew me away.

Lily was leaning forward with both hands on the door frame, smiling at us. "Hi, sorry. I was sent to collect Kersti, so I'll be unfortunately stealing her from you. With her consent, of course."

"Where am I going?" I asked, though I was by no means afraid for myself. It was Lily taking me away, afterall.

She smiled, her bright green eyes twinkling. "A certain boy has requested your presence in our compartment, and so did I."

I sat up straight. "Sirius actually asked you that?"

"No, not in so many words. Er, not verbally at least. So not really. But when I mentioned I was going to see you, he perked up so that speaks for itself. I reckon he would've asked me to bring you along if he hadn't been in front of the boys, you know how James teases him and all that."

Emily and Lia burst into giggles and snogging noises. "Get out of here, you goofs," I said, making a shooing motion at them.

Tess cleared her throat pointedly across from me. I looked at her and nudged her leg with my foot. "Hey, Tess."

"If you're asking for my approval, I don't care either way," she said, not lowering her quidditch magazine from in front of her face. "Just because I'm your friend, doesn't mean I control you." She finally lowered it, a smile twisting her lips. "As long as you don't bring him here, I'll be fine."

"I know… well, you know how I feel like shit for what happened."

"And you know I forgave you last week after you apologized profusely. Go, have fun."

"You sure?"

She whacked me on the leg with the rolled up magazine. "I've already forgiven you and I'm not your mum or anything. I'll see you on Platform 9 ¾."

"Thanks, Tess. I really appreciate it."

Her response was a laugh and some loose Bertie Bott's Every-Flavour Beans pelted at my back. At least I had her back on my side, even if she highly disproved of my newer friend. I gathered my things, said goodbye, and followed Lily out and down the train corridor. I ignored Lily's impish smile as we went down the carriage, not wanting to elaborate on anything related to Sirius. I reckoned that I'd earnt my fair share of teasing, since it was my modus operandi when it came to showing affection with those around me.

"Look who I brought back with me," Lily said in a cheery voice as she drew open the door of a compartment.

Remus, Peter, James and Sirius all looked up at the interruption of a very heated game of Exploding Snap. Peter and James had what looked like ash on their faces from the remnants of an exploded card, though James had taken the time to wipe his glasses clean, while Sirius had a smear of soot on his forehead. Remus seemed to be winning, and consequently was the only clean one of them.

"Welcome back into the fray, Evans," Remus said, a proud gleam in his eyes as he admired his hold over the competition. James scrambled to wipe the debris off his face, but only succeeded in rubbing it over more of his skin.

"Hey, kitten," Sirius said with a cheeky grin. "Come sit next to me, we're almost done." He gestured to the seat beside him, as if I needed the encouragement and as if I was planning to sit anywhere else. Lily sat down next to James so that we were across from each other, while Peter and Remus were next to the window. Though, with their aggressive card game, they were all leaning nearer to one another and there was a sense of the boys having their separate circle, while Lily and I remained content on the edges.

"Alright then, Moony. Your turn," James said.

Sirius pushed his shirt sleeves up to his elbows and leaned forward in eagerness, resting his arms on his legs. I was momentarily distracted by the revelation of his forearms and leaned nearer to look over his shoulder at his hand of cards. "What d'you think?" he whispered, showing me his hand.

"Dunno," I said, meaning it. I had no idea how to play any sort of card game, wizarding or Muggle.

"Are his cards rubbish, Grindylow?" Peter asked casually.

"I wouldn't know, I don't know how to play any card games."

Remus laughed. "Better luck next time, Wormtail."

"Evans, what's Prongs's hand like?" he said.

"What're you getting at, Wormtail? Trying to lead my girlfriend over to the dark side?"

"No, it was just a harmless question. She doesn't have to tell me."

"Moony, I call interference. You can't start asking the spectators for help," Sirius said.

"Kersti, what's Padfoot's hand like?" Remus joked.

"Fuck's sakes," Sirius said in between barks of laughter.

"I joke, but anyway, no asking for aid, Wormtail," Remus added.

Lily and I exchanged a smile as the boys went back to being engrossed in their game. While she drew her legs up onto the seat to sit cross-legged, I stretched mine out and used it as a footrest again, getting comfortable with the novel that I'd brought. We looked over every so often as a card exploded, adding to the ash and debris already on the boys. I tried to laugh along with the others, but the closer we drew to London, the more tense and miserable I became. How could I hope to act normally around my family today? And how would I distract them while I got rid of all evidence of my existence in the house? They couldn't very well walk in on me burning my bed or clothes. I reckoned that I'd have to magically seal my bedroom door until I was done obliviating them. In an attempt to ease my shaky nerves, I pulled all my notes on memory charms and false memory charms out of my satchel and began flipping through them while the boys finished their card game.

"Well, that's that," James said, brushing off his robes and hands. "Lend me a hand getting this ash off me, Lily?"

"At least you did much better this round, Wormtail," Sirius said, shifting beside me so that he was leaning back against the seat.

"Bloody hell, get those off me! Look how much room we've got in here, you sod!" James said to Sirius, who had tried to use his friend's lap as a footrest.

"James, for god's sake, why don't I just use magic to get this ash off you?"

"Because he wants to feel your sweet, loving touch, Evans," Sirius quipped, making us all laugh.

"Stop ruining my charming techniques, Padfoot," James said, whacking him on the leg with a random copy of Witch Weekly that had doodles all over the cover.

"Why d'you need to charm your dear Lily-flower if you're already dating?" I said, cocking an eyebrow.

"Agh, nevermind," James muttered and pushed his glasses up his nose, clean now that Lily had waved her wand over him.

"You've got some ash on your face," I said to Sirius. "Come here so I can wipe it off."

Sirius obliged and let me wipe the soot from his forehead with my thumb. "Thanks, kitten."

Peter cast a longing look at the compartment door and the aisle outside. "Why didn't we ever do that petition to have the trolley witch go 'round on the trips back to King's Cross?"

"I said I'd help you," Remus answered, glancing out the window. "You insisted that you needed Padfoot and Prongs to help."

"Because they would've gotten all the signatures I'd need."

"Too much effort, wasn't worth my time," Sirius drawled.

"I can help you with a petition, Peter," Lily said, smiling kindly at him.

He shook his head and grumbled something under his breath.

"Has anyone got anything good to read? I forgot to bring a book for the train," Remus said.

"Here, read these. I compiled them from all the research I did," I said and handed him my hefty sack of notes.

"Merlin's arsehole, you do homework over the break?" Sirius said.

"Oh, don't look so worried. I don't, I just, er… forgot I left them in my robe pockets."

Sirius laid a hand against his chest dramatically. "Thank Merlin! I was worried that you were revealing your boring side."

I elbowed him playfully. "Tease."

I read my novel while Lily flipped through a supplementary Potions textbook, with the boys falling into one of their ardent quidditch debates, until Lily checked her wristwatch and nudged my feet which were right next to her leg.

"Hmm?" I said, looking up.

"Did you bring Muggle clothes to change into? D'you want to change into them now? We're about an hour away."

I agreed and tossed aside my book, stretching my back and legs in preparation to stand.

"Where're you going, Lily?" James asked, noticing her standing by the compartment door.

"Changing into Muggle clothes."

Sirius smirked at me. "Can I come too?"

I laughed and poked him. "You'll just have to settle for imagining me getting changed in the loo, you dog."

"Worth a try," he said, still grinning and watching me as I left with Lily.

There were some other students milling about in the aisles, some coming back from the lavatories in Muggle clothes, others pressing their faces against the windows to see how far we were from London. I stared out the window too, wishing that I were out there, or anywhere else but here, trapped in this metal cage, rattling through the countryside towards my family, who would know nothing of me in a few short days. Yes, I needed to do this sooner rather than later, and I was glad that they hadn't been found by Death Eaters yet, but naturally I was dreading the task that lay ahead for me. Lily met me back outside the lavatories, wearing a very smart outfit, her green jumper highlighting the colour of her eyes. I looked pretty drab in my trainers, jeans and navy jumper, though I'd opted to keep my black outer robe on to hide my Muggle clothes from prying eyes. My brother would tease me and call me a bat, but it was better than being easily identified as "mudblood scum" by my clothes.

"Wow, Lily…" James stuttered when she entered the compartment ahead of me. "You look bloody fantastic."

She blushed and smiled. "Thank you," she said and sat down next to him again.

Sirius couldn't take his eyes off my legs. The poor bloke wasn't used to seeing all of my legs at once if we weren't naked, since my uniform skirt went to my knees. It didn't help that I'd put on my high-waisted jeans that were slim-fitting all through the leg, not leaving much to the imagination. I plopped back down into the seat beside him, and he finally managed to lift his eyes to my face. His expression was one of pleasant surprise; he clearly hadn't thought that I could get anymore attractive.

I cocked an eyebrow. "What're you looking at, love?"

Sirius grinned and stared right back. "Your legs, love."

"Oi, not in front of us, that's disgusting," James said, ending the sexually-charged moment. Sirius and I laughed good-naturedly, and with a last, longing glance at my jean-clad legs stretched out beside him, he turned back to his friends.

"So we can come then? Like last year?" Peter said to James.

"Yeah, that's the plan, Wormtail. Come 'round to my place on the twenty-eighth?"

"Fuck, I can't believe we have to drag ourselves out to London on the second. I won't even be sober from New Year's by the time we board the Hogwarts Express," Sirius grumbled.

"Just make a hangover potion."

"You think I had the forethought to nick the ingredients? Of course not. Who fucking decided to make the train back on the second?"

"Er, dunno, Padfoot."

"Bet it was Filch so he could whip hungover students wandering the corridors."

"Merlin, how much are you all planning to drink?" Lily said.

"A lot," Sirius replied.

"It's, er, sort of a tradition, Lily. Er, for the past two years," James said, ruffling his hair.

"Oh… well then."

"You don't have to partake or anything."

"Yeah, Evans. No one's forcing you. I mean, you won't have as much fun as us because you'll be sober as a-"

"Shut it, Black. Just have some Butterbeer on hand, will you? Then I'll be fine."

"You can keep Wormtail company, he's a lightweight."

"Thanks for dropping me in the shit, Moony."

Sirius, James and Remus burst out laughing. I hid my face behind my novel, not letting Peter see that I was on the verge of laughing too; he never tolerated anyone laughing at him except his friends.

"Oh, yeah. So bloody funny, huh?" Peter grumbled.

James clapped him on the back. "We only do it because you're our best mate, Wormtail. And all I can think about when someone mentions you're a lightweight is when you got so sloshed in fifth year you started snogging the statue of Boris the Bewildered to get into the Prefects' Bath."

Sirius wheezed, tears gathering in his eyes. "Merlin! And then later," he got out between wheezes, "you forgot to jump the vanishing step and got stuck in the gap up to your chest."

"You did sod-all when that happened, Padfoot. You just stood there laughing while me and Prongs pulled him out," Remus said.

"Why's it my fault I couldn't stop laughing? You should've stopped Wormtail from falling in the first place."

"You spiked my drink with firewhiskey! It was all your fault, Padfoot!" Peter said, pointing an accusing finger.

Sirius held up his hands in a show of surrender. "I may or may not have added several shots' worth of firewhiskey to your drink, but what you do while you're trollied is out of my control."

I started laughing and exchanged a look with Lily. We'd obviously underestimated the sorts of private mischief and tomfoolery that these four hooligans got up to.

"Wormtail, don't feel too bad," Remus comforted him. "Remember when Padfoot had to retch in that broom cupboard on the way up from the Forbidden Forest?"

"Oh, yeah, that's right, Moony. When was that?" James said.

"Last year, if I remember correctly."

Sirius blew a breath out between his lips. "I've no idea what you're talking about. Since when am I a lightweight? I never retch when I drink."

"Uh, what in Merlin's name are you going on about? You holed up in the loo last year during the Halloween party, and I know you weren't shagging some bird in there, because I watched you go in."

Sirius buried his dark-haired head in his hands, conceding defeat and letting his friends have a laugh at his expense, though he was grinning good-naturedly when he raised his head. I smiled, taking a moment to watch him laughing and joking with his friends, before turning back to my novel. After what felt like only minutes, the Hogwarts Express began to slow and then jerked to a stop, the windows looking out onto King's Cross Station. My stomach seized and I took my notes back from Remus with clammy hands, cramming everything back into my satchel. I made sure that my robes were hiding my Muggle clothes as the boys levitated their trunks off the compartment's luggage rack, and all too soon the six of us were getting to our feet and tumbling out into the aisle, and then out the nearest door and onto Platform 9 ¾.

The platform was a buzz of activity, full of witches and wizards in robes, trunks and stacks of books floating through the air behind their owners, young children chasing one another, parents calling and waving to their children. I followed the boys and Lily as they weaved through the crowd until they had found a spot to wait, the crowd parting on either side of us like water around a rock.

James was using his superior height to crane his neck over the crowd. "I don't see any sign of them. They're probably running late."

"As usual," Sirius added and the boys laughed.

"When're your parents getting here, Lily?" James asked.

"Soon, I think. They said that they'd stick around until yours come so that they can have a proper meet and greet," she said, also scanning the crowd for her family.

Sirius shoved his hands in his pockets beside me and grinned. "You nervous, mate?"

"Piss off," James said and laughed before he went back to searching for the Evans and Potter families.

"Where's your leather jacket, Padfoot?" Peter asked.

"Don't get your knickers in a knot, it's in my trunk. I'll put it on later."

I turned to Sirius. "You have a leather jacket? Like a Muggle one?"

He grinned. "Yeah, a black one. Does that surprise you?"

I shook my head. "Surprisingly, no. Seems like a you kind of thing."

"I'll take that as a compliment, kitten."

"Good, I meant it as a compliment."

"Aww, kitten."

"Oi, you two. No snogging in front of us," James said and whacked Sirius on the back.

"Right back at you with Evans, Prongs," Sirius said and whacked James back.

"Hey, Padfoot, look. It's Regulus," Peter burst out.

Remus gave him a sharp look and a quick disapproving shake of his head. I turned to where Peter had been looking and saw a boy with the same dark hair as Sirius, but who wasn't nearly as tall or handsome. He was accompanied by a witch and a wizard who were clearly his parents. The resemblance was striking, and I realized that this must be Sirius's parents and brother; that much was obvious from the dark hair, pale complexions and haughty good-looks that they all had. However, Sirius's brother Regulus I noted was slimmer and smaller than his older brother, and neither did he have his lips or nose, even if he did have the same cheekbones. I watched as Regulus embraced his parents, his trunk sitting neatly beside him. I could see the immaculate condition that his Slytherin robes were in, along with the glittering of the Prefects' badge on the front as it caught the midday light. He made a very tidy figure, and it seemed as though no hair was out of place, so different from the sloppy-chic way that Sirius always wore his own uniform.

I turned my focus to Sirius's parents next. I could see Sirius's resemblance to his father immediately, and same with his mother, and they even looked eerily similar to each other, with the same shade of hair and aristocratic features. Both of his parents were dressed in rich, opulent robes which revealed their elevated socio-economic status, along with the beautiful jewelry that his mother wore. She must've had rings on every one of her fingers, the precious stones and intricate metal work catching the light as her hands moved while she spoke to her husband. However, she did look to be in much better health than Sirius's father, who had a greyish pallor to his skin and whose hair bore a significant amount of silver strands amongst the black. As he clasped his son on the shoulder affectionately, a large, chunky gold signet ring caught my eye. With my tiger vision, I noticed that it had what looked like a family crest on it, and I assumed that it was that of the Blacks.

After Regulus had spoken with his parents, he turned his attention immediately to a book that he'd been carrying at his side. While his parents- his mother especially- turned to their neighbours closest to them and began socializing, Regulus stayed where he was, head bent over his book and dark hair falling forward. The three of them were positioned perfectly at the centre of a collection of other Slytherin families, who were no doubt all purebloods as well. The other families revolved around the three Blacks, various members coming to converse with Sirius's parents. I watched as Avery, a younger brother and sister I hadn't known that he'd had, and his parents approached them, and then fell into a vibrant and amicable conversation with the Blacks. The Averys and the Blacks greeted each other like old friends, and I remembered what Avery had said about there being pureblood gatherings. Despite all the pureblood families that came to socialize with his parents, Regulus remained focused on his book, only looking up to provide a nod or brief word in greeting. And though all of these families approached the Blacks, Sirius's parents still seemed to maintain an air of superiority. It was clear that they lived and breathed their status as one of the oldest, richest and most noble pureblood families in Britain.

James spoke, drawing my gaze back to the boys. "Merlin, poor Regulus. Have to feel bad for him, since he's such a loser compared to our Padfoot." He clapped Sirius on the back, sensing the sour mood that had washed over his friend because of Peter's tactless comment.

Sirius wasn't looking at his family, instead staring off into the distance, his eyebrows drawn low and his mouth set in a hard line. I had only seen him this tense once before- when Avery had been taunting him about his family- and I couldn't help but look at him curiously, waiting for his reaction. He noticed me studying him and his expression shifted minimally as he tried to flash me a smile; it came out as more of a pained grimace. "That's my dear brother, kitten. And my dear old parents." He looked at me, daring me to do something with the hard look in his eyes, though what that was, I couldn't be sure.

"Any normal, decent person would hate them too for what they believe in, Sirius," I said quietly, meeting his eyes and refusing to back down. He was trying to lash out again in his hurt and anger.

His features softened but he didn't say anything. James looked from me to Sirius quickly, perhaps trying to figure out how much I'd found out about his best friend's shitty family.

"It's fine, Prongs," Sirius said, still staring at me. He said this to placate James, who'd been looking at me with increasing hostility, as if he needed to jump in and defend Sirius from me.

"Alright, Padfoot," he said and Remus exhaled a long breath which he must've been holding from the tension. Peter was looking from me to Sirius with bugged-out eyes, clearly shocked that his friend had chosen to become close to anyone other than the three of them. I saw Lily steal a glance over at the Blacks before resuming her search for her family in the crowd, out of politeness for Sirius's privacy.

"Kersti, are your parents picking you up here?" Lily asked me.

My stomach jolted painfully. "Shit," I said.

"What?" she said.

"Shit, I forgot to tell them not to come to Platform 9 ¾."

"What?" James said.

"I came here by myself in September. It's not that I'm embarrassed of them, I'm afraid for them, being Muggles and all in the midst of a bunch of blood purist Slytherins. And I wanted to keep my blood status a secret." I scanned the crowd frantically, looking for my mom or brother's blond head. "Shit, shit, shit. Oh, cock and balls!"

"It'll be fine, kitten," Sirius said.

"Before you go," Lily said, "what's your address, Kersti?"

"Er…" I craned my neck, my focus now on locating my family in the sea of witches and wizards. "723 Kingswood Road, Reading," I answered automatically, still frantically scanning the crowd.

"That way when we invite everyone over on the twenty-eighth, Padfoot'll be so-"

"Lay off it, will you?" Sirius cut in and threw James a punch on the arm.

I saw my mum's head of blonde hair in the crowd moments before she noticed me. When she did, she and my dad waved and smiled. My heart raced. God, I was such a fucking idiot for forgetting to tell them to stay on the Muggle platform. The three of them were standing there, exposed and already attracting sneers and stares from the purebloods around them.

"Min lilla Kersti Långstrump!" Mum called out to me and waved, beaming and blissfully unaware of how much danger she was in. Not that anyone would dare to attack them this openly, but later, if someone followed us… I waved back and forced a smile.

"Are those your parents and brother, kitten?" Sirius asked beside me.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and blinked back tears. This was the end of my family's life as they knew it. "Yeah. I've got to go. Er…" I took a few steps forward, then turned back to face them, but I could only stare at Sirius. "I'll see you soon," I said and turned on my heel, making my way as quickly to them as possible.

My parents, Astrid Nilsson and John Ridgelow, gripped me in a fierce hug when I had reached them. "Hi, Mum, Dad." I saw Magnus lurking next to them, staring around at the witches and wizards in incredulity.

"Hi, sweetheart," John said.

"How was school, Kersti Långstrump?" Astrid asked.

"It was fine, Mum."

"Mum and Dad said I can have both our rooms," Magnus cut in.

I rolled my eyes and stepped back from my parents so that we weren't having a group hug in the middle of the crowded platform. "Yeah, right."

"Magnus, she just got back. You don't need to start with that," John said.

"And they gave me your car."

"Magnus!"

"You wish! You can't even drive, squirt," I retorted.

"I will soon," Magnus shot back, making a rude face at me.

"Children, no bickering," Astrid said. For now at least, Magnus and I ceased our childish feud, though it was sure to start up again in the hour-long car ride back to Reading. My parents were looking around curiously after having greeted me, as they always did when confronted with wizard folk. To any Muggle, of course the scene on the train platform would be bizarre, with all the wizards in their flowing robes and hats, trolleys following wizards of their own accord, trunks being made to whizz through the air.

"Where are Emily, Theresa and Amelia? You didn't have a falling out with them, did you?" Mum asked.

I shook my head.

"Are those your friends too?" John asked, nodding in the direction of the Marauders and Lily, who were still waiting for the Potter and Evans families to show up. I faced their way. Lily waved at me, smiling, and I waved back. Sirius grinned at me and blew me a kiss, which I returned with equal vigour before turning back to my parents.

"Who's the tall one with the long hair staring at you, Kersti? The one who just blew you a kiss?" Astrid asked.

"That's a bloke?" Magnus said. "Oh, I thought that was a woman."

I started laughing.

"Yes, well, if it weren't for his face, maybe he'd verge on looking like a woman," John added.

I kept on laughing, thinking about what Sirius would do if he heard someone saying that he looked like a woman. "Oh, that's Sirius," I said when I had managed to control my laughter.

"What?" Astrid said.

"You mean, like, serious?" Magnus added.

"No, like the star."

"So, it's Sirius and not Serious?"

"Yes."

Magnus stared at Sirius with a look of pure confusion on his face. "Why would you name your kid after a star?"

I shrugged. "Wizards and witches tend to name their kids more . . . bizarre things."

"Poor chap. Hope he doesn't get bullied at school for having a name like that," John said.

I laughed again. "Oh, no, don't spare him too much sympathy. If anything, he's actually doing most of the bullying," I said, thinking about how James and Sirius loved to torment Snape.

My parents frowned at me. "He's not bullying you, is he? If he is, I'll go talk to him, wizard or not," Dad said, this time staring Sirius down like a bull ready to charge.

"No, no, he never bullies me. He's my friend," I said quickly.

"Oh, thank God. But he's a very good-looking friend, Kersti," Astrid said, giving me a knowing look.

My dad was still looking at Sirius. "He's also not ogling you like a friend would."

I laughed. "Can we go now, please? I'm starving." I wasn't actually hungry, but I wanted to get out of view of any Slytherins and blood purists (namely Avery), and I felt bad that Sirius was getting stared down by my family. They meant well, but like so many parents, they could get a tad overprotective.

"Why don't you go introduce us to your new friends, sweetheart?" John said, smiling at me. "They're new, aren't they?"

"Yes, but I don't really think that's necessary."

"Why not, Kersti?" Astrid said, smiling at the Marauders and Lily across the way. "I'd like to meet some more of your school friends. It's so hard, not really knowing all the details with your school, and at least this way we can have a good idea of your friends."

Magnus smirked at me. "Yeah, I want to ask that woman-looking bloke why he can't afford a good pair of scissors to cut his hair."

"Yeah? Well, I've got a long, pointy object in my pocket, fancy that in your eye?" I shot back. "Mum, Dad, please. Can we go?" I said, trying to minimize my uncomfortable squirming.

Astrid saw the look on my face and smiled gently. "Alright, if you want, Kersti Långstrump."

"No harm done, sweetheart," my dad said. "Magnus, stop staring at that poor chap, even if he does have longer hair. We don't know what sort of hairstyles are in vogue in the Wizarding World."

"Why does it matter if he's a 'wizard' or not? He looks like a woman with that-"

"Magnus, nej. Don't insult Kersti's friends," Astrid said.

I paused and turned back to the boys and Lily. Remus was with a man and a woman who looked to be his parents, while James and Lily were discussing something. Sirius was still watching me, as I knew that he had been doing the whole time. He grinned at me, his hands in his pockets. I smiled back and waved in a parting greeting, and with a last lingering look at him, I turned away and followed my family through the crowd and back onto the Muggle side of the platform.

"Now, Kersti, you aren't dating this Sirius boy? Because your father and I thought you were still seeing Matthew? We just sent you one of his pink packages in November, so we thought-"

I shook my head. "No, I'm not dating Sirius." I grinned and added, "Mamma, han är en gubbe."

Astrid did a double take and looked at me. "En gubbe?"

"What are you two calling this boy now?" John said as we left the station and went in search of our car.

"En gubbe. An old man, Dad."

"Kersti, he's your age. Why in heaven's name are you calling him that?"

I grinned at the mere thought of Sirius. "He's born in November of 1959, so I call him 'old man' sometimes."

He gave me a stern look over his shoulder. "Kersti, that's not very nice of you. That's only two months shy of 1960."

"Kersti fancies the Starboy," Magnus said in a sing-song voice.

I turned and made a face at him.

"Does this poor chap mind if you call him that?" John added as he unlocked our Volvo.

"We're friends, Dad. Most of our conversations are based on us teasing each other incessantly."

My mother smiled at me knowingly before she got into the passenger seat. "Tell us if you and this gubbe ever decide to date each other. I'm sure we'd like to have a proper meeting with him."

"Nej, Mamma. It's not that kind of friendship." Although, I was leaving out the parts of our interactions that were based on us shagging each other.

"Well, I'm glad that you've been making friends, honey."

"Kersti's making friends with women-looking blokes."

"Stop it, Magnus!" I said. "He does not look like a woman."

"Dunno, that hair looked awfully feminine to me."

"Did you even bother to look at his face, you ninny?"

"Magnus, Kersti, stop the bickering," Astrid said over her shoulder as we did up our seatbelts. As my father shifted gears and pulled out of the spot, I looked out the window and felt the dread welling up inside me. This Christmas break would change me and the course of my life forever, and there was nothing I could do except execute the plan that I'd already formulated, even if I could never forgive myself for what I would soon do.

AN: please note that Regulus will not be making more than a very minor appearance in the story.