A/N:

Another chapter up.

Please enjoy.

It was four o'clock in the morning when Rose gave up any pretenses of going to sleep. Her bags were packed neatly (for the fifth time) at the foot of her bed, and her lamp probably felt like a yo-yo with how many times Rose had switched it on and off to avoid anyone knowing she was awake. She had even pretended to be asleep when she knew that it was Sirius who had come to check on her. It was an awful thing to do to him, but she just couldn't face him and the mess of emotions that would bring up.

The grandfather clock downstairs (ironically a bequest from Rose's late grandfather - the one who'd given her The Portrait of Dorian Gray) chimed the hour in, each deep bong resonating inside of her. That grandfather had died when she was just eleven, now her father would likely follow less than seven years after his own.

It wasn't fair!

Rose threw herself on to the bed, muffling a scream into the pillows. She was a witch, one of the most gifted witches in her generation (she'd have to be to already be an unregistered animagus), but there was nothing she could do - nothing modern medicine nor anyone with a degree in the field could do to save her father from whatever it was that was slowly killing him. He had been dying for weeks, had probably known since before they returned for her other grandfather's funeral, and yet she hadn't noticed. Her, a Marauder, trained to observe and notice things, to spy and to know things that the professors and students didn't yet want them to know. And yet she hadn't noticed! Of course, now that she thought of it, it explained everything. The way Jim had veered between shadowing and ignoring them, the way Jim had acted at the wedding - having his heart to hearts with them. The way he'd spent as much time as he possibly could with all of them - James and Sirius included as his honorary sons. Rose felt stupid for not connecting it earlier. It was just so heartbreakingly obvious in hindsight.

With the chimes of the grandfather clock still, the house stood chillingly silent. Peter's snores would have been a comfort in the void of sound that currently surrounded her. But there was nothing. Part of her, quite a sizable part in fact, wanted to cross the room and drown the silence in the first Bowie record she came across, but she never wanted to hear that music and immediately correlate it with this shattering emptiness. And, well, if Bowie was out of the question, there was only one thing Rose needed right now. She slipped out of her bedroom and padded down the hall in her usual night attire, hauling a robe on for propriety's sake. A brief urge had her cracking open the door to her sister's room, her twin passed out on the bed as if she had fallen asleep crying. Rose gently covered her with her duvet, and slipped back out into the no longer so quiet hallway. The faintest murmur reached her ears, an almost familiar hum drifting from down the corridor. Jim had put James, Remus and Sirius into the guest bedroom, giving them free rein to do whatever they found necessary just as long as nothing got blown up. It was from this room that the chatter was definitely coming. Rose opened the door, three miscreants immediately jumping away guiltily. If this was any other day and Rose had caught them up this late, she would have smirked, put her hands on her hips, and demanded if they had any idea what bloody time it was. But this wasn't any other day, it was this day, and Rose couldn't summon up even an ounce of will to act normally. Her friends would forgive her, of course, there was nothing normal about this situation at all.

Remus sat on James's bed with his legs crossed, green eyes sad and closed off. A dogeared copy of Hound of the Baskervilles (the Moony equivalent of a comfort blanket) rested open in his lap, although he paid as much attention to it as the Marauders usually did to whatever moron was teaching them Defense that year. James was facing her, propped up against his headboard, the set of his jaw saying he'd just been in the middle of a furious whispered discussion with Remus prior to Rose interrupting them. Nevertheless, he seemed pleased to see her, his hazel eyes offering a sad sort of greeting that his mouth refused to form - they all hated empty platitudes, and anything James could say, although supportive and kind, would definitely be so. Sirius had been seated when Rose first opened the door, but now he was standing in front of her, a sorrow she recognised bitterly as kin to her own burning in his eyes. He didn't say anything, but he didn't need to. The barely concealed devastation in his eyes said it all. Ironically, it was James who broke the silence that descended upon them. "Can't sleep either, Astra?"

"Can't sleep, can't cry any more" Rose breathed, almost horrified at how raspy her voice sounded. "It was just so quiet. Why is it so quiet?"

"Because nobody's sleeping, and we're all pretending we are" Sirius replied, not an ounce of judgement in his voice. Rose flicked a brief glance at him, the raw intensity of the emotion in his face almost too much to look at. She hoped it was enough to convey an apology she couldn't voice and only partially meant, and by the way Sirius moved aside to let her in properly, she knew he had both understood and accepted it for what it was.

Remus closed his book and tossed it over to his bed without so much as a second glance. "I'm glad you came to find us, Rosie" he said, seeming to send a significant glance at James and Sirius - probably telling them to behave. "Did you want the company or just the lack of silence? Because we can be both."

Rose honestly wished she had an answer that would make them all feel better and useful, but they all knew the real reason why Rose had trudged down the corridor at four o'clock in the buttcrack of the morning. "I need Siri."

Sirius didn't even hesitate. He crossed the few steps to her, taking her hands in his because somehow he just knew that anything else would be too overwhelming for Rose right now. "I'm here" Sirius breathed, his own pain and share in this hellish situation shoved aside. "I'm right here. I'll always be here."

"It's not fair" she breathed, no longer caring if she sounded petulant or just devastated.

"No, it isn't" Sirius agreed, a bitterness thick in his voice that reminded her of the way her father had laughed. "Jim doesn't deserve this. Your family never deserved this." He took a long, deep breath in, forcing himself calm. "It's the most bloody awful thing that has ever happened, and it shouldn't be happening. But, oh my Rosebud," his eyes lost all their bitterness, overflowing with an intense emotion she knew and felt so keenly. "We're here. We're all here for you, and for Lily. We all love Jim, and there isn't going to be a single second when you're all alone in this - even if you're sick of the sight of us and just want to be alone. We will never leave you, Rosebud."

Rose stared at him, silent tears falling down her cheeks. It turned out she could still cry, all it took was Sirius' heartfelt words, silently corroborated by the nods from James and Remus, to tear down whatever internal defense she had erected, and make her feel again. Sirius looked a little blurry, handsome and sincere, but a little blurry - thanks to the haze of tears in her eyes - silently waiting for her to respond. She forced a single, shaky breath into her choked lungs, releasing it in another sob. "Promise?" With them, she never needed to hate how vulnerable she sounded, trusting them implicitly even at her very lowest.

"Oh, Merlin" James breathed softly. "Always, Rosie."

"Of course" Remus added, swearing it as if it was a task as easy for him as breathing. And they were both sweet and it was what she needed to hear, but she needed to hear it from Sirius Black more.

He pulled both her palms up to his lips, kissing both of them. "My Rosebud" he sighed, not disappointed, never that, but so very sad. "I solemnly swear I will never ever leave you" he promised, the intensity in his eyes comforting by it's familiarity. "Even of they threw me in Azkaban to keep me from you, it wouldn't work. I'd escape the second they put me in." Letting her hands go, he cupped her face, gently insisting on eye contact. "You will never be alone, Rosebud. Not while I am alive." It never occurred to Rose to doubt him, the very idea of Azkaban keeping him was laughable. She knew, as certainly as her friends had sworn it, that they would have to die before they would ever willingly see her alone. And that simple reassurance - now when everything she had held to as her life's certainties were shattering - meant everything in ways she couldn't describe. She let Sirius finally pull her into his arms, but reached a stubborn hand out for James and Remus too, not settling until she felt her friends - all the friends that she had here (because there wasn't a doubt in her mind that Peter would be here if he could doing exactly the same thing) - lay down around them. Then, safe at last, they fell asleep.

At eight o'clock in the morning, when Violet pushed open the door, wondering what was keeping them all, she was greeted with a sight she would never forget. Alice, Marlene and Lily were curled together, all sound asleep on what was supposed to have been James Potter's bed, Lily's face smushed into his pillow (which would mysteriously disappear into a certain wizard's trunk before they left), hair fanned out to tangle as it pleased. On Sirius' bed, the Marauders were all piled together, a single blanket (Lily's own contribution to the party) tangled in James' legs, while Remus clung on near the edge of the bed, hogging the duvet to himself. When she saw the dried tear tracks on her youngest daughter's face, Rose sleeping soundly against Sirius' chest, Violet didn't have the heart to wake them. She merely set down an old alarm clock, letting that do her job so her children (and her honorary children) could wake up undiscovered and undisturbed by her.

Rose awoke to familiarity itself. Sirius' arms were gently unwrapping from around her, James was swearing at an alarm clock which then went sailing over their heads (not a morning person, James), Remus was already chiding him for not respecting private property (to which James naturally told him to go stuff himself), and Marlene was playfully bemoaning the lack of the Banshees on the wireless. Rose's mind fixed on the last point and froze. With the sound of Marlene and then Lily's voice, the memory of the day before slammed into her. Her breath caught in her throat, for just a second, but no tears sprang to her eyes. She believed what Sirius had said, there was a comfort in never being alone, in not having to go through this alone, that both grounded her and gave her the courage to keep on going. She was under absolutely no delusions that this was going to be easy, but nothing the Marauders set their minds to could ever truly be called easy. Rose ignored the typical background bickering of James and Remus, Sirius dryly commenting as he felt it necessary, and frowned over at what she had thought was supposed to be James's bed. Lily perched at the edge of the bed, her usually bright eyes dazed and unfocused, fingers braiding her hair. Alice caught her gaze and shrugged, bobbed hair bouncing as she shook her head. Rose inclined her head in reply, knowing what Alice was trying to say. Of course Lily wasn't herself, none of them were. Nonetheless, she hated seeing Lily like this - she supposed it was actually a blessing that James wasn't seeing her like this, he'd do something obnoxious just to try and get Lily back to her normal yelling self. Rose wriggled off the bed, adjusting her night attire where it got rucked up, and caught Lily by the arm. Her twin frowned at her, mouth opening no doubt to tell her she had to go and get ready. As if Rose didn't remember that they were going back to Hogwarts today. But there was something she had to do first. She hugged Lily as tightly as she could, trying to silently promise the same thing her Marauders had promised last night. While she lived, she would never abandon her sister - she hoped Lily knew that. For a moment, they held on as tight as they could, both stepping back in unison. Lily managed a faint smile, nodding once as she floated out of the room. Rose turned to James and Remus, feeling the faintest flicker of genuine amusement at their antics.

"For Godric's sake, Jamie" she chided, winking at Remus - the werewolf instantly glad at having his partner in crime back on his side. "You threw an alarm clock out the window? What are you, five?"

"Oi!" James protested, spinning to face her. "Which of us starts almost every morning at Hogwarts by tossing a Banshees record out of the window?"

"My eardrums are very sensitive, Prongs" Rose replied sweetly, beginning to follow after Lily. "When I hear awful music, I react." She paused by the door, trying her old Marauder smirk out for size. "A clock on the other hand, just keeps you punctual. Unless you'd rather McGonagall follow through on her threat to transfigure you into a pocket watch?" The loud sound Rose heard before closing her door was James's offended squawk followed by Sirius' bark-like laugh. Nothing was right in her world, but that made it a little bit more bearable.

Jim stood by the front door, a smile warming his face as he watched the Knight Bus appear from seemingly nowhere. Rose stopped at the bottom of the stairs, glad her father was smiling after the tense silence that had been the majority of the morning. He'd always loved anything that came from the wizarding world, getting his hands on anything he could; the Knight Bus would be the metaphorical candy shop for him. James and Sirius hauled the luggage out, stopping to chat with Jim and the conductor of the Knight Bus (some bloke called Eric, which Rose found vaguely amusing considering the driver's name was Ernie), laughter ringing in from the group. A noise from the living room had Rose slipping in there. Marlene and Alice had already boarded the bus, giving the rest of them their time with Jim and Violet before they had to leave. Remus was collecting the last of his books from Jim's den, leaving just Lily in the room with their mother. Lily worried her hands together, glancing from their mother to the open door and the Knight Bus just outside of it. "Maybe I should stay, help with Dad" Lily offered, not sounding nearly convinced enough.

"Go back to school" Violet chided, brushing a rogue strand of Lily's hair behind her ear. "Your father won't get any better with you there watching him all the time. He barely tolerates me doing so." Lily moved to protest, Violet gently shaking her head. "He wants to be himself while he still can. I promised to let him do what he has to. That includes all you girls too."

"Mum" Lily protested, Violet fixing her with a no nonsense glare Rose recognised from bitter experience.

"It's what your father wants, Lily Marie" she repeated, leaving no room for argument.

"I know that, Mum" Lily sighed, that fragile light back in her eyes. Rose hated that light, it spoke of the tears she was holding back, the helplessness she felt. "Why can't he want us to stay?"

"And give up your entire lives? Your schooling? All your plans?" Violet shook her head, kissing her daughter's temple. "No, baby, he doesn't want that at all. And you shouldn't either, not for his sake."

The Knight Bus's horn sounded, echoing through the Evans house. "We've got to go!" James called, Remus hauling his bags out to the bus, burdened with the many books he'd felt it necessary to buy during their slightly longer than normal holiday. There wasn't even a small part of Rose that was happy to be leaving Jim behind to face this with just her mother for help (not that Rose doubted their mother could and would do everything in her power to help their father in any and every way he needed), but there was another large part of her that needed to be back at Hogwarts, back where she knew the rules of the game, knew what she had to do to have a fighting chance at winning. She let Jim pull in into his arms as she passed, grabbing fistfuls of his cardigan, as if the real presence of it in her hands would be enough to keep him real and present in the world forever. For that single brief moment, she allowed herself to be young again, and certain in the conviction that her father was invincible.

"We'll be back in a few months for summer, briefly" Rose offered, trying to keep this as if everything was completely normal.

"Try to not cause too much unnecessary trouble" Jim replied, his customary parting comment.

"You know I can't promise anything of the sort" Rose grinned, injecting the expression with as much mischief as she could.

"And you know I can't let you leave without at least saying it" Jim smirked, running his eyes over her. "I love you, little star."

"I love you too, Daddy" she murmured, kissing his cheek even as she turned and fled onto the relative safety and magical normalcy of the Knight Bus. Another honk of the horn and Lily, James and Sirius jumped into the deep purple death trap (a named unaffectionately coined by Benjy after their return from the Christmas holidays), the shrunken head already beginning to heckle poor Ernie.

Rose took a deep breath as she took her seat between Remus and Sirius, her eyes fixed on the figure of her father standing outside their house. This would not be the last time she saw him, she knew that on some deep and intangible level, but part of her mind (that tiny voice she hated for it's negativity) couldn't help but murmur that this might be the last sight she ever had of her father, whole and outwardly healthy, that she would ever have again in the flesh. Sirius reached the few inches across and took her hand, squeezing it gently to draw her out of the negative thoughts beginning to plague her. "Don't worry" he murmured, keeping his voice low enough that it wouldn't carry to the other (varied and often slightly odd) passengers of the wizarding conveyance. "Jim's a tough old bloke. He's no less a fighter than you or I. He'll beat this, whatever the Salazar it is, and be better before you know it." Sirius' words were full of empty platitudes, but when he voiced them, they sounded full and promising instead of the empty comfort they would have been from anyone's else's lips.

"I hope so" Rose breathed, leaning into his side. "1977 was supposed to be our year. It can't be the year when everything changes for the better, if the worst happens in it."

"The worst won't happen, Rosebud" Sirius promised, this time not caring who heard him. "We won't let it." Rose smiled shakily, nodding her gratitude. She had promised her father that she wouldn't wallow nor dwell for too long on his condition, not when he knew - though he had refused to say how - that they had pressing concerns to dwell on at Hogwarts. The Slytherin's were going to be up to something shifty, she knew that - frankly it was like saying the Marauders were going to prank people at Halloween: obvious - but exactly what they were up to and how that would affect Hogwarts and possibly the entire wizarding world at a future point, well that remained to be seen. As the self-appointed guardians of the status quo at Hogwarts, the Marauders needed to be on their game, needed to be right there in the thick of it, making the decisions that needed to be made, the split-second calls and impulsive actions to fight or hold back. They couldn't do that, not with any degree of safety nor certainty, if they were focused on the problems that even muggle medicine couldn't solve. Rose loved her father with all of her heart, of course she did, but perhaps this was a valuable lesson in the reckoning. When war came (and they were officially allowed to fight out in the world away from the safety and protection of Hogwarts) they would have to learn to put their emotional needs aside, their personal problems aside, to face down the threats of the moment. It was easier said than done, and Rose knew she'd fail miserably and fall down the rabbit hole of all of this, but for now it was exactly the distraction she needed. The Marauders were experts in tunnel vision, in focusing all their attention on a single problem - whether that be what Remus was hiding from them (his lycanthropy), finding a way to spend time with him during the full moons (becoming animagi), teaching themselves to fight, or spying on the Slytherin students. Rose couldn't do it alone. Alone she was just Rose Evans, the girl whose father was dying. But she wasn't alone. She was a Marauder, and Marauders did everything together. They were pack, they were family. There was nothing they couldn't do if they did it together. Rose truly believed that the same would be true now, it didn't just have to be - it simply couldn't be any other way at all.

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