"AND SO I SAY UNTO THEE! WHO WISH TO ENTER PARADISE AND NOT BE BURNED BY THE FIRES OF DAMNATION! IF YOU WANT TO SAVE YOUR IMMORTAL SOULS, YOU WILL LISTEN TO MY WORDS AND FOLLOW ME! ACCEPT ME AS YOUR SHEPHERD, AND I PROMISE I WILL DELIVER YOU TO THE HOLY LAND!"
Such an emotional, powerful, and inspiring statement typically, if not exclusively, comes from those preaching the gospel of holy faith. Men or women who feel as though they've found their spiritual destiny, a calling that all mortal souls hear eventually that shall guide them through life. But this is not such a time; the lips these words left didn't belong to any holy person, any servant of a god, or other such deities. They belong to a man who viewed himself as the only almighty power of this world.
"AMEN!" A congregation full of bright beaming faces cried out, unaware that their minds and bodies were slowly being pulled at like a puppet on strings.
"VERY GOOD! IT IS SO WONDERFUL TO SEE ALL OF YOU EAGER TO SERVE THE ALMIGHTY AND EARN YOUR PLACE ABOVE!" The man preached while holding a hand to the sky, "But now we must part ways. Thought a sad time to be sure it is what we need to spread our gospel to the poor, uncertain souls out there who are waiting to be taken by the clutches of Satan!" He exclaimed, now speaking in a far softer volume, "So go forth, my children! Seek out these unsuspecting sinners and bring them into our flock! Where I may save them from damnation as I have with you, and then we may all go together hand in hand to paradise." He instructed.
In a manner no different from bargain hunters on the last usable day of coupons, the congregation members all ran out immediately. Even the much smaller children vacated the building at break-neck speeds, leaving the only person present, the preacher who watched them leave with a smile. But as the two doors that led into the building slowly stopped rocking back and forth on the hinges, and he was sure no other ears were remained beyond his own, his smile slowly grew to reveal two rows of sharpened fangs.
"This religion shit is WAY too fucking easy." He said with a chortle as he threw his head back, "If I'd known it was this simple to get a bunch of empty-headed dipshits to do what you wanted, I would've been a preacher all my life instead." He admitted.
"VALENTINO." A voice as loud as thunder spoke to him, though only he could hear it, "I have been patient with you thus far. Believing that what plan you were concocting was worth the time spent towards it. Yet all I am seeing is you using the power granted by the Hell you hail from and what I have given you to make yourself a god among man. So tell me now, what is the point of this ridiculous display?" It asked.
Expecting his response to be laced with ego and a sense of superiority, the voice's owner was surprised to see him take on a serious demeanor.
"Know what? You're right. I've been keeping you in the dark way too much on this. You want to know what the point of all this is? You've got it." He promised.
"Hmph, I'll admit, I was not expecting that from you." It replied.
"What can I say? Religion changes a person." He joked before getting back on topic, "Here's the thing, even with those assholes not knowing shit about where we are or what we're up to, we're still severely fucking outnumbered, and until we figure out a way to get in contact with the others, we're flying solo." He began as he held up his right hand to start counting with his fingers, "Which means, we've got no money, we've got no resources, we barely got anything to wipe the shit from our asses. So unless you're hiding another army somewhere that I don't know about, we gotta do a little recruiting." He explained.
"None of these mortals, even if enhanced by my power, will stand a chance against the Slayer or Sentinels." It told him.
"Obviously, which is why they're just fodder. They DO play an important part later, but I can't get into the details now." He countered before continuing, "As I was saying, the whole reason I'm spreading the good word of god or whatever crap makes them fall in love with me ensures that we have a steadily growing workforce that'll break their back trying to suck their dicks if I tell them to. This means that we can get in touch with your people a lot sooner and get things going at a much faster rate." He said.
"And the best way to do this is by creating a religion?" It questioned.
"Oh, one hundred percent. Do you KNOW how many people have managed to buy entire countries because of those bullshit call now and donate programs? They go on about how the lord's going to fix their disabled kid's head, so he doesn't speak in slurs, and this gets them millions of dollars and an army of gullible retards who think they're prophets or gurus or something." He explained as another grin appeared on his face, "But I'm working with true divinity, a few more sermons, and soon we'll get on the radio, then on TV, and then maybe even a movie deal. By that point, either everyone in the world will think I'm greater than Jesus, or I'll have our fanatics beat the shit out of them, a true win-win situation." He said.
Meanwhile, In Lucifer's Circle...
"Oh my gosh, that's horrible!" Charlie exclaimed with a gasp, going so far as to put a hand over her mouth out of surprise.
After being led to the kitchen and put alongside the others, Charlie and Co were given some shocking news about their favorite trigger-happy murderer.
"Yeah, that was pretty much our reaction too." He admitted with crossed arms.
"Not meaning to sound like an ass here, but Cherri's SURE about what she heard and what she saw, right? Because this is WILL we're talking about, the guy who straight up punched the incarnation of evil itself until it cried, uncle." Vagatha pointed out.
"No, she did. Even if we didn't believe what she was saying, it was the look on her face as she said it. Cherri's tough as nails, and yet it got to her like REALLY got to her." He replied, repeating that last part to stress how much it upset her.
"What do you think the dream was about?" Alastor asked as his mind already had several ideas, "From it sounds like something happened to us, maybe he was worried that we'd get killed by the demons?" He suggested.
"There's no way to know for sure, but what we can be sure of is that he's dealing with some shit right now, even more than he already was when we first met him, so it's best if we just keep our noses out of it." Angel Dust said.
"What?! That's the worst thing we could do!" Nifty exclaimed angrily while balling her hands into fists, "Will's our friend! He's spent the last six months fighting all by himself to keep us safe! We can't just ignore his issues! We have to help him!" She insisted.
"HOW?!" He questioned with widened eyes, "How could ANY of us understand what's going on in his head? Have any of YOU spent your entire lives fighting monsters? Did you get to see all of your loved ones murdered and your pet rabbit decapitated? Because unless you've been hiding some fucked up double life, there's no way we can talk to him or do anything for him that will work." He argued.
"We could-"
"No." He said, instantly cutting Charlie off.
"You didn't even hear my idea!" She exclaimed.
"Did it involve singing, hugging, comforting, crying, or even platonic cuddling?" He asked.
"...No..." She answered quietly while looking off to the side.
"Angel, we have to do something," Vagatha said, taking her girlfriend and Nifty's side.
"Okay, so that's three dumb broads not listening to a word I'm saying." He replied, which only pissed her off, "What about you, Al?" He asked.
"If I wanted to be killed by something big and strong, I'd go poke a bear in its eye instead of angering an unstoppable god killer. I'm respecting his privacy." He answered.
"Huh, the creepy as fuck cannibal who talks through a filter has more sense than you three, go figure." Angel Dust said.
"Filter?" He questioned, not sure if he understood what that meant.
"What about you, Queenie?" Angel Dust asked, now turning to Lilith.
"While I do share the want to help Will with his problems, I do agree that unless he asks for it or allows it to happen, we need to mind our business." She answered.
"Alright, the Is have it, you three need to keep yer yaps shut." He told them.
"Mom?!" Charlie questioned, shocked that she'd take such a stance.
"I'm sorry, dear, but Angel makes a valid point. None of us, no matter what personal experiences we have to draw from, can even begin to empathize what Will is working through." She said.
"That doesn't mean we can't console him and help him feel safe by surrounding him with people who care!" Charlie argued.
"...Do you just shove pharmacy greeting cards into your brain or something?" Even after so much time around her, Angel Dust questioned, still amazed by how ridiculously wholesome she was.
"Why the hell did you even tell us about this Angel if you were just going to be a bastard?" Vagatha asked, getting more and more upset by his responses.
"Because I knew you'd get pissed at me if we kept it from you!" He answered.
"Well, we're pissed at you right now, so I guess you fucked up!" She responded.
Before this could escalate further, everyone's attention was redirected towards the kitchen door as it was pushed open.
"Will!" Charlie greeted as the man of the hour appeared, "What're you doing here?" She nervously asked.
"I asked the others where you all were...said you were still in the kitchen..." He answered.
"So you came to see what we were doing?" Vagatha asked.
"No...I came to tell you the others are messing with your displays..." He informed.
Upon hearing that, Charlie's eyes shot open, and she rushed out of the room.
"GUYS! THOSE ARE MEANT FOR WILL!" She shouted out, hoping they hadn't done that much.
"Not five minutes into this meeting, and it's already falling apart," Vagatha said with a sigh before following after her, also irritated the others disrupted the displays.
After her departure Lilith, Nifty, and Alastor followed, the two women wanting to help Charlie and Vagatha, while the radio demon just wanted to watch the fun. This left Angel Dust alone with Will, which was something the former had been wanting since he got back.
"Huh...we're alone..." He spoke slowly while taking a few steps closer, "Just you...me...this big kitchen..." He continued.
"Where are the chefs?..." The Slayer asked.
"Oh, the cooking got done a little bit before I came in here. So before you showed up, Charlie and them let the cooks take off until lunchtime rolls around." He explained before suddenly wrapping his arms around the Slayer's neck, "And now that they're gone, you know what we could do, right?" He asked.
Remaining silent as he was genuinely trying to figure out what Angel Dust was getting at, this caused the other to lean in close and whisper in his ear after a few seconds.
"You...and me...can try all the food before anyone else~," He said sensually.
"...We can what?" The Slayer questioned.
"We can eat the food!" He exclaimed with a smile before pulling away so he could gesture to the plates nearby resting on top of the counters and the isle in the middle of the space, "Look all of this shit! Now we're not going to eat all of it, we're not pigs, but we can nibble and taste them to get a head start. What do you say?" He asked.
"I'm pretty sure that'd just make Charlie angrier..." The Slayer answered.
"Ah, come on, Will! This is like the LEAST harmful thing you could do!" He exclaimed before wrapping an arm around his neck again, "Besides, all of this IS for you and your big shindig. So the way I see it, you're just doing what they would've had you do before they ask you to do it, get me?" He explained.
"I guess that makes sense..." The Slayer replied.
"Right? So come on, let your hair down, so to say, and just enjoy yourself." He urged before adorning a slightly softer expression, "And if not for yourself, for me maybe? I mean, it has been half a year since I got to see ya big guy, so it's been a while since you and I have had some kind of fun together." He said.
Although he didn't want to be rude to Charlie or be disrespectful to all the effort she'd gone through, seeing the ordinarily sex-crazed spider act in such a way was the extra push he needed to be on board.
"Fine...but only small bites..." The Slayer told him, which brought back his face-covering smile.
"Fuck yeah, Will! Now you're letting loose!" Angel Dust cheered while fist-bumping the air.
Elsewhere...Unknown...
A cold empty wind blew through vacant metal hallways, entering through holes either cause by long-forgotten damage or the test of the time. Once filled with life, whether it be footsteps of the living or the machinery's heat, now the metal that made the walls, floors, and ceilings were colder than arctic ice. Which in many ways was darkly fitting, for filling these passageways were dried stains of crimson red and decrepit bones, all belonging to the former residents of this abandoned structure. Who they were and what purpose they served was also lost to memory, for those that now traversed these grounds cared not for their corpses, which was made evident as they crushed their skulls beneath their feet in their march.
Five was the total number of these beings, each similar in height and size with the same armor and weapons carried on their bodies. They were there for a reason, an important one at that, carrying out the will of their master to help bring about a new age, one that had been delayed endlessly by a stubborn bastard. What this reason was only they and their lord knew, as well as an outsider who for the moment served their master as they did, but they believed in due time he'd be put in his proper place. Until then, they held their tongue and dared not share any thoughts they may have; they were but extensions of the Dark One's power and were privileged to know life, especially now that they had been given even greater power than they once possessed.