"I-I don't think I understand." Dimitri stuttered, face reddening until the tips of his ears were burning with his embarrassment.
"In Remire, you told me there was a difference between asking you to kiss me and telling you it is okay." Eve said gently, smiling at his rather predictable yet endearing reaction to her request.
"I also said that I wanted you to ask me when it was something you truly wanted, not something you thought I wanted." Dimitri replied with a frown before adding, "is this something you want?"
"Part of Fodlan's wedding tradition is to seal the union with a kiss, no?" Eve cocked her head to the side.
"That's correct." Dimitri nodded.
"I don't want our first kiss to be a spectacle." Eve took a small step forward, reaching out to take Dimitri's hand in hers. "Sylvain told me you've never kissed anyone before. You deserve to have your first kiss be something special and personal, not something designed by the Church."
"So, you're still doing this for me and not yourself?" Dimitri's brow furrowed and there was something in his eyes Eve couldn't place. Was it sadness? Disappointment?
"No." Eve shook her head with a sigh. "What I'm trying to say is I want to prove to you that I'm serious about learning to love you. And as part of that, I want the first kiss we share to be something we both want—not a performance that I'm putting on. I don't want there to be any room for you to convince yourself that kissing you wasn't something I wanted."
"Is this truly something that you want?" Dimitri asked.
"Yes." Eve nodded assuredly. "I want you to kiss me if that is something you also want."
"Eve, I have wanted to kiss you since the moment I told you I loved you." Dimitri half sighed, half laughed as he reached out to cradle her face in his hands.
"Wait." Eve said, drawing her face back quickly. She instantly regretted it, though, seeing how Dimitri's features dropped.
"Have I done something wrong?" He asked, eyes scanning her face for any sign of offense.
"I want you to take your gloves off." Said Eve.
"What?" Dimitri's brow furrowed in confusion.
"I want you to touch me directly with those hands that you feel are so sullied and blood stained." Eve explained. "I want to show you that I am not afraid of whoever you think you are. And I want you to see that you cannot tarnish me."
Dimitri faltered for a moment, pulling back his gloved hands to look at them. When had she noticed? When had she seen right through to his heart and understood why he wore his gloves?
Ever since Duscur, Dimitri had felt cursed. Everything he touched, everything he loved, crumbled to dust and died. How many spears had he broken inadvertently with his brutish strength that he couldn't control? How much blood had soaked his pale hands? He had started wearing gloves to conceal those sullied hands, to hide the blood that he saw on them. But even gloved, back in Remire, he had managed to tarnish Eve. Had it been then that she saw his insecurities? Or had she noticed him far earlier than that?
"You don't have to be afraid, Dimitri." Eve said softly, reaching out to take one of his hands in her own.
Gently, she unfastened his gauntlet and set it on the windowsill beside them. Dimitri watched in wonder as she then pulled his glove from his hand with a tenderness he wished he could convince himself was love. And he stood frozen as she pulled his now bare hand up to cradle her cheek.
Her skin was warm beneath his fingers; he had expected it to be cold after she had spent all this time up in the tower. But it was as if she were a hearth, filled with embers and raw energy that felt almost dangerous to touch.
"See?" Eve pulled his hand away to show him her face. "I'm no different."
"I cannot fathom how you thought I would not have fallen in love with you." Dimitri sighed.
"I just don't think I ever considered it." Eve shook her head lightly as she set to work unfastening his other gauntlet.
"I promise you, Eve," Dimitri said as he took both of his now bare hands to hold Eve's face as gently as he could, "that I will not stop loving you. I will do everything in my power to make our union a happy one."
"You are only eighteen." Eve sighed, suddenly overcome by sadness. "You've only just become a man less than a week ago, and yet I have forced you to make promises like this. I wish I could give you your youth back, Dimitri."
"I don't need my youth if I have you." He said as he finally closed the gap between them to press his lips to hers.
Eve instantly felt bad that her first thoughts were ones comparing Dimitri's kiss to Felix's. Where Felix's kisses had been rushed, frantic, and hungry, Dimitri's was instead tentative and timid. Felix's kisses had been filled with desperation, but Dimitri's was filled with longing.
Dimitri, for his part, could not quell the anxiety that turned in his stomach as they kissed. He had always expected a first kiss to be something beautiful and romantic. But as he pressed his lips to Eve's all he felt was awkward and unsure. Was he doing this right? Would she rather be kissing Felix right now? He was painfully aware of his inexperience, painfully aware of Eve's plethora of experience.
"I'm sorry," were the first words out of Dimitri's mouth as they parted.
"Why?" Eve asked, pulling back to look Dimitri in the eye.
"You're probably used to better." Dimitri looked away in embarrassment.
"I'm used to different." Eve said. "That doesn't necessarily mean better."
"Are you sure about this, Eve?" Dimitri asked, as if suddenly he had been able to remove himself from his own overwhelming emotions.
"About what, the kiss?" Eve cocked her head to the side. "It's not as if you can take it back now."
"I mean marrying me." Dimitri shook his head. "Going through with the wedding, promising to learn to love me. You told me you love Felix. Was that a lie?"
"It wasn't." Eve said solemnly. "I wish it had been one of my lies, but it's the truth. I love Felix. And I know I can't shut that off completely or immediately. But I've made my decision."
She didn't tell him how it hadn't been her who made the decision. She didn't mention how she had gone to the Goddess Tower to pray to Sothis to show her the right path. She didn't say how a cruel part of her had been hoping it was Felix who would come up those steps. And she definitely did not divulge that up until the moment he had called out to her, Eve had not made up her mind on who to choose.
"But have you made your decision for yourself or for me?" Dimitri asked with a frown.
"I…" Eve faltered. She couldn't really say either way because she hadn't been the one to make the decision, the Goddess had.
"I don't want your pity, Eve." Dimitri said when she didn't respond. "I want your love."
"And you will have it." Eve sighed, reaching out to cup his cheek. "In time. Just give me some time, Dimitri. But I promise you everything between Felix and I stops now. I've let this go on long enough."
"But will you be happy?" Dimitri took her hand from his face to hold it in both of his. Where her face had been warm and full of embers, her fingers were cold as ice.
"I know you, Dimitri." Eve said as she looked down at her hand in his. "I know you will do everything in your power to make me happy—whether I deserve it or not."
"When Rodrigue asked me to help you, I accepted his proposal for selfish reasons." Dimitri admitted out loud for the first time. "I thought that if I could save you from whatever it was he was trying to protect you from, I'd be allowed to live. I thought that helping you would clear my conscience."
"Did it?" Eve asked.
"At first." Dimitri nodded sheepishly. He wasn't quite sure why he was telling her all this. "And then I fell in love with you. I saw the fear in your eyes when I first told you I loved you. And then I watched as you fell in love with Felix. My marrying you became a burden and a shackle rather than a liberation. I was preventing you from being with the person you truly loved."
"None of that was your fault, though." Eve shook her head.
"I should have agreed to help you because you were someone in need, not because I wanted to feel better." Dimitri hung his head in shame.
"You didn't even know me, Dimitri." Eve said gently. "And in many ways, you still don't. I don't fault you for your motives because either way you still helped me—helped a stranger."
"Do you think you'll ever allow me to know you?" Dimitri asked and his tone broke Eve's heart.
"I don't know." Eve wrapped her arms around herself. "There is much about me that is dangerous to know. And there is even more about me that I am afraid to let others know."
Dimitri had no response for this, and Eve knew that her secrecy made him incredibly sad. All he wanted was to love her, to know the woman he was going to spend the rest of his life with.
"We should get back." Dimitri said, reaching out his hand for Eve to take. "We've been gone long enough at this point."
Wordlessly, Eve took his hand as they moved to descend the stairs together. And as she did so, she did not miss his astonishment or the slight squeeze he gave her fingers as if afraid she might slip away at any moment.
Felix stared at his own reflection in the mirror with a grimace on his face. Today was worse than the others. He knew it was because of what was happening today; he knew it was because of all the questions still surrounding Eve's relationship with his brother. But today, more so than other days, all Felix could see in the mirror was Glenn's face looking back at him.
It happened more often than Felix cared to admit. Every once in a while, he would find himself unable to distance himself from the features he shared with his brother. It was why he always wore his hair up in a bun. If he wore it fully down, he looked too much like his father. But Glenn had worn his hair half up, so Felix couldn't do that either.
Experimentally, Felix gathered his hair together. He let his thumbs graze his temples as he sectioned off the hair just above his ears. Watching his reflection the whole time, Felix held the strands up. He held his hair in a half ponytail before twisting it up into a bun. This was how Glenn had worn his hair—half of it up in a bun while the other half brushed his shoulders.
It was a stupid way to wear one's hair—purely cosmetic. There was no functionality to only putting up half of your hair. Someone could still grab it, or it could get caught in something. This was also why Felix chastised Eve for never putting her hair up in battle. But that had been Glenn. He didn't care about the functionality of what he did; Glenn wanted to look good and be better.
"Hey, Fe, head's up."
An abrupt knock at the door brought Felix out of his thoughts and he let his hair fall back down as he moved away from the mirror to open his door.
"What do you want?" He sneered at Sylvain who stood in his doorway, all dressed up.
"Woah, still in your pyjamas?" Sylvain chuckled, eyes widening as he looked down at his friend. "You know the wedding is in a few hours, yeah?"
"I don't get why everyone has to be there. And in this ridiculous garb to boot." Felix turned slightly to motion back at the outfit laid across his bed.
Some of the Church staff had gone around handing them out a few days prior. Apparently, the Archbishop had wanted to ensure everyone had the correct attire for the occasion. But the high collared white shirt with a waistcoat seemed nothing but ridiculous to Felix. And to make it all worse, the provided jacket had coattails that made Felix feel like some kind of exotic bird.
"Even if he wasn't our friend, Felix, he's still the Crowned Prince of Faerghus. As heirs to noble houses, we ought to be there." Sylvain said.
"Don't say that like you've ever cared what you 'ought' to do as an heir." Felix rolled his eyes. "And besides, calling the boar my friend is a bit of a stretch."
"Fe…" Sylvain sighed.
"Listen, did you come here to spout nonsense, or did you have some business with me?" Felix frowned and crossed his arms, unwilling to be on the receiving end of such a disappointed look from someone like Sylvain.
"Oh, yeah." Sylvain perked up as if he himself had also forgotten why he was there. "I came to tell you your dad is here."
"My father?" Felix recoiled. "Why is that fool here?"
"He said something or another about wanting to see His Highness into this new chapter of his life since, you know…" Sylvain trailed off, looking over to the side and rubbing the back of his neck uncomfortably.
"Still worrying over what a dead man might think." Felix huffed bitterly. "Some things never change I guess."
"Well, I figured you'd want to avoid him for as long as possible, so here's your warning that he's here." Sylvain shrugged.
"Where are you hurrying off to?" Felix raised an eyebrow. "The wedding isn't for a couple more hours, so why are you already dressed?"
"I'm going to see Eve." Sylvain said as if it should have been obvious. "She's all alone right now because you're too busy wallowing in self-pity and His Highness isn't allowed to see her until the ceremony."
It wasn't often that Sylvain was serious, but Felix could tell by his tone that he was genuinely annoyed. And it was true that Felix had been so absorbed in his own feelings that he didn't even think about how Eve might be doing.
She had disappeared the night before for a considerable amount of time before returning by the boar prince's side. Something about her demeanour at that time had changed, and it scared Felix. He was worried that something was different, but he also didn't have the courage to approach her about it. There was no way he could have talked to her right then in the middle of the festivities; he knew he couldn't trust himself not to get heated over whatever it was. But when the night ended and everyone retired to their quarters, he simply couldn't bring himself to go see her. What if something had changed? Would he want to know? For as long as he didn't talk to her, nothing was different.
"Figure it out, Fe." Sylvain said, surprising Felix who hadn't noticed he was still standing there. "Whatever it is you're thinking about."
"I don't need advice from you." Felix snapped and stepped back to slam the door shut.
Sylvain was the last person he wanted to hear any advice from, but it was true that he had to figure out whatever it was he was going through. Why did his chest feel so tight? He had known this was going to happen; he had always known this was how his relationship with Eve ended.
But was he so foolish for hoping that he could change her mind? Back in Fraldarius she had admitted to his brother's grave that she was in love with him. But even then, she had made a point to tell Felix's father that she did not think she would ever tell him the whole truth—whatever that may be.
Felix only wished he had more time; he wished he had not spent so much of their time together angry about one thing or another. How many times had he senselessly snapped at her? How many times had he let his jealousy spoil what little time they did have? And even now, when she was alone and preparing herself to take part in a wedding she didn't want to be in, he was busy wallowing in his own self-pity rather than being there for her.
And as Felix turned back to his mirror, he almost wished he saw his brother's face looking back at him. But now, all he saw was himself—selfish and cowardly.
Sylvain would not find Eve in her room when he went looking for her. In fact, she wouldn't even know that he had come to find her. She had left her room long ago, well before the sun had risen on Garreg Mach, to find solace on the roof of the cathedral.
"Do you think they'll let me take you?" Eve asked softly to her wyvern as she stroked its snout.
The beast chuffed in response, nuzzling into her hand with what looked like content in its eyes.
"Perhaps if I say I've bonded with you and can fly no other wyvern they'll let me take you back to Fhirdiad with me." She said with a hum. "Do you think you'd mind the cold too terribly?"
The wyvern didn't respond, only settling down with a huff as it knew the two of them would be up on the roof for quite some time more.
"Should I name you?" Eve asked. "I know Marianne and Ferdinand have given many of the horses names. Perhaps you should have one as well."
With that, Eve brought her face close to that of the winged beast to whisper the name she thought of. There was power in a name, Eve of all people knew this, so she would not let it out into the world so lightly.
"Do you like it?" She pulled back to once again stroke its head. "I think it suits a handsome wyvern like yourself."
"I can't believe you have everyone fooled that you can't fly." A jovial voice chuckled from behind Eve.
"Claude!" She started, whipping around to see him landing his wyvern with expert care.
"And yet you have such a close relationship with your wyvern." Claude finished his sentence as he dismounted.
"He's not mine." Eve said with a hint of melancholy as she turned to look at her flying partner.
"Try telling him that." Claude grinned as he came to sit next to Eve on the roof. "How're you feeling, princess?"
"Feeling like I'd much prefer you not call me that." Eve grumbled, pulling her knees to her chest. "What are you doing up here anyways?"
"I came looking for you." Claude explained. "I figured on a day like today you'd be up here."
"I always knew this was why I was here." Eve sighed, turning her face upwards to let the breeze caress her face. "My coming to Garreg Mach was always leading up to this very moment. So why do I still dread it so?"
"Dimitri will treat you well, you know." Claude said softly. "From where I'm standing, it looks like he really loves you."
"You know that's not what I'm worried about." Eve tilted her head to look at Claude from the corner of her eye.
"Then why do it?" Claude asked, confusion furrowing his brow. "You hate the Church. And I can't fully get a read on your relationship with Rhea, but that's tumultuous at best."
"I'm not doing it for Rhea or the Church." Eve shook her head. "Fodlan is cracking at the seams, and I will not do anything that could make people perceive the Church of Serios or The Holy Kingdom of Faerghus as weak. If I don't go along with this wedding, then I show people that just one young girl could defy the most powerful figures in Fodlan."
"What do you mean Fodlan is cracking at the seams?" Claude frowned.
"Don't act coy like I don't know you snuck into the Professor's office to read her report on Remire." Eve huffed in a humourless laugh. "You're worried too. Tomas, what happened in Remire, it's all part of something bigger."
"But why do you care?" Claude pressed. "What stake to you have in this game? You're not even from Fodlan."
"I could ask you the same thing, Khalid." Eve turned to him, putting emphasis on his Alymran name.
"Fodlan is my mother's homeland." Claude replied.
"As it is mine." Eve said, her words catching in her throat. "My mother loved her homeland. I couldn't save my own, but if I can help preserve hers…"
She trailed off, looking out and over the horizon where the sun was still lazily hanging low as if just as reluctant as Eve was to start the day. That was right, her homeland no longer existed. Fodlan was the only home she had now; it was the country her mother had so adored and told her so many stories about. It was her duty to protect it.
"I made this for you." Claude said suddenly, thrusting his closed fist out towards Eve.
"For me?" Eve cocked her head to the side as she held out her hand below his.
Into her outstretched hand, Claude dropped a small wooden figure. After a moment of inspection, Eve recognised it as a small carving of a wyvern. In fact, it was specifically the same wyvern she had flown up to the roof with. She could tell by its distinctive notch in its left wing. Between its tiny wooden teeth, a small hole had been bored through which a piece of leather cord was fed so that she could wear it around her neck.
"You made this yourself?" Eve asked, turning the figurine over in her hands.
"Blow on it." Claude said with a grin.
"Blow?" Eve frowned.
"Look at the tail." Claude pointed excitedly.
Eve had missed it before but now that it was pointed out to her, she could see an opening in the tail and another one hidden beneath one of the ridges of the wyvern's back.
"It's a whistle." Claude smiled proudly, clearly satisfied with his handiwork.
Tentatively, Eve brought the tail of the figurine to her lips and blew. She heard no sound, but almost immediately her wyvern brought its head up and looked at her expectantly.
"It produces a sound only wyverns can hear." Claude explained. "My father taught me how to make them. If you train your wyvern enough it can come from across a battlefield at the blow of that whistle."
"Thank you, Claude." Eve smiled. "I don't know what I did to deserve such a thoughtful gift."
"Consider it a wedding present." He shrugged, clasping his hands behind his head casually.
"I know you only became my friend because I'm meant to be the future Queen of Faerghus," Eve began, looking down at the figurine in her hands, "but I do enjoy your company, Claude."
"I'll be honest," Claude said, "I wasn't planning on actually liking you. I thought I'd get into your good favour for when you married His Princeliness and you'd be a powerful ally to have. But now I see that you have a vision for a better Fodlan that very much aligns with what I hope to see this nation become. And as phony as it might sound, I genuinely consider you a friend now."
"If only Edelgard felt that way." Eve sighed. "Perhaps then we could have unity in Fodlan."
"Edelgard? What does she have to do with anything?" Claude asked.
"I don't know." Eve shrugged. "I just get the feeling she doesn't much care for me. Ever since word of my Crest got out, I've felt a certain animosity from her."
"She might just be jealous because she's got a crush on your fiancée." Claude offered with a smirk.
"Do you actually believe that?" Eve laughed.
"No, but I thought it might make you laugh." Claude grinned.
"Thank you." Eve said soberly, looking at Claude directly so he knew she was serious.
"For what?" Claude asked.
"I came up here to be alone." Eve said softly. "But that's not what I really wanted. I'm conflicted and I'm upset because I made my decision long ago and I shouldn't still be conflicted. I needed a friend and somehow you knew to come here right at the perfect moment."
"I'm happy to be of service." Claude dipped his head in a shallow bow, a small grin on his face. "Now let's get you down to the ground. You've got a wedding to get ready for."