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"But love, he is soooo demanding" Jack whimpered as he stormed around the back yard waiting on the dogs to do their business, "Ringo seems to get more out of him than I can. Myfanwy is pretending he's not there doing it!"
"Seems to work for me sometimes too" Ianto answered.
"Darling… are you SURE you can't come up for a day? Like… Walter surely has that backdrop he wants now… you can't paint ALL weekend" Jack knew he was whining but … damn… he was so tired. Hawk insisted on sleeping in the big bed and Jack found himself at three in the morning on the floor with a pillow and the foot rug as the little shit-bird took the entire thing, complaining that he was too hot to sleep with. It was not until the next morning that it occurred to him that Ianto complained if Hawk doing this and he didn't understand until now what he meant.
"DADDDDDDDDDDYYYYYYYYYYYYY"
"I gotta go love, he's screaming again. I thought that DVD might occupy him but… may a spin around the lake in the boat?" Jack was out of ideas.
"Take the half loaf of bread in the blue bag, that is for the birds. He can sit on the bow of the boat and feed them, the fish will be happy as well, then he will be able to pretend something" Ianto crooned "Tell him it's a world of water and you are the saviors come to feed the starving inhabitants or something."
"Yeah… I can do that…we can…"
"DDDDDDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD!"
"Shit, he's elongating the A part, he's verging on a meltdown, got to go sweet cheeks" Jack then made kissy nosiness and hung up, turning to find the shit-bird behind him with a look of doom.
"What are you doing?"
"I just rang Taddy to say how cool it is out here and that we miss him but are big boys and now we are going to play a game" Jack said all in a rush.
"Oh?"
"Yes. The Lake is a planet, the entire thing water and the people have turned into fishes to survive. We are a rescue squad come from a space ship and we have our big hover boat… we are going t to drive out onto the water with the bread to crumble over the side so those poor starving fish people can survive." Jack was quite pleased with himself, even sounded like his idea.
Hawk stared at him then said "The blue bag?"
Little shit-bird. Maybe having it on speaker phone was not a good idea, that little shit-bird had such good hearing.
They both started to move towards the house and the game that Hawk actually seemed to like, even if the dogs were now shitting in the marigolds. FUCK… Ianto would kill him… a quick poop scoop first.
Then the boat!
For Hawk… of course.