A/N: This is the promised Merlin whump chapter. TISSUE WARNING but don't worry, I'm a mean cliff hanger person but it's ok. I feel bad hahah but tomorrow, everything will be redeemed.

Chapter 49

Merlin sat in the back of the car on the drive back to England so he could cuddle with the dogs. Every few seconds, Arthur glanced at him in the mirror to make sure he was ok, under the pretence of making sure all their friends' cars were behind them. They had to stop regularly for multiple reasons: the kids getting restless, the dogs needing to stretch their legs, the drivers needing a rest, the baby needing to be fed or changed.

The dogs had to stay in the car on the ferry so Merlin and Arthur stayed with them, too.

"Just a few more hours," Arthur said.

"Five is more than a few."

"It'll pass in no time."

"I want to be at home in our bed."

"We will be tonight," Arthur promised, "And we'll be able to have the dogs in the bed with us for cuddles. You sure you don't want to get out and see everyone?"

Merlin nodded, "You can if you want."

"No, I won't leave you here alone. Hang on, I'll come and sit with you in the back."

Arthur got out of the car and squidged himself beside Merlin in the back. Aithusa growled in annoyance but settled herself again on his lap.

"How long are we taking off work, then?"

"I want to go back. Only part-time but I want to be there."

"Merls, I don't think that's a good idea."

"Look, I know I was a mess when Gaius died and we shouldn't have been at work. I know I'm a mess now. And I know what happened with Alistair and his brother and the Druids should be some sort of warning. But this is different. Mum was so, so proud of us for what we did. And I can't sit at home and think constantly about how she's gone and she won't come back. I want to think about her in a way that's positive. I promise I'll take it easy and if you think I'm not fit to be in the office you can tell me to go and I will without a word. I just can't bear the idea of sitting at home uselessly doing nothing for a few weeks."

"Ok. But part time only," Arthur kissed Merlin's forehead.

When they finally got home, Arthur started cooking dinner, Freya and Matt went upstairs to get the girls settled and Merlin went for a shower. When Arthur went upstairs to bring him a cup of tea, the bedroom was empty and the shower was still running. Arthur frowned, put the mug on Merlin's bedside table and went into the bathroom.

"Merlin, gorgeous? You ok?"

He approached the shower in the corner and peered in, calling out a warning to Merlin so he didn't take him completely by surprise. Merlin was sitting against the wall of the shower, water battering him. He was curled up sobbing. Arthur sighed sadly and reached across to turn the water off then grabbed a towel to wrap Merlin up in.

"Come on, up you get."

Together, they stumbled through to the bedroom and Arthur helped Merlin dry off and change.

"What happened, Merls?"

"It just hits me sometimes," he said sheepishly, "That she can't come back and she's gone and she suffered so much. I know adults are supposed to be strong through stuff like this, but I can't-"

"No one's meant to be anything," Arthur cut him off, "No one is expecting you to be ok if you're not ok, ok?"

"I'm not," Merlin said sadly.

"I know. But you will be. What do you need?"

"To dry my hair. It's freezing and wet and it's dripping all down my neck."

Arthur smiled, "Dinner in ten minutes."

"I'll be down in five."

"Take your time."

Two days later, they were all at work in the office. Freya and Matt stayed at home with the twins as they'd opted for time off to mourn. Merlin and Arthur were only staying for half a day to see how they felt.

"Crazy idea," Gwaine said in their daily meeting.

"Oh no," Arthur teased, "Here we go."

"No, it's good."

Everyone looked at him sceptically.

"Trust me, ok," Gwaine sat up, "About half an hour/ forty minutes away from here, there's an old country estate. Huge old historical house, tonnes of gardens and walks, a little forest, a lake. Really, the grounds are massive. I did research on it. The house was passed down through a family and a few months ago, one of the last descendants died. The only relative left is his daughter who decided she didn't want to take the house on and is selling it. There are already workers employed to look after everything so it's in amazing condition. But now, the house is abandoned and all those people are out of jobs. I think we should buy it."

"Why?" Morgana asked.

"Because everything we have- restaurants, hotels, bars, the library, the function rooms, everything. It's all for adults. But there are so many children with disabilities who might not live to be adults to appreciate what we've created. We need something for them. So, I thought, we buy the grounds, convert it properly so it has all the facilities, maybe add a bird of prey centre or a petting zoo or something with rescues. Maybe make a play park or a zip line. We can hold kids parties, give them the chance to have nice experiences. It's not too far away from the city so it's accessible, we'd be saving loads of people their jobs, making kids happy, expanding the business, we could even make it educational! And there's a child's hospice within twenty minutes. Wouldn't it be amazing to give them somewhere to go on their birthdays or for a day trip with their families without them having to go really far? What do you all think?"

"I love it," Merlin said immediately, "I'm in."

"So am I," Percival said, almost looking annoyed that Merlin had beaten him to it.

"It's a great idea," Gwen agreed.

Gwaine smiled proudly and looked to Morgana who sighed, pursed her lips and nodded a bit, "I think it's definitely worth a few inquiries."

Gwaine grinned, "Thank you, thank you."

"I'll get on it," Merlin offered, "I've not got much to do today here that I can't finish at home."

"No promises," Leon reminded him, "We're just gathering information to clear later."

"I got it," Merlin promised, "Gwaine did you find a number?"

Less than an hour later, Merlin turned triumphantly to face the room and slammed his phone down, "So as it would turn out, Mr Simmons who owned the grounds was a regular customer at Albion and really admired our business. I was put in touch with the daughter who said her father would have been thrilled to know we would take over. She has a few conditions: we keep on all the staff, there are certain rooms in the house she wants kept away from the public, things like that. But if we agree to all of it, she's willing to give it to us for half the price it's advertised for."

"How on earth did you manage that?" Elyan asked with a broad grin.

"I have my ways," Merlin smirked, "She's going to contact the lawyers, draw up an agreement and come over if we decide we want it. As long as we need to think, she'll wait."

"I'll need some numbers," Lancelot said, "Even with the reduction in price, the renovations, any other attractions we want to add, it's going to cost a lot. But I can look into it over the next few days and we can sort out a meeting."

"We're off until Thursday," Arthur reminded him.

"Perfect. So I'll do some number checking and we can meet back up on Thursday."

For the next couple of days, Merlin, Arthur, Freya, Matt and the twins went on trips out to the beach or on walks around the nearby countryside. On Thursday, Merlin and Arthur got up early and got ready for work to head in for the meeting. There were long, extensive discussions but in the end, they decided it was worth every extra penny they'd save to add all of Gwaine's suggested facilities, even if it was just basic to begin with. Apparently there was a rescue centre for birds of prey nearby which had been on its last legs without the money to continue renting their current location. When Gwen had come across the information, she'd swooped at the chance to offer them to relocate to their new grounds. Like a business within a business.

"I think we should do it," Lancelot had concluded, "Who's in?"

One by one, everyone around the table nodded.

"Great. Merlin, could you get in contact with Miss Simmons?"

"I'll do it right away."

A meeting was arranged with her, her father's lawyers and a few of the RM team including Lancelot, Gwen and Merlin for two weeks from then. In the meantime, she was going to send across blueprints, photographs, a few bits of paperwork, things like that so they could make a start.

And when Miss Simmons did come in to see them, there seemed to be hundreds of things to go through. She insisted she was happy to help whatever way she could seeing as there was nothing she'd lose from it. She already had a house, a job and a family so she was well-off enough and would only be earning more, even by selling the grounds for less than half their actual price. She was going to contact all the old staff and offer them their jobs back, explain what was going to happen and give them information on what training they'd need.

"We're planning to open in summer," Merlin had told her.

"Why wait that long?"

"Weather, firstly. We could have most of the adjustments installed within a couple of months but that'll take it to February which won't make for much of a nice opening. Also in the summer holidays, there'll be more people around."

"But surely from a finance point of view for every second you're ready to open and not, you're losing money. And that's even more time for people to be out of their jobs," one of the lawyers said.

"Why not spring? The Easter holidays are at the end of March this year. Schools will be closed, the weather won't be awful and I know for a fact how beautiful all the grounds are in spring. It's be lovely."

Merlin, Gwen and Lance shared a look, "That could work. We'll talk about it. It depends on how long it's going to take for the café and kitchens to be finished."

"How much work needs doing?" Miss Simmons asked.

"We're converting the barn, stables and shed into a café for lunches and hot drinks and things," Gwen said, "Then the play park needs constructing, the bird of prey centre needs building and the birds need to get comfortable there. Obviously we need a reception/ welcome area. Then it's little things like sign-posts, installing the statues and fountains and extra small bits, making it all accessible to everyone of course. Finding extra staff and training everyone, checks, inspections, toilets somewhere."

"Basically the big building works and then the details, most of which can be sorted at the same time."

"Can you do it all in four months?"

"Maybe. It'll be a push but we'll try. Staff training usually takes three to six months so we might need to take employees from other branches until they're sorted."

"Then there's the issues of working over Christmas."

It took all day and seemingly hundreds of cups of tea. Discussions, debates, compromises. About a thousand pages of notes. Finally it seemed like they had a plan of action and all shook hands before getting ready to go.

"We're going to need to know how many of your staff are happy to continue with us by next week," Lance said on the way out, "So we know how many jobs to advertise."

"I'll contact them tonight," she promised.

Lancelot escorted everyone out and Gwen went back into the main office with Merlin. From then on, they were constantly busy all day working to get everything sorted for the new opening in a few months.

One morning, Merlin hadn't been feeling great and decided to take the day off to try and sort himself out. Arthur had still gone because everything was so hectic at work. Merlin was sitting outside by the firepit with the dogs, wrapped up warmly against the icy December air.

"Merls, we're going to take the girls for a walk, do you want us to take the dogs, too?"

"That'd be amazing, thank you so much."

"You'll be ok by yourself?"

"Of course. Take your time."

"See you soon."

Arthur left work early. He'd been worried about Merlin all day because he'd been so upset that morning. Sometimes everything that had happened to mother really hit him hard and left him in an awful state. Arthur thought that he'd appreciate a cuddle and some attention to cheer him up.

But when he got into the house, there was an awful, awful smell. Arthur grimaced, covered his nose with his sleeve and carefully went inside. It didn't take him long to find the reason for the smell. The chimney in the living room where they had their gas fire had completely collapsed. Arthur cursed and ran forward. Because poking out from all the bricks he was squashed under was a very familiar arm and head.

"Merlin!" Arthur fell to his knees and started clearing a few of the bricks away and pressed his fingers to Merlin's neck, "Oh, thank god." He grabbed his phone and called the fire service. "It's my husband, the chimney in our living room collapsed and he's trapped under it," he explained as clearly as he could given the fact his mouth and nose were covered, "There's gas leaking into the house."

"Is the victim awake?"

"No. I can't wake him up, he's not responding at all."

"I need an address, please, sir."

Arthur fired it off immediately, stroking Merlin's hair comfortingly.

"Is there anyone else in the house?"

"No, it's just us, I got back from work and found him like this."

"Sir, there's help on the way already, I need you to get out of the house right now."

"What, no! I won't leave him."

"Sir, the gas is very dangerous, you need to save yourself and let us help your husband.

"How long will it take for them to get here?"

There was a pause, "ETA is six minutes."

"That's too long! I don't know how long he's been like this, I'm not going to stand outside and wait while he's in here dying!"

"Sir, if the gas is coming from a fireplace, it could ignite at any second and your entire house would explode. You have to get out."

"No, I won't let him die alone like this."

Matthew's voice shouted from the doorway. Arthur could hear Killi barking from outside.

"Arthur, what's- oh god," Matt snatched the phone and spoke to the handler, "Arthur, come on, we have to get out."

"No, don't you get it?" he snapped, "This is exactly how Will died. Crushed, alone and in a fire. I'm not letting it happen to Merlin too."

"It won't, they'll be here in time."

"Then I can stay here until they arrive. In time."

"Arthur this gas is going to kill us all!"

"I won't leave him, do you understand?"

"You think I want you to? This is my wife's brother- the only family she has left. But the services will be here in time and I'd so much rather it was only one of us getting treated in hospital instead of all three of us. Come on, Arthur, let's get out. Now!"

Arthur remained where he was for a few moments before leaning forward, kissing Merlin and standing up, "You're going to be ok."

They were nearly out the living room when Merlin's voice stopped Arthur.

"Arthur, I can't breathe," was all he said but it was so pain-filled and agonized.

Matt closed his eyes sadly but pulled at Arthur's arm. They burst into the front and began gasping for fresh air. The twins were both sobbing and hiding in their mother's clothing while Killi and Aithusa barked madly.

"Where's Merlin?" Freya demanded.

"Baby, we have to move away from the house," Matt said, "Come on, help is coming."

"Where is he? What's happened?"

"Freya, please. Get the girls away."

They walked across the road to the field opposite the house and Arthur fell to his knees, shaking.

"Tell me, Matt," Freya begged desperately, "Where's Merlin?"

Just as he was about to explain, smoke began rising from the house, billowing out of windows and what remained of the chimney. "It's on fire," Arthur said, shooting to his feet and making to run back to the house. Matt all but tackled him to keep him still, "The firemen are here," he said, "You have to stay back."

"He'll burn alive. He was awake!"

"Don't make them rescue you both of you," Matt hissed, "They'll get him."

"What's going on here," a fireman approached them, "Is someone in here?"

"The chimney collapsed on him when he was putting the gas fire on," Matt explained, "There's gas leaking everywhere and he's trapped under tonnes of bricks. It started burning a few seconds ago."

"Do you have any idea how long he's been breathing in that gas?"

"We left him alone when we went for a walk just over an hour ago. But he was outside. We don't know when he came in."

"He was alive when we found him, please, you have to get him," Arthur begged.

"My men are on their way in already, ok, don't worry. Those of you who went in need to get checked out if you've inhaled that gas."

Freya was hysterical, Arthur was devastated, the twins were scared and confused.

When Merlin was removed from the house he was unconscious with skin practically grey, burns from his upper chest all the way down to his foot and half a brick stuck in his abdomen. Arthur battled to get to him through the firemen but he was held back until Merlin was put in the ambulance and whisked away.

"The gas on his lungs, it's going to kill him!" Arthur screamed in agony, "I need to see him!"

He didn't know when his sister arrived but she was soon taking him away from the bustle and sitting down with him on the grass, "Arthur you have to listen to me," she began only to be cut off.

"He's going to die," Arthur wailed, "After everything, he's-"

"Arthur, look at me!" Morgana said sharply, "You can't be there for him if you're in a mess like this. He is not going to die."

"You didn't see him. I was there, I was with him, I should have stayed! He knew I was there, he'll hate me for leaving him. It's like Camelot all over again."

"This is not like Camelot," Morgana insisted, "He's going to be ok, you'll see. Come on, I'll drive you to the hospital."

Arthur was an inconsolable mess for the entire journey. Matt had driven to Morgana's with the twins and the dogs to wait with Leon while Morgana took Arthur and Freya to the hospital. They burst into the emergency department frantically and stood out side the doors to resuscitation to watch and wait for news. But they could barely see Merlin's bed for the doctors surrounding it.

"He's doing compressions," Freya noticed in terror, "Why is he doing compressions?"

Morgana held onto Arthur and Freya's hands as they watched the team around Merlin step away from his bed and watch all the monitors as they shocked his heart with electricity.

"He's flatlining," Arthur gasped.

Merlin was shocked three more times before the lead consultant stepped away and ripped off her gloves and mask. They couldn't hear what she said but it was obvious from the solemn expressions.

Time of death, 13:54.

Arthur screamed. Actually, genuinely screamed, louder than it should be possible for someone to scream. It was impossible to tell whether it was from anger or heartbreak but it was the worst sound Morgana had ever heard. She made no attempts to stop her brother from running into the room, straight over to what was now the corpse of his husband. Freya dropped to her knees and sobbed. Her tears weren't falling individually, it was one continuous flow. Morgana had sat down with her to try and comfort her so she was spared the sight of her brother fighting with the doctors and restarting compressions.

Arthur pounded against Merlin's chest, screaming at the doctors to do something and help. The monitors had been turned off, no one was pumping air into Merlin anymore. So Arthur ripped the tube out of Merlin's throat, probably doing considerable damage by doing so and gave him mouth to mouth breaths. He shrugged off anyone who tried to pull him away and continued in his efforts. But the breaths of air he was giving Merlin were never returned and soon it became a horrible, final kiss.