Astoria — 2nd July 2007

As I sat in the waiting area of St. Mungo's, I clasped my hands together to hide the way they were shaking. I'd Floo called my healer at nine this morning, and he urged me to get to the hospital before noon.

Narcissa tried to reassure me that the Malfoy name came with certain privileges, but she hadn't seen the healer's face when I told him about my waning magic and fatigue.

Honestly, I hadn't thought about how much weaker I'd grown until Draco and Lucius showed concern. I'd never been the most powerful witch and stress could affect a person's magic. Since I'd married Draco, I hadn't ever really calmed down. I'd constantly wondered where he was, what he was doing. And then after the Obliviation, I was fixated on keeping him away from the DMLE and happy with me. The worry that his memory would somehow be prompted never dissipated.

But, when Draco went to Hermione's and left me to my own devices the previous night, I'd thought back and tried to remember when my aunt — my father's younger sister — had fallen victim to the blood curse. The recollections were hazy at best, but small details started to stand out to me.

I'd been a child, only six years old, when she died.

She had a young son — a pureblood heir — and her health had deteriorated quickly.

Rather than trying to figure it all out on my own, I'd summoned Daphne and asked her questions. After all, she was two years older than me and sometimes remembered things more clearly than I did.

As we talked about our aunt and I confessed that I'd been weakening, her face fell and she grew more and more determined to remember what had happened.

By the end of the night, we'd pieced together a timeline.

Our cousin was born when I was three and Daphne was five. Shortly after his third birthday, Aunt Carmen died, and she'd spent her last year wasting away. Maybe even longer than that.

When I considered Scorpius' age, the similarities were eerily similar.

Daphne had offered to accompany me to the appointment, but I'd lied and said Draco would be coming with me. Her eyes had widened in surprise, but she didn't fight me. When it came down to it, I just wanted to go to this first appointment on my own.

I didn't want my sister fussing over me and feeling sorry for me, the way she always had.

Startling me from my thoughts, a medi-witch summoned me back into the exam room, took my weight, and checked my vitals.

"Mrs Malfoy, in addition to the standard checks, Healer Shafiq asked me to give you this," she said, holding up a phial of shimmering silver liquid. "It will react with your magic and allow him to check your levels and see how it's flowing."

I nodded, accepting the potion and uncorking it. Swallowing it down, I felt nothing, and I wasn't sure if that was normal or not. The medi-witch, however, was watching me closely, like she was waiting for something to happen.

"Okay, well, Healer Shafiq will be with you in a few minutes. I'll let him know that you've taken the elixir and there was no reaction."

My mind wandered back to the Hogwarts dungeons, to Professors Snape and Slughorn, trying to recall even a mention of an elixir and magic levels. But, if I was honest, I'd never paid Potions lectures much mind. I did the five standard years, scraping an Acceptable OWL, but hadn't progressed to NEWT-level studies.

Right now, I was wishing I had. But what did the future Lady Malfoy need to know about potions for? Especially advanced ones.

I'd built my entire identity around a marriage contract that Draco had never wanted and missed out on so much because of it.

Again, I clasped my hands together. My eyes scanned the signs on the walls, encouraging regular Scourgify charms and detailing the dangers of Spattergroit.

With a sigh, I settled back onto the exam table and stared up at the stark white ceiling instead.

It felt like I was waiting for an executioner rather than a healer, and I started counting, the numbers forming silently in my head with each tick of the clock.

A sharp, stabbing pain formed inside my abdomen, making me suck in a quick breath. It didn't subside; it radiated out from that spot, curling through my veins and along my nerves.

Was it from the potion? It had to have been; I'd never felt anything like it.

In an attempt to lessen the sensation, I sat up but that only made it worse. Just as I was about to stand and head for the door, it opened, revealing Healer Shafiq. He took one look at my face and where my hand was clasped and frowned, quickly drawing his wand and casting some sort of charm. Before my very eyes, I saw an outline of my body. Flickers of silver appeared throughout my arms, my head, my chest.

However, there were dark tendrils of magic furling and unfurling from my centre, originating from where the pain had begun.

The look on his face told me everything I needed to know.

Something was horribly, horribly wrong.

He cast a Patronus, sending it hurtling down the hallways, looking for a consultation from someone whose name I didn't immediately recognise.

"Are you in pain, Mrs Malfoy?"

I nodded, unable to speak.

Transferring the outline of my body onto a piece of parchment, he stepped closer and laid his hand over the exact spot the pain had begun, murmuring words I'd never heard before. His fingers pressed against it more firmly and then pulled back.

"I'm sorry, but I need to remove your dress," he warned before banishing it to the chair on the other side of the room.

His fingertips touched my bare skin and the relief was almost instantaneous. When he resumed his murmurs, it felt even better, the pain subsiding to something resembling a dull ache. A woman with long dark hair entered the room, quickly assessing the situation.

"The scan is on the counter," Healer Shafiq said, breaking the stream of unintelligible words. "Seems like some sort of dark magic."

The female healer picked up the parchment and looked at it, her eyes widening.

"Have you given birth recently?" she asked.

"J-January," I managed to respond. "T-Two Thousand and Six."

I could almost hear her mind working.

Healer Shafiq twisted his hand, and the pain was gone. When I sighed in relief, his hands left my skin, and I sat there in my bra and knickers.

"I'm Padma Patil," the woman greeted, extending her hand. I recognised her from school, but I'd never interacted with her before.

Reaching out, I shook it gently. "Astoria Malfoy."

"I called Healer Patil here because she's studying the effects of magic on the female reproductive system. The magic I saw on the scan was most concentrated around your ovaries," Healer Shafiq stated, his tone somber. "I think your case is going to require a specialist."

My eyes moved back to Padma. "And you're a specialist?"

"I am. Of course, there are several other healers within the hospital that are also specialists. I could give you a list to consider—"

"No, that's fine. I was just clarifying."

With a nod, Healer Patil began asking rapid-fire questions.

"When was your last menstrual cycle?"

"Mid-May."

"Are your cycles generally this far apart?"

"Since I had Scorpius, they haven't been regular. My body hasn't quite gone back to normal."

"Is there any chance you could be pregnant?"

I thought for a moment. "I suppose it's possible, but it's unlikely. My h-husband was casting the contraceptive every time. He doesn't want to have another baby."

Calling Draco my husband when I knew we were divorcing felt wrong, but I didn't want to explain the situation. And then I thought of my night with Marcus and couldn't clearly remember if either of us had cast a contraceptive.

At my slightly horrified expression, Padma raised her wand and ran a diagnostic. No light glowed over my abdomen, confirming that I wasn't pregnant.

Moving along, she asked, "Was your conception and pregnancy normal?"

"What do you mean?"

"Did you conceive naturally or did you require magical intervention?"

"I took a fertility potion," I admitted, biting my lip. "I hadn't been able to conceive."

She tapped her wand to my chart and frowned. "There's nothing in here about a fertility potion being administered or prescribed."

"I bought it from a private potioneer," I responded, waving her off. "I didn't want any rumours going around that I was barren."

Blinking her eyes, she made a note. "Okay. Did you conceive right away?"

"I did. I found out I was pregnant a week after taking the potion."

"Were you under the care of a healer?"

"Yes. My father-in-law had me seeing Healer Ignatius Avery."

"Did he monitor your magic levels throughout the pregnancy?" she asked.

"I'm honestly not sure," I replied, trying to think back. "I've always been a bit sickly, so the pregnancy took a lot out of me. I was always tired and shaky."

Padma made yet another note. "I'm going to need your records from him as soon as possible."

"I'll have him owl them over today." As I tried to gather my courage, I took a deep breath and then let it out slowly. She looked up at me and I asked, "Do you have any theories on what's going on?"

"There's no easy way to say this, Mrs Malfoy, but you're carrying a curse," she answered matter-of-factly. "The potion you were given reacts with a person's magic. Normally, we see a lot of silver, sometimes gold or a coppery colour, and it's usually most saturated around the heart."

"But mine was black because of the blood curse," I said, pressing my fingers into my eyes.

"Blood curse?" Healer Shafiq said.

I nodded. "There is a curse on the females in the Greengrass line. It doesn't affect every woman, but my father suspected that I inherited it. I was always weak as a child."

Focusing on me, Padma tried to hide her interest in the curse, but it was obvious she wanted to know more. "Do you know of any female relatives that were seen here?"

"Maybe my aunt. From what I can remember, she was around my age when she became ill and she had a son about the same age that Scorpius is now."

"What was her name?"

"Carmen Rosier. She died in 1988 or 1989."

Again, Padma's quill scratched against parchment, taking note of my aunt's name. "Mrs Malfoy, has your father ever mentioned if something triggers this curse to activate?"

"No, not to me," I answered. "As far as I know, it's just a curse, and I never tried to research it more because I wasn't sure if I had it or not."

She frowned and said, "Well, based on the low levels of regular magic in your system, I'd say it's likely the curse is feeding on your power."

That would explain my lack of magical strength.

I just stared at her, carefully controlling each blink.

"And the curse seems to be linked to your reproductive system. That explains why it only affects females in your familial line," Padma continued, her mind making the logical connections. "You said your aunt had a child around the same age as yours when her symptoms presented?"

"Yes. A son."

She made another note.

"Has your son had any troubles since birth?"

"None. He's been perfectly healthy all along," I replied, my anxiety growing at the thought of something happening to Scorpius. "Do you think—"

"Has anything happened to your cousin?" Padma cut me off, stopping my spiral before it could really begin.

"I'm honestly not sure. I haven't spoken to him in years, but I know he's still alive. I think he's doing well."

Giving me a kind smile, she said, "Then I'm sure your son is fine. There are just certain questions I have to ask."

I returned her smile, acknowledging what she'd said.

"Has your son shown signs of magic?" Healer Shafiq asked.

"Oh, absolutely," I stated. "He actually had magic very early on. Draco and I were very surprised."

"And is your husband here with you today?" Padma enquired.

"He's not. He's at work and I didn't want to worry him. He knows I'm here, though."

"Okay. Well, Astoria — do you mind if I call you Astoria?"

"That's perfectly fine," I answered.

Padma scrutinised my face, likely trying to decide if I was being genuine. "Right. Well, we need to run a lot of tests this morning. I need to get baseline levels and take a look at the curse again. Magical diagnostics have come a long way in the past twenty years, so I'm hopeful that we'll be able to discover something new to at least control this curse, if not counter it."

Her words were encouraging, but I wasn't sure that she really believed them. I remembered how my aunt had wasted away, spending all of her days in a dark room, drowning in her misery as her magic disappeared. It would be so easy to do the same, to just say to hell with all of it — with Draco, with Lucius and Narcissa, with Hermione Granger.

However, I started to think about Scorpius and all the things I would miss if I didn't take the opportunity to fight this curse. If I just gave up, I wouldn't get the chance to see his first journey to King's Cross or receive a letter telling me he'd been sorted into Slytherin. I wouldn't see him fall in love, get married, have children of his own.

I didn't want to miss those things.

So, even though I felt like I'd fought a war and lost over the past three years, I met Padma's eyes and said, "Okay. The sooner we get started, the more time we have."

Hermione — 2nd-3rd July 2007

At half past five, I heard a tapping noise in my sitting room. Glancing over to the source of the noise, I saw a snowy owl that reminded me of Hedwig, its black and white feathers eye-catching and its amber eyes inquisitive. While owl post was obviously not unusual in the wizarding world, I found it odd since I'd rarely received an owl in the past few years. Harry and Blaise had mobiles and Ron Floo called me.

Blaise.

The very thought of him still caused pangs of both sadness and anger to radiate through me, but the memory of the mobiles — of the night he'd captured Dolohov — made me miss him just a little bit.

But I didn't let myself fixate on that for long.

The owl tapped its beak against the windowpane impatiently since I'd made eye contact and then ignored its presence for a moment. Making my way to the window, I let the unfamiliar bird in. When it extended its leg, I saw a plain parchment scroll — no fancy wax-sealed envelope — and untied it.

At the sight of Draco's handwriting, I was shocked.

Granger,

I'm really sorry, but I can't make it tonight. Something's come up and I have to be at home. I'll call tomorrow morning and let you know what my schedule will be like for the next few days.

DM

As my eyes skimmed over the words again and again, I tried not to jump to conclusions. He'd told me he was unsure of when he'd be available tonight, and he simply wasn't. I looked over at the table, my eyes taking in all the things I'd laid out for tonight, and disappointment settled over me.

They were all items meant to prompt his memory in one way or another. I had wanted to try engaging his other senses — the things that I couldn't have taken away from him. Like taste and smell, and sounds.

I sighed and internally berated myself; it had been a bad idea, anyway. I'd let myself get carried away after the sentimental Valentine's Day memory.

Taking out my wand, I vanished everything on the table, save for the Pensieve and the trunk. I stared into the empty basin and thought back to the Monday Draco and I had returned from Paris.

When I closed my eyes, I saw Blaise's face and how tight his jaw had been clenched. And then, seemingly out of nowhere, more came rushing back to me, and I wanted to examine it in a new light. So much had changed since then, and I had to look at it again.

I pulled the memory from my mind and settled it into the Pensieve, letting myself fall back in.

As she sat at her desk, memory Hermione smiled to herself, her quill scratching along a piece of parchment. Minutes ticked by and, when she finished what she was working on, she glanced at her watch. Standing to stretch, she was startled by a knock on the door.

After smoothing her skirt and blouse back into place, memory Hermione said, "Come in."

I remembered that I'd been expecting Draco to enter my office. However, it had been Blaise who walked through the door.

"Hey, Hermione. Do you have a minute?"

She smiled at him and gestured to the chair in front of her desk. "Of course. What do you need?"

Settling in, he looked her over. "You went to Paris."

It was a statement, not a question, but she answered anyway.

"I did."

"Why?" Blaise asked.

Memory Hermione's eyes moved down towards her lap. "It really isn't any of your concern."

He arched an eyebrow at her. "Listen, I am concerned. You and I have been friendly for a while now. He's my best mate, and the two of you are heading for disaster—"

"I love him," she interrupted, her voice strong. "Merlin help me, Blaise. I love him."

"He's married, Hermione," he answered softly, causing her to flinch. "I'm not trying to be cruel, but what could you possibly hope to gain?"

Through the tears in her eyes, she looked at him.

"I don't know how to explain it," she began, twisting her fingers in her lap. "But when it comes to Draco, I can't stay away from him. I've tried."

Extending his hand towards memory Hermione, Blaise waited until she took it and then said, "You deserve more than what he's giving to you. You know that, right?"

She squeezed his fingers. "You don't know what he gives me. You've never seen us alone together." At his lascivious expression, she added, "It's more than sex. We just… We fit so well."

"But he goes home to his wife every night."

The words hurt, even now. I could remember the pain I felt every time he left, taking a little piece of me with him.

"Honestly, he stays with me more often than not," memory Hermione replied quietly. "I know it's wrong—"

"It is wrong," Blaise said. "Astoria doesn't deserve this. She only did what all pureblood girls do — she accepted a marriage contract. She waited for Draco to be ready, and she upheld her part of the bargain."

His words were like a slap to the face.

"I can't think about Astoria." She pulled her hand away from him and pressed the pads of her fingertips into her eyes. "Blaise, I need you to stop. Can you please just… Be there for me? Be a friend to me? You're the only one who knows, and—"

"Tesoro, I am trying to be a friend to you," he responded, the nickname making memory Hermione's cheeks flush. "You may not understand right now, but this kind of affair — it will not end well. For any of you."

"He told me to give him time. I think he's going to leave her."

Looking resigned, Blaise sat back in the chair and eyed her sceptically. "Isn't that what all married men say?"

Now, of course, I knew that Draco had been one of those stereotypical cheaters. He'd gotten Astoria pregnant less than two months later.

"You're not going to change my mind," she told him, meeting his eyes. "For the first time in three years, I'm happy. He makes me feel incredible, and he loves me."

"Oh, I have no doubt that he loves you." Blaise's hands covered his face. "That's never even been in question."

"Is this some weird thing where you're okay with him having an affair, but the other woman deserves a scarlet letter—"

He laughed aloud. "Not even close. It's just a tangled web that three of my friends are caught in."

Memory Hermione blushed again. "Sorry. I'm just so used to the blame being placed on the woman instead of the man."

"Hermione, I definitely blame Draco. He should've grown some balls long before he married Astoria," he said, his dark eyes focused on me. "I tried to get him to tell you—"

The office door opened and Draco stepped through, a smile on his face until he noticed Blaise in the chair.

"Am I interrupting something?" memory Draco asked, arching an eyebrow.

I looked him over. Despite the winter weather, he'd come into my office with the sleeves of his button-down shirt rolled to his elbows, his forearms on full display. It was a sight that made my mouth water back then, and even now, I couldn't help but stare. His hair was artfully messy, his silver eyes hard and steely with jealousy.

"Not at all, mate," Blaise said, standing up slowly. "I was just asking Granger for some advice on where to take my non-Valentine's date. She's a lot like her."

The lie had fallen from his lips so easily, and I remember feeling apprehensive about it even then. Blaise could smooth things over like no one else, especially when it came to Draco. That should have been a glaring red flag for me.

"Oh. You should take her to Paris," memory Draco replied with a grin, giving Blaise the name of the hotel we'd stayed at over the weekend. "It's quite lovely. Balconies and deep bathtubs and spacious showers. Plenty of space to—"

Memory Hermione rose and clapped her hand over memory Draco's mouth, her cheeks as red as her lipstick.

"I should Avada you," she hissed in his ear.

Blaise simply narrowed his eyes. "Malfoy, why do you feel the need to kiss and tell?"

Memory Draco shrugged his shoulders and nipped at memory Hermione's palm, catching her skin between his teeth.

"Blaise, what we discussed — don't tell anyone about it," she said, her eyes pleading.

"Of course not, Tesoro," he replied, tossing her a wink on his way out the door. "I'll leave you two to whatever this is."

As soon as the door closed, memory Draco said, "What did you tell him?"

Memory Hermione sighed. "He wasn't talking about where to take a date. He was warning me off of you again—"

"Fucking hell," he groaned, pulling away. "When did you two start speaking anyway?"

"That doesn't matter. I told him that I loved you, Draco. I asked him to stop trying to get me to change my mind."

He looked at her incredulously, as if he couldn't believe that she was telling anyone that she loved him.

Even though he'd just pulled away, he closed the distance again, kissing her like he'd die without her lips pressing against his. She met each stroke of his tongue, each caress of his hands with one of her own.

I squeezed my eyes shut.

I'd been caught between them, even then. It was clear now that they were fighting for my attention.

Blaise may not have said it outright, but he was trying to lure me away from Draco. Some of his reasoning may have been noble, but I now knew there was selfishness and deceit hidden beneath it all.

They'd both been bad for me, fighting over me without saying it outright. I didn't think Blaise had ever told Draco about his feelings, but I'd seen the suspicion in those silver eyes. He'd been worried that I'd eventually listen to Blaise and leave him.

Just a second later, I pulled myself from the memory, not able to stomach watching Draco kiss me until my blood boiled, until I caved and let him come home with me for yet another night.

As soon as I was out of the Pensieve, I moved to my couch and sat down, leaning forward and bracing my elbows on my knees. My breaths were short and shallow and I pressed the heels of my hands into my eyes.

I knew it was irrational, but I felt the same way I had when Draco had cancelled plans on me during the affair. Even though this was a different situation, my brain and my body felt the same loss and panic.

I couldn't completely separate the past from the present, and I didn't know what to do.

So, rather than trying to convince myself this was truly different, I did what I used to do. I took deep breaths and held them in to calm my racing heart. I kept my eyes closed and tried to focus on the dancing colors behind my eyelids. I listened to the sounds of my empty little house, trying to sink into reality.

After a few minutes, I was calmer and thinking more rationally. I slowly blinked, clearing my vision, and then pulled my hands away. When my eyes refocused, they caught on the Patronus figurines again and I sighed.

Taking my wand from my pocket, I focused on James' smile and Sev's giggles and Lily's sweet baby coos.

But when I tried to cast my Patronus, nothing happened.

Again, I closed my eyes. I thought of runes and Parisian hotels and red dresses, of silver eyes and sparkling diamonds, of teaching this charm in my knickers and a t-shirt.

And, this time, my dragon appeared. He flapped his wings and turned towards me, flying over and curling around my shoulders. As soon as his light filled the room, I felt calmer.

My initial ire at my changed Patronus was gone.

Now I was more curious than anything. I kept thinking about when it had changed and why.

The why was seemingly an easy answer — I'd fallen in love with Draco.

But, at the same time, I'd still had my otter after I realised that I loved Draco. When I was teaching him the charm, my Patronus was an otter…

Turning my head, I met the dragon's eyes.

"Why?" I asked rhetorically, and he tried to nuzzle against my face.

It was an odd sensation since he was made of magic and vapour, but I felt a tingle that I hadn't in quite some time. It was like the feeling of his magic brushing against mine.

Emotional upheaval could also lead to a Patronus change, so it stood to reason that mine had changed when I Obliviated Draco. I also remembered what Harry had told me — Draco's Patronus was an otter at St Mungo's when Scorpius was born.

Was it possible that a part of Draco had stayed with me? And a part of me had stayed with him?

The dragon around my shoulders was still soothing me and, rather than fighting it or questioning it, I just let it be.

I loved Draco before, and I'd accepted years ago that a part of me would always love him.

I was just starting to question how large that part of me actually was.

The next morning, I woke to the sound of the Floo chiming.

Startled, I nearly rolled off the couch. Catching myself at the last minute, I managed to sit up and tug my t-shirt back into place. I ran my hands over my hair and groaned; there was nothing to be done about it.

A split second later, Draco's face appeared in a burst of flames.

"Granger?" he called before his eyes fell on me.

"Good morning," I said, stifling a yawn.

"Can I come through? I think we should talk in person."

As always, those words twisted my insides.

"Sure," I replied, rising from the couch. "The connection is open to you. You know that."

He nodded and then disappeared, rematerialising as a whole person and stepping into my living room.

"Did you sleep on the couch?"

I rolled my eyes and gestured to the book on my coffee table. "I fell asleep reading."

While that was wholly untrue, I wasn't going to tell him that I'd laid there watching my dragon fly around the room until I'd dozed off.

My eyes started scanning his face and I could tell something was wrong. He looked like he'd hardly slept at all and there was a permanent crease between his brows. Those things were only really visible when he was more stressed than usual.

"I'm sorry about last night," Draco began, moving over to the armchair and slumping into it. "I know I should've come by, but I could barely get away to send that owl."

"It's fine. We never set an exact time or anything—"

"I know, it's just — you were so upset on Sunday. I didn't want to cancel, but Astoria needed me after her appointment."

Swallowing my emotions, I asked, "Is everything okay?"

He closed his eyes and I tried not to panic. If he couldn't look at me, this likely wasn't going to be good.

"She's very sick," he said, pinching the bridge of his nose. "There is a curse — a blood curse — on the Greengrass female line. It's been activated in her and is absorbing all of her magic."

"Draco, I'm so sorry."

His hands slid into his fringe and tugged. "Granger, they said it's attached to her reproductive system. They want to run tests on Scorpius to make sure he's okay, and I just... I don't know what to do."

It took everything in my power to stay on the couch.

"Do they think it was active when she gave birth?"

"All her scans were normal during the pregnancy and her magic levels were fine then," he answered, meeting my eyes. "They think that it was activated by Scorpius somehow. By the birth."

If the curse was focused on her sex organs, it made sense.

"Has her magic been waning that long?"

"I honestly couldn't tell you. I mean, I saw her do the typical things. Levitate things to amuse him, hair and make-up charms, but never anything exceedingly difficult. I just — I don't get it. She knew about the curse, and she just told me that she was just naturally frail and prone to illness."

Biting my lip, I held back what I wanted to say — Lucius would've invalidated the contract if he'd known she was carrying a potentially fatal curse.

Instead, I asked, "What are they doing for her?"

"A lot of tests right now," he replied, looking down at his lap. "But the curse has gone untreated for so long that she has very little free magic in her system. Padma Patil is handling her case and calling in other specialists."

"I've heard she's a good healer," I offered. "I'm sure Astoria and Scorpius will be in very capable hands, and your father will make sure of it."

He sighed. "I'm supposed to be looking for a flat of my own and moving out of the house, but I don't know if I can do that now. I'm not sure she can be alone with Scorpius."

My heart thumped.

He was moving out?

"Do you — Will your father send help from the Manor?"

Shrugging, he glanced at me again. "I'm sure he'd be willing to, but shouldn't I be the one to care for my son?"

My hands trembled, so I tucked them under my thighs.

"You need to do what's best for you and Scorpius. If that means moving out and taking him with you, then do that. If you're fine staying with Astoria, then you could both stay where you are," I answered, trying to be as rational as possible.

"I promised her I wouldn't take Scorpius away from her when we divorced."

Divorce.

The one word that had been the bane of my existence for nearly a year. The thing he'd promised me years ago was finally coming to pass, but I knew it didn't mean anything. However, I couldn't stop myself from asking one thing.

"Your father is going to sign off on it?"

He let out a laugh, but it was more pained than happy. "Granger, I don't need him to."

"What?"

"I don't need his permission," Draco stated. "Apparently, I'd hired someone to look into it. As of November 2005, I would have known that I was free to divorce Astoria as soon as the baby was born." He looked me straight in the eyes. "Timing is everything, and I always seem to be just a little too late."

My chest rose and fell faster and I was completely tongue-tied.

"Look, I'm not telling you that to make you feel guilty or anything. I just — I've known for a week, and I didn't know how to tell you. I didn't want to lie to you."

I felt my eyes watering and blinked quickly, trying to clear the tears away.

He didn't want to lie to me.

Even after everything, he still respected me enough to tell me the truth. He didn't handle me with kid gloves or doubt my ability to handle anything.

That realisation coupled with the Patronus revelation of the night before was too much for my brain to handle.

I sobbed and covered my face with my hands.

"I'm s-sorry." The tears were making my throat swell, choking me. "Gods, I'm s-sorry."

"Granger," he said quietly. "Look at me."

Shaking my head, I rubbed at my eyes. "I c-can't."

"You asked me not to touch you in the Pensieve when you were like this, but it fucking hurts when you're crying right in front of me and I can't do anything to help."

His words registered with me, and I knew he was trying to respect my boundaries, but I wanted him to push them. I wanted him to come to me, to take me into his arms the way he had so many times before.

I still loved him. But I didn't deserve him.

He'd loved me. He'd been trying to divorce Astoria. He was on the verge of leaving her when I'd given up on him, and he still respected me. He was honest and he cared.

Since he'd come back into my life, I'd done nothing but assume the worst of him.

Slowly, I looked up at him. He was standing, not sitting, but he was frozen.

"You can't touch me," I said, hoping he'd understand my meaning. "You just — you can't. Not skin to skin."

He looked down at his bare hands and nodded, likely remembering the way it felt when we'd touched in the DMLE.

"Okay. Not skin to skin."

As he stepped closer, I felt my heart speeding up and I couldn't breathe. Quickly, I stood and, realising my arms were bare, summoned the cardigan I'd left hanging on the back of a dining chair. He waited for me to put it on and it somehow felt more intimate than undressing for him.

And then his hands landed on my upper arms and he was so close.

So fucking close to me.

When I looked up at him, I silently begged for him to embrace me, to wrap me in his arms and never let go.

But he didn't.

Instead, his palms slid up and down, the friction heating my covered skin and I heard my breathing grow louder.

"I have to go," he said, though he made no move to leave. "I need to get to work."

I nodded and bit my lip. "I know."

"Are you okay?" he asked. "I didn't mean to upset you."

"It's not your fault," I replied. "Really, I'm glad you told me. And that you're free to do what you like."

His hands kept moving and I wondered if he knew how good it felt, if he took comfort in it, as well.

"We can talk more tonight. Astoria is staying over at St Mungo's for some tests and Scorpius is with my parents."

"Okay," I said, trying not to draw parallels to when he'd told me Astoria was out of town in another life.

"Do you need me to ring Potter? Or Pansy?"

"I'm okay, Draco." I stepped back, but he didn't let go.

His grip tightened and he surveyed my face.

Bending my elbows, I brought my hands up and settled them on his forearms, forming an awkward hug of sorts. I squeezed.

"Really, I'm fine. Go to work," I said. "I'll see you tonight."

"Are we—Did you want to have dinner?"

"I'll make something. Any requests?"

He still hadn't let go of me. "I think you probably know what I like better than I do."

I blinked and when I opened my eyes, he was looking down at my mouth. Taking a deep breath, I released him and stepped back again.

This time, he let his hands fall.

"I'll make something," I repeated stupidly and he nodded.

"See you tonight."

"Tonight."